Archive of Our Own

There was something to be said for returning to his hometown. Loki had avoided it for years, not wanting to be reminded of some of his more painful memories; his adoption, his tormentors, his difficulties of being an alternative gay teenager with a foreign accent in an American town.

He was older now, well-travelled and a successful playwright. It didn’t mean he couldn’t handle more than a few hours at the family home before he was in desperate need of a bar.

Loki had left the town the day after he'd turned eighteen. It had been ten years and very little had changed. The same bar still sat in the same place with the same management. What Loki didn’t expect however, was a particular figure slumped over a barstool nursing a scotch.

Loki stilled just inside the door, looking the man up and down and confirming he wasn’t wrong. The man was only six years older than him, but age meant nothing when you were a genius who graduated at the top of your class at a young age. The man could have done anything, gone anywhere, but for some reason he had chosen here.

Loki hesitated for only a moment before he stepped closer and cautiously asked, “Mr Stark?”

The man turned, and unlike the usual bright, cheerful, mischievous features Loki had looked up at from a classroom desk—and had fantasised about for the entire year he was in his class—this man was drained and morose.

Yet, when he recognised him, a spark of his usual fire reappeared.

“Loki Odinson?” He gave a huff of a laugh. “Wow, that’s a blast from the past.”

“Only a decade,” Loki answered with a half-smile.

Stark looked him up and down, but it wasn’t appraising, merely curious. “You sprouted.”

Loki snorted. “That’s one word for it, yes. But I do recall being taller than you even when I was a teenager.”

Stark look amused, but only for a moment before the good humour faded and his eyes turned from Loki to the drink in his hand. The spark that had ignited within him seemed snuffed out. Loki didn’t understand it, nor did he like it.

Anthony Stark had been the only teacher Loki liked; he was sarcastic and witty. He liked anyone who argued his points and even though he taught science and technology, he never once dismissed the other subjects. He told his students they could do anything if they put their minds to it. He wrote on his board on more than one occasion: “If someone says you can’t do what you love, take it as a challenge and prove them wrong.”

What had made him change?

Loki wavered for only a moment before taking the seat beside his former teacher. Stark glanced at him, and something wry entered his eyes.

“That’s right. You always were the kid with a stubborn streak.”

“Something you possess as well,” Loki countered.

Yet, his words made Stark close his eyes as if he’d been struck a blow. He slumped further against the bar. He looked so depressed and sorrowful. Loki didn’t know what was wrong, but he wanted to fix it.

Stark had been his favourite teacher, his teenage crush, and the person who had encouraged him more than he ever knew. Stark told people to be true to themselves, to cheerfully flip off the world and to fight for what you believed in—seeing him like this wasn’t right.

“Mr Stark?” Loki asked, still unsure what else to call the man who wasn’t a teacher, but wasn’t a friend.

The other man sighed. “You must be the only person in town who doesn’t know. Everyone else knows to leave me the hell alone or buy me a drink.” Loki frowned, trying to think of anything that had happened – but then, Stark explained, “I…” his voice hitched, “had a bad break up.”

Sympathy flooded Loki; he knew what that was like. “I’m sorry.”

Stark scoffed, but it didn’t seem to be directed at Loki, but rather the world at large.

“Three years, and there it is, ‘sorry, I love someone else’.” Stark closed his eyes. “And you know,” he laughed bitterly, “if Pepper could have picked a better day than our fucking wedding, that would have been nice.”

Loki sucked in a sharp breath. “Shit.”

He knew Pepper Potts. She’d been Vice Principal at the school and while there had always been rumours about the two of them, Loki had forcibly ignored them. He’d crushed so hard on Anthony Stark and his jealousy and envy had made him hate the sight of the lithe, beautiful red-head. It didn’t matter that he didn’t have a chance with the man (or that half the student body was infatuated with the handsome, young teacher) he’d been youthful and starry-eyed.

Now, he knew better. Loki had been in his share of good and bad relationships, but none of them had ever wounded him as badly as Miss Potts had obviously hurt Mr Stark.

Loki didn’t know what to say, and in the end, he waved for the bartender and ordered himself and Stark a drink. The other man seemed almost amused when they were put in front of them.

“I’m sure there’s something in the rulebook about this.”

“About what?”

“Letting a student buy me liquor.”

“Former student,” Loki corrected. “I’m older than you were when you were teaching me.”

The tiny smile caught at Stark’s mouth again but didn’t quite reach his eyes. “I guess we don’t need the formalities then.”

It was all the permission he needed.

Loki smirked. “Anthony then?”

The other man shook his head, but his smile was a little bit wider.

“Sure, why the hell not. Welcome back to this hellhole of a town.”

Stark-Anthony held up his scotch and Loki took up his gin and tonic. Their glasses came together with a soft clink.

“Thank you for the hospitable welcome,” Loki drawled.

Anthony gave a small laugh and Loki considered it a victory. He watched the other man drink from the corner of his eye as he sipped from his own glass.

Loki wouldn’t say he’d spent the last ten years holding a candle for a teacher, because that was ridiculous, but he could admit that he’d thought about Anthony numerous times. He’d always pictured him full of boundless energy and unbridled confidence. Maybe, in the back of his mind, he’d hoped to run into the teacher who’d done so much for him without knowing.

Loki wasn’t a sentimental or selfless person, but Anthony was different somehow. He didn’t owe the man anything, but it didn’t sit right with Loki to leave him when he was like this.

Anthony had given him a lifeline a decade ago; he’d helped Loki crawl out of a pit of anger, depression and confusion. Loki was now in a position to respond in kind, and as Anthony had already pointed out; Loki had a stubborn side that wouldn’t be easily dissuaded.

He’d help Anthony Stark, no matter how long it took.

Loki didn’t get drunk, but Anthony did.

Loki had watched with growing concern as the man put back alcohol like it was water. He also started to talk; explaining exactly what had occurred to leave him dumped at the altar. It turned out that Miss Potts had been snowed in at a conference a month prior to the wedding. A fellow colleague Happy Hogan had been there with her.

Something had happened during that time and she’d realised she’d been in love with him. Anthony got a little slurred towards the end so he’d missed some of the details. Loki couldn’t understand how the woman had been so cruel to do it to Anthony on their wedding day. But, he supposed, it was better than lying and having an affair. Not that he’d dared to say that to the man.

When Anthony had ended up slumped over the bar and almost passed out. Loki found himself helping the man to his feet and getting him into the passenger seat of his rental car. He’d then driven the man to his motel, feeling once again grateful he’d chosen not to stay at his parent’s house.

He’d parked in front of his room, hauled Anthony out, got the door open to his motel room and dumped his former teacher on the couch. He’d then thrown a blanket over him and put out some Advil and water.

After that, he’d stripped to pyjamas, climbed into his bed and gone to sleep.

Waking up the next morning, he’d half expected to have dreamt the whole thing, but Anthony Stark was snuffling on the couch, still dead to the world. Loki had sat in bed observing the drooling man. He was the picture of disarray with crease marks on his face and rumpled clothes. Despite that, he still managed to look attractive.

If only my past-self could see me now.

