Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

As Dally’s car roared up to the old church, him slamming on the brakes and sending Johnny into the back of my seat, I immediately I noticed something was wrong.

There was a crowd of people gathered around the entrance, some adults and a bunch of little kids; probably a field trip of some sort. Johnny spoke up about what was wrong before I did.

“Hey Dally, Pony, do those people look awful worried to you too?”

It was then I realized. The church was on fire.

Dally and Johnny seemed to have noticed as well. I heard Dally whisper “Glory…” under his breath and Johnny murmur something about us being responsible for starting it.

I didn’t fully hear what he said however, as I had already thrown opened the door and jumped out, sprinting towards the flaming church at full speed. I’d never been so glad to have been part of track team in my life.

I could hear Dally loudly cussing at me to come back along with something else, but I wasn’t listening. This fire was partially my fault. I had to help however I could.

Approaching the nearest adult, I think his name was Jerry if I remember correctly, I tapped his shoulder to ask what was wrong, besides the obvious burning building, discovering that a few of the kids were missing from the group.

A sick feeling formed in my stomach, but I pushed it back. Those kids were probably wandering around somewhere behind the church messing around. They were fine. It was fine. Besides the fact everything Johnny and I had brought with us was now burning to a crisp, it was fine.

That was until a woman came up to Jerry, a terrified expression plastered on her pale face.

“Jerry, I can’t find them. I thought they were playing on the hill behind the church, but they weren’t there. I looked everywhere around the area and there’s no sign of them.”

The sick feeling was back, much stronger than before. If those kids weren’t out here, that meant they were in the church. They would burn to death if they weren’t rescued, and any firefighters that showed wouldn’t be here in time.

I glanced back towards the building, considering my options for entry. “We have to save those kids Pone.” I jumped at Johnny’s sudden voice beside me. I guess he’d followed me out of the car without me noticing. He’d heard what Jerry and that woman had said too.

I looked over at him. “I know Johnnycake, but how do you expect we get in there? That door don’t look safe at all.” His deep eyes were staring down the church, a searching look in them. Johnny then looked at me.

“How bout that window over there?” He pointed towards the side of the church, where several stained glass windows were. One of them was mostly shattered. We’d be able to fit through it with almost no problem.

“It might be kinda dangerous crawling over that glass and stuff, but it’d probably be safer.”

“Works for me.” We both ran up to the window, Johnny clambering inside first with me right behind him. As soon as I was in I was hit with a huge wave of heat that almost knocked me back off my feet.

I suddenly wished I didn’t have Dally’s jacket anymore. It was real handy for sleeping through cold nights in the church but in the middle of a fire? Not so nice.

Johnny must’ve noticed a stumbled a bit cause I felt his hand tightly grasp mine. My face got real warm, but I wasn’t sure if it was the fact Johnny had grabbed my hand or the fact he was guiding us further into the flames. Might’ve been both.

We kept walking further into the burning church. I spotted our copy of Gone With the Wind out of the corner of my eye, breaking my connection with Johnny to go grab it. Tucking it in an inner pocket of Dally’s jacket, I went back to Johnny’s side; he had his sleeve up over his mouth. Probably blocking the smoke. I didn’t blame him.

“So where are these kids we’re after?” I asked, putting my own sleeve over my mouth. Johnny shrugged. At that moment we both heard the faint sound of a kid crying. Several kids crying. Me and Johnny shared a glance and immediately set off towards where it was coming from.

Johnny and I quickly found them tucked in a back room, crying uncontrollably. I tried to talk to them, tell them it was okay, but they just kept cryin. Johnny suddenly snapped, yelling at the kids to calm down. I felt as surprised as they looked.

I’d never heard Johnny yell like that. Not even at Socs.

He blinked, pausing for a second, seemingly surprised at himself before regaining his composure. Johnny spoke again, he voice with a much softer tone now, still a bit loud to be heard over the flames.

“Don’t you worry kiddos, we’re gonna get you all out of here. Just follow us.” He turned and began walking back the way we’d came, holding a little girl’s hand.

