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Dick grinned at everyone as he stood on the table. Clapping his hands to get their attention, everyone stared at him unimpressed.
Jason, already bored, rolled his eyes at him. "Is there a reason you've called us at-" He checked his watch. "5 in the morning?"
Still beaming, Dick made sure everyone was in the room - Tim, Jason, Luka and Damian. Good.
"Bonding!" He announced happily.
Again, everyone stared at him unimpressed.
"Bonding?" Tim repeated, the bags under his prominent as ever.
Dick furrowed his eyebrows and looked at Luka. "That's what I said, wasn't it?"
Luka looked half-dead. His eyes were barely open and he nearly fell off the chair he was on when he nodded.
"Grayson, I fail to see why you have roused everyone at 5 in the morning, to 'bond,'" Damian said, impatient as ever.
Dick smiled at him again. "We're here to bond with Luka! He's new to the family, remember?"
Jason groaned, nearly crashing into the ground. "Not at 5 in the morning, Dickie. No one's even awake."
Ignoring him, Dick said brightly, "So, Luka. What's your favorite color?"
Luka's head snapped up. "Wha- oh, turquoise."
Dick squealed. "Really? Mine's blue!"
"Obviously," Jason muttered sarcastically. "It's the color of your suit."
"Speaking of suits," Luka said, "Damian. Marinette wants me to ask you why you dress up as a traffic light."
Damian sputtered, offended. "Excuse you, Couffaine. What the hell are you talking about?"
Tim raised his head. "To be fair, though, Demon-spawn, Marinette is right. You wear red, green and yellow."
"Exactly," Luka said, waking up now. "So, why? And Jason, she also wants me to ask you why you wear a 'tin can' - not my words, her words - on your head, as well."
Now it was Jason's turn to sputter. "What? I do not wear a 'tin can' on my head."
"Jay," Dick said, solemnly. "I don't know how to tell you this, but you do."
Jason glared at Dick. "You too?"
"Hey Luka," Tim said, looking away from his phone. "You will never believe what I just found."
He tilted his phone screen towards Luka, and said person froze, smiling nervously.
On Tim's phone, there was a picture of Viperion and Tim had compared that one to a picture of Luka. The results were...telling.
"Oh my god," Dick mumbled, his eyes as wide as saucers. "Is that...Luka?"
Luka shifted uncomfortably. "No?"
Jason, also looking, shot him an unimpressed look. "Yes," he said dryly. "Very convincing."
Sighing, Luka offered a - hopefully - more convincing answer. "It's just someone who looks like me?"
Damian snorted. "I highly doubt there are two people in Paris who have blue hair, Couffaine."
Dick squealed loudly, and everyone shushed him. "Oh my god," Dick was saying, "This is so cool. Luka! You've been a superhero as well!"
"Yes?"
"So we can gossip about the differences in our cities!" Dick looked so excited at the thought, that no one could bring him down from his high.
Well, no one except Damian.
"Grayson," he said, "I thought we were here to bond, not gossip."
Dick froze as if he just remembered why they were all awake at 5 - no 5:30 in the morning.
"Right!" He said, "So Luka, what's the deal between you and Marinette?"
Luka froze - did he mean it in the way Luka thought he did?
"Uh...nothing?" Luka said, hoping it would be enough.
Jason raised an eyebrow at him and Luka got the feeling that he saw right through him.
"Then why did you bring her?" Tim asked, oblivious to the look they were sharing.
That's what he meant.
"Oh," Luka said, covering up. "I meant we were friends. Just friends." He added that for a good measure.
"I don't think so," Damian said, and Luka shot Jason a panicked look because if Damian was going to say what Luka thought he was going to say, Luka was sure he would never recover.
Jason evidently decided to take pity on him and said, "You think, Demon-spawn? Didn't know you did that."
Damian glared at Jason and Luka thanked him with his eyes. "Shut up, Todd. I was going to say, I think Couffaine and Dupain-Cheng like-like each other."
Luka spoke way too soon.
Jason cringed as he saw Dick's eyes light up.
Luka looked like he wanted to die, and his face was as red as a tomato. Jason felt bad for him. He honestly tried - honest! - to stop Damian, but unfortunately, it didn't work.
"Oh. My. God." Dick looked so happy, he was practically radiating happiness. "You like Marinette?!"
Luka's head banged against the table, and he was no doubt wishing he was dead. Everyone knew how Dick enthusiastic Dick could get.
Feeling bad for the poor kid, Jason interfered, "Dick," he said weakly, but Dick ignored him asking rapid-fire questions.
"How did this happen? When did this happen? Do you actually like her? Does she like you?"
Even Tim looked slightly frightened by Dick's enthusiasm. "Dick," Tim said in an effort to get him to be quiet. "Shut up and let Luka answer."
Since everyone was looking at him expectantly, Luka feebly answered, "Um...I don't really know how it happened or when it happened. I guess, I like her and have no clue if she likes me back."
Jason winced for him. Ouch.
Damian rolled his eyes, flopped back on the sofa. "Of course she 'likes' you idiot. She came with you to Wayne Manor and made you a superhero. What more do you need?"
Luka cringed and it made Jason think there was more to this story.
He was so right.
Eventually, the topic drifted off to embarrassing stories.
Unfortunately, Tim had a ridiculous amount of them on practically everyone.
"-And then," he was saying, hardly breathing, "Dick pushed Jason off the roof!"
Luka collapsed onto the floor while Damian curled into a ball on the sofa, clutching his stomach.
Jason's lips tugged up into a grin while Dick laughed along with the others.
"Hey Timmy," he said loudly, drawing everyone's attention. "Remember the time you went skateboarding around WE because you were- mmph."
Tim had launched himself and slapped a hand over Jason's mouth. "We do not discuss that time."
Unfortunately for him, the last person he expected continued the story.
"Drake decided he would skateboard around WE because he was too 'tired' to use the energy to walk."
Luka snorted. "I guess that didn't end well."
Tim was glaring at everyone as though they had personally offended him.
"Nope," Dick said cheerfully, "It didn't."
"What happened?" Luka asked curiously.
Since Tim was crossing his arms and pouting, Jason spoke. "He was skateboarding on the floor with his phone in his hand."
He snorted as he remembered what happened.
"And he crashed into a wall."
Luka blinked as everyone waited in anticipation for his reaction. "He crashed...into a wall?" he said slowly. "How did he not see that?"
Still pouting, Tim said, "I told you guys before, I was busy."
"Sure, Timmy, sure,"
And don't tell Dick, but Jason genuinely thinks his 'bonding' idea was working.
When Alfred came to the main room of the Manor, looking for the young masters, he was not expecting the scene in front of him.
All five of them were in various states of sleep: Jason's head was hanging precariously off the edge of the sofa. Damian was curled up into a ball at Jason's feet. Tim was passed out on the table, Dick was half on the table and half off the table and Luka was quite possibly the most normal. He was sleeping on the soft carpet.
Alfred smiled to himself as he fetched them all blankets.