He shook his head and climbed out of bed. He didn’t bother changing and went to the makeshift kitchen in nothing but sleep pants. He started to prepare coffee and a makeshift breakfast of jam and toast. He knew that after the amount of liquor he’d had, Anthony would need the sustenance.

Loki hadn’t been there for long before he heard sounds of life from his guest. He looked over his shoulder, finding him shifting and groaning. Loki bypassed putting down the bread in the toaster to focus on filling a mug with coffee and a dollop of milk. He didn’t know how Anthony liked it, but he hoped it would be passable.

You’re a grown man and far beyond your crush on him and yet, you still want his good opinion.

Loki shook his head and huffed a small laugh at himself. He crossed the motel room just as Anthony was rubbing his face and looking at the blanket in confusion.

“I remember you were always far too attached to coffee. I assume that has not changed.”

Anthony lifted his head. His eyes zeroed in on the mug and his hand darted out for it. Loki repressed a smile as he let the mug go, watching as his former teacher downed half of it in a single swallow. It was mildly impressive.

Once he’d inhaled almost the entire beverage, he blinked blearily and refocused back on Loki. He seemed confused at first, before his eyes widened and he groaned.

“Oh fuck,” he moaned. “Please tell me I didn’t offload on my former student and end up in his fucking motel?”

“I’m afraid even my ability to lie can not extend that far, Anthony.”

Anthony groaned again, clearly embarrassed while Loki just chuckled.

“You must have the shittest opinion of me right now,” Anthony mumbled.

“Hardly,” Loki insisted, his humour disappearing for firm seriousness. Anthony glanced at him. Loki held the man’s eyes and insisted, “You were the person I most respected in that hellhole that was high school. That has and will not change.”

He was rewarded by another one of those brief glimmers of a smile before it abruptly faded and pain clouded his features. Anthony stared at the mug and it took only a moment to realise that the school would no doubt remind him of his former fiancé. Loki cursed internally before quickly deciding to change tracks.

“Well,” he said brusquely, “finish that coffee and I will make you another one. I am also preparing jam on toast. Do not expect anything grander. You are lucky I had the foresight to purchase any food upon my arrival in town.”

Anthony blinked and seemed to focus more on the room rather than his pain. He drank his coffee almost automatically. When it was empty, Loki held out his hand for the mug and the man hesitatingly proffered it.

Loki took it and walked back into the kitchen. He started a fresh coffee for Anthony and one for himself.

As he was working, he heard new noises behind him. He glanced over his shoulder to find Anthony had sat up and had swallowed tablets along with the water Loki had left out. He stood and brought the glass towards the kitchen. Loki could not help letting his gaze travel over the man’s form.

He was older, that was obvious, but it only made him look more distinguished. Loki had always preferred older men and Anthony ticked every box Loki had. Of course, the man being broken-hearted and straight was something of a detriment.

Additionally, he wasn’t attempting to win Anthony, rather, he just wanted to try and do something to brighten and help him.

Anthony placed the glass on the sink and watched as Loki finished making the coffee. He passed the mug over to him. Anthony took it but didn’t take a sip. Loki watched him from the corner of his eye as he pushed down the bread.

“Why are you back here anyway?” Anthony asked. “I always thought you’d never step foot here again. You certainly had enough anger to burn the town down.”

Loki snorted. “Setting something aflame has crossed my mind a time or two.”

“I’m glad you just decided to switch the school flag to a Jolly Roger.”

Loki slanted a glance at Anthony. “I was never officially held responsible for that.”

Anthony snorted, smiling again. “Everyone knew it was you. And I mean everyone.”

“And yet, there was not a shred of proof.”

“That’s what happens when you do it at two a.m.”

Loki stiffened and turned to fully face Anthony. The man was giving that same smug smirk that had never once stopped being attractive. Loki adored people who were smart and mischievous. Honestly, Loki sometimes wondered if hadn’t been cruel fate that his perfect man had first appeared at such an inconvenient and impossible time.

He shook it off to focus on what Anthony had let slip.

“You were at the school at two a.m.”

“I had papers to grade.”

“Your classroom overlooks the school grounds. You would have seen whoever did it.”

“Yeah. Whoever,” Anthony stressed.

Loki’s lips twitched. He also turned back to the toaster and popped the bread; grateful it was brown and he could start spreading condiments.

They were quite for a long moment before Anthony remarked, “I heard you did well as a playwright. You were always good at English.”

Loki felt pure pride at the compliment and the knowledge that Anthony had known of his successes.

“Thank you.”

When the toast was complete, Loki held out a plate for the man. Anthony took it with a smile that was more of a grimace.

“Thanks. God, I’m really sorry to wreck your visit home.”

“Oh, I assure you, it was wrecked the moment I saw my father. You are actually an improvement.”

Anthony barked a harsh laugh. “That I doubt.”

“Oh?” Loki asked, lifting an eyebrow. “Odin’s first words to me were to ask if I was still ‘disgracing the family name’ by sleeping with men.”

Anthony blinked only to scowl a moment later. “What an asshole. I always hated him.”

“Mm,” Loki hummed and walked across the room. “Were it not for my mother and brother, I would have never stepped foot in this town again. But Frigga pleaded for me to visit and thus, I am here.”

“After his attitude, I can see why you chose a motel.”

“Indeed.”

Taking a seat on one end of the couch, Loki waited until Anthony was on the other side to bite into his toast. Anthony didn’t do the same and he observed the man. Anthony was staring at the food. Loki frowned, wondering if he was one of the many who struggled to eat after a break up.

Loki looked at him a little more critically. He did look a tad gaunt, but Loki had not contributed that to a lack of meals, now it made a worrying amount of sense.

“Well,” Loki said, “the food will not simply jump into your mouth.”

Anthony hesitated but he picked up the toast and took a bite. Loki continued with his own, but kept a careful eye on his former teacher, making sure he finished the slice. He also found his mind running with plans and considerations. It was the summer break so Anthony would have no classes to distract him from his heartache.

Perhaps, Loki could prove a reasonable alternative?

When the last of the toast was finished, Anthony stood. Loki paused mid-bite to watch him. He walked into the kitchen and put the plate and mug beside his glass. He came back into the main room and stared at a point beyond Loki’s shoulder.

“Thanks, um, for everything,” Anthony mumbled.

“You are welcome.”

Anthony finally met his gaze. The despondence and misery were still clearly lurking behind Anthony’s eyes, but his smile was genuine.

“It was good to see you, Loki. I’m glad you’re taking the world by storm.” He huffed a laugh. “Thanks for putting up with your disaster of a former teacher. I hope the rest of your time here goes better.”

Loki straightened and while he opened his mouth to speak, Anthony was already walking for the door and before Loki could get his thoughts together, Anthony was opening and shutting it. Loki put down his toast beside his coffee mug, almost knocking it as he stood and went to the door.

He opened it and looked out, finding Anthony walking away with his hands in his pockets. Loki pursed his lips as Anthony turned down a corner and disappeared.

