Work Text:
<3 Eight is Fate <3
Innie
I have to tell you guys something.
I’ve been thinking about this for a while and you guys deserve to know before this goes too far.
(1308)
Hyunie
Before what goes too far?
(1309)
Lix
What’s wrong babe?
(1309)
Chan
Innie?
(1309)
Ji
???????
(1309)
Hyunie
Say something babe. You’re scaring me.
(1310)
Innie
Fuck
Aren’t you all doing work things right now???
Why are you looking at your phones??
(1312)
Bin
Ji and I managed to convince Chanie to have a late lunch with us.
(1312)
Hyunie
The slave dri - I mean- Min was gracious enough to let Lixie and I take a break.
(1312)
Minnie
I’m in the car on my way back from the interview. Traffic is terrible.
(1313)
Innie
Fuck
(1314)
Chan
Innie, what’s wrong? Did we do something?
(1314)
Hyunie
Yeah.
And you didn’t answer my question. What’s going to go too far?
(1315)
Innie
Okay look
I need to tell you all something
Something important
But it’s kind of a lot and it’s hard for me to say
I was planning on sending it as a text while you all were working
Because it seemed easier than saying it face to face
But for once in your lives, all seven of you are actually taking a break
At the same damn time no less
(1316)
Chan
You can tell us anything. We’re here for you. You know that, right?
(1316)
Innie
I do
But this is something really big
And I’m still a little unsure about it
But you all deserve to know because we’re together now
And this will definitely affect our relationship
(1317)
Min
Innie, this sounds like something we should be talking about in person
(1317)
Chan
Min’s right.
Innie, we can all be home shortly. Can you wait?
(1317)
Innie
NO!
I have to do it like this
I’ll chicken out any other way
(1318)
Ji
You’re not breaking up with us are you?
(1318)
Innie
No
At least I don’t want to
But you all might after I tell you what I have to say
(1319)
Lix
Innie, you’re really scaring me now.
What’s going on?
(1320)
Innie
Fuck
Okay
Can you guys promise not to say anything until I’m done?
(1321)
Chan
Of course babe
Bin and Ji are nodding
(1321)
Min
You have my word
I’ll break fingers if I have too
(1321)
Hyunie
Rude!
Lix and I promise as well. No threats necessary!
(1322)
Minnie
We’ll listen, Innie. Please tell us what’s on your mind
(1322)
Innie
Thank you
(1322)
Innie
I’ve been thinking about this for a while, probably since debut. I’ve always known I liked men but my desires for a relationship never seemed to go as far as other people. Like I’ve always liked the basic idea of being in a relationship, being treated as special to someone, or a group of someones. But the physical aspect of relationships have always seemed unnecessary to me. Gross even.
(1324)
Innie
For a long while I thought I’d grow out of that feeling. That I was just being immature. But I never seemed to. I’d listen to older trainees, or you guys, talking about wanting to do things with other people and I just couldn’t understand the appeal. Still dont, if I’m being honest.
(1326)
Innie
Like I enjoy kissing you guys and snuggling but that’s really as far as it goes for me.
In terms of desire
I’ve never felt the urge to have sex or doing anything sexual with you guys or anyone for that matter
Which doesn’t mean I don’t like you guys or don't want to be in a relationship with all of you
Because I do
I really do
Fuck
I’m off track
What I’m trying to say is I’m asexual
(1329)
Innie
That’s all I had to say. I understand if you all don’t want to be with me knowing that. It might make things awkward between us.
(1330)
Chan
I don’t speak for everyone but for me, sex isn’t everything in a relationship. Thank you for trusting us with this information. We’re all going to have our own boundaries as we explore our relationship. And that’s fine.
(1331)
Lix
^
(1331)
Ji
^^
(1332)
Minnie
I agree with Chan. There’s more to being in a relationship than having sex.
(1333)
Min
There’s nothing wrong with not wanting to have sex. That doesn’t change how I feel about you.
(1333)
Bin
Pretty much everything I could say has been said and I agree with all of it
(1334)
Hyunie
Same as Bin
(1335)
Innie
You guys aren’t upset?
(1335)
Lix
Never, honey
Not for something like this
This is who you are. Being mad at you for being asexual would be like being mad at Chan for having shoulders wider than the ocean or Hyunjin for being tall
It would just be silly
You’re perfect the way you are and we want to be with you as you are
(1337)
Innie
Thanks Lixie
(1337)
Hyunie
Can you maybe tell us a little more about where your limits are?
You mentioned kissing. Can we kiss you anytime? Or would you prefer to initiate?