The rest of the kids followed him except one little boy. I tried to push him along, only for the kid to bite my hand and run after the others. I sighed and followed up the rear of the group, making sure none of the kids got left behind. Flames encircled us; this building wouldn’t be up for much longer.

I coughed as a piece of ash got into my throat. I was really wishing I hadn’t smoked so much during those five days. All of those burned out weeds we left around definitely played a part in this.

All of the kids were pretty much crowded around Johnny, so I went to his side. We all walked in a brisk silence, the only sounds being the sniffing and coughing of the kids and the cracklings of fire.

I heard wood somewhere above us crack, but only I seemed to notice. Not wanting to scare Johnny or the kids, I didn’t say anything about it. It wouldn’t be an issue. We’d be out of here long before whatever just cracked fell.

I looked over at Johnny. His dark eyes were shining, not a hint of nervousness or suspicion anywhere in them. I could tell he was having the time of his life. I’ll admit, I was too; we’d never done anything this exciting back in Tulsa.

Putting my gaze back forward, I saw we were almost to the window. A quick glance revealed all the kids were still following us, although the little girl wasn’t holding Johnnycake’s hand anymore. I reached over and grabbed it instead.

Johnny smiled when I grabbed his hand, I could see it. That heat in my face was back. It vanished again when Johnny let go of my hand and lifted a child up to the window, which we’d reached by the way. Dally was just outside the frame, taking the kids from Johnny as he lifted them out. I lifted one too.

That crack noise sounded again. Dally seemed to notice. “Hurry up there you two, there ain’t much time.” Looking back, I could’ve sworn I heard fear in his voice.

I grabbed the last kid and went to the window, starting to pass them to Dally, when I heard that crack again, even louder than before. I looked up towards where the noise had come from, noticing the falling lumber before Johnny did. A piece of the ceiling had broken loose and was plummeting towards us.

Throwing the last child to Dally, who was just outside the window, I spun around to Johnny who was behind me, and grabbed his shoulders, twisting again and shoving him towards the window as hard as I could.

Johnny was halfway out the window, trying to crawl back in with Dally tugging at his arm in an attempt to haul him out. I think Johnny was yelling my name, but I couldn’t hear it over the crackling flames around me. I knew I had to run. To get away. A voice in my head was screaming

Get away from here

Get to the window

Run you idiot, RUN!

But…I couldn’t. My legs felt like lead, I couldn’t move. Dally had got Johnny out the window and was the one yelling now. The crackling grew louder. Time seemed to slow to a stop as I finally found the will to make my legs move.

Dally had his arm extended for me to grab, I tried to dash towards it. Right at that moment somethin slammed directly into me from above. A quiet yet sickening crack sounded and the feeling in my legs suddenly vanished.

For a moment I lay there, my lower half buried under rubble, flames licking at my arms and face before the adrenaline finally wore off and I realized how much pain I was actually in. I screamed in agony, faintly hearing Johnny cry my name.

My vision began to go hazy, and the last thing I saw before my world went dark was Dally jumping in through the window and running towards me.

Chapter Text

I awoke with a heavy pounding in my skull. I would’ve opened my eyes, but it was just too bright; the light made my head hurt worse. I groaned and put a hand over my eyelids, not hearing the click of the door in whatever room I was in opening. I heard something that sounded like someone pulling blinds and it was suddenly darker behind my hand.

Cracking my eyes open slowly and putting my hand down, I came to the realization I was in a hospital room. There was a nurse at the foot of the bed I was lying in, looking over something. Looked like a clipboard. It probably was.

But, why was I in a hospital room? I didn’t think I needed to be in a hospital. Then it came back to me. Windrixville. The church fire. Dally and Pony...oh glory, Dally and Pony. Were they okay? Hell, was I okay? I tried to sit up, only to collapse back down onto the hospital bed in pain.

My right arm hurt something awful, and that same side of my chest hurt just as bad. Looking down at my arm, it was wrapped in a cast. I had a broken arm. No wonder it hurt.

