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“I hadn’t expected her to look so, I don’t know, violated, ” Oscar said to the voice in his head. “If I’d known, I would have shut the door fully.” Oscar could tell that Oz had something to say, but was holding his peace. That did nothing to alleviate the guilt and embarrassment within him.
Oscar rolled over on his bed, wrapping his arms around his pillow. It was late evening but Jaune and Ren were being dragged shopping with Nora because apparently they were out of eggs (a necessary ingredient for her pancakes). That left Oscar alone in his room with the sounds of team RWBY and Emerald getting ready for bed upstairs. Outside was silent save the quiet whoosh of the wind--typical of Vacuo. If not for the high probability of sand getting blown into his window, he would leave it open to let in the cool desert air. Unfortunately, with the boys’ room being on the ground floor, they didn’t get that luxury, like the girls did.
He stared out the window and looked at the night sky that was completely filled with stars. There was a halo of emptiness around the glow of the moon, where the stars’ sparkle couldn’t outshine the brilliant silver. Silver . “Ugh,” Oscar groaned, rolling over again, “I feel so awful.”
It wasn’t your fault, you know , Oz spoke. She walked into your room as I’m sure you remember.
Oscar buried his burning face into a blanket. Of course he remembered. It had only happened, what, an hour ago? Oscar had been content playing solitaire in his room with the door mostly closed. It wasn’t exactly uncommon knowledge that Oscar wore bandages around his chest and neck to cover the scars there, from two different incidents. Every couple nights or so, he would need to wash and replace the bandages else they chafe his skin. But sometimes, it just felt nice to let the scars air out a bit, when he was alone.
Which he had been alone. Hence why he hadn’t been wearing a shirt or the bandages when he sat on his bed and dealt his cards.
He was not allowed even five minutes of peace before someone poked her pretty head through his door to ask him something. Looking back on it, he realized that he should have been expecting it--there was no such thing as “peace” in their house. But it wasn’t the fact that his game got interrupted. It wasn’t the fact that he felt uncomfortable not wearing a shirt, so long as he wasn’t parading around (like Sun, bless that soul).
It was the fact that Ruby Rose had taken one look at him, swore aloud, and hit her head on the doorframe as she tried to exit too quickly.
That left Oscar feeling awful (he’d put on a shirt immediately after). He only had one guess as to why she’d reacted the way she did: the scars. No one--not even JNR or Emerald--got to see his scars often, if at all. He didn’t particularly like to look at them either. The one over his heart was about six inches in diameter in a gnarled, jagged star shape. All the skin there was stretched and uneven, and darker in color unlike the rest of the scars on his body that lightened. Frankly, it was something about himself that he deeply hated--not only because it looked disgusting, but because it reminded him of something he did not want to be reminded of.
In addition to secondhand embarrassment for Ruby’s sake, he felt guilty. He should have just closed the door. Should have just worn a shirt. Should have. Should have. Should have.
Oscar, please, Oz inserted, that kind of thinking isn’t healthy.
“I just,” Oscar said, turning again, “she’s never had a problem when Jaune or Sun walk around without a shirt. She’s used to it by now.” He heaved a sigh. “But what she’s not used to is… you know…”
Perhaps you’d best ask her about it, Oz offered. Maybe her reaction was because of something you haven’t thought of.
“Honestly, I’m not sure if I want to talk to her about it.”
Then this guilty feeling will never go away.
“But you were the one that said I had nothing to be sorry for.”
You don’t. I’m suggesting that talking to Ruby will help ease your conscience over the matter.
Oscar’s heart pounded in an all-too familiar way. He squeezed his eyes shut in an attempt to focus himself away from the feelings. He did want to talk to Ruby, but he just wasn’t sure how to go about it. Truthfully, he rarely started the conversations they did have. Ruby was always the talker and Oscar would just listen and insert where needed.
But he hated this guilty feeling. It rose in his throat and threatened to constrict his breathing entirely.
Maybe, if he was lucky enough, she would approach him about it. Assuming that was truly what he wanted…
Ruby walked back into the steamy bathroom after putting away her dirty clothes. Normally, a warm shower would have completely sealed the exhaustion in Ruby’s bones, which would then lead to a bed-flop and instant sleep. Today was not normal--not after her experience with Oscar. Weiss and Emerald had already invaded, the former brushing her silky hair and the latter putting toothpaste on her toothbrush.
“Ruby,” Weiss gasped, pausing from her hair care, “what did you do to your head?” Ruby blinked and glanced in the mirror again. Indeed, her shower had made the little goose-egg on her forehead just a bit brighter.
