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"hey, is it alright if i come over?"
it's been like this for a couple of weeks now: something would happen with emperor belos that upset hunter, he would ask to come see willow, and then would proceed to come over and just ignore the subject as if nothing ever happened. willow didn't really mind it, for as long as he was with her she knew he was safe. but the more this kept happening, the more it gnawed on her mind.
willow didn't know much about hunter's life as emperor belos' right hand man, but she was almost confident that it was not a happy one.
"of course you can." if there was one thing willow would never do, it was turn him away.
willow sat on the edge of her window sill, eyes fixated on the nighttime sky as she waited for him to arrive.
"i just want him to be okay." she said to herself. hunter would never admit it, but things were getting bad: between new bruises and scars appearing frequently that hunter would brush off as battle scars from missions, to the way willow could sense hunter becoming more and more emotionally unavailable with each visit.
hunter would never admit that -- and that's what killed her.
at first glance, hunter might present as someone who's pretentious, someone who's too good for the simple everyday stuff. she knew him better than that though: underneath that mask of conceit, was a boy who was suffering, but would never cry for help. not until it was too late, which was what willow was fearful of.
because saying it out loud would mean acknowledging that it is a problem.
willow knew she couldn't do anything about it besides give him a shoulder to lean on in his weakest moments, and that's what shoved the blade deeper into her chest. despite luz and hunter often gushing about how strong she is, willow was realistic and knew she stood no chance against emperor belos. not yet, at least.
but at the end of the day, this wasn't about willow's feelings: this was about hunter's safety, which seemed to constantly be at risk as of late.
willow snapped out of her thoughts when she heard a tap on her window: it was hunter of course, riding on top of little rascal in her staff form. opening the window, she made room for him to enter. she tried to force herself to give him a welcoming smile, but it was useless.
seeing him like that destroyed her.
"hi."
"hi."
the tension was already thick in the air without the conversation being initiated. willow excused herself in order to go downstairs and retrieve the healing coven's first aid kit. once returning to her room, she began tending to the point of injury which seemed to be a scar dangerously close to his left temple. hunter flinched a couple of times while she cleaned up the scar, but ultimately stayed silent throughout the process.
neither of them could maintain eye contact with one another, and sat in silence the entirety of it. hunter clearly sensed that willow wasn't in the mood for pretending everything was alright, and willow knew that hunter wouldn't be in the mood to hear her question him about it.
willow began picking at her arm frantically. she couldn't articulate what she was feeling in the moment: anger, sadness, frustration... all she knew was that it was best to let something out now, before her powers got the best of her.
but she knew exactly where this would go if she dared to speak on it: dismissal and deflection.
"hunter..."
"i know what you're gonna say," he stood up and turned his back to her, his body visibly becoming tense, "but i'm fine. it was just a misunderstanding-"
dismissal.
"a misunderstanding that ends in all this?!"
"don't blame him for this, it's not his fault!" hunter cried, "i told you it was from one of my missions!"
deflection.
"and we both know you're lying," willow rose from her bed and began closing the space between them, his back still turned to her with him now covering his ears, "you can't keep convincing yourself that this is okay! i know it's not something that can be overcame in a day, but you at least need to admit there's a problem."
"why?!" hunter whipped around to face willow, tears streaming down his face, "why can't you just let this go?!" willow flinched at the sudden movements.
"if everything was as fine as you try to make it seem, you wouldn't be staying here damn near every week! and you wouldn't be showing up with new marks on your body every single time!" it pained willow to witness hunter's face crumble with each sentence.
she needed to ease the blow so that hunter wouldn't get even more overwhelmed than he was right now.
"hunter, you mean so much to me," willow's voice began to waver, barely above a whisper, "i just want you to be okay. i want to go to sleep at night knowing that i don't have to worry about your safety. you deserve better than this, you have to know that."
"i-it was my fault," hunter choked between sobs, "i-i kept pushing about his curse.... i j-just wanted to help! that's all i... ever want to do... a-and... he told me to leave it alone and..."
this was always the worst part, seeing him like this. she tried to remind herself that this wasn't about her right now, but she couldn't help but start to tear up as well.
in times like this, she always opted to be his rock: his emotional crutch, keeping her own feelings distant from the situation. but it was hard not to become remorseful seeing someone who meant so much to her break down like this.
