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It was around one or two pm, still early in the afternoon, when Mario came back to the changing rooms after training was done, and he went straight to the showers once inside. After he got dressed and got himself presentable he didn’t really planned on sticking around for long, didn’t really pay much attention to the others, but something in his surroundings felt off that day. He kind of hurried his way trough everything, something unknown having a slight press on his ribs from the outside. It was a strange feeling and he was anxious to put it off himself, but he was at loss on the how.
He got to his car quickly after he left, aching to go somewhere and not having the faintest idea where that would be. He fumbled with his stuff, looking for his phone mostly out of habit, doing everything in a slight daze he wasn’t used to. Then he saw it, once he checked twitter, it was all over the internet of course, looking back at him no matter where he clicked, taunting him in more ways than one, showing him something that could have been a part of his future too, leaving him with a bittersweet taste in his mouth.
Of course first and foremost he was genuinely happy, more than anything, happy to have him around for some more time even in such unsatisfying circumstances, at least in the same geographical boundaries, even if in reality it was 600 kilometres too far for him. But that could have been multiplied by much, it could have been made worse, and he was thankful for that.
And still, it made an uncomfortable flip in his stomach, and he involuntarily compared the situations in his mind, the one he was in two years ago, making decisions, and the one Marco was in now. How they both made their own choices, how those choices took them on different paths, still fighting to keep whole whatever was between them. No matter how he twisted it, he felt that somehow, he still came up lacking in the end. Of course it was different for them, but looking back now, he still couldn’t say it with hundred percent confidence that he made all the right decisions at the time. That couldn’t matter now though, he was where he was with no going back and he had to make the most of it, just like Marco.
His phone was still grasped in his sweaty palm and he tried hard to fight the urge to write or call Marco. What exactly could he say anyway? What was there he could say about this, at this time? He wrote dozens of things down just to quickly delete all of them. He needed to get a grip here. So in the end he gave up and wrote the only thing he thought he could say, hit send, put his phone away and started the engine.
-
It was a very nice day for Marco, all things considered, he had to admit that. Training was great, the atmosphere finally lifted for now after the weekend’s victory and everyone seemed just a little lighter, working hard to keep it that way. He caught himself smiling literally all the time during the exercises and then afterwards while signing the papers and taking the pictures, doing the interview. It came so easily on his lips, he did not have to make an effort, because he truly felt happy about this.
After he was done with everything, he left the training grounds feeling content at last. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and while he was trying to take it out, he instincively thought about the one person, he wished most to be wanting to reach him. It was silly, but it was still the shortcut his brain used the most. So when he saw the screen lit up with that name exactly, there was something in his stomach tingling no matter how much he tried to ignore it.
glad you’re staying home. xx
The unsaid ’for now’ at the end lingered in his mind though for a second, but this was enough, for now.