Ruby couldn’t bite back her groan. “It’s a reminder,” she grumbled. A tender-to-the-touch reminder that, yes, she had seen Oscar with his shirt off and reacted in the most horrible way possible. She could count the amount of times she’d cursed in her life on one hand--that had been one of them. There hadn’t been a real reason either. All she had been doing was poking her head in to ask him if he wanted to play a game, then suddenly she saw the sixteen-year-old’s impressive physique and panicked. The feeling had stayed with her vividly ever since: heat. An uncomfortable heat that didn’t disappear just because the sun went down. Embarrassment on a whole new level.
“Now you’re all red,” Weiss said, interrupting Ruby’s thoughts. “Did someone hit you over the head?”
“N-no!” Ruby stuttered, her hands coming to rub her cheeks. Why were they doing that stupid thing again? “I did it.”
“I knew you were crazy,” Emerald added after spitting out her toothpaste, “but I didn’t know you were quite that insane.”
“No--ugh,” Ruby groaned, “it was an accident. I ran into something.” Emerald snorted and Weiss rolled her eyes. “W-whatever. It wasn’t all my fault.” That was kind of a lie. “I mean, it was a knee-jerk response.”
“Your knee-jerk response was to run into a wall?” Emerald asked dryly.
“It was--! Ugh! No, there was--I had--” Ruby realized she had backed herself into a corner. Giving up her real reasons would be a death sentence.
“There’s only one person I know of that can make Ruby fluster like that,” Yang commented as she walked into the bathroom. Emerald stepped out to make room. Ruby was not a fan of the grin Yang was wearing.
“ W-what?” the girl responded, folding her arms. “You can’t know of any one person who makes me fluster--or whatever--because there isn’t one.”
“Oh, yes there is,” Yang teased. “And I absolutely know who.”
“So do I,” Weiss added.
“Same,” Emerald said.
“I think we all do,” Blake finished, coming out of her, Yang, and Nora’s room.
“N-no,” Ruby argued, her face uncomfortably hot again.
“Come on, Rubes,” Yang said, brushing her hair in the mirror alongside Weiss, “what did he do?”
“Who’s ‘ he ?’” Ruby interrogated, but regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. She knew damn well who they were talking about.
“ Do you really want me to say it?” Yang chuckled.
Ruby huffed and looked away. No, she didn’t want Yang to say it, because that would make it a tangible fact. And if it was a fact, that meant Ruby had to accept that fact. And Ruby was not ready to accept the fact that she, Miss Hero, had fallen for a boy.
“ By the way, sis,” Yang asked, setting down her hairbrush. By her tone, Ruby could tell she had dropped the teasing (thank gods). “What happened to your head?”
A series of incoherent shrieks and grunts erupted from Ruby as she stormed into the room she shared with Weiss and Emerald and slammed the door. She was not in the mood to deal with all their questions.
Because once she explained to them everything she had to Weiss, they would ask her what caused her knee-jerk response to run into a wall. Then she would have to tell them that she had poked her head in Oscar’s room to find him not wearing a shirt or bandages. His dark brown bangs had fallen in his face, hovering past his eyes as he slouched over the laid-out cards on his bed. Ruby had only been in there a second, but that’d given her enough time to observe. He was… more muscular than she had been expecting. Less like Jaune and Sun, more boyish and lean--a happy medium between an athlete and a stick. A “medium” that she had no idea she was such a fan of.
The most brutal part had been seeing those freckles, dotting all along his shoulders, down his toned outer arms, then back up to dance across his collarbone and neck. And Ruby really, really wanted to poke them. Count them, too. If only she had the time to waste an afternoon with him. Careless, but focused, on counting every single freckle and appreciating how beautiful they were. How beautiful he was. If only she could give him the attention he deserved…
Ruby stopped when she felt a smile play on her lips. No. She would not. No more thinking about him. No more thinking about freckles. No more thinking about his shoulders or neck or chest--Ruby froze as she realized something she hadn’t before. The scars. She had seen them.
A wave of guilt hit her as she came to the conclusion that Oscar probably felt very violated. He was self-conscious about them and that wasn’t news to her. She just hadn’t been thinking--or expecting--to see what she’d seen.
Oh gods, and then she’d sworn aloud and hit her head on the doorframe as she tried to exit too quickly.
Her actions could easily be misinterpreted. Knowing Oscar, he probably already had. She jumped out of bed. But how was she supposed to approach him? Just walk up and be like… oh. Yeah, that was exactly what she was going to do.
