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Mikey liked sleeping. The only time that he can really be away from the outside world. Staying inside his room, never taking any step outside under his blanket once the morning hits, didn’t mean he was escaping from outside. It wasn’t enough for his wish to be detached as mush as possible from everything.
Sleeping was like leaving everything behind for an acceptable reason.
“Why he is not coming to play ball with us?”
“Nah, Mikey is sleeping. He can’t be bothered.”
“Hey Mikey! Its Monday! Get up already!”
“At least hold your head straight when I’m taking care of it! You are making my job hard, dammit!”
“Is Mikey-kun also gonna sleep through all lunch break? He must be exhausted. Being a gang leader and student isn’t easy.”
Mikey thought sleeping was easy way to escape from almost everything.
Everyone thought dealing with any problem is easy for Mikey. He was “The Invisible Mikey” after all. Everyone feared him. He had many many people under him. Many powerful, and as fearful as him, a right and left hands that he can rely on. But something very impulsive was raging, was boiling inside him. It was telling things that can be harmful if someone listen it well and try to apply it. But Mikey didn’t want to hurt anyone.
It all started when Mikey lost important figures in his life, one by one, his dear friends, hurting him and sliding away right from his grip. His brother, a soft but someone with big heart who managed to touch some of the people’s tender hearts, telling them how valuable they are, how important they are, losing his life. Just one mistake, even just one single mistake is enough to take that diamond from Mikey’s life.
But another person who Mikey deeply cares for says: “Don’t Mikey, don’t hurt him like you are hurt. It’s painful. But we are here.”
Mikey starts to bury things inside after that, and also trying to fight with that impulsive thing that always tick his nerves, keeping it under check, never letting it to hurt his dear people around him.
He sleeps. So that he can shut down his system even if it’s temporary. He keeps and protects his friends, his lights but he knows that they are also free to go. It hurts him when his friends leaves but still he doesn’t say anything. So he just sleeps.
The day Baji left to never come back, Mikey was shocked, too shocked but he still didn’t do anything. He let him go and he went back to sleep. Pushing all the negativity that hogging up above his head, he just slept.
Days passed, many things happened. And Baji died that day. He killed himself to protect Kazu from Mikey.
“If I kill myself and not get killed from his hands, Mikey can’t do anything to him.”
Takemitchy screamed at him, to make him realize why Baji died really.
Mikey understood. But he was getting tired. It feels like with every month, every day, he was straying away from everything and turning into a dangerous creature for every loved person he has. He didn’t want to hurt anyone.
‘Stay away from me! I’m dangerous! I will hurt you all, please’
is what he wanted to say.
But he knew no one would believe that. Draken and others would leave him be if he insist and get a bit violent on them. But Takemitchy was something else.
Mikey didn’t understand how can a person like him be so persistent about a person who actually in his life just for couple of months. He also didn’t act like a middle schooler, he talked and acted like as if he is much older than what he seems. Mikey thought, when Takemitchy stood back even after getting lots of kicks and punches on his body, his back seemed much larger than everyone else’s. Did Takemitchy ever noticed that, Mikey wondered.
Mikey thought, Takemitchy is someone who can repel his impulsive darkness, someone who can scold him like his brother, more than Draken. Because Mikey is feeling like he can’t control himself.
But can he put such a responsibility on Takemitchy like that? Can he really be selfish like that? Isn’t he just one year older than him? Isn’t he his crybaby hero?
No. Mikey can’t do that.
That's why Mikey, while he was ‘good’, he met up with everyone and said “Let’s leave a letter to future ourselves.” But those was just prompts for his plan. It was probably the first and last time that Mikey actually planned something.
That day, everyone was busy with reminiscing about the good old days, writing their letters, joking around, investing for the future date that they set up to see each other again and read the letters.
Knowing the childish persistence that Takemitchy has, Mikey left a different letter for future Takemitchy at that time. He knew Draken and others would just leave him alone to whatever life he wants to survive on, but Takemitchy was someone that can not accept everything as they are.
He memorized everything about that day. Because that day was probably the one everyone enjoyed to the fullest, shared the warmest laughs between each other. And Mikey just wanted to end it all there. He didn’t want get those memories dirty for everyone.
He disbanded the gang and said, “We are at the top, so let’s end here! Let’s immortalize everything right this day!”
After that, all left was the promised day. (Not really.)
The day that everyone but Mikey promised.
Years passed, Mikey got lost after implying the fact that “I belong to dark.” and created the most notorious gang someone can witness. After all these, no one ever tried to reach Mikey. The old Toman may had disbanded but, still, everyone saw Mikey as their leader. And in Toman, no one can dare to question the leader.
Miket thought: “It’s for the better. It’s the best for everyone.”
Years by years, Mikey became a walking darkness. The impulse he had when he was younger, got bigger and bigger, conquered every little corner inside his mind, and totally engulfed him. It became so dominant on Mikey that when that promised day came, he didn’t even give a second thought to meet with his friends from his, not the best but better days.
Sanzu told him someone was trying to get in touch with him, trying to reach him.
“It’s probably that crybaby from before, the one that smelled like garbage.”
It was Takemitchy he was speaking of, “I mean, who else could it be anyway…” he thought.
He didn’t want to meet, but Takemitchy, the persistent cry baby hero of his, does not have any little piece of giving up.
‘I didn’t want to become this cruel to you Takemitchy… You should have just let me be… Enjoy your life without any burden…’
He let Takemitchy meet with him. The so-old-not-changing hero first talked from the small matters. Mikey just listened him at behind, waiting for the real topic that Takemitchy came to talk about. He said “I’m getting married. Thought you would like to come… No. I want you to come.”
‘You aren’t going to get married, Mitchy. You simply came to make us both suffer.’
‘I tried to create the great future, why are you still seeking for me?! Stop taking more burden and just-‘
Mikey just shoot him. He didn’t count how many bullets he sent to his hero’s body, he wasn’t thinking straight.
‘You should have just left me like that.’
He was ready to end everything and he was determined to do that. Takemitchy was still resisting but Mikey knew his body can not move on more than this.
But Mikey wasn’t good at math and underestimated the sheer intractability of the Crybaby Hero.
Takemitchy was holding onto him, in the midair, right after Mikey jumped from the top of the building. His blood and tears were falling down onto Mikey’s face.
‘Leave me Mitchy…Just let me go and live your life…’
“I literally shoot you, many times.”
“I won't give up on you.
You are hurting Mikey-kun.”
‘So what? Just let me be, don’t try to help me.’
The dark fog inside Mikey’s head was clearing up. He started to feel all the pain his little body endured all those years, physically and mentally.
Mikey felt like cracking up, little by little and Takemitchy was so desperate, holding his arm tightly. There were lots of voiced coming from the below, but Mikey was only able to hear Takemitchy clearly.
“JUST SAY “PLEASE HELP ME” DAMN IT!!!”
“AND I’LL DEFINITELY COME TO SAVE YOU, MANJIROU!!”
Mikey started to see all clear again, even though he felt his tears on his eyes, mixing with the Takemitchys’. His strength was loosening, Crybaby was holding onto more even though he was bleeding. Despite everything, Mikey slid his hand to hold onto Takemitchy’s palm.
“please help me…
Takemitchy…”
Takemitchy lost his balance and started to fall, they held each other in midair, people screaming with their whole lungs. The light that cleared Mikey’s head formed a bubble like shape around those two.
‘Hey, Takemitchy. Can I be selfish in this life?’'