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99 stares up at the doorway to Nala Se’s private laboratory, a heavy feeling in his heart. There’d never been a time in his life when he liked coming here and he doubted that would ever change. There were too many horrible memories that happened behind those doors for him to ever like being inside.
He shakes those dark thoughts from his head. Today was meant to be a happy day, for both him and little Omega. This would be the first day she’d be meeting the four brothers that had been decanted in Nala Se’s private lab. The four new clones had been created from a combination of experiments performed both on himself and Omega along with the Jango Fett gene template, so it was only fair that they get the chance to meet them. 99 had already met them a few days ago when Nala Se brought him to them. Now, it was his turn to do the same for Omega.
Omega was the only clone he had ever known to constantly be alone, with no brothers to find comfort in, besides him of course. As far as he knew, he was the only other clone she’d ever met. But that would change today.
When he finally enters Nala Se’s lab, he immediately notices Omega playing on the floor in the far corner of the room. Nala Se is typing away at a computer, seeming to have not even noticed his entrance. Good.
99 makes his way over to the young child playing on the floor. She was always so happy, bubbling with an infectious energy that never failed to put a smile on his face. She was too caught up in the imaginary game she was playing to even notice him approaching her. The dolls in each of her little hands jostle around as she moves them animatedly, talking enthusiastically to each of them.
“Good morning, kar’ika ,” he greets her.
A pair of deep brown eyes fly up to him as she finally notices him standing beside her. He smiles gently at her, kneeling down on the floor beside her. Her already bright smile somehow lights up even more in his presence.
“99!” she exclaims, rushing towards him. Her dark curls bounce as she runs into his arms. He wraps her in a tight hug as her small arms circle around his neck. She buries her face into his chest as his hand lifts to gently cup the back of her head. The day he learned that he was the only person who provided any physical touch for her, he had always been sure to be as physically affectionate with her as possible. He always waits for her to pull away from his arms first as he was more than happy to let her hug him for as long as she needed.
After a few more moments of being in his embrace, she pulls away with a wide smile on her face, “ Ori’vod 99, Nala Se says I get to meet four more brothers today!” she happily exclaims, holding up four tiny fingers to him.
“You do, and I get to come with you.”
“Really?” she asks, her voice going a pitch higher.
He laughs at her excitement, always at the smallest of things, “I sure am. They’re my brothers too, you know.”
She grabs his hands with both of her much smaller ones, “Then let’s go!! I wanna meet them!”
He rises and keeps her hand in his left one. They approach where Nala Se has remained for their conversation, but he’s sure she has been silently watching them the entire time.
“Miss Nala Se, 99 is here! Does that mean it’s time to go see the new babies?” Omega asks, her head tilted nearly all the way back so she can look into Nala Se’s eyes.
Nala Se turns toward them, with what looked like a hint of a smile across her features, “Yes, Omega. We can go see them now.”
Nala Se had always had a soft spot for Omega, that had been obvious to him for a long time. As happy as 99 was that Omega is shown such kindness by her, a part of him is angry that Nala Se still mistreats his brothers so severely. It was almost as if Nala Se was two different people around Omega and his brothers.
Omega pulled on his hand excitedly as Nala Se led them into the main room of the lab. He smiled softly at Omega, starting to swing their hands as they walked. She giggled at the motion and enthusiastically copied it with his hand. They didn’t have to go far before Nala Se stopped in front of a door.
“Omega, remember, you must behave. These clones will be very important to the Republic someday. You must treat them with care,” Nale Se told her.
“I will! I will, I promise!”
With her promise, Nala Se pressed a button and the door slid open. The lights were dimmed slightly in the room, likely to avoid waking the four sleeping babies. 99 could see the row of bassinets against the wall, each containing a baby brother.
He squeezes Omega’s hand, “Well, are you ready to go meet them?”
She squeezes his hand back, “Let’s go!”
He leads her to the closest bassinet, holding her hand still as they approach the baby inside, Solus, from the look of it. Omega is too small to see inside, the sight of her standing on her tiptoes but still being too short sends a chuckle through him.
“Here,” he bends down to pick her up, “Let me help you a little.”
He hoists her onto his hip as she wraps an arm around his shoulders. The awe and joy that grows across her face as soon as her eyes fall onto the little bundle before them will forever remain ingrained in 99’s memory as one of the happiest moments in his life. He hoped every brother got a chance, even just one chance, to be as happy as she was right now.