Ruby bolted out the door and back downstairs.
Sleep was evading him still, but he was catching up. His eyes were tired, his limbs were tired--it was just his emotions that had yet to fall silent. Embarrassment and guilt were apparently excellent at keeping one awake.
So were the lights.
“ Gods!” Oscar groaned as the lights of his room flicked on. He snatched up his pillow and buried his face behind it. Nope. Nu-uh. He would have at least expected Ren to stop Jaune if he tried to turn on the lights--
A weight on the end of his bed that bounced a bit. Nora. This was Nora.
“Nora,” he whined through the pillow, “please let me sleep.”
“I’m not Nora,” responded a high voice that he knew all too well, “and I’m not about to let you sleep.” Oscar hesitantly lifted the pillow and let his eyes adjust. Sure enough, Ruby was sitting there cross-legged on the end of his bed, staring at him.
“Ruby?” he asked, cursing his voice for trembling. He sat up and mirrored her position, holding the pillow in his lap.
“ I’m sorry about earlier,” she blurted out, wringing her hands.
“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left the door open.”
“ No no, not that! It wasn’t about that.”
“ Huh?”
“ I mean, I probably shouldn’t be bursting into boys’ rooms unannounced, but that’s not the issue--”
“It’s the scars, isn’t it?” After Oscar’s comment, the room felt heavy. He glared at the pillow in his lap, trying his hardest not to wilt under her gaze. “I know… they’re ugly. And I should have been wearing something to cover them so none of you accidentally… you know.” He breathed out a sigh.
Ruby was silent for a long time. So long, in fact, that Oscar dared sneak a peek up at her.
She smiled at him. “There you are,” she whispered as her silver orbs gazed into his hazel. Her hands cupped his face, forcing him to keep looking at her. Oscar’s heart pounded and his insides churned.
“ They’re not ‘ugly,’ Oscar,” she said, smiling sweetly at him in a way that could’ve melted snow. “They’re a part of you.
“And you are beautiful. ”
Oscar’s breath caught in his throat as he tried to process her statement. For some reason unbeknownst to him, his nose started to sting and his vision got misty. Ruby was still holding his face, however, and brushed away the first tear that fell with her thumb.
There were no more tears after that.
“Okay?” Ruby asked, having nothing left in her to say.
Oscar nodded and whispered a thick, “okay.”
Ruby released his face and leaned back, exhaling in relief. Oscar watched her, not quite able to smile yet, but feeling much better. He felt as if a massive weight had fallen off, leaving just an indent where it once was that would go away with time. To think all it took were a few words…
“Take your shirt off.”
Oscar nearly choked as he came crashing back to reality hard. “W-w-what?”
Ruby leaned forward and smiled at him widely. “Please? I wanna do something.”
“I--” Oscar knew that if he pressed her hard enough, he could probably get her to leave him alone. But this was Ruby and she was smiling cutely and he was kind of curious .
So he hesitantly reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. He stared intently at Ruby to gauge her reaction, but wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. Yeah, she was staring, but at what? And she was completely frozen and her cheeks were red.
Was she even breathing?
Oscar hesitantly started reaching for his shirt again. “Ruby…?” She blinked several times and finally looked up. Oscar breathed out a sigh of relief when she resumed smiling. “W-what was it you wanted to try?”
She crawled closer to him than before and knelt just to the side of him. “You can just sit there and not do anything. Well, maybe remind me what number I called out.”
“N-number?”
One of her hands came and tilted his chin to better see his neck. He then felt a deft finger poke a spot by his collarbone. “One,” she said, her eyes fixed to where her finger was. He could feel her move it slightly over as she breathed, “two.”
“Are you doing what I think you’re doing?” Oscar felt a smile tugging at his lips.
“I am counting your freckles,” she replied, still not moving her eyes. He watched her blissfully. “Now what number was I at?”
“Two.”
“Two? Oh boy.”
They had no idea how much time had passed by the time Ruby was by his spine, between his shoulder blades. He twitched when she poked a freckle there, and Ruby hesitated. She raised an eyebrow and poked the spot again. He flinched.
“S-stop that,” he hissed, though she could tell he was smiling.
Ruby bit back a laugh and poked him along his spine again, a little further down, and he jerked harder. “Hey!” he chuckled. Ruby branched out to the sides below his rib cage with little pokes. “S-stop!” He toppled over on the bed sideways, giving into laughter as Ruby tickled him.