Still, Loki was not deterred. He had made his choice and his stubbornness was legendary. His hometown wasn’t large and he knew it back to front. It wouldn’t be hard to find Anthony and convince the older man to spend some time with him.

He found the man grocery shopping which was actually something of a relief.

In the few hours since the man had departed, Loki had begun to worry as to how little he was eating.

Anthony had always walked around class with some kind of snack in his hand. He was also notorious for throwing dried fruit at anyone who was falling asleep during a lesson.

Unfortunately, while Loki had taken the time to shower and refresh, the man only seemed to look worse after returning home. He’d changed clothing but hadn’t fixed his facial hair and his hair was limp on his head. He also wore only jeans, untied sneakers and a baggy jumper.

Many people were giving him sympathetic looks but no one was approaching. Loki didn’t hesitate to join the man as he stared at boxes of cereal.

“Surely you are not about to purchase Fruit Loops?”

Anthony startled and turned to him, seeming surprised. He then offered a vague smile.

“Who can go past a toucan?”

“Someone who wants a modicum of fibre rather than pure sugar in their diet?”

“You’re really bossy, did you know that?”

“Yes,” Loki answered unflinchingly.

He also grabbed Anthony’s trolley and tugged it down the aisle, Anthony seemed bemused but he allowed it. Loki dragged him to the opposite end which had the more healthier options. He grabbed one which had a significant amount of fibre and protein before holding it out to him.

Anthony took it with a vague smile and read the box.

“Cascadian Farm Hearty Morning. That sounds pretty bland.”

“Top it with dried fruit.”

“Dried fruit, huh?”

“I do remember getting pelted by that more than once in class.”

“Pfft,” Anthony scoffed. “I never threw them at you. You always paid attention.”

Loki swallowed, not willing to admit that was less to do with the lesson and more to do with the object of his infatuation. But before Loki was forced to come up with a response, Anthony was placing the cereal in his trolley.

“I take it you’re here to replenish your food supplies?”

“Well, there was little to replenish. But yes, a shop is in order.”

Anthony smiled that same vague, not quite bright smile. “And you ambushed me because?”

“You were in dire need of guidance.”

Anthony snorted and shook his head, but when Loki tugged on his trolley, Anthony actually followed along.

“So, we’re shopping together, are we?” Anthony questioned.

“Yes.”

“And I’m putting up with this, why?”

“Because I have exemplary tastes. Now, do you have a shopping list?”

Anthony’s growing smile decreased until it was non-existent.

“No, I, um, never made the lists.” He looked away. “Or did the shopping, really.”

Loki was quick to catch the implication. Miss Potts, it seemed, had done the groceries. He pursed his lips.

“Well, that shall be remedied quickly. You’ll follow my lead.”

Anthony’s bemused expression returned. “Your lead, huh? How times have changed.”

“For the better really,” Loki remarked, “if you were about to buy Fruit Loops.”

His comment had the success of making Anthony laugh. It was only a small thing, but it was genuine. Anthony eyed him like a strange peculiarity, but amusement was overshadowing his grief.

“You really turned into a bit of an asshole, didn’t you?”

Despite the words seeming negative, Loki knew it was not the case. Rather, Loki believed he was exactly what Anthony needed to jar him from his maudlin behaviour. The rest of the townsfolk were sympathetic and giving him a wide berth with which he could wallow in his grief. Loki had no qualms with pushing into the man’s space and forcing him to react and think about something different.

So, Loki grinned at him.

“You make the mistake of believing I wasn’t already one.”

Anthony laughed again. He also shook his head.

“Fine, fine, asshole. Well, what are we getting next?”

“Something for dinner,” Loki decided. “Chicken perhaps. A side of vegetables.”

Anthony’s nose scrunched. “You get that. I’m getting a microwave meal.”

Loki made a noise of derision. “Absolutely not.”

“Why? They’re just as good as the real thing!”

“If they are lasagne, perhaps. But-”

“Hell no,” Anthony insisted. “You do not freeze lasagne.”

Loki raised his eyebrows, surprised by the insistence, but then, Loki did vaguely remember Anthony mentioning he had Italian heritage once.

Seeing the man more animated than he had been since Loki’s arrival at the bar, he decided to continue with the argument.

“I have had it before, there is very little taste-”

“There is a huge taste difference,” Anthony insisted.

Loki barely repressed a smile as Anthony began to give his lecture. And it was a lecture, it was reminiscent of how he spoke in class when someone offended his principles or said something blatantly idiotic. The difference was that Anthony gestured more with his hands, peppered his depictions with swear words and gave Loki his full attention as opposed to a class of twenty.

Loki listened with amusement even as they walked up and down the aisles and Loki pulled items from the shelves and into the trolley. Whenever Anthony started to peter out or grow pained, Loki always made sure to fire a new comment or put something ridiculous into the trolley. They both worked a treat at getting his mind off Miss Potts.

When they ended up at the cashier, Anthony seemed surprised as they started pulling out their purchases and separating them. A young girl was behind the register, she looked like she was either fresh out of high school or in her final year.

“Hi, Mr Stark,” she greeted.

She flicked her eyes to Loki before back to him.

“Hey, Cynthia,” he answered. “How’s the summer job?”

“It’s really great, Mr Stark,” she enthused.

She looked again at Loki, but made no comment, instead she started sliding through their items.

Anthony chatted with her absently, as she ran up first Loki’s sale, then his. When she finished and their receipts had been handed back, she bit her lip before rushing out, “I’m really glad you’re happier, Mr Stark.”

Anthony looked completely startled. He also swallowed, looking between his student and Loki. While Loki knew the girl was inaccurate and that, at his core, Anthony was not happier, it was obvious that Loki’s presence was at least helping.

“Thanks,” Anthony said quietly.

She smiled and with customers already behind them, the two of them left. They didn’t speak another word and they soon exited the grocers together and ended up just outside the doors. Their bags were still in the same trolley and Loki already had no wish to leave the man to his own devices.

“So, um.” Anthony cleared his throat. “Where’s your car? I can take the trolley there.”

Loki pointed and started walking towards it. Anthony followed and when they reached it, he opened it and started putting the bags in with Anthony’s assistance. When he finished, Loki noticed Anthony shuffling his feet and tapping his fingers on the trolley’s handle. He wouldn’t meet Loki’s gaze.

“So, uh, guess you’ve got plans for the day, huh?”

“In this town?” Loki enquired, filling the question with sarcasm.

Anthony laughed awkwardly. “Well, with your family, I guess. Or old friends.”

Ah, Loki thought, suddenly understanding the awkwardness. He does not want to be left alone, but believes that he soon will be.

It hurt Loki to see his friendly, confident, caring teacher without anyone to lean on. Or, perhaps, without someone who did not so completely remind him of his ex-lover and the future they had planned together.

Loki was different and separate from Miss Potts. He was also brusque and bold enough to do things to jolt Anthony from his thoughts.

I’m really glad you’re happier. The young girl had made it obvious; he was already succeeding in his task and he wasn’t about to stop. Anthony had only made it easier

“I have precious few friends and none of them live in this town.” Loki tilted his head. “However, considering what you planned to eat for a meal, I am considering dragging you to get a proper lunch somewhere before letting you go on your way.”