The nurse must’ve seen what I did, cause she came to my side. “Careful there honey, don’t be gettin too excited. You’ve got a couple fractured ribs along with that broken arm of yours.” She spoke in a gentle southern accent, and her nametag read ‘Clara”. “Too much excitement will make those fractures worse, and trust me, you ain’t gonna want that.”

I nodded and lay back against the pillow, sighing. My throat was dry and my head still hurt. I quietly asked Clara for a glass of water. She nodded and put the clipboard down, leaving the room. I listened to her footsteps go down the hall until I couldn’t hear them anymore.

The only sound in the room now was the beeping of whatever machine I was hooked to. I closed my eyes, tuning out the beeping and the pain in my arm. It was strange to think that less than 12 hours ago, I was laying with my head in Pony’s lap. He was reading Gone With The Wind out loud to burn time as we waited for Dally to come find us. Everything was okay then. Okay as it could be considering the fact we were in hiding. I’d give anything to go back to that.

Clara came back in at that moment holding a glass of water. I opened my eyes and sat up, taking the glass from her as she came to my side. I gulped it down almost immediately. It tasted heavenly after days of drinking the stale water from that church tap.

The nurse went back to the foot of the hospital bed, picking up the clipboard again. She spoke suddenly. “There’s someone here who wants to see you. Says he knows you.”

A slight worry appeared in my stomach. What if it was my parents? My throat went dry again at the thought of seeing them right now. With a shaky voice I somehow managed to choke out, “Who is it…?”

“I believe he said his name was Two something. Two-Bits? It was something strange.” It was Two-Bit. That must mean the gang is here. Of course. I mentally smacked myself for thinking otherwise. Stupid anxiety. “L-let him come in. He’s my friend.”

The nurse nodded in acknowledgment of my request and left the room, leaving the door partially open. Less than a minute later, Two-Bit came racing through the door, causing it to slam against the wall. “Johnnycake!” I set my cup down on the bedside table and smiled at him. “Hey Two!”

He plopped down on the bed near my feet, looking at me with his dancing grey eyes. “Glad to see you’re okay kiddo! You and Pone gave us a real scare when y’all vanished like that.”

Ponyboy.

I asked the question that’d been lingering in my brain since I’d woke up. “Is Ponyboy okay?” The light in Two-Bit’s eyes dulled. “He’s...well he’s not doing too well right now. From what I’ve heard from Soda and Dar, he’s in critical condition. Broke his back or somethin.”

My breath caught and I suddenly wished I had more water. Critical condition? Wasn’t that just a fancy way of saying that someone was gonna die?

Glory, Pony was gonna die and it was all my fault...my fault for dragging a kid along with me even though he was innocent. I had killed that soc, not him.

Ponyboy had never done a thing wrong in his life and now he was on death's doorstep.

The room suddenly began spinning. I felt like I was gonna be sick. Pony had a loving family, he was smart, and was barely 14. He didn’t deserve to die. If anything, I did. I should’ve been the one to break my back, I should be the one dying-

I felt the presence of Two-Bit’s hand on my shoulder. “You okay there Johnny? You look like you’re about to start cryin.” His eyes were full of worry when I looked up at him. I opened my mouth to try and speak, but couldn’t form any words past the lump that’d lodged itself in my throat.

Pony was dying and it was all my fault.

“I-I’m okay Two...I just need s’more water…” I choked out, grabbing the cup. A couple tears slipped loose but I wiped them away with my good hand before Two-Bit noticed.

He stood up. “You want me to go get some more for you kiddo?” “Yeah…” I handed him the cup and he left the room. I listened to the beeping of the heart monitor I was apparently hooked to, waiting for Two-Bit to come back. A few seconds later he ran in with an overflowing cup and passed it to me. He sat down on the bed again as I sipped from it. “So Johnny, you wanna go see the gang?”

“Sounds nice I guess. I’ve missed them.”

The nurse came back again at that time; Two-Bit got up and spoke to her for a second. She came over to me and pulled the heart monitor things off my chest, giving me a quick reminder to be careful walking around due to the bruised ribs. I was fine with being careful. Breathing in too quickly hurt.