(1338)
Innie
Kissing’s fine
You guys can kiss me whenever you want
Well within reason lol
And I like snuggling with like no intentions to do anything
Just like being close to you all is nice
(1338)
Hyunie
Thank you honey
I think I can speak for everyone when I say we don’t want to make you uncomfortable
(1339)
Chan
We don’t
And if your boundaries ever change, even if it’s something like deciding you want to be the only one to initiate kisses, please tell us
Nothing is set in stone
(1340)
Innie
Thanks Chanie
(1340)
Chan
Anytime honey
Is it okay if Bin, Ji and I come home now?
Ji keeps saying he wants to hug you
(1341)
Ji
Only if that’s okay with you!
(1341)
Innie
Lol yeah you can guys can come home if you want
I think the worst of it was just getting it out in the open
And I would love a hug Ji
(1342)
Chan
Okay, we’re gonna get packed up then
Should be home shortly
(1343)
Min
We’ll meet you in the lobby, Chan
(1343)
Chan
Sounds good Min
Shit gtg
Bin and Ji just took off running
(1344)
Minnie
I should be home in 20 minutes
(1344)
Jeongin let out a shaky breath as he dropped his phone on the bed next to him. Bonelessly he flopped back against his pillow, relief rushing through him. He never expected them to hate him but he had been so afraid they wouldn’t want him to be a part of their relationship any more. The anxiety at that thought had been enough to make him sick to his stomach. He loved them all with every fragment of his being, even if it was too early to tell them that, the idea of being rejected by them had kept him up at night.
But they hadn’t.
He wanted to scream it from the rooftops. His boyfriends accepted him as he was. A stupidly wide grin spread across his face at that thought. He was asexual and his boyfriends still wanted him. Nothing could be more perfect.
He wasn’t sure how much time had passed, laying there basking in his happiness, before he heard the front door open and then shut again. The tell tale sounds of shoes and bags dropping filtered through his shut door. He expected them to burst into his room, full of their usual energy and enthusiasm. Instead he was left with growing anticipation as he could make out the sounds of talking but not what was being said, followed by the sounds of other doors being opened and people rushing around the dorm. Just as he was about to get up and see what was going on. There was a gentle knock on his door.
“Innie,” Chan’s voice called gently through the door. “Can I come in?”
“Yes,” Jeongin called back, propping himself up on his elbows a little.
Chan wasted no time opening the door and entering now that permission had been given. Worry was clear on his face but it was mixed with affection. Jeongin sat all the way up now, tracking Chan’s hesitant movements as he approached.
Jeongin smiled at him. “I’ll stop you if you do anything that makes me uncomfortable. I promise.”
“Okay,” Chan told him with a nod, coming to a stop next to Jeongin’s bed.
He still looked unsure, hands and arms making aborted movements, eyes flicking over Jeongin staring up at him.
“What do you want to do right now, Chanie?” Jeongin asked.
“Hold you,” Chan answered.
“Then come here.” Jeongin fixed him with a bright grin.
And that was all Chan needed. He was crawling into the bed with Jeongin. He wrapped a strong arm around Jeongin’s waist, pulling him backward to sit between Chan’s legs. Jeongin put up no fight, just let Chan arrange his limbs how he saw fit, leaning back against Chan’s strong chest. Eventually, Chan stopped fidgeting with a content sigh as he nuzzled against Jeongin’s hair.
“I know I said it over text but I want to say it in person again,” Chan whispered, cheek pressed against the side of Jeongin’s head. “Thank you for telling us. Coming out a second time can’t have been easy. I’m proud of you for being so brave.”
“I should have told you all when we first got together,” Jeongin mumbled, hands wrapping around Chan’s forearms where they rested on his waist. “I knew then too. Or at least I was ninety percent sure I wasn’t growing out of my feelings about sex. But I was scared.”
“It’s okay,” Chan reassured him. “You don’t owe anyone, even us, anything until you’re ready to share it.”
Jeongin nodded mutely, letting himself relax just a little bit more into Chan’s embrace. Through the open door, the sounds of the other’s scurrying around the apartment floated in. There was an odd lack of shouting for so many of them being home at one time.
“What are they doing?” Jeongin asked, half trying to change the subject because if Chan continued, Jeongin was going to cry.
“You’ll see,” Chan said cryptically. “I can’t imagine it will take them much longer.”
Jeongin just nodded, whatever they were planning Chan wouldn’t spoil it. For the moment he would just appreciate the warmth of Chan’s embrace. Being held by each of his boyfriend’s was different in the best way possible. It was like an extension of their personalities in a way. Being in Chan’s arms always felt safe, like nothing in the world could harm him.