“He’s so little,” she whispers to him.
“He is very little. This one’s designation is CT-9901, but I call him Solus. ”
Omega smiles down at the baby, “Hello, Sol’ika .”
Solus turns to look at them, which makes the smile on Omega’s face widen. The soft yellow onesie that is custom for all newly decanted clones is almost too small for him, extra fabric ripples across his stomach as he moves. He kicks his small legs in excitement and babbles at Omega.
She giggles, “Awww, are you trying to say hello?”
Solus squeaks in response and fans out his arms. The two are clearly fascinated by each other, their eyes don’t leave each other for even a moment. If 99 didn’t know any better, he’d almost think they were speaking to each other in some bizarre language he didn’t understand.
“Can we go see the next baby?” she asks.
“Of course we can,” he says, “Goodbye, Solus .”
The next baby was T’ad , fast asleep. His small hands curled around his face and his chest rose and fell in even patterns. The blue pacifier in his mouth bobbed as he suckled on it. Omega’s face lit up once more as she looked down upon him.
99 held up a finger to his lips to make sure that she remained quiet so T’ad could keep sleeping.
“This is CT-9902. Want to guess what I call him?”
She giggles softly into his shoulder before turning to face him, “ T’ad! ”
He bounces her a few times on his hip, “Good job, Omega! I’m very proud of you for remembering that. Yes, this one I call T’ad. ”
“He’s cute, even smaller than Solus. ”
“ T’ad was the smallest of them all when he was decanted. I have a feeling he’ll get to be much bigger when he’s older.”
Omega stays silent, instead choosing to focus her attention back onto T’ad . After a moment of them watching him, T’ad begins to squirm in his sleep. He turns his head to the side and his pacifier slips out of his mouth onto the blanket of his crib.
“Oh no!” Omega says, quickly leaning over to reach into the crib to replace his pacifier. In the few seconds it takes for her to pick it up, T’ad wakes up. His dark brown eyes meet two pairs that match them exactly as he looks at the world around him.
“Awww, hello T’ad ! You dropped this, but it’s okay, your ori’vod Omega is here to help!” she says, putting the pacifier back into his mouth. He resumes his suckling but doesn't take his eyes off of her.
“He likes you, kar’ika .”
She reaches out and strokes the small tufts of dark brown hair that’ve grown across his head. A warm smile graces her face as she coos at her little brother, continuing to stroke his hair. A smile that matches the warmth of Omega’s grows across T’ad ’s face at the sensation. Both of them look so content, 99 can’t help but smile along with them. It’s truly a sweet moment. As much as little T’ad seems to enjoy the attention, he soon is lulled back to sleep by her touch.
“Wow, he fell back asleep really fast!”
“He sure did, we’ll have to have you come back later tonight to put them to bed. You’re a natural at this whole ori’vod business.”
She practically beams at the compliment as he carries her over to the next crib.
“Whoa! He’s gigantic compared to Solus and T’ad. ”
She wasn’t wrong, Ehn was the biggest baby he’d ever seen. Even the Commandos weren’t born this big. Rolls upon rolls line every inch of his body. There would come a day when all of his baby fat would be replaced by the muscle that the Kaminoans had engineered him to have, but for now, he sure was a chubby little thing.
“He is big. The Kaminoans made him to be that way. This is CT-9903, I call him-”
“- Ehn !” Omega finished for him.
He laughed, “Ah, well maybe they’re not the most original of nicknames.”
“I think it suits him. He looks like an Ehn. ”
A squeal from the crib draws their attention back to the baby. His arms reach out toward Omega in curiosity and she is more than happy to grab hold of his hand. His hand wraps around her fingers in a tight grip as he stares up at her with a warm expression on his face.
“Hi Ehn ! My name is Omega, I’m your ori’vod ! That means big sister.”
A curious look grows in his eyes as he gives her a lopsided smile. He pulls her fingers to his mouth in response and shoves them into his mouth, clearly his form of a greeting.
“ Ehn !” she giggles, “Don’t do that!”
From the smile that glows on her face and the way her fingers remain in his mouth, 99 can tell she isn’t really upset. Ehn takes her fingers out of his mouth after he is content with his greeting, a toothless grin across his face.