Anthony’s gaze snapped to his only for him to give a smile that couldn’t hide his relief.

“I didn’t realise you’d still be ordering me around after you’d utilised my trolley.”

“Absolutely,” Loki insisted. “In fact, if you wish to serve the purpose of allowing me time away from my family, I may be inclined to spend numerous hours with you.”

Anthony’s expression brightened for a moment. His smile looking like the one Loki could remember from a decade past – but then it disappeared, and in its place was something small and vulnerable.

“You could just do something on your own, or lie,” He murmured softly. “I don’t think I’ll be the best company.” Anthony chuckled roughly and ran a hand over his hair. “I’m kind of a fucking disaster, Loki. Not to mention the town’s biggest sad sack.”

“You are hurt,” Loki acknowledged, not hiding from the truth. “But that does not limit any enjoyment I gain from being around you. I’m rather curious, actually, to see what you are like outside of a classroom.”

He also dared to step closer and place a hand on the man’s arm. It gave him a soft thrill. He was doing nothing wrong, in fact, most of the people in the town would likely not recognise him or realise he was once the man’s student. They were two grown men, and nothing about his touch was flirtatious. But touching Anthony Stark so casually still did something to him – something he did not wish to quantify.

“I would enjoy spending time with you, Anthony.”

Anthony chuckled. “Then you have really bad taste in people, because this is a grand time to get to know me.”

“Anthony-”

“But, I’m not an idiot.” He drew in a deep breath. “Everyone and their dog knows that I could use the company.” His lips twitched. “And you make me laugh. If you’re willing to hang around, I’ll take it for as long as you can put up with me.”

While Loki hated seeing Anthony so downtrodden and self-depreciating, he knew he couldn’t show it. So, he did what he did best; he was rude.

“With such a glowing reference, I’m surprised I’m not leaping to follow you down the street.”

Anthony blinked, momentarily startled before he abruptly and roughly laughed.

“Well, shit. Yeah. That was a great sales pitch. This is why I don’t teach English.”

“And I thought it was due to your atrocious spelling.”

Anthony shot him a wry look. “God, you’re an asshole, Lokes.”

Loki’s breath caught and his eyes widened briefly. Lokes. Anthony always gave the teachers nicknames, but never the students. He was always professional about that. A line was very determinedly drawn in the sand.

But it felt clear in that moment that whatever Anthony saw in him, it wasn’t a student, but another adult.

A man.

And if he sees me as a man perhaps…

But Loki slammed a hard door shut on that thought. Yes, Anthony was attractive. Yes, Loki had been infatuated with him long ago, but the man was grieving a broken heart. Anthony was also, for all intense and purposes, straight.

He was only here to help the man who had helped him long ago. And even though he enjoyed Anthony’s company and already felt at ease with him, Loki would not lose sight of the reality of the situation.

Anthony Stark was off-limits. No matter how handsome and intelligent he might be.

After offloading their groceries in their cars, Loki—keeping with the theme of being an asshole—had ordered Anthony to meet him at the town diner in thirty minutes. Anthony had only been amused.

When Loki had arrived at the arranged time, he’d found Anthony had actually changed his worn hoodie to a shirt and jacket. His facial hair was still in disarray and his expression maudlin, but that small change was an improvement.

It meant, in some way, he was helping. The thought had flooded him with fresh confidence.

When Loki had climbed into the booth opposite his former teacher and commented on Anthony finally being early for something (his lateness to class, while not every day, was common enough to warrant the tease) had found him laughing and bantering back.

And Anthony truly did have a stunning smile.

Loki had been prepared for a difficult and rocky conversation, but it turned out he needn’t have worried. While there were moments when Anthony’s melancholy threatened to overwhelm him, Loki had a knack for steering it away. He was also able to distract Anthony enough that he ate a full plate of food and a brownie for dessert.

And although Loki had thought it before at the grocers, he was still surprised at how incredibly easy it was to talk with Anthony. It was true that much of their conversation was barbs and witticisms, but Loki found it invigorating.

Loki felt no desire to end it, and it seemed, Anthony was the same.

They stayed sitting at the diner long past the end of their meal and when they finally did leave it was only due to Loki taking a call from Frigga asking where he was and when he would be visiting.

Loki was frustrated that the call was enough to have Anthony rising and going to pay his half of the bill. When Loki was off the phone and had paid for his half, he hurried outside to find Anthony waiting by the door. He had his hands in his pockets and his head tilted towards the sky.

It was one more inconsistency that the man with a thousand different sunglasses currently wore none.

“Off to see your family?” Anthony questioned, not looking at him.

“Unless you have an excuse to allow me to avoid it.”

Anthony snorted. He turned back to Loki.

“No. You go see them.”

“You do remember it is something I am not fond of doing?”

“Then why did you come back here?” Anthony asked, annoyingly perceptive.

Loki scrunched his face, not pleased by that.

“Your voice gets soft when you talk to your Mum. And you mentioned her and Thor the other day. You like them.”

“Perhaps,” Loki muttered grudgingly.

“Then go spend time with them. Don’t bother with me.”

“You are hardly a bother, Anthony,” Loki drawled. “And I assure you, if I did not enjoy speaking with you, I would have avoided your aisle in the grocers.”

“Instead, you ambushed me.”

“Mm,” Loki hummed. “And I will do it again if you are not careful.”

“So, you’re saying I better agree to hang out with you again?”

“Precisely.”

Anthony laughed and shook his head, but he was giving that small smile again.

“Demanding little shit, aren’t you?”

“I am.”

The smile deepened. “Fine, whatever. Sure.”

“Excellent. I shall contact you when I am free of my family.”

Loki pulled out his phone and went to the contact’s screen. He glanced at Anthony and it took a moment before the man did the same. There was something bizarre in exchanging numbers with the man. Something that even Anthony seemed to feel, but neither of them commented on it.

After all, there was nothing untoward in their behaviour. It was unexpected, perhaps, but nothing that needed to be hidden.

“I guess I better wish you good luck,” Anthony said. His smile had dimmed a little but his words were genuine. “Thanks for lunch. I had fun.”

“As did I.”

Anthony’s smile spread a little wider. He also hesitated before holding out his hand. Loki’s lips twitched but he took it and shook. Anthony’s hand was calloused and warm. Loki felt a tingle go through his body, starting from their point of contact, but he refused to acknowledge it.

Anthony let him go first. He also offered a small wave before he was walking down the street. Loki watched him, and perhaps it was just an illusion, but unlike in the morning, Loki swore his shoulders did not seem as slumped or dejected.

Loki had not planned to message Anthony while he was at his family home, but it did not take long before he remembered why he did not visit frequently. It wasn’t just Odin; it was the entire nature of the household.

Thor was still and always would be the golden child. Frigga would always be wife first and mother second. Odin would always rule with an iron fist. It was a world he had never quite fit into and certainly not after ten years living away.

He had intended to message his few friends, only to pause with the memory of Anthony’s number.

He’d ended up pulling up a message and firing off a text.

‘At this rate, I will be visiting you within the hour. Or perhaps murdering someone.’