For a few minutes all that Jeongin could hear was their breathing and the continued sounds of the others bustling around. Then there was the sound of the front door being opened and shut was followed by cries of “Minnie!”
“Oh good,” Chan mumbled. “Minnie made it. He was worried about traffic.”
Before Jeongin had a chance to ask what Seungmin had been worried about missing, Jisung tumbled into the room, followed by Hyunjin. They looked vaguely disheveled, hair in disarray with bright grins on their faces.
“Hi Innie,” Hyunjin greeted brightly.
“Hi Hyunie,” Jeongin returned the greeting, confusion in his voice.
“Sorry that took so long,” Jisung said. “Min and Binnie had to convince Lix that not every stuffie he owned was necessary. But Minnie’s home now!”
“So we heard.” Jeongin could feel Chan’s nod. “Is everything ready?
“Yup!” Hyunjin was rocking on his heels, clearly excited for whatever they had done.
“Just need Innie!” Jisung added.
“Perfect.”
Without warning, Chan scooched forward forcing Jeongin along with him. Once his feet were planted on the floor, he reached forward to catch under Jeongin’s knees. In one smooth movement, he stood up, holding Jeongin against his chest bridal style. If Jeongin squeaked at the sudden action, he would never admit it. With Hyunjin and Jisung trailing after them excitedly, Chan made his way into the living room.
The living room which had every piece of furniture pushed against the walls, making space for what could only be described as a giant blanket nest. It looked like every blanket that wasn’t in Jisung and Jeongin’s room had been conscripted for duty. All their pillows and what looked like the couch cushions, lined the edges. And if Minho and Changbin had tried to convince Felix that all of his stuffies were unnecessary, Jeongin would have to say they lost that particular battle. Most of Felix’s collection appeared to be either tucked into the blankets or sitting in the spaces between the pillows. And Jeongin definitely spotted Changbin’s Gyu in the nest as well. Soft music was playing from the T.V. But the best part of it was the rest of his boyfriends lounging in the nest looking happily up at them.
Chan had barely set Jeongin down in the center before Felix and Jisung were cuddling up to him. Jisung pulled Jeongin against his chest, arm wrapped loosely around his waist. Felix snuggled up close, one hand fisting the front of Jeongin’s t-shirt, their legs tangling, a bright smile on his face. Jeongin wanted to say something. Anything. Thank them for accepting him. But his throat felt thick and the telltale burning of oncoming tears was making the corners of his eyes hot.
“We’re here, honey,” Changbin said softly, hand reaching over Felix to stroke Jeongin’s cheek gently. “We’ve got you.”
Jeongin swallowed thickly as he nodded.
“Always here for you,” Minho said, dropping a kiss against his temple.
The angle of the kiss had Jeongin thinking that Minho had chosen to cuddle up to Jisung. A hand that could only be Seungmin’s based on the size was carding softly through Jeongin’s hair. The hand stayed in his hair, even as long thin fingers tilted his chin up. Hyunjin was looking back at him with a soft expression.
“So pretty,” Hyunjin cooed at him.
Jeongin averted his eyes as his cheeks flushed. As he looked away, he caught sight of Chan, curled around Changbin, head resting on Hyunjin’s hip. Looking back at Felix did nothing to help the slowly building tears, there was so much affection in his pretty features it was overwhelming. Before he really had a chance to stop them, the tears were spilling over and running down his cheeks. Felix released his grip on Jeongin’s shirt, hand coming up to gently brush away the tears.
“Oh, honey,” Felix cooed. “Why are you crying?”
“I-I’m ju-just so happy,” Jeongin sobbed. “I’m sorry.”
“No, no,” Felix’s voice was soft and warm. “No need to be sorry. You’re allowed to express your emotions however feels right.”
“I’m so relieved,” Jeongin admitted as he scrubbed at his eyes with his free hand. “I was so worried you all wouldn’t want me in our relationship anymore. Once you knew.”
“Oh, Innie,” Jisung whispered, before pressing a soft kiss to the shell of Jeongin’s ear.
“And knowing you all accept me,” Jeongin paused for a shaky breath. “It’s just a lot. But thank you. All of you.”
“Of course,” Seungmin said, in a tone that implied there had never been another option.
A smile tugged at Jeongin’s lips. “Can we just lay here for a little while?”
From behind him, he heard Minho chuckle. “What do you think we went through all this effort for?”
“I think what Minho means,” Chan said, in what they liked to call his leader-lite voice. “Is that we can stay here as long as you’d like.”
“Thank you,” Jeongin said softly, tucking his head against Felix’s neck, eyes falling shut.