Two-Bit barely gave me time to pull some socks on before he was dragging me out of the room to where he said the gang was waiting. Sure enough, we got to a waiting area and the whole gang was there, save for Dally and Pony - and Steve, who had apparently been grounded by his old man.

Everyone seemed real happy to see me. I had to warn all of them, even Darry, that I wasn’t really up to rib-crushing hugs considering my ribs were already injured. They backed off after that, but still kept fussing over me. Mostly asking about the murder. I didn’t like that word. Murder.

Besides the gang, there were a bunch of reporters scattered around. Apparently they wanted to talk to me about my crime and the church and saving those kids and all that.

Speaking of the kids, that Jerry Wood guy was there to thank me and Ponyboy for saving those kids. Said they would’ve died if we hadn’t done that. It was ironic to me that we’d saved those kid’s lives, and now look at Pony.

Anyhow, back to the reporters, Soda was keeping me mostly guarded from them and boy was I grateful. I barely had enough energy to keep my head up, much less answer the ten thousand questions they all seemed to have for me. I remember wondering why they even bothered asking me.

They were just so loud, and should’ve figured I was in no state to be discussing what had happened. Not that I wanted to at the moment. Or ever again for that matter.

After about an hour, Darry managed to get it through those reporters' heads that I wasn’t gonna be talkin to them anytime soon, and they left. It’s amazing how quiet it got once they were all gone. Darry came and sat down on the other side of Soda; Two-Bit was across the room annoying some nurse. I didn’t really care, I was just tired. And scared. For Pony and his brothers. For myself. For our gang as a whole.

I laid my head against Soda and he wrapped his arm around me, gently rubbing my shoulder. I fell asleep to the sound of hospital machines and quiet footsteps.

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I felt like I’d only been asleep a minute when I felt someone shaking my shoulder. It was Soda, trying to wake me up. “Johnnycake. Johnny. Wake up baby.” I hummed in response, looking up at Soda. “Wha?”

His dark eyes were shining. “Darry just spoke to a doctor, he said we can see Ponyboy now! Well, actually the doc just said family could see him, but I’m sure we can still get you in too.”

Soda got up, I yawned and stood as well. It’d be nice to see Pony, though all I wanted to do right now was take a nap. Darry gathered up everyone and we all walked together towards the room Pony was in. I paused at a mirror. I was a mess.

My face was still covered in ash and any exposed skin on me was bruised or burnt. Not severely, but I still had quite a few burns. I wasn’t surprised. Wiping a hand across my cheek, I left the mirror and caught up with everyone.

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All five of us weren't allowed in to see Pony, just Darry and Soda cause they were family, so Two and I went to see Dally. He was in a room just down the hall. From what the gang had told me, Dally had gotten his arm real burned up from running back into the church to grab Pony from underneath that pile a rubble.

I felt a bit bad about that. He wouldn’t have gotten his arm burned if Pony and I hadn’t decided to run into a burning building. Dally told us to come back and everything, but we didn’t listen. Now he and I were hurt and Pony was dying. I made a mental note to listen to what the gang tells me from now on.

Two-Bit was rambling off about some time he’d threatened a soc with a rusty screwdriver he’d found, but I was just half-listening. I was still exhausted. I really needed a nap right about now, getting sleep hadn’t really been an easy thing in the church. It had been really cold and my guilt kept me up, even with Pony snuggled into me.

We soon got to the room Dal was supposed to be in and I knocked on the door. Two-Bit just barged in when we didn’t get an answer. Dally, almost not-surprisingly, wasn’t in there. But not for long. The blonde hood came in the room right behind us. I didn’t notice him, but next thing I knew I’d been scooped off my feet by Dally in a tight hug and was being spun around. I think my foot might’ve hit something. I don’t remember.

“Good lord Dallas, careful with the kid!” I heard Two-Bit exclaim. “He’s not exactly in condition for you to be throwin him across the room!” “I also have a broken arm-” I managed to squeak through how tight Dally was holding me.