The response took a few minutes.

‘The target isn’t specific?’

‘My anger fluctuates.’

‘Don’t fluctuate it my way.’

Loki grinned, having to do his best to hide it from his family.

‘If you consent to being my escape from dinner.’

There was a brief pause before, ‘Are you trying to make me eat?’

Loki hesitated. Truthfully, he was endeavouring to keep the man eating, but he doubted the statement would meet with anything positive.

‘If you refuse, I can always microwave lasagne.’

‘You didn’t buy any.’

‘I can change that.’

‘Fine, asshole. Fine. We’ll have dinner.’

Loki found it even harder to hide his smile. Luckily, no one save Frigga was paying him any attention and he was able to arrange a time to meet with Anthony.

The mere thought increased his mood and made it easier for him to get through a few hours with his family. The continual texts from Anthony only added to his enjoyment of the afternoon. When he was finally able to escape to his motel, he felt excited to see the man.

It was only when he pulled out his suitcase and was looking for something to change into that he froze, swallowed and realised exactly what he was doing.

He was getting ready. He was trying to look impressive.

Good God, this is not a date.

Closing his eyes, Loki pulled in a deep breath before letting it out. He opened his eyes and forcibly refolded his favourite green shirt. He was not about to make an ass out of himself by fantasising something into existence that wasn’t even there.

This is a friendly gesture on your part and frankly, a need for companionship on his. Do not imagine it is more than what it could ever possibly be.

He closed his suitcase and zipped it tight. There was nothing wrong with what he was wearing. In fact, Anthony would hardly care as to his outfit.

You have shared every meal with him today, his mind traitorously reminded him. If this was anyone else, you either wouldn’t have bothered or been planning to sleep with them.

Loki gritted his teeth.

“Anthony is different,” he muttered.

Because the man was and he wasn’t going to examine the particulars as to why. He was doing a good deed and he would simply have to get control of himself.

After all, he was only in town for a little over a week. When that time was over, he would be heading back to New York and Anthony would be on his own and hopefully closer to healing his heart than when Loki had first arrived.

Loki tried.

He had really tried.

It had all started innocently. He’d wanted to help the teacher who had done so much for him. He’d wanted to mend the broken-heart of a man who was too kind to be in so much pain.

But what had he gone and done?

He’d found the old, dusty candle that had once held his crush and he’d lit it.

Because, good God, the man truly was incredible.

It wasn’t starry-eyed naivety. Anthony could hyper-fixate, he had a drinking problem, he was stubborn, bull-headed and far too prone to self-deprecation.

But when he wasn’t those things? He was not only funny, unbelievably intelligent, easy to spend time with and handsome, but a thousand more addictive things as well.

Loki wasn’t crushing on a teacher. He was infatuated with a slightly broken, but extremely kind-hearted man.

Because after that first day, Anthony had even started to message him. He'd started to suggest places and times to hang out.

While they had mostly met up at the diner to begin with, when Loki had remarked about revisiting the town as an adult, Anthony had seemed galvanised to show him around.

They ended up at the bar a few too many times, but Loki took great care to steer Anthony away from the alcohol as much as possible. They often walked around the streets as Loki discussed his travels and time living in New York. Anthony even spoke about growing up in the city and his struggles with his father.

It had quickly painted a picture as to how he’d ended up in the small town inspiring and helping new generations rather than in his father’s large and profitable company. He’d wanted an escape and when his best friend had retired injured from the Air Force and gone back to his home town, Anthony had followed him.

Everyone, including Anthony, had expected him to get bored and move on, but he’d settled into the quaint town which had treated him like a regular person. He’d gained friends, a community and, for a while, a girlfriend. A woman who didn’t care about Anthony’s name or the money his inheritance would give him.

But things had fallen apart in the form of Miss Potts’ wandering heart. And things had gotten complicated by the attachment of Loki’s to Anthony.

Because days in the man’s company only had Loki wanting more. It also had him wanting to keep contributing to Anthony’s upward trajectory. It found Loki extending his stay in the town by another week. And then a second. Before he knew what was happening, Loki was standing in the motel room that he’d rented for a fourth week, staring at the green shirt he had worn four times in Anthony’s presence.

He’d spent every day with Anthony since arriving. He’d never done that with any other man he’d dated. Loki was completely smitten and there was no turning back. Even the townsfolk had noticed their budding friendship, but that wasn’t particularly important. His mother and brother had and that was slightly more concerning.

Thor had cornered him one evening on his second week after he’d been forced to attend dinner. Frigga had been delighted he was staying longer and he’d avoided explaining why. He’d been out on the front porch texting Anthony when his brother had appeared with a beer for himself and a tea for Loki. They’d relaxed against the porch together with Loki resisting the urge to check his phone again as his brother sipped the drink.

“You clearly wish to say something,” Loki had said, determined to get it over with.

“You always were fond of Mr Stark.”

Loki had stiffened, unable to help it. His brother had shot him a glance that was far too knowing.

“I am fond of people with a modicum of wit.”

Thor had grinned. “You were fond of a lot more of him in high school.”

Loki hadn’t been able to keep from flushing. “Shut up, Thor.”

Thor had laughed. But all too soon he’d sobered, watching him with concern.

“Does he know… about you?”

“That I am flamingly gay, you mean?” Loki had drawled. “Yes, Anthony is not oblivious.”

Thor’s eyebrows had risen at the use of the man’s first name, but otherwise hadn’t commented.

“Is he aware that, of all the boys in our class and teachers we had, he was the one you were so enamoured by?”

Loki had tried not to shift. “It’s hardly relevant. Everyone has teenage crushes.”

“Yes, brother. But not everyone is so close in age to their infatuation, nor befriends them in adult life.”

Loki had put down his tea on the banister. “What are you attempting to imply, brother?”

Thor had sighed. “Perhaps I am speaking of this wrongly.”

He then put down his beer, faced Loki fully and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“I have no objection to your attachment to Mr Stark. You are both grown men. I merely wish to make certain you will be well no matter what may come to pass.” Thor had looked concerned. “It has not escaped my notice that your stay has been increased for reasons other than your family. I do not want you hurt.”

Loki had clenched his jaw if only to keep from lashing out. Not because he hadn’t appreciated his brother’s words, but because he’d spoken of things that Loki had tried so hard to deny to himself. In fact, even that night he had rejected it. He’d shrugged off his brother’s touch and told him he was overreacting.

He'd also shut down the conversation soon after.

But it had played on Loki’s mind as he continued to spend time around Anthony. Because once pointed out, it was hard for Loki to truly ignore the truth.

He did like Anthony. He did want to date him. But he was also not stupid. Because what were the odds Anthony would ever want anything with him?

Because Anthony was still healing. He was better but Loki had seen him during highs and also incredible lows. As only a few days after his talk with Thor, Loki had been forced to see Anthony at one of his most vulnerable moments.

He’d been at the man’s modest two-storey home. It had been over four months since the wedding-that-wasn’t and Miss Potts had long moved out and taken her belongings with her, but Loki had been over for dinner when a knock had come at the door.