Omega gently pulls her fingers from his grasp and strokes his hair, “It was nice to meet you, Ehn .”
“Ready to meet the last one?” he asks. Maker, his arms were getting tired.
“Yup! Let’s go!” she called, excitedly kicking her feet along his ribs.
He makes his way in front of the final cradle. Cuir was awake, but looked like he was only a moment away from falling asleep.
“Now, since you seem to have caught onto my name game for these little ones, I’ll have you figure out what his name is,” he tells her.
“Hmmm,” she taps a finger against her chin, pondering his question, “Well we have Solus, T’ad, and Ehn , so that must mean this is Cuir !”
Now, what sort of big brother would he be if he didn’t mess with his little sister every now and then? Not a very good one. Not at all.
“Nope, guess again,” he says, a smirk on his face.
She turns to him with a bewildered look on his face. He laughed, a full belly laugh that made Omega bounce against his ribs.
“I’m just messing with you. Yes, this is Cuir .”
She swats at his arm playfully before turning her attention to the baby before them.
“Awww, somebody looks sleepy,” she mumbles softly, her focus completely on the small bundle before her.
She reaches into his crib and rubs gently across his belly. Cuir simply adores the small act of physical affection she is bestowing upon him. A small hand rises to rub his eyes as his eyelids begin to blink slower and slower. With one big yawn, he closes his eyes for the last time and falls into a deep sleep.
Omega pulls back from him and gives 99 a proud, content smile. He motions to shush her and she nods. No longer needing to carry her, he places her gently back onto the floor. Barely even a moment later, he misses the feeling of her in his arms.
Omega takes hold of his hand and leads him towards the rocking chair in the corner of the room, “Can I please please please hold one of them? I promise I’ll be careful!”
99 doubted he would ever be able to say no to her, but especially not now with the hopeful look that gleams in her eyes.
“Of course you can. Take a seat here, I’ll go get you a baby brother to hold.” He waits to see the blinding smile that stretches across her face before turning back towards the line of cribs.
As he approaches them all, it becomes clear that all of them but Solus are fast asleep. Not wanting to wake a sleeping baby, he carefully lifts Solus into the nook of his arm and carries him back to the girl practically bouncing with excitement.
“You see the way my arms are positioned?” She nods,“Copy just what I’m doing.”
“Like this?” she asks, moving her arms to mimic him.
“Perfect. Now stay very still, I'm going to put him into your arms.”
She stays completely still and silent as he lowers Solus into her arms. He quickly instructs her the proper way of holding him to make sure he stays safe, to which she listens intently. After his lecture, her eyes turn from him down to the small bundle in her arms. Solus stares right back up at her.
She raises a finger to trace along his cheek, “I can’t wait to do so many fun things with you, Solus . We’ll get to go on adventures together all across the galaxy!
99’s heart fell at her words, knowing that her hopes for the future would never be coming true. Her four brothers would become soldiers, just like every other clone on Kamino, and he doubted they would live long enough to see the end of wartime. He hoped they would, but clones were made for war; there was no life for them after war. It was a sad truth, but a truth all the same.
99 kneels in front of her as she continues holding and talking to Solus, gently rocking the chair for Omega and Solus with his hand. It’s a miracle little Solus has stayed awake this long, but he seems to be intently listening to every word she says. She describes the adventures she wants to have, tells him the stories that 99 tells her every night before bed, and even tells him some of her favorite facts about space. He smiles as she continues talking. Already, she’s such a wonderful ori’vod . Solus can only stay awake for so long, and eventually he nuzzles into Omega’s chest and starts to drift off.
Omega notices him starting to fall asleep and begins to hum the Mando’a lullaby that 99 sang to her every night. Considering how quickly she fell asleep whenever he sang it to her, he’s surprised she remembers so much of it.
“He looks cold,” Omega comments, gingerly stroking along the bare skin of his legs and arms that isn’t covered by his onesie.
99 moves to rest a hand on him, “I think he’s alright, but we can move him back to-”
“-No, wait, I have an idea!” she interrupts him, “Can you take him back for a minute?”
Before 99 can even answer, Solus is being pushed into his arms and Omega is running out of the room. Solus crankily cracks open an eye to look at him, to which 99 merely shrugs.