Dally immediately set me down and ruffled my hair. “Sorry Johnnycake, didn’t mean to be so rough. I’m just real glad you’re okay is all. I got worried when you passed out on me and wouldn’t wake up.” His face was shining, I could tell he was glad to see me.

The look he was giving me reminded me of the look I’d see Soda and Darry giving Pony sometimes. I wondered if Dally thought of me as his kid brother. He sure fussed over me like he did. Like when he went off on me for wanting to turn myself in, then apologized for being harsh when I ‘already got enough of that back at home’.

I wondered if turning myself in would’ve changed anything. Or would me and Pony still have ended up in that church?

Smiling back at Dally, I looked him over. His right arm was bandaged, and his face was just as soot-covered as mine was. He seemed to have discarded his hospital gown. Somehow his hair was still vibrant white-blonde.

Two-Bit and Dallas started talking about something and I sat down in a chair, letting my gaze drift to the window. The sun was setting and boy was it gorgeous. Pony would’ve loved it, I just know it. He dug sunsets. He’d only ever told me, Soda and that soc girl, Cherry, how much he loved sunsets. And I agreed with him. They were a sight to behold. I rested my chin on my palm, watching as clouds laced the orange and pink sky.

I must’ve been dozing off or somethin cause Dal was suddenly shaking my shoulder. “You still awake over there Johnnycake?” I nodded. “Yeah, just feelin a bit tired is all.”

Dallas was grinning one of his mischievous grins when I turned my head to look at him. “Well kiddo, I was thinking of going out to see the gang, maybe raise some hell while I’m at it, so why don’t you take a quick nap in my hospital bed?” The idea didn’t sound half bad honestly. Plus Two-Bit seemed to be into Dally’s ‘raising hell’ idea, so I nodded.

“Works for me.”

Dal ruffled my still messy hair good-naturedly and jogged out after Two-Bit, closing the door behind him. I got off my chair and climbed up onto the bed; it felt weirdly more comfortable than the one in my hospital room.

Laying down in a way that wouldn’t disturb my arm or ribs, I let myself drift, still watching the sunset and being thankful there were no beeping machines anywhere in Dally’s hospital room. Just calm, sweet silence. I was fast asleep not five minutes later.

Chapter Text

The car ride up to the Windrixville hospital seemed to take forever. I’d spilled to the gang that Dally knew where Pony and Johnny were after he took my letter up, and ever since, we’d all been waitin anxiously for news on their wellbeing. The news did arrive, but not really how any of us had expected it.

All of us ‘cept for Steve were sitting in the living room of our house when the phone rang. Steve was in trouble with his old man for somethin and was only allowed to leave his house for work. Anyways, Darry picked up the phone immediately, and while I couldn’t hear what was on the other side, from the way Darry’s face darkened it seemed important.

He said something to whoever was calling about Ponyboy, and a place called Windrixville. The second he put the phone down he was running for his jacket, telling the rest of us to “Grab your things, we’re going to Windrixville”. Two-Bit and I had questioned why, and the only thing Darry told us was that Pony was in a hospital up there.

I had frozen at the news. My baby brother was in the hospital? Two-Bit had snapped me out of my daze, we all piled into Darry’s ford, and now here we were.

We’d all been a little confused at the fact we were heading to Windrixville when Dallas had told us the boys ran for Texas, but the point was made that the Texas thing had been a fib made by Dally to keep Pony and Johnny from getting caught. I respected him for that, making sure they were safe from the fuzz. ‘Specially cause they’d definitely stick Pony in a boy’s home if he was stuck in the cooler for being mixed up in a murder. Probably me too.

Anyhow, the moment Darry had parked, we’d all piled out of the car and run up to the entrance, me and Darry leading. A quick talk with the lady at the front desk later, we were upstairs in a waiting room. A tense silence was hanging around us until Two-Bit decided he was bored or somethin and wandered off.