Anthony had been in the kitchen showing him the proper way to cook lasagne and had asked him to get it. Loki had done so only to be faced with a woman who had aged since he’d last seen her, but was still as beautiful as ever.

“Oh, hello,” Miss Potts had said, smiling awkwardly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know Tony would have company.”

Loki had leant against the door, purposefully barring it.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t aware Anthony was expecting a visitor.”

“I can come back,” she’d said.

Loki had been very happy by the idea of sending her on her way, if cursing hadn’t come from the other room. He’d looked over his shoulder only to see Anthony hurrying towards the door. His face had paled and he’d looked apologetic.

“Fuck, sorry. I’d forgotten.”

“It’s okay, Tony,” Miss Potts had immediately said, her voice soft. “I can get them later.”

“No, um.” Anthony had gone to rub a hand over his hair, but at the last moment had grimaced, looking down at the flour on it. “No, it’s fine.”

Loki still hadn’t moved but Anthony reached out and lightly touched his arm. Loki didn’t even flinch at the feeling of flour on his skin.

“Come on, Lokes.”

Loki hadn’t looked away from Miss Potts and it was why he was able to see her eyes widen with surprised recognition.

“Oh,” she’d said. “Loki Odinson.” She’d glanced at Anthony, a small frown puckering her brow. “Your former student?”

There had been a wealth of confusion in her tone, but luckily, no condemnation.

“Uh, yeah,” Anthony had answered. Loki had glanced at him, finding the man sheepish but thankfully not guilty. “We met up. He’s visiting his family.”

“That’s nice,” Miss Potts had said. Her gaze had then flicked to Anthony’s hands, a small frown forming. “What is on your hands?”

“Oh, er. Flour.”

“Anthony is preparing lasagne,” Loki had answered.

Miss Potts had looked shocked. “You’re cooking?”

“Yeah,” Anthony had shuffled awkwardly. “Loki doesn’t know what good lasagne is.”

Miss Potts’ gaze had lurched to Loki. The earlier confusion had returned but so had a suspicious consideration. Loki had felt, momentarily, as if he'd been dragged into the principal’s office again and was being judged as to whether he was guilty or innocent of the latest prank.

But he was a grown man. He’d withstood worse than a former Vice Principal’s examination. He’d raised his eyebrows back at her, giving nothing away.

“Well,” she had eventually said. “I don’t want to keep you from your meal.”

“Yeah, yeah, right,” Anthony had answered. “Let me get the um,” he’d swallowed, “stuff.” He’d made to step further into house before glancing at his hands and wincing. “One second.”

He’d turned towards the kitchen, leaving the two of them alone. Loki had taken the moment to look the woman up and down. She had dressed simply in a skirt and blouse, her strawberry blonde hair loose around her face.

“Tony doesn’t cook for people often,” Miss Potts had remarked.

“Really?” Loki had questioned. “He was remarkably easy to coax into the job. Rather, it was harder to convince him out of it.”

Her brows had furrowed further. “How long have you been spending time with him?”

“I’m sorry,” Loki had said, his voice going cold. “Since when was my association with your ex-fiancé any of your business?”

She’d flinched and Loki had felt vicious satisfaction. Regardless of her reasoning, Loki had decided to despise her on sight for her actions towards Anthony.

“You’re right,” she had agreed. “It isn’t my business.” She’d then smiled softly. “But I’m glad to see him with company.” Her gaze had then flicked over him, something strangely assessing about it. “No matter how unexpected it turned out to be.”

Loki had swallowed, feeling a shiver of fear at what she might have uncovered or assumed about them. But before he had even considered interrogating her, Anthony had appeared with a box in his hands. His previous enthusiasm and energy seemed to have been sucked away. Loki had been forced to step to the side as he’d handed it over.

“The last of your things,” he’d whispered, not meeting her gaze.

Miss Potts’ gaze had immediately turned pained and she’d taken the items, making sure not to touch Anthony’s hands.

“Thank you,” she’d murmured.

Anthony had nodded and although the moment could have stretched, Loki had made sure to end it with an abrupt clearing of his throat. Miss Potts had taken the cue and given them a quick goodbye before leaving. Loki had closed the door while also placing a hand on the shorter man’s back.

“Anthony,” he’d begun.

“I’d forgot she was coming,” he’d interrupted with a rough laugh. “God, how fucking stupid was that? I’m sorry.”

“You do not have to apologise.”

“Yeah, I do,” Anthony had admitted. “I don’t… I don’t do well after I’ve seen her.”

Loki’s lips had pursed before he’d made a decision.

“Very well,” he’d agreed. “Then I shall make the lasagne. You can direct me.”

Anthony had tried to protest but Loki had forcefully dragged him back into the kitchen. And while Anthony had been more sullen, maudlin and stubbornly uncooperative, Loki had managed to make the lasagne and it was even passable.

But that night had been more difficult and less enjoyable than Loki had wanted. Despite never once throwing him out or asking him to leave, Anthony had still reached for the scotch, got black out drunk and ended up sobbing into his hands. Loki had comforted him as best he could, but had been left feeling useless.

But the next morning, after Loki had woken up with a crick in his neck on the couch, Anthony had offered an awkward smile and a coffee. He’d also spoken surprisingly candidly about Miss Potts and about everything their break up had entailed.

Loki had heard many people talk about lost love. He’d heard Anthony talk about it as well, but as he’d sat in Anthony’s living room, listening to him speak, Loki had been able to hear something final in the words. Something, almost like closure.

And it had given him hope.

Each following day had only seemed to highlight that. Anthony had not carried himself with as much of a slump. He'd taken to gelling his hair and keeping his facial hair immaculate. He'd laughed more, teased Loki and his famed sunglasses had even reappeared.

He was not completely healed, but he was well on his way.

And it had brought Loki to where he now was; standing in a motel room a month after he’d first arrived, looking at the space that was becoming familiar and thinking about a man who’s broken heart was still on the mend. Someone who wasn’t even bisexual as far as he knew.

And despite trying as hard as he could to do the opposite, Loki knew his candle was burning bright.

He was falling in love with Anthony Stark and he knew there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Loki did everything possible to contain his growing infatuation and keep it hidden from Anthony. But he found his gaze lingering on Anthony’s lips. His hands twitching with the need to brush against Anthony, rub his shoulders or stroke his hair.

It did not help that Anthony was smiling more and touching him. The man was naturally affectionate and as he started to heal, those touches were becoming more prominent. To make things even harder, a few days after reaching his irrefutable conclusion about his feelings, Loki was making breakfast and his phone rang.

He saw it was Anthony and repressed a smile. “Good morning, Anthony.”

“Loki!” Anthony said.

His voice was so full of excitement and enthusiasm that Loki’s grin finally broke free. Loki also stopped what he was doing to give the man his complete attention.

“Are you busy today?” Anthony questioned.

“As it is only early morning, you are the first to bombard me with that question. And even if I were-”

“I’d be your excuse to get out of it,” Anthony said, sounding entertained.