“Your ori’vod sure is something, ad’ika .” Solus merely blinks in response, not like he was really expecting a conversation with the baby. He bounces him in his arms as he waits for Omega to come back, softly humming the same Mando’a lullaby to him.
The rapid return of footsteps from the door drew 99’s attention back to Omega. She runs up to him, her beloved red baby blanket clutched in her hands. His heart warms at how willing she is to share her few belongings with her brothers.
“We can wrap him up in this!”
99 swallows the lump in his throat and nods, “Of course we can. Let me show you how to swaddle him.”
She laughs, “That’s a funny word.”
“It is. Now shhh,” he shushes her with a finger to his lips, “We want him to stay sleeping so he lets you hold him for a while. That’s what you want right? Unless your arms are tired, I could just put him back…”
“No, ori’vod stop messing with me! I wanna hold him forever and ever and ever!”
The two of them very carefully swaddle Solus in the blanket. He fits perfectly into the blanket and remains fast asleep even as 99 moves the sleeping bundle back into Omega’s arms. Unlike earlier, she doesn’t make a sound as she holds onto him, simply watching him sleep with her eyes full of admiration and love.
99 smiles at her before turning his gaze back to the three full cribs behind him. She was turning out to be a better ori’vod than even he was.
“Higher! Higher!” Ehn ’s sweet laughter rings out in the lab as 99 throws him up in the air. It was one of his favorite games and he always begged 99 to play it with him. He could hear the laughter from Omega and his other brothers from the other side of the room where they were playing. They had laid out Omega’s red baby blanket on the floor and were pretending to be animals in a forest.
He couldn’t believe these little ones were already one standard year, two biologically. Just last week they had celebrated their first birthday with a small celebration that he had planned secretly with Omega. 99 didn’t think he’d ever seen the boys so happy before, and Omega’s happiness had never dwindled since that first day she’d met them.
Whenever 99 came to Nala Se’s laboratory, he always found the five of them playing together. It was a sight that never failed to warm his heart, but also filled him with a deep sense of dread because he knew that one day they would be separated from each other. Most days, he tried not to think about that. He wanted to appreciate the joy they all had now before it was gone forever.
“ Ehn , we’re going to read some books. Would you like to come sit with us?” Omega calls from across the room.
“Yeah!” Ehn yells from his place above 99’s head. He wiggles his way out of 99’s arms and races to join his siblings on the floor. They quickly make up a little blanket fort to surround them. Omega sits in the middle with her four brothers pressed tightly to her sides. In her hands is one of the very few books that 99 has been able to smuggle past the Kaminoans. They’ve probably read each one a thousand times at this point, but they’re always excited to read it. If they’re happy, then so is he. Simple as that.
99 moves over to sit behind Omega, as he always did when she read to them to help her if she stumbled over the words. Solus and Cuir are curled into Omega’s sides and so he pulls T’ad and Ehn into his lap to let them see the beautiful illustrations of the book. Solus has wrapped himself in Omega’s red blanket and is practically buried into Omega’s left side. Out of all of them, he loved Omega the most.
“Go ahead, Omega. We’re all listening.”
She smiles brightly and begins reading through the book. 99 could probably recite the book from memory word for word at this point, but he’s more than happy to listen to it everyday for the rest of his life if it continues to make his siblings happy.
They’re all so focused on the book, even 99, that nobody notices Nala Se enter the room. Usually she would leave them alone and he’d hardly ever seen her approach them when he was present, but today was clearly different.
“Omega,” Nala Se interrupts their reading, “it is time for you to say goodbye.”
Omega turns to face Nala Se with a puzzled look on her face, “Goodbye? But the day isn’t even over yet.”
“It is time for these four clones to leave my lab and go to be put with the other clones. They’re old enough now. They no longer need to stay here.”
99 knows that this means Omega will never see them again. That very same realization slowly creeps into the mind of Omega and tears begin to well up in her eyes. She puts down the book that she’d been reading to her brothers and wraps them all into a tight hug.
“No, I want them to stay with me. Why can’t they stay with me?”
Nale Se sighs, “You knew this was going to happen someday, Omega. They need to be integrated with the other clones for their training.”
“It’s not fair! They’re my brothers, they should get to stay with me! Can’t they still do their training and come back here everyday?”
“That is not possible. They are to be soldiers from this day on and must be treated as such.”