A nurse came in asking for Darry. He got up and went over to her, and they started talking in hushed voices. Meaning the silence was stuck over me. A few reporters had wandered in, probably looking for my brother and Johnny, but I just ignored them. Usually I’d be all up in whatever they had to ask but with not knowing if Pony was okay...I just wasn’t up to it.

Crossing my arms to try and look unapproachable, something I’d picked up from Dallas, I started bouncing my leg. It was a nervous habit of mine and I’d be lying out of my ears if I said I wasn’t nervous right about now. Darry finished up talking to the nurse and came back to sit by me.

Now the silence was just between us, but something about it felt different. Darry had his head in his hands. He blamed himself for this, I knew it, he’d told me. All these things about how he was always too harsh or shouldn’t have hit Pony. I felt bad. None of this was his fault, it was the fault of those socs that jumped Pone and Johnny that night.

I sighed, watching the nurse as she left the waiting room. As much as I knew neither of us really wanted to talk about it, I had to know about Pony. The stress was just about to kill me.

“What did that nurse want? Say anything bout Ponyboy?”

When Darry looked up at me he had a pained expression in his eyes. His usually gruff voice was a shaky whisper. “She said he’s in critical condition. He busted his back. Says he’s in shock too. They don’t know if he’ll be okay…”

My stomach suddenly felt like ice. Pony might die...no, he couldn’t. We couldn’t lose him too, not so soon after mom and dad. I wrapped an arm around Darry, trying to comfort him. I could tell he was thinkin the same thing I was, he just didn’t wanna show it. Darry thought he had to be tough cause he was the oldest brother.

Usually socs don’t bother me all too much- if they wanted to be assholes to us greases, whatever, we could all handle em, but that night was just too far. Trying to drown a kid is too damn far. I remembered bitterly a time when I thought what they did to Johnny was too far.

Not to say it wasn’t bad, it really was terrible, it just...I don’t really know. It just bothered me real bad that it was always the youngest ones who always got hurt. Why couldn’t those damn socs go after me or Steve, or Two-Bit, hell even Dallas or Darry. Just not Pony and Johnny. They didn’t deserve it. No one did, but especially not them.

Speaking of Johnny, Two-Bit came back a few minutes later with him in tow. Poor kid looked so exhausted I thought he might faint, and his face was all covered in ash.

Darry and I both jumped up to give him a hug, but he held up an arm in a cast and told us to back off with the bear hugs since he had a couple bruised ribs and didn’t wanna make them any worse. I still gently side-hugged him on the opposite side of where he was injured. Darry was fussing over him like a mother hen, which earned a chuckle from me. He’d always had that dad-ness to him, even more so nowadays seemed like.

Those reporters that were still lingering about that we thought would be gone by now piped up again when they noticed Johnny. I guess it wasn’t surprising, the kid had killed a soc earlier this week, no matter if it was self-defense or not. But who needed the reporters to ask him questions when Two-Bit was there; he was askin Johnny question after question about the night of that murder faster than any car I’d seen at a drag race. I’ll admit I had questions about it but Two was just going nuts with em. We got him to lay off though since Johnny looked real uncomfortable discussing it.

I didn’t blame him honestly. I had lingering guilt from breaking one of Dad’s coffee mugs years ago, I could barely imagine the guilt that must come from a fresh murder, especially one he hadn’t wanted to commit. Johnny’d answered that question by the way. Apparently he had only stabbed that soc cause he was scared they’d kill Pony. Johnny hadn’t even been aiming to kill, just jab that soc in the arm to make em let go of Pony.

I looked Johnny over. His hair was shorter than he normally wore it, and it was jagged, like he’d cut it himself. The hospital gown he was wearing nearly swallowed him whole. And even for how tan he was, he looked real pale, which made his scar extra apparent along with a buncha other bruises and burns.

Johnny still looked like he was gonna faint, so Darry spoke to those reporters and got em to leave, saying he wasn’t up to it currently. I sat back down and Johnny sat too, leaning against my shoulder. I put my arm around him and rubbed his shoulder like I’d do to Pony sometimes when he’d had a nightmare. It seemed to work since he was asleep almost immediately.