Loki’s smile deepened. Despite Anthony being a number of years older than him, it had quickly become obvious that he had a childlike enthusiasm that Loki couldn’t match. Loki’s excitement was softer and more subtly expressed. Loki still greatly enjoyed watching Anthony alight with all of the life and happiness he remembered from his youth.

“Yes,” Loki drawled. “Now, what do you have planned for us today?”

“Paintball.”

Loki sucked in a small breath. He knew exactly where Anthony wanted to take him. Just outside of town on unfarmable and uninhabitable land a paintball course had been developed half a decade ago. It was well-regarded as the best in the state and even Thor had raved about it and been numerous times.

But that wasn’t what held Loki’s attention. Because he knew from discussions with Anthony that the course was owned and run by James Rhodes: Anthony’s best friend.

“Your friend’s business,” Loki murmured.

“Yeah! He’s going to let us in for free. Isn’t that awesome?”

Loki swallowed, feeling nervousness threaten to overtake him. Luckily, he was able to keep it from his voice, “How fabulous.”

“Yeah! It’ll be great. I haven’t been there in ages and you’ve never been at all. He’s always changing it. So, we’ll both be on even ground. I’ll pick you up in an hour, alright?”

“Certainly,” Loki agreed.

“Wear something you don’t mind getting paint on, Lokes!”

With those final words, Anthony hung up and Loki was left to put down his phone and stare at it. His stomach took the time to twist with uncertainty. Loki knew that no matter the light-hearted nature of the request, Anthony would be introducing him to the famed ‘Rhodey’.

While people introduced friends all the time, Loki knew it was different. He wanted it to be different. And yet, at the same time, he feared being seen as the enamoured man he was.

Do not start that. The man will only know if you make it obvious.

He clenched his jaw, refusing to let his infatuation ruin things. Loki focused on hurriedly cooking his breakfast. It was only a simple meal and it left him with additional time to go through his suitcase. But, in the end, nothing had seemed suitable and he’d ended up taking a quick trip to the store to buy jeans and a black shirt.

He had only just returned back and changed when he’d heard honking from the carpark. Checking the time, Loki had grabbed his things and opened the door. Anthony was grinning, pink sunglasses on his head as he waved from the front seat of his red convertible.

“There are other people staying in this motel,” Loki reprimanded.

“Too bad for them that they aren’t playing paintball.”

He patted the seat beside him and Loki shook his head even while locking his door and joining Anthony in his car.

“If you were any older,” Loki remarked, “I’d call this car a midlife crisis.”

“This is a classic car, Loki. It’s timeless.”

“It’s cherry red.”

“Hotrod red, Loki. Hotrod.”

“I find it concerning that you would be so specific about a colour.”

“This baby has to look her best.”

He even patted the car. Loki rolled his eyes. “Please do not tell me you have named it.”

“Firstly, it’s a she. And yes, Friday has a name.”

Loki blinked. “Friday?”

“Yeah, as in my girl Friday. Because trust me, this baby is my favourite thing to see after a long week of dealing with teenagers.”

“And here I thought it was because you lack creativity and bought her on a Friday.”

Anthony cleared his throat and didn’t meet Loki’s gaze, choosing instead to pull out of the lot. Loki’s lips twitched. He had a feeling that, despite what Anthony had claimed, he was right about the origins of the car’s name.

“Right, so, it’s about a half hour drive out to the course, but since it’s the middle of the week it probably won’t be very busy,” Anthony explained. “And Rhodey said when we finish that we can catch him on his lunch break and maybe go get some hamburgers. Then, I was thinking, we can either have another round or do something else. Do you need to get back to see your family today?” He glanced at Loki but didn’t wait for him to answer. “Rhodey said we can stay on the property. He’s got this sort of house there. Or well, it’s not really a house, but I’ve crashed there with him a few times. There’s definitely enough room for three.”

“I have no plans,” Loki admitted.

Yet, even as he said it, Loki felt conflicted over the various ideas Anthony was laying out. While he knew he shouldn’t be jealous or unhappy about Anthony wanting to introduce him to someone whom Anthony cared deeply for, he simply didn’t want to give up his time with Anthony.

He had been with the man exclusively for weeks. He simply… he simply wanted Anthony all to himself.

Foolish. You were never going to be able to maintain this or keep him in the long-term.

Anthony however, was oblivious to his thoughts and dissatisfaction.

“Great!” Anthony enthused. “We’ll chat to Rhodey and see what happens. He can probably lend you some clothes too, if you need them.” Anthony winked. “Or we can just strip and wait for them to wash. I’ve done that before too.”

Loki swallowed again, his pulse racing as his mind taunted him with images of the man that he longed for in nothing but underwear.

“Hey, did you buy new clothes?”

Loki cleared his throat. “Yes, I did not want to ruin the ones I had brought with me.”

There was a brief pause before Anthony answered, “Yeah, I suppose you do have a limited supply.”

The man’s voice had changed and Loki immediately looked away from the passing scenery to eye the man. Anthony’s features had switched from joyful to pensive. Loki quickly felt concerned.

“Anthony?” he asked, his tone a little sharp.

He had long learned how to catch the undercurrents of the man’s mood and act accordingly. Anthony glanced at him.

“Nothing. I just…” Anthony bit his lip and looked back at the road. “You’ve been here a lot longer than you were meant to, haven’t you?”

Loki stiffened. It had never come up and Loki had purposefully avoided mentioning anything about his time in the town. As a playwright, he could work anywhere. While New York had many benefits, he had enough success that he could afford the extra time away from the city and the rent on his apartment as well as that of a modest motel.

“I had no set time I needed to leave by,” Loki answered vaguely.

Anthony side-eyed him. “And you just randomly decided to hang around here?”

Loki couldn’t look away from Anthony. The man was back to focusing on the road, but Loki confessed his words softly, “I like being here.”

He saw Anthony’s thick swallow, but the man didn’t comment. Loki’s heart raced and he wondered if Anthony had even an inkling of what any of this meant. If he knew what Loki felt or if he thought it was merely friendship and compassion.

Loki almost wanted to ask, but he couldn’t dare to bring it up. He looked out at the passing scenery instead.

When Anthony switched on music, Loki was grateful for the distraction, even if it was just him critiquing the man’s music choices. At least it got Anthony laughing again, which only loosened the tension in Loki’s shoulders.

Because, if Anthony realised Loki was falling in love with him, he doubted the man would be so easily relaxed or entertained.

Meeting James Rhodes turned out to be easier than expected, helped in part by the fact the course was overrun by a large party of teenagers. James Rhodes and his staff were busy and they only managed the most perfunctory greeting before some of the teenagers had recognised Anthony.

“Mr Stark!” One of the kids had said. He’d rushed up to him and grinned. “Are you and your friend paintballing today?”

“We’d planned on it.”

“You should join us!” He’d grinned. “We’d kick your ass.”

“Really? You think so?” Anthony had questioned, raising his eyebrows.

“Hell yeah!”

Anthony had glanced at him. “What do you say, Loki? Think we could take on my sophomores?”

Loki grin had been devious. “Oh, without doubt.”

The teenagers hadn’t seemed concerned, in fact they’d grinned back.

