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Tommy was six when he first saw them - four red strings tied to his finger. He had just sat down for breakfast and was lifting his hand to rub his eyes when the colorful strings caught his eye. Now, he may not have known a lot - he was still a kid after all - but he knew that they had very much not been there when he went to sleep last night. He glared at Techno and Wilbur.
“Which one of you tied strings on my fingers?” The twins looked at him, and then at his hands. Neither of them spoke for a minute.
“What strings?” Wilbur asked carefully. Tommy shoved his hand into Wilbur’s face.
“These strings, dumbass! Phil, tell Wilbur to stop being stupid.” Philza turned to look at Tommy and the supposed strings. Tommy knew that Philza, being much older than all three kids, would be able to make his siblings admit to their weird prank. Philza furrowed his brows.
“Mate, do the strings lead anywhere?” Tommy frowned at this question. He couldn’t understand why that would need to be asked.
“To you, Wilbur, and Techno obviously.” Tommy couldn’t understand the expression Philza made when he answered the question. “And the one leading that way.” Tommy pointed outside. Philza walked over to Tommy and crouched next to where he was sitting.
“Tommy, I think what you’re seeing are soulmate strings.” Tommy stared at him, not understanding what he meant. “The people those strings lead to are people who will be very important to you. You’re destined to care for them, and they’re destined to care for you.”
Tommy didn’t understand most of what he was told, but he understood one important thing - his family loved him, and he loved them in turn.
Years later, when he was fourteen, Tommy followed Wilbur away from home, away to a new life. Tommy was no longer the same innocent six year old - he noticed how Philza had favored Techno, and how Wilbur had been slowly distancing himself from the rest of their family.
Wilbur told Tommy of his dreams of leaving home late one night, months before they truly left. Tommy had been lying in bed trying to sleep when he heard a door opening and the floorboards creaking past his room. Quietly, as to not wake anyone else in the house, he left his bed and followed Wilbur out of the house.
The moon was high in the sky. Wilbur sat under the stars, gazing up at the stars with an expression Tommy couldn’t place. Without looking his way, Wilbur asked Tommy to sit with him. He did.
“Don’t you ever wonder what else is out there?” Tommy stayed silent. He wasn’t used to seeing his brother like this. Wilbur looked at him.
“I want to leave this place, Tommy. I want to go on a journey, find something to do with my life.”
“Aren’t you happy with your life here?” Tommy looked down at the strings on his fingers - the two that led to Philza and Techno were slightly less vibrant than the ones that led to Wilbur and the unknown person in the distance. The difference was hardly noticeable, but Tommy had spent a long time looking at the strings when he noticed his family drifting apart. He didn’t want to lose Wilbur too.
“I want you to come with me.” Wilbur responded, ignoring Tommy’s question. Tommy looked up in surprise. He had only known one way of living his entire life and had never considered leaving his family, his soulmates. He looks down at the strings once more - at the one leading into the distance and the one connected to Wilbur, who was going to leave.
“I’ll go with you.” Wilbur smiled.
Now, they were leaving early in the morning - well before even Techno woke up, with only a note on the table to tell their family where they had gone. Tommy looked at the strings leading to the people he was leaving behind, and then he looked at the string leading to Wilbur beside him, and then the string ahead of him. He didn’t look back again.
Tommy was fourteen when he met Tubbo. By then, Wilbur and Tommy had already decided to start a country - to build a safe haven. When he first saw Tubbo and the string connecting them he asked Tubbo to help him and Wilbur. They had become fast friends - the others on the server considered them to be almost inseparable.
Tommy had questioned the concept of soulmates many times over the years, well before he and Wilbur had left their home. Since leaving, the strings leading to them had only become duller. However, after meeting Tubbo, he considered maybe they weren’t all that bad. After all, he still had two strings that were bright.
Tommy was fifteen and he was fleeing from the country he had helped build. Wilbur was beside him, telling him to run faster, terror underlining his calm words. Tommy risked one last glance back - at Schlatt, laughing maniacally, and at Tubbo, who was standing completely still, shock having taken over his body.