"i should go..." before willow even had a chance to reply, hunter had cut off her train of thought. at the blink of an eye, hunter started gathering his things frantically: everything was going so fast willow wasn't sure if she'd be able to grasp the moment.
"just listen to me," willow grabbed hunter's wrist, preventing him from walking any further, "we don't need to talk about it anymore. we don't even have to stay in the same room, i can sleep downstairs. but i'm not letting you go back there, not right now." hunter retracted his hand from willow's grasp.
"i can't keep stressing you out like this willow." hunter spoke through a hoarse voice. willow had a feeling she knew what was coming, causing her hands to tremble.
"you're not the one stressing me out," willow stressed, "you could never be a problem for me hunter, especially not in this situation. you're the victim here! i just want you to allow me to help you."
the word "victim" seemed to flip a switch in hunter's brain: he began shaking violently, his nails digging into the palms of his hands.
"you don't know what you're talking about!" hunter cried out, his entire demeanor becoming hostile, "stop trying to butt in to what you don't know!"
"what?" willow had always despised how high pitched her voice became once it was raised, "i just want to help you!"
"help me?! do you really think this is helping me?!" there was a flash of rage in hunter's eyes.
"i can't stand to see you like this anymore hunter!" willow shouted back, finally losing the last bit of her cool, "you don't get it, i just want better for you! don't you know much it pains me to see someone i love so much showing up to my house like this every week?"
someone i love... that was not meant to come out.
they were how she felt of course, but he wasn't meant to know that. not right now, not in a situation like this.
willow gasped, internally cursing at herself for letting those words slip out. it felt like the entire world ceased motion: they were both just standing there, mouths agape, with willow almost confident that she'd pass out from the way the heat of her body increased tenfold.
"you... love me?" hunter was struggling to look her in the eyes.
she put herself on the spot, and now there was no way getting out of it. the heat of her body had travelled from her neck to her face, and if she had a mirror nearby she knew for sure that she'd be looking at a completely reddened face.
"well... of course i do." willow knew she had said the words, but she couldn't feel herself say them. she kept her head down out of shame, as if it was bad to feel this kind of way towards someone.
she took a deep breath, and tried her best to collect herself. she averted her gaze from her feet to hunter, keeping an eye closed as if she was bracing herself for a negative response. to her surprise, she was looking at something completely different: hunter had became a blushing mess, opening and closing his mouth as if he was searching, digging desperately for the appropriate response.
the longer she watched him, she more she deprioritized being able to hear it back from him, or anything at all. all she wanted was for him to know, and to just leave it at that.
"i- willow..." before willow could form a response, letting him know that it was okay if he didn't say it back, he collapsed into her arms. even with all of the tensions of the night, she could tell that his was comforting for him, as if this was the one thing he needed in his entire life. willow buried her face into the side of hunter's neck, releasing a withheld sigh that was long overdue.
they stayed like this for a while: in each other's arms, with hunter letting out his last few sobs of the night. hunter held her tightly, almost as if loosening his grip would cause him to lose her forever. willow didn't want to say too much, and opted to rub comforting circles on his back.
"how could you love someone like me?" willow's breath hitched. the question was left lingering in the air, with the both of them still holding each other almost as if their lives depended on it.
how could she not love him? sure, he had his rough edges, but once you got past that, once you got past all of the hurt and defense mechanisms, there was a boy who still had a glimmer of hope in him to become something amazing, something separate of the life he always knew, and would do any and everything to achieve that.
even if that meant risking his own life, as scary as that was.
willow slowly pulled away from the hug, placing both of her hands on his shoulders. she took a deep breath, gathering her thoughts in the process.
here goes nothing.
"hunter," she started, "you deserve to be loved, first of all. you might not be perfect, but i've never wanted you to be. you make me happy, you've been there for me in ways i could never imagine someone being there for me before, and any time spent with you is time well spent. that'll always good enough for me."
the way his entire demeanor changed, it seemed as though hunter had never even heard those words before. as though he never heard someone tell him that it was okay to not be perfect, that his relationships didn't have to come with rules and conditions, and that his value wasn't weighed in how useful he could be to others.
hunter cupped willow's face with his hands, something that had been a norm for them regardless of their friendship status. but with the longing look in his eyes, the way his lips were slightly parted, willow knew that this time... it was different.
