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"I hate space," Tony says, staring at the very single bed in the only room that was free. Loki pushes past him and flings himself down onto it, looking the very picture of unconcerned elegance. Bastard.
"So you've mentioned. Many times," Loki's reply is as dry as the desert they'd just finished crossing. Not an experience Tony wants to repeat. Purple sand gets way less fun after ten minutes of trudging through it.
Loki opens his mouth to say more. Don't say it. Don't say it, asshole. He's had enough of Loki saying it, it's been hours of Loki saying it.
"Perhaps if someone hadn't pointed a particle beam at the Tesseract, we wouldn't be in this mess. Without the Tesseract to get us back."
"Oh my god," Tony groans, turning and hitting his head against the door. Then empty air. He loses his balance and falls through the doorway. Automatic doors. Right.
Loki's peals of laughter at his plight sound from inside and he grunts.
"Okay, you know what? No. You don't get to leave that thing around in my workshop while I'm working! Who knows what could happen? Oh! I do! Cause I'm stuck on an alien planet! With you!"
His point would've probably hit harder if he'd gotten up instead of pointing up from the floor. As it is, Loki looks particularly unimpressed.
"You were the one who wished to study it. I don't know what I was thinking obliging you. It is clear you mortals have no respect for the greater cosmic forces."
Tony scowls, picking himself up. He'll be feeling that fall for a few days. Ugh.
"I'll respect them when there's something to respect," he mutters. Not quietly enough.
Loki snorts.
"Think you it was an accident we landed on an inhabited planet rather than the void of space? You are lucky the Tesseract is fond of me."
Wait, what?
"Wait, what?" Tony turns to look at Loki, who pretends not to hear. His eyes are closed. Nope. No way is Tony letting the handsome asshole out of this one.
"Fond of you? It's a thing, it doesn't have the capacity to feel fondness." Unlike Tony, to his great irritation.
Loki opens one eye, a mix of ire and humor in its depths.
"Many would say the same of your children and they would be wrong, no? There are more things in heaven and earth, Stark, than are dreamt of in your philosophy. Now do cease your prattling," he throws a pillow at Tony's face, "I wish for some rest before we raid the spaceport tomorrow."
Tony barely catches the pillow and just gapes at Loki.
"Okay, what? Thor barely knows what a toaster is, how do you know enough Shakespeare to quote it at me? Also, I absolutely refuse to sleep on the floor. Of the two of us, who is the mortal who needs his beauty rest to be functional tomorrow? You've probably camped out for half your life on some crazy quest or another, you can take the floor."
He drops the pillow and shoves Loki. Lightly. Even with his full strength, without his suit he can't move Loki unless Loki wants him to. Tony knows, he's tried before, to Loki's great amusement.
Loki opens his eyes, irritated.
"Fine, Stark. If it will get you to shut up."
Well that was easy. Maybe too easy.
Loki leans over and picks the pillow up, putting it back into place. Then he stretches and with a shimmer of green light, a black cat stands in Loki's place. It looks at Tony with a haughty green-eyed gaze before curling up on the bed, only slightly off center. Dick. Stupid perfect dick with his stupid perfect face and legs that went on for miles.
Tony sighs, but takes the win. He's too exhausted to argue further and who knows what Loki will do if he gets really irritated. Maybe he'd turn Tony into a cat instead.
Tony gets onto the bed, lying on his side. He watches as Loki's breathing deepens, easily falling asleep in his cat form the way he rarely does in his usual one. Wait, is this why they keep finding him curled up napping the most absurd places?
Oh, he has to remember to get the security footage if they get back. When. When they get back. Maybe then he can also ask Loki to turn him into a cat. For research purposes. Totally. Not cause Tony wants to puke a hairball into his boots. No way.
Loki shifts a little and quiet purrs soon fill the small room.
Focusing on cat thoughts, Tony also drifts away.
He wakes from the deepest sleep he's had in a while when the pillow beneath him moves.
"Nghjk, five more minutes," he says. The pillow shakes. It smells nice.
"My, are you sure you wish to wait for five minutes? You do seem very eager to see me," Loki's voice purrs in his ear, so similar to the sound Tony fell asleep to.
The words register.
Tony bolts up from Loki's chest, cheeks flaming in embarrassment. Something else is flaming too, but Tony does his best to ignore it. So sue him, he hasn't had a body next to him in bed for a while. Nevermind such a pretty one.
"Ignore it, it'll go away. I'm just gonna go back into the desert and bury myself in it."
He tries to get up and yelps as Loki pulls him back, rolling them so he's hovering over Tony, lazy amusement in every line.
"And if I don't wish to ignore it?"
Oh! Tony looks down. Yup. Interest fully renewed, engines all revving. He should really get with the program.
He clears his throat.
"Well, then I guess we can always head to the spaceport after lunch?" He grins at Loki, relaxing when Loki doesn't move away. The banked desire in Loki's eyes grows.
Loki flashes his teeth at Tony, smile dark and hungry.
"Oh, it is adorable you think we'll make it there by lunch."
They don't. They skip dinner too.