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The Goose

Summary:

“Hi mom. A goose chased us and Uncle Sam found a boyfriend.” Cass said, when he got home. “It was all AJ’s fault.”

Notes:

This fic was written for Samtember 2021 day 24, for the prompt Uncle Sam.

And I've always wanted to write a Soulmate Goose fic, so here goes! <3

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

The boys played within sight. Sam sat back on the picnic blanket and watched over them.

He yawned, closing his eyes for just a moment. And found himself immediately bowled over by AJ.

“Uncle Sam! Uncle Sam! Help, it’s chasing me!”

“Who’s chasing you?” Sam asked, sleepy and concerned.

“Not who!” AJ exclaimed, pointing out towards the lake. “That!”

“Uncle Sam!” Cass called out nervously, as a bird slowly waddled its way towards him.

All of a sudden it bum-rushed him. And Cass went screaming into Sam’s arms.

“It’s a goose.” Sam said.

“It’s scary!” Cass said.

“No, it’s a goose.” Sam repeated.

It slowly started up again, waddling towards the three of them with determination in each step. Sam frowned.

“Ok, so why is it chasing you?”

“I don’t know!” Cass and AJ both said.

“Did you go near its nest?”

“No!”

“Did you feed it?” Sam asked.

For a moment, the boys were silent.

“AJ gave it the crusts from his sandwich!” Cass exclaimed.

“I am going to feed you to the bird!” AJ screamed at his brother.

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. He regretted giving Sarah the day off from the kids.

“It’ll be fine. Just ignore it.” Sam said. But by the time he finished that sentence the goose was a little closer and the boys were all the way at the far end of the blanket, leaving Sam behind as the barrier between them and the scary goose.

Great, Sam thought. That shows where he stands, he’s goose fodder.

Not that he can blame them, that thing is slowly getting closer. And even he’s starting to get a little freaked out.

Sam rolled up the blanket slowly as he backed away and then held it under his arm.

AJ shrieked as the goose puffed up its wings.

The goose honked once, twice, three times. And it spread its wings and flapped them, snapping at the air.

Sam looked behind him, only to see both boys had already taken off in a run.

“Stay where I can see you!” Sam called out, with an irritated huff, before glancing back at the goose.

“Oh, shit!” He swore, as it was right by his feet. It reached out with its long neck and nipped his knee through his pantleg.

“Ow! Get the f… away! Away with you!” Sam called out, stumbling backwards. But he wasn’t gonna fight a goose, he was above that.

It bit him again.

He was still pretty sure that he was above that.

“You… ugh… get offa me.” Sam muttered under his breath. The goose honked loudly several times and puffed up its wings again.

In a flash, it reached out to bite him again. Sam stumbled backwards as quickly as he could manage.

“Oof.”

A noise came from behind him as he toppled to the ground, onto something warm. Sam looked down, he’d fallen onto a guy! He’d fallen onto a guy with dreamy steel-blue eyes and a kind of artful stubble.

The man looked over and saw the goose, waddling towards them. And then he looked up into Sam’s deep brown eyes.

“Go.” He said, softly. He said it genuinely. “Save yourself.”

“But what about-“

“It’s alright.” The man said. And Sam frowned.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Sam said, standing up and pulling the man up with him. “We’re getting out of here, together.”

The goose immediately started nipping at his heels.

“F-fudgsicles… f-flatbread… sh-itake mushrooms.” Sam (sort of) swore.

The good looking man raised his brows and a smile spread across his face.

“Is this what you normally sound like?”

Sam grimaced. “I’m babysitting. My nephews.”

“You are?” The man said. “I don’t see any nephews.”

“They’re traitors.” Sam grumbled. “They left me to the goose.”

The goose nipped him again.

“Ow!” Sam yelped. “Little asshole goose!”

“On the count of three, we run. Ok?” The handsome man said. “One, two, three!”

They took off in a dash together, arms around each other’s shoulders for support, a wild dash until they felt that the goose could surely no longer be onto them. And then they stood there panting.

Sam looked around. The goose was nowhere to be found.

He let out a sigh of relief.

And then the other man cried out in pain. The goose had him by the ankle! It was pecking and biting so rapidly that he didn’t have time to run away. The man tripped.

Sam reached out for his hand and pulled him up, before reaching for his picnic blanket and unfurling it. He draped the thick blanket protectively over the two of them and huddled down on the grass.

“C’mon you damned goose, we surrender.” Sam hissed, as he got out his phone and texted the boys to make sure they were alright.

Apparently they were already waiting at the car. They were fine.

He felt as the goose gave a few experimental pecks at the large fuzzy lump.

Under the blanket, the man was looking at him.

“If this doesn’t work, we’re having goose stew.” Sam said, awkwardly.

And then the pecks stopped. Sam took a moment to hope that none of this had ended up online.

Eventually the man by his side breathed a sigh of relief. “I think that worked.” He said.

“Oh, thank God.” Sam said, finally relaxing. “Next time the boys say they’re scared of a goose, I’ll actually be taking them seriously.”

The man chuckled. “Never underestimate geese.” He said.

“I’ve been in the army. I’ve been in the foxholes!” Sam said, through a laugh. “But a freakin’ goose gets me hiding under a blanket!”

The man raises an eyebrow. “Literally, same boat.” He says, gesturing between the two of them. “I’d never live it down. If word got out.”

“Oh, word’s not getting out.” Sam said. “Believe me.”

“You promise?” The man said, playfully, holding out a pinky.

Sam shook pinkys. “I promise.”

“You swear?” The man teased.

“Oh, I swear.”

The man swallowed. “Kiss on it?” He whispered. It was barely audible.

Sam’s eyes went wide at the man’s cheek.

“Sorry, I was joking, forget about it. It’s just the adrenaline… And, you’re very handsome. Sorry.” The man said, his cheeks turning red as he stuttered.

“I’m such an idiot.” He said, closing his eyes.

Well, they were still under the blanket. Sam gave the man a quick kiss. “That's for saving me from the goose. And because dumbass is just my type.”

The man blinked open his eyes, with an expression like he’d just won the lottery and seen a double rainbow at the same time.

“Sam Wilson.” Sam said, holding out his hand.

“B-Bucky Barnes.” The man responded breathlessly, gripping the offered hand.

“It’s very nice to meet you, Bucky Barnes.” Sam said.

“It’s very nice to meet you, Sam Wilson.” Bucky said, still looking entirely amazed.

 

“Hi mom. A goose chased us and Uncle Sam found a boyfriend.” Cass said, when he got home. “It was all AJ’s fault.”

Notes:

If you like what I do here I am also on twitter @Writer_Monster and on tumblr where I’m writer-monster

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