"can i kiss you?" hunter broke the silence with a hushed voice, their faces mere inches away from each other. willow's heart nearly ceased motion after she realized what he had asked.
"...are you sure?" it seemed like a dumb question in the moment, but willow herself never knew what it was like to be aware of someone having feelings for her like this. not that she was complaining in the slightest.
"more than ever." hunter brushed a couple of the stray hairs from willow's bangs off of her forehead, offering her one of his smiles that was typically only reserved for her: one where he looked at her as if she was the only person in the world. willow could barely recognize him: fifteen minutes ago, she never could've imagined this was the place they'd end up in.
the longer they stood like that, the less space there was between them. willow wanted to continuing closing the space, but the more she thought about it, the more her body froze. the electric sparks erupting all throughout her body still weren’t enough for her to continue inching forward. her heart was nearly beating out of her chest, the more she felt his breath creep upon her cheeks. she slowly closed her eyes anticipating the moment, until she finally felt their lips meet.
willow took a handful of his jacket and tightened her grip, as she could feel her body weakening the longer the kiss went on. she was losing herself in the sensation of his lips against her own, the feeling of his hands still cupped around her reddening cheeks. she found herself smiling in between small kisses, taking her free hand and entwining it with hunter’s.
sooner rather than what willow would’ve preferred to be later, hunter pulled himself away from the kiss. before willow could even get a word in, she became distracted with the way hunter was staring at her.
“oh…. oh wow.” it looked as if hunter was at more of a loss for words than willow herself was, considering that all he seemed capable of doing at this very moment was looking in every which direction but willow’s own eyes. she couldn’t help but giggle at how adorable he got when he was like this.
"tonight was... something else," willow stammered, still not being able to take her eyes off of hunter, "we should get some rest."
willow took the lead walking over to her bed, waving him over. sleeping in the same bed wasn't anything new for them, given that hunter would often stay overnight whenever he needed to get away from the emperor's coven for the night, but they always slept on opposite sides of the bed as per her dads' rules.
with everything that happened, with that kiss still swarming through her mind, with her entire body still vibrating, willow wasn't too confident she'd be getting much sleep tonight anyways.
hunter followed willow's lead, cautiously getting into the bed and pulling the covers over himself... on the same side of the bed. if this were any other night, willow would’ve cursed at him for thinking he had some sort of audacity in her home. yet, willow figured this would become their new norm, despite her dads' "opposite sides" rule, given the kiss and all. just the thought of it, just witnessing it in this moment, was too much for her to properly wrap her head around.
"are you feeling a bit better now?" willow hoped and prayed that picking up a more mundane conversation would help her drift off to sleep in this state.
"honestly..?" hunter quirked his eyebrow and made a questioning face, "even with everything that happened... this has probably been one of the best nights i've had in a long time."
so much for conversations.
"i.. i'm glad," willow tried to get the words out to the best of her ability but it was as if her body was on autopilot, "i'm really sorry about earlier."
"don't worry about it." another silence fell upon them after, leaving them face to face, gawking at each other. willow got a sting of jealousy because if hunter was really as nervous as she was, his face sure didn't show it: she knew for a fact her face maintained a crimson color.
"and willow?" willow noticed hunter's eyes fluttering shut, signaling that he was going to fall asleep soon.
"...yes?"
"i love you too. i meant to say that earlier." even with the kiss, hearing hunter say the words - something she was honestly not expecting to hear tonight - nearly made her heart collapse.
was she meant to respond to that? she had already said it earlier, after all. would a "thank you?" suffice? a "you too"? a "cool"?
willow never had any issues maintaining her composure and giving people the appropriate responses. but hunter, this kid who was the nephew of emperor belos, who did not so good things in the past because of his uncle, was ruining all of that.
"dammit." she hissed, slapping a hand over her mouth as soon as she said it. once again, her inner thoughts slipped into reality at the worst time possible.
"hm...?" hunter hummed, both of his eyes being closed shut. willow thanked titan that he was on the verge of knocking out, if not already passed out. hearing his soft exhales, ones that border lined actual snoring, willow couldn't help but admire him. he had always looked peaceful in his sleep, as if it was the first time he was getting proper rest in decades.
she hoped that his dreams were as harmonious as his body language let on, for his reality could be considered a nightmare on it's own.
"goodnight, hunter."