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Rose was tossing and turning in her bed. The sound of the Tardis as it drifted in space was usually soothing and comforting. A lullaby that would make her fall asleep instantly. But not tonight. Tonight, every time she closed her eyes she could hear that voice telling her how she was going to die so soon, she could hear them telling her that the doctor was dead.
If she did manage to fall asleep she would find herself instantly back on that space ship, flying further and further away from the doctor, losing him. At last she decided that it just wouldn’t work. She needed reassurance.
Getting up she put on her slippers and drew a blanket over her night gown to ward of the chill in the hallways. She walked towards the sound of him, tinkering away on his beloved Tardis. As soon as he heard her footsteps he came from underneath his console and looked at her.
“You okay?” He asked worried, she had only been in bed for three hours.
“Would you mind holding me?”
He got up as quick as he could and walked towards her, wrapping his arms around her. “We’re safe again and together and away from that place. He’s gone, dead and gone.” He placed his hand on her cheek and stroked her hair. They were close to each other, staring into each other’s eyes. She wanted to kiss him so badly and he knew it. Which is why he let go and took a step back.
Rose stared at the ground. For a moment she felt the pain of his rejection but then her fighting spirit got the upper hand. She had enough of his vague remarks and distance. She wasn’t crazy, she knew there was something there between them.
“Doctor answer me this because I need to know and I have a right to know. Do you love me?”
He walked around the console and played with the buttons. “Rose…”
“No, I’m tired of this Doctor. If you don’t then just tell me and then I can move on.”
He thought back on the pit, that moment he had almost said it. “Does it need saying?”
“Yes Doctor, it does.”
She walked to his end of the console and grabbed his hand. “Doctor, you told me once that I could spend the rest of my life with you but that you would lose me and have to live on for thousands of years right?”
He nodded his head. “The curse of the time lords.”
“Doctor, that will happen no matter what you do. Our time together has started and it is running and it will end one day. Like it does for everyone. If you love me, admitting it or not won’t change that. It’s already there and it’s already real. We get a lot of choices in life but love isn’t one of them. Yes, the odds are very high that you’ll lose me but there are still odds that I could lose you too. But tell me this doctor, if I’m gone. Would not having acted upon it make it hurt less? Or will it only give regret?”
He stood still for what felt like eternity, just staring at the console. Just staring at anywhere that he could as long as it wasn’t her. Because he knew that if he would… at last he made up his mind and turned his head, staring at her, the next moment his hands were on both sides of her face, drawing her closer, his lips touching hers.
He pulled her close in a passionate kiss which she eagerly answered. Her hands went to his chest and clutched his shirt, the blanket she had wrapped around her fell to the ground.
The kiss felt like it lasted forever, both of them lost in each other. All the pent up longing, all those times they wanted but didn’t was poured into it.
“Does that answer your question?”
She bit her lip and smiled at him and he wanted to kiss that lip so badly again that he just went for it again.
“Some things don’t need saying, anyone can say it, but I did hope I was showing you through my actions.”
She took his hands and dragged him away from the console towards the hallways. “I don’t know Doctor, perhaps I need a bit more convincing.”