In Pogtopia, Tommy grew further and further from Wilbur. Wilbur was quicker to anger and distrusted everyone around him. Tommy was more worried every day. He didn’t know how to help - his brother was slipping further away from sanity every day.
The string connecting them grew duller every day.
Tommy had turned sixteen at some point, but he was unsure of when. He had spent most of his time in a ravine underground and hadn’t been able to track the days with certainty. All he knew was that he was likely sixteen by the time Techno had joined Pogtopia.
He was unsure when Wilbur reached out to Techno, but he was glad that he had someone he knew that would help him and Wilbur.
But Techno ignored him. He ignored Wilbur’s declining mental health as well.
And then he was shooting Tubbo.
And then Tubbo died.
And Techno killed Tubbo.
Tommy was still sixteen when two of his strings turned almost completely grey. Wilbur had never been further. Tommy could hardly see the resemblance to his brother, to the kid he hid under blankets with and pranked Techno by putting pink dye in his shampoo.
And Techno, well, Tommy didn’t want to think about Techno.
Soon, the final battle came. Tommy was deep in battle, fighting the withers spawned by his brother, who had comforted him when he was scared, who was supposed to always care for him.
The ground beneath him shook. The ground beneath the country he built, the memories he built, blew up.
As he was catching his balance, he noticed two of his strings leading to the same place. He looked up in time to see Philza.
He looked up in time to see Wilbur die.
Tommy heard screaming. He wasn’t quite sure if it was coming from him. He wasn’t sure of anything anymore.
Tommy was just sixteen when one of his strings severed.
Things were starting to look better for Tommy when he was seventeen. Sure, he lost one string, and two of his strings were solid grey, but he still had Tubbo, and his life could almost be considered happy.
Life had settled down after the rebuilding of L’Manburg. New citizens had moved in, the once desolate country full of life once again. Tommy had fun running around and causing trouble in the streets he called home, just like he did when he was young.
At least, he did.
Until he was exiled.
By Tubbo.
Now, Tommy lived all alone in a house far away from everyone he ever cared about. Well, almost alone.
“Hello, Tommy.” Tommy turned towards the voice. Dream had just come through the portal in full netherite armor. Tommy scowled.
“Why are you here?” Dream frowned at that.
“Now, Tommy, why would you say that to the only person who cares for you?” Tommy paused in his trek away from Dream. “Your soulmates didn’t even care about you.”
“What the fuck do you know?” Tommy was angry - angry at his soulmates for leaving him, angry at Dream for bringing them up, and angry at himself for not being good enough for them. None of his strings were a vibrant red anymore. Dream was right - his soulmates didn’t even like him.
Dream kept visiting. He kept Tommy company, he cared for Tommy more than his soulmates did. Tommy sometimes forgot why he hated Dream. Sometimes this made him hate Dream more.
He didn’t know how he felt about Dream.
Some time later, he stood on top of a pillar. Under him was Logstedshire, completely blown up by Dream. He looked at the strings on his fingers. One was severed. One led towards L’Manburg, to the country that abandoned him and hurt him time after time. Two led away from L’Manburg, towards his childhood home, towards memories of days where the only worries were scraped knees and broccoli for supper.
He followed the strings that led towards his past, and that would lead to his future.
Techno answered the door when he knocked. The surprise on his face was almost humorous. Tommy couldn’t blame him - he was in a sorry state. His clothes and hair were disheveled, and even though he wouldn’t admit it, he was sure he had started crying at some point. What probably surprised Techno more though was the fact that he hadn’t seen Tommy since the day Wilbur died.
“Mate, who’s at the door?” Philza walked up behind Techno. He froze when he saw Tommy.
An hour later, Tommy was at the kitchen table with a cup of hot chocolate in his hands. He hadn’t spoken since he got there.
He got closer to Techno and Philza over the next few weeks. He couldn’t fully forgive them for what they’ve done, but he understood that they had their own reasons for doing what they did. The strings connecting him to them grew a little brighter every day. He wondered if maybe their relationship could be fixed, if maybe they would love him once more.