Omega doesn’t respond except to start crying. The normal constant babbles of the boys had completely stopped at seeing the tears of their older sister. Now, they too knew something was wrong.
“This is your chance to say any goodbyes. Be grateful I am giving it to you.”
Omega doesn’t acknowledge her warning so 99 grabs her shoulder to turn her towards him. Her arms are locked impossibly tight around Solus and Cuir, so much so that it takes him a fair amount of effort to get her to turn towards him. When she finally does, his heart breaks at the sight of tears running down her cheeks. He hated whenever any of them cried, he never felt more helpless than in those moments.
99 brushed a hand across her cheeks to wipe away her tears, “Omega, you should listen to Nala Se. You need to say goodbye to them.”
“But then I won’t ever see them again!” she manages to say through her sobs.
“Goodbye isn’t forever. You will see them again someday. It just won’t be as much as you usually do.”
It was the first and only time he had ever lied to Omega.
She sniffles and wipes at her nose, “Okay.”
Omega moves her arm from around Solus to wrap Cuir in a tight hug. She kisses his forehead and whispers a few things to him that 99 doesn’t hear, but from the look in both of their eyes, he knows it was a message of love. His arms wrap around her neck as he squishes his cheek against her shoulder.
With shaky arms, she takes Ehn into her lap next. She gently rubs his back and strokes his hair as she whispers her final goodbyes to him. He leans his head against her shoulder and closed his eyes, attempting to savor every last moment with his older sister. When she’s finished speaking, she kisses his forehead and moves him back to sit with 99.
T’ad doesn’t even wait a moment before crawling into her lap. He wraps his arms around her neck and buries his face into her chest. She wrapped her arms around his small frame and pulled him even tighter into her arms. Omega moved to whisper her goodbyes into T’ad ’s ear as she ran her fingers through his brown curls. He pulled back after a moment to let her press two kisses to his cheeks. She smiled at him as she pulled away, only to smile more as he pushed himself up to press two kisses to her cheeks as well.
99 knows that saying goodbye to Solus will be the hardest for Omega. They were the closest of them all, and maybe even the closest siblings that 99 had ever seen. Wherever Omega went, Solus was never too far behind. He was even the first of them to start walking so he could follow after Omega.
Omega turns to Solus and opens up her arms to him, to which he quicklys rushes into. He lies in her arms as she very softly rocks him. After much trial and error, it was the best way they found to help relieve his sensory overload. She continues to rock him as she reaches to lift her blanket off of the ground, wrapping it around him one last time. He nuzzles into the soft material as she delivers a kiss to the brown curls across his forehead. Delicately, she twists one of his curls around her fingers as she whispers her goodbyes to him.
After a minute, she places him on the mat in front of her where her other three brothers had been playing together.
Omega looks at each of them before clearing her throat, “I just wanted to remind you that I love you all so much. More than anything in the world, anything in the galaxy. I will always be your ori’vod and you will always be my vod’ike . We’ll see each other again someday, I promise.”
The weight of her words doesn’t fully register in the young minds of the toddlers before her, but it does for 99. Oh, does he understand it all. What it feels like to be separated from the only people in the world he’s allowed to love and have love him in return. Yes, he understands, maybe a little too well.
From the look in Omega’s eyes, he can tell she wants to say more but just can’t find the words. She seems to choke back a sob before collecting herself, an act that was mature beyond her years.
Unable to speak, she gives each of her brothers one last crushing hug before moving over to where 99 had been sitting, quietly observing the whole time. He takes her into his arms, as it’s clear she is now the one who needs comforting.
“I am proud of you, kar’ika , I know this is hard,” he says to her.
99 sees Nala Se signals to the four nanny droids behind her out of the corner of his eye. They get closer to the boys and Omega seems to notice them at the same time as the boys do. She remains still in his arms for barely a moment before she bursts out of his arms and runs to grab onto the nearest nanny droid.
“No! No, you can’t take them from me!” she screams, fresh tears already flowing down her face, “At least take me with them! I’ll be the best soldier in the entire Republic if I get to stay with them, please let me stay with them.”
99 is by her side immediately, forcibly removing her hands from the leg of the nanny droid. He keeps a gentle but firm grip on her hands as the nanny droids get closer.