We all just sat in silence again after that. Johnny sleeping on my shoulder made me realize how tired I was myself. Darry sat down in the chair on my other side and I leaned against him, trying to keep my shoulder up so Johnny could stay asleep. I really didn’t wanna disturb the kid. But glory if it wasn’t hard to stay awake...

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I don’t remember falling asleep, but I woke up suddenly, noticing Darry was missing from my side, talking to a nurse again. My brain rushed to worse case scenario until Dar turned and walked over to me with a slightly brighter look to his face than he’d had before. He sat back down next to me, and Johnny who was still asleep.

“What’s up with that nurse, Dar? Anything bout Ponyboy?” He stood up again, wringing his hands. “She said he’s finally stabilized - sort of. Enough that we can go see him if we want. Only family though, so Keith and Johnny can’t come with. And before you ask, no, Pony hasn’t woken up yet.”

That news disheartened me a little, but I was excited to see Pony, even if he wasn’t awake. I just wanted to see my baby brother again. I shook Johnny awake, getting to my feet and following after Darry. He’d found Two-Bit, and Johnny was half-asleep at my side, but standing, so we all headed off down the hall. I didn’t know exactly where we were going, but it was a long walk.

Darry stopped in front of a door and knocked on it. A curly-haired nurse opened it and stepped out. “Hello, family of Ponyboy Curtis I assume?” I came up beside Darry, answering before he could.

“Yeah! Me and him are his big brothers-” I gestured to Darry, who nodded. “And those two are just close friends, but they’re so close they might as well be his brothers.” I finished, pointing back to Johnny and Two.

The nurse’s expression got a bit sadder. “I’m terribly sorry, but as close as they might be, only immediate family members are allowed in right now. It’s protocol. Perhaps you can visit him on a later date if he gets somewhat better.”

If. I didn’t like the sound of ‘if’. She was probably just supposed to say that cause Pony was even here. He couldn’t be dying. The nurse opened the door and gestured me and Darry into the room then went in herself. It looked real dark in there.

Two-Bit and Johnny went off somewhere else, probably to go find Dallas. I kinda wished I coulda gone to find him too. I wanted to talk to him, ‘specially since we hadn’t really spoken since I’d cornered him earlier in the week and demanded to know where Ponyboy was after finding his sweatshirt at Buck’s. But there’d be time to see him later.

The nurse lady was at a counter looking over some papers when me and Darry walked in. “Sorry again about your friends, we just don’t want him under any unnecessary stress, especially because of his current condition.”

“It’s alright, it’s not a big issue. Those two would give him stress even if they are his best friends.” I had to chuckle at Darry’s remark. “So where is he in here?”

“Just behind the curtain. For more privacy.” She started to leave, before turning back. “My name is Susan by the way. Call for me if he wakes up or if either of you need anything.”

I walked ahead of my brother, pulling back the curtain. And there he was. Laying face-down on a hospital bed and hooked to too many machines, was Ponyboy.

He was so…still. And he looked so small. I could hardly believe, no, I didn’t want to believe I was looking at Pony. This boy who might be dying wasn’t my baby brother right? He was back in Tulsa, at home or at the library. Or wherever Dallas had sent him and Johnnycake to hide out. Not here…

I looked over at Darry. He seemed to be having the same thought process. His ice blue eyes didn’t look icy, they had a strange look to them. I slowly moved to Pony’s side. His arms and neck were covered in burns and - his hair was bleached blonde. I had to resist the urge to laugh; blonde? Glory, he almost looked like Dally.

Carefully sitting down on the edge of the bed, I grabbed Pony’s hand. It was cold and limp, and that scared me. The machines he was hooked to said he was alive, but he didn’t feel or look it. I looked back at Darry again, he looked terrified. I was about to get up to stand by him, till I felt something grip my hand. Ponyboy. Ponyboy grabbed my hand.

“Darry...Pony...my hand-” My big brother was by my side in a second. “What about your hand?”

“He grabbed it.”