Techno brought Tommy along with him on his trips to L’Manburg. Eventually, Techno told Tommy that he trusted him. He asked Tommy to help him destroy L’Manburg. His home.
“What have they ever done for you?” Techno asked.
“They don’t even care about you.” Techno said.
“Help me take revenge on them.” Techno concluded.
Tommy was unsure. L’Manburg had been his home for so long - the citizens his family. But what had they done for him? None of them had visited him in exile, and his relationship with Techno and Philza was improving every day.
Tommy agreed to Techno’s request.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t help you destroy L’Manburg.” Tommy stood next to Tubbo, next to his friends. Techno looked angry enough to kill. Tommy didn’t want to hurt Techno, but he didn’t want to hurt his friends either. Prioritizing the disks over them was a mistake, one that he decided to fix. “Tubbo, give Dream the disk.”
Tubbo hesitantly handed the disk to Dream. Dream laughed.
“Oh, you idiots!”
Tommy was still seventeen, and he was about to watch his best friend, his only soulmate who cared about him, die.
Dream had cornered them in his vault. Tommy cursed himself for being selfish enough to bring Tubbo here. Now he would die and it would be his fault. Tommy had already failed to save Wilbur, and now he would be the reason Tubbo wouldn’t grow old.
Their relationship had begun to heal after doomsday, after they were able to talk about what had happened and their feelings. The string connecting them was almost back to the color it was before doomsday, before exile, before everything.
But now, Tubbo would die. And it would be Tommy’s fault.
Suddenly, people flooded the vault. His friends, his family, people who had come to save him.
Dream was being taken to prison. As soon as Dream was out of view, Tommy and Tubbo collapsed into each other, unwilling to let the other go.
Not long after, Tommy went to visit Dream in prison. He meant to leave his past behind him and embrace the future. He meant to only be there for a few minutes.
He left the prison a week and one death later.
When Tommy saw Tubbo after being locked away, after being killed, he was laughing with Ranboo. A ring glinted on his finger, a matching one glinted on one of Ranboo’s horns.
Tubbo turned and saw Tommy.
Tommy learned that Tubbo had gotten married (for tax benefits) during the week he was gone. He seemed to be great friends with Ranboo.
“You’ve gotten married while I was gone?” While Tommy had been going through one of the worst weeks of his life, his last soulmate had moved on, apparently.
“It was kind of impulsive.” Ranboo answered. Tommy glared at him. Ranboo seemed to start sweating when he saw how Tommy was looking at him. “I’m gonna go… feed Enderchest.”
Tommy was left alone with Tubbo. They sat in silence for a bit.
“Did you replace me?” Tommy asked suddenly. He wasn’t looking at Tubbo. He didn’t want to look at his strings either.
“No, of course not.” Tubbo answered. “I could never replace you.” Tommy laughed humorlessly.
“You’ll always be important to me. You’ll always be my best friend.”
Tommy and Tubbo sat together until the sun set, sometimes in silence, sometimes talking about their relationship, about their lives, about their future.
Tommy looked at the strings on his fingers - at Wilbur, his brother who left too soon. At Techno and Philza, who stopped caring about Tommy when he stopped being who they wanted him to be. These people were supposed to care about Tommy forever.
For a while, Tommy didn’t understand the point of the strings. Three of his soulmates failed him, and his friendship with Tubbo had had plenty of struggles despite them being soulmates.
Tommy thought about Tubbo, and about Ranboo, and about the family he formed in L’Manburg. He thought about the universe and the people that were destined to love him but didn’t.
He thought about the people he loved and the future he wanted to build with them.
He decided that maybe the universe was stupid.
Someday, Tommy will heal. Someday, he would get through a day without remembering what he’s lost, the people who’ve left him, the pains he’s gone through.
Someday. But tonight, he’s content to sit with Tubbo until they grow drowsy, until they make their way inside and curl around each other while they sleep.