Upon seeing their sister in such distress, all four boys begin to scream and cry as the nanny droids lift them off of the ground. It wasn’t unusual for the nanny droids to be around them; what was unusual was the frightened look on Omega’s face and her frantic pleas. Omega tries to reach for Solus one last time just as he tries to reach for her, to no avail.
99 grabs her and pulls her into his chest, “ Kar’ika , it’ll be alright. I’ve got you, I promise. But you have to say goodbye.”
He can feel her punching his shoulders in a desperate attempt to get him to let go of her but he only holds her tighter. She screams into his shoulder and yells something he can’t hear. He feels wetness upon his cheeks and realizes he too is crying. 99 keeps her turned away from the door as the droids take the hysterically crying toddlers away. He keeps hold of her until the doors shut and the cries of their brothers disappear.
“Omega, ner kar’ika,” he begins to rub her back, “You will see them again someday. They just have to finish their training first.”
She pulls away from his arms to look him in his face, the same face her brothers will one day share, “But they won’t even remember me. In a few months, maybe even less, they’ll forget about me. They’re too little.”
99’s heart shattered. He hadn’t even thought of that, but she was right, they were too little to be able to remember Omega for very long.
“Oh, Omega,” he takes her back into his arms, “I’m so sorry. It’ll be alright. I will always be here. I promise.”
All he can do is hold her in his arms and reassure her that everything will be okay. All he can do is gently rock her back and forth as he attempts to calm down the sobs that continue to rack her small body. All he can do is be there for her until her sobs finally subside and she falls asleep in his arms. All he can do is put her in her sleeping pod and hope that in the morning she just thinks this was all a bad dream.
He knows that despite everything he’s done, it will never be enough. He’s seen the way brothers change after losing one of their own, but losing four brothers all at once? He couldn’t bear the thought of how much heartache she was in, and would be in forever.
Before he leaves, he steals one last glance at the room around him. So full of toys and books that will never be used again. As quietly as he can, he cleans the room and moves everything out of sight. She doesn’t need to be reminded of her loss first thing in the morning.
He leaves Omega with a heavy heart, but knows that he must go check on their younger brothers. He has to make sure they are safe.
It doesn’t take him long to find out where the boys have been moved to, a set of barracks separate from the other clones, but still near enough to them that they would be trained together.
When he goes into the boys' new barracks, so far away from Omega, he finds them all put into their beds by the nanny droids, each of them deep in sleep. Upon getting closer to them, he can still see the tears that wet each of their eyelashes. He doesn’t know how the nanny droids managed to get them to sleep if they were all screaming and crying. Even he can’t do that. Only a moment later does he remember the sedative each of them are all instilled with for this exact reason.
He checks over each of them to make sure they’re not injured at all. None of them seem to have any physical injuries, but he can’t speak at all to the heartbreak they’re going through. It’s not like they understand why they’ve been separated, just that they’d been taken from their beloved sister for the first time in their lives. There’d never been a moment when she hadn’t been there for each of them.
99 checks on Solus last and is surprised to see something red clutched tightly in his small hands. He’s snuggled deep into it with his nose pressed into the fabric.
Oh.
Oh.
Omega’s baby blanket. He’d forgotten that it had still been wrapped around Solus as he’d been taken away. The blanket must still smell like his older sister, the person he loved most in the entire galaxy. And with his heightened senses, it must feel as if she’s the one wrapped around him, not her blanket.
Before 99 can even realize what’s happening, a wave of emotion stronger than those of the Kaminoan sea rushes over him. He bends over in grief and lets out quiet sobs as he falls to the icy cold floor. There was nothing he wouldn’t have done for the chance to keep them all together. He knows they deserved to stay together, to never be taken from each other’s side. All clones deserve that, and yet all they got, all they would ever have, was a life dedicated to war and a life that would end because of it. The few things that clones are given are their brothers, and now little Omega had lost every brother but him.
He remembered reading a quote from a book a long time ago: “It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.”
It wasn’t true. It couldn’t be true. Not with the amount of heartache he, his baby brothers, and his only sister were going through. There was no way it was true. Anything would have been better than this heartbreak. Who would choose to live with this much heartbreak for their rest of their lives?
Maybe someday he would be able to see the other side. Maybe someday he would see how being able to look back at the fond memories he had with Omega and her brothers had brought light to his life. Maybe someday he would be able to forgive the Kaminoans for all of the bullshit they put the only people he ever loved through. But not today.