After that, there was little that could keep Anthony or Loki out of the party. And the kids soon learned their lesson at asking them to play. Anthony was incredibly proficient with guns, mechanics and mathematical angles. Whereas Loki was stealthy, calculating and ruthless. They made a formidable team and decimated the larger opposing forces, much to the complaining, swearing and whining of the teenagers.

The two of them had ended up laughing beneath some trees. They were completely obscured by a pallet wall behind which they’d taken refuge. They were lying in the dirt beside each other. Neither of them had a smidge of paint and at last count, they only had three teenagers left to defeat. Anthony had pushed up his mask and was grinning, his hair damp with sweat.

“These kids didn’t know what they were up against.”

Pushing up his own, Loki grinned. “A grave tactical mistake on their part.”

Anthony chuckled again. He also lifted his arm, wrapping it around Loki’s shoulders and pulling him close. They ended up pressed together with their faces inches apart and Anthony half on his back. Loki sucked in a sharp breath as he looked down at the man. All he could smell was the man’s spicy cologne.

“You and me, Lokes,” Anthony said softly. “Nothing can beat this team.”

Anthony’s smile was wide, genuine and without a hint of sorrow catching at the corners. He was complimenting them. They were alone. They were also so close Loki could feel the man’s body heat.

Loki was high on adrenaline, success and happiness. He was in a half-hug and leaning over his infatuation—and with such a lethal combination, it was all too easy to close the remaining space, tilt his head and press his mouth to Anthony’s.

For a split-second it felt good. A high unlike anything Loki could have imagined – but then Anthony made a shocked noise. Loki’s eyes snapped open and they each pulled back. Anthony’s eyes were wide and he was staring at Loki in complete astonishment.

Loki’s lips parted but he didn’t know what to say. He licked them and Anthony’s gaze jerked down. Loki’s heart raced and he didn’t dare move. He licked them again and saw something flash through Anthony’s eyes. Something that made him shuffle a small amount nearer. Anthony’s hand had shifted to his neck and he felt it flex and this time it was Anthony who closed the space.

Their lips came together again.

It was soft and tentative as their mouths caressed. Loki felt overly aware of everything; every touch, every smell, every sound. And it was the sound of a snapping twig that made them jerk apart a second time. It came from in front of them and Anthony scrabbled away from him. His eyes were wide and darting around nervously.

“Anthony-” Loki tried.

But a volley of paint came their way. They both had to roll to the side and Anthony was instantly snapping down his mask. Loki did the same and they grabbed and readied their weapons. They both fired upon the approaching teenagers, but were unable to get a clear shot.

Neither side gained any hits and they were forced to relocate. Loki was just grateful that the angle of the approach meant the teenagers wouldn’t have seen anything. Despite that, even when they’d doubled-back and were out of sight or hearing range, Anthony was avoiding looking at him.

“Anthony,” he tried again.

“Let’s just finish the game, Loki.”

“But-”

However, the man was already walking away and to the next bit of cover. Loki clenched his hand tight around the gun, feeling frustrated and worried.

But he kissed me back.

Loki didn’t want to wait to sort this out – to know.

He followed after the man, but when they reached an erected piece of cover. Loki grabbed Anthony’s arm and yanked him behind it.

“Loki-”

Loki pulled up his mask and glared.

“No, Anthony. I am not putting this off. We’re doing this now. Take off your mask and talk to me.”

“Damn it, Loki,” Anthony cursed, but he did lift his mask. “We need to forget about that.”

“Why?” Loki demanded, feeling hurt but refusing to let it show. “You kissed me back.”

“And you’re a student.”

Loki scoffed. He couldn’t help it. “I am not a student. Not anymore. Not for years. You haven’t been treating me like one either.” He raised his eyebrows pointedly. “Try again.”

The fond amusement he had grown used to seeing whenever he was rude started to crest Anthony’s eyes only to be rapidly snuffed out. Anthony looked away.

“It’s not just… that. It’s our ages. It’s all our differences and after my break up-”

“I don’t give a shit about any of that,” Loki cut in. Anthony’s attention jerked back to him. “And you shouldn’t either.” Loki dared to step closer, their height difference feeling more pronounced as he looked down at the man. He also softened his voice. “Either you want to kiss me,” Loki murmured, “either you like me or you don’t. It’s that simple.”

Anthony stared at him. He looked incredibly vulnerable and conflicted.

“I didn’t even know we were doing this,” Anthony whispered. “That we were… that you were interested in me.”

Loki nearly laughed. He nearly admitted exactly how long he’d liked Anthony, but he knew it wouldn’t do him any favours.

“We weren’t doing anything,” Loki admitted. “And I hadn’t planned to kiss you. These weren’t dates, but I do like you.” He smirked. “Even with your terrible music, hotrod red cars and coffee addiction.”

Anthony finally smiled; he also huffed a laugh, but despite the amusement he still looked worried and he was chewing his bottom lip. And Loki understood why. Miss Potts had hurt him badly and Loki had sprung his affections on the man suddenly.

And it sobered Loki further.

“We do not have to do anything,” he said, his gaze lowering. “I would never push you to do that. But you are amazing, Anthony. And you are attractive. I have wanted to kiss you for a long time, because you are far greater than you believe you are. And I-”

He quieted when Anthony touched his arm. He caught the man’s gaze again, finding something nervous but interested within it. Hope started to race Loki’s heart and twist his stomach, and when Anthony smiled shyly, the candle within him blazed.

“I thought you were an asshole, Loki?” Anthony joked. “You’re sounding kind of sweet right now.”

Loki gave a surprised laugh. “I can be both when the right mood strikes me.”

Anthony chuckled and his hand also slid further up Loki’s arm until it ended up crossing over to his chest.

“Anthony?” he questioned.

“You’ve been staying here for me,” Anthony murmured. “We’ve been almost dating for weeks. You’ve been the only thing on my mind for just as long. I don’t know what this is or if it will work or how the hell I’m supposed to be a good choice.” He swallowed. “But I… I do like you, Loki.” He caught Loki’s gaze. “And I want to kiss you too.”

It was all the permission Loki needed. He crowded Anthony against the structure and pressed their mouths together. Anthony gasped and then groaned before gripping his shoulders. Nothing about it was a refusal and everything about it was good.

Their outfits made it difficult and they’d had to put down their guns, but Loki’s hands were on Anthony’s waist and he was kissing the man he had been desiring for weeks. Loki knew it would not be simple: that there would be questions that needed answering and Anthony’s emotional state would need further addressing, but in that moment Loki didn’t care.

He was stubborn and persistent; he could weather any storm and fight unflinchingly for what he desired. He had only ever needed a chance.

And even when he got shot in the back a few minutes later with paintballs, he didn’t feel discouraged; not when Anthony’s reaction was to laugh loudly and look uncaring of their discovery. He then simply teased him affectionally for making them lose.

It was those actions that let Loki know with certainty that no matter the difficulties, pain or frustration that followed, everything would be worth it. Because as long as Anthony Stark was smiling up at him and looking happy; Loki felt like he could do anything—like winning the heart of the man he finally held in his arms.