He tried to fend her off, but was too busy laughing. Ruby was relentless, finding spots on his lower sides and even more when she got him to roll over onto his back. He squirmed and tried to grab her hands, but she was too strong and fast. Nevermind that, though…
Oscar was laughing. Like, a lot. Like, his eyes were squeezed shut and he was gasping for air because he was laughing so hard. It had Ruby so captivated that she slowed in her tickling and came to a stop. Oscar eventually caught up; his squirming subdued, though his breathing was still rapid and littered with giggles.
Ruby gazed down at him. He let out a few sighs before his breathing truly started to slow. His hazel eyes opened. One hand came to wipe away a tear that had leaked out of the corner of his eye. But it was not a sad tear; it was a tear from laughter. The hand then came and laid on his heart as he took several deep breaths through a smile that wouldn’t go away. “Ruby?” he questioned when he noticed her staring.
“I…” she sighed, “I’ve just never seen you laugh before.”
Oscar blinked several times and tilted his head, still laying on his back. “I guess our occupation doesn’t allow a lot of that, huh?”
“I like your laugh.”
Oscar stalled as the familiar heat returned. Underneath his hand--beneath the scar--he could feel his heartbeat increasing.
“Though, I hadn’t exactly planned a tickle attack.” She glanced to the side bashfully and her cheeks grew pink.
“Absolutely brutal,” Oscar teased. “How could you?”
“I can do it again.” She shifted forward.
“No!” He flinched and bit his lip to stop his inevitable laughter.
But the tickles never came. He cracked open his eyes and was met with a pair of wide silver ones, less than a foot away. Her hands had slipped and she’d fallen on top of him, just barely keeping herself up with her elbow. His eyes widened as well and his breath grew faint.
“Hi,” she breathed, eyes still wide as they flicked between his hazel ones. It was like she had forgotten how to move. Everything within her was screaming to just get up. Move away. Use her speed semblance for gods’ sake. But no matter what her mind begged, her body wouldn’t listen.
“Hi,” he responded just as weakly. He watched as Ruby’s eyes shifted to his cheeks, noticing the freckles there.
“W-what number were we at?” she whispered. Her free hand moved to his cheek and her thumb softly rubbed over the freckles.
With every small stroke of her thumb, a wave of fire went through Oscar’s veins. He could feel her breath. He could smell her strawberry shampoo as the wet tips of her hair tickled his forehead. His thoughts grew foggy and his heart pumped faster.
They had no idea what they were doing or why they were doing it. Maybe it was because they were so physically close and they’d seen one too many movies. Maybe it was because they were both so tired that the decision-making part of their brains had gone to bed. Or maybe it was the mutual desire in their hearts that neither was quite ready to accept yet.
But they were leaning in. Oscar moved the hand on his heart to tangle in the hair at the nape of her neck while she kept his face in place with the hand she had on his cheek. Through half-lidded eyes, they each spotted their target.
Noses brushed and breath danced away. There was the smallest, almost imperceptible touch--but before they could close the gap, before they could taste the other’s lips…
Nora could be heard crashing through the front door. She was screaming something about “not breaking curfew” and whatnot, with Jaune and Ren arguing behind her.
Ruby swiftly sat up, then met Oscar’s panicked eyes. They both looked at the open door of Oscar’s room. “Go,” Oscar breathed, glancing back up at Ruby.
“Yep,” she replied just before exploding into rose petals that moved out the door and up the stairs faster than Oscar had ever seen her move. He continued to stare at where she had disappeared until JNR came to the door.
“Woah, you’re still awake?” Jaune asked, observing the light switch.
“Were you just so tired you didn’t get out of bed to turn the light off?” Ren questioned. Oscar finally remembered the position he was in. It almost looked like he could have been innocently laying on his back (with his shirt off) as if he were trying to fall asleep.
“Uhm,” Oscar stuttered, desperately hoping he didn’t look as red as he felt, “n-nope. Just thinking.”
“Ooo,” Nora said, bounding into the room. She wiggled her eyebrows and grinned. “What were you thinking about?” Oscar had no answer to that.
Thankfully, Ren stepped in. “Go to bed, Nora,” he said, kissing her on the head and shoving her out the door.
Oscar continued to stare at the ceiling as his roommates got ready for bed. “Thinking” wasn’t a term he was sure he could apply to what his brain was doing. “Dreaming” was closer, but it was more vivid since he was still awake. And really, he was only “thinking” about one thing. One person. How good she made him feel inside. How deeply her words had hit him, lifting him from dark places. How he’d felt when she… when they…
Dreaming. He had to be dreaming. Or he could just ask her about it tomorrow.