Both of us were silent, just staring at the hand loosely gripping mine. This kinda thing was good right? Him holding me? That meant he was waking up, which means he’d be okay? Was that mirror there below his bed that showed his face there earlier? How didn’t I notice that?

A quiet voice pulled me from my thoughts. “Hey…Soda…?” Pony’s reflection was looking at me with burnt out lookin green-grey eyes. “Am I in a hospital?” I looked back at him, a small smile reaching my face. “Hey baby. And yeah, you are Pony. You are.”

“Everything hurts……am I dying..?”

I didn’t really wanna say anything, so I looked over at Darry, who also seemed like he didn’t wanna say anything, so it stayed silent till I could make a decent response. “…….I dunno baby…I just dunno….”

Pony shifted a titch, releasing my hand and grunting, probably pain. “….Could you…please leave for a sec? I wanna talk to Dar..”

“Alright Pony…”

I left the room leaving Darry and Pony alone and wandered back into the waiting room, truthfully in a slight daze. Two-Bit was there and he had Dally with him now. I was about to ask where Johnny had gotten to when Two suddenly noticed I was back and jumped up from his seat and got right in my face. “So how’s Ponyboy? He doing okay?”

“Not too hot…got his back busted.” I felt like I was in a daze again, remembering how Pony had looked laying there. It must’ve shown on my face cause Two-Bit backed off. “Ah, okay. Guess that fire wasn’t too nice to him.” Leave it to him to crack jokes in a situation like this.

Dally piped up. “Hell it didn't, kid was limp as a noodle when I pulled him out of there. Wouldn’t wake up worth anything either. He was out cold when I grabbed him and stayed out all the way to the hospital.”

“You got him out of that church? And stayed with him?”

“Yeah? Whadya think, I waited for those firefighters to show up and save him? Psht, if I’d done that, Ponyboy’d be six feet under right now. They showed up after the ambulances did.” He chuckled darkly, going silent for a moment before speaking again. His voice was a bit softer.

“And yeah, I stayed with him. Since Johnny went in a different ambulance of his own, I wanted to make sure Pone had at least one familiar face with him if he woke up.” He shoved his hands in the pockets of his slightly burnt jacket.

More silence. I really didn’t like how much silence kept happening. Two-Bit piped up with some smart remark that Darry elbowed him for which was followed by Two pretending to be hurt, but I honestly didn’t hear it. I was focused on Dally. He’d really saved my kid brother’s life, hadn’t he? It was kinda difficult to imagine Dallas Winston saving someone’s life, but he had. And I was glad he did.

Dally noticed I was looking at him and we just kinda stared at each other for a sec. He started to say somethin but I moved forward before he could and hugged him. It just felt right, ya know? Dal sorta stiffened at my hugging him but didn’t seem to mind. “Thank you Dal- thank you so much for saving Ponyboy…”

“You’re welcome, but that doesn’t answer Two-Bit’s question. How’s the kid? I didn’t hear what you told Two.” I smiled bitterly, pushing away a bit. “Pone didn’t get quite as lucky as you and Johnnycake. Whatever happened in that fire busted his back out. He’s not doing too hot at the moment.”

That damn silence was back. Again. I quickly changed the subject. “So where’s Johnny at? Didja lose him somewhere?”

Dallas shook his head, a few strands of white-blonde hair falling into his eyes that he quickly pushed back. “Nah, he’s back in my hospital room sleepin. Kid looked plain exhausted, he was dozing off just sitting there talking to me and Two.”

Speak of the devil, Two-Bit was suddenly next to us. “That means there’s plenty of time to sit around and chat right? There are some things about all this that I need filling in on. Maybe cause some problems too.” I shoved him. “We can’t be gettin’ kicked from this place while Pony is still here. He needs us.”

Two had one of his mischievous grins. “So after Pony’s better, I can try and get kicked outta here?” I could hear Darry groan behind me and snorted. “Sure bud, knock yourself out. Until then, why don’t we all go do that chatting thing you mentioned.

"I have a few things I wanna know too.”