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Mama Thutanukul knows her boys very well. And she’s so proud of them. They are growing into amazing young men.
She is sweetest with Fiat, sweeter even than with her own two sons, but even Fiat knows this is because she’s teasing those two, making sure they don’t get too spoiled. It’s quite a different thing, to her mind, to spoil Fiat. Fiat needs to be spoiled. His childhood is too marked with sorrow and abandonment; he needs respite from that.
Fiat enjoys being spoiled. He figures that the spoiling will never last, because he’s such a fucked-up kid, so he enjoys it while he can, even gets childishly whiny when he’s not being pampered sufficiently. Leo babies him the most of all and Fiat loves being babied by Leo.
He wants to be Leo’s.
Mrs. Thutanukul also wants that for him. She wants it for both of them: Fiat and Leo. She decided long ago that they will belong to one another forever. She saw it in their interactions from the start, and understood it for what it was, even when they were too young for romantic love. She will let nothing get in the way of this relationship.
And yet there are things that Fiat needs to understand, that he hasn’t yet figured out on his own, so she takes him for dessert at their favorite restaurant, just the two of them. If Leon and Leo feel left out, too bad – they’re grownups.
As she and Fiat enjoy custard-filled rolls drizzled with chocolate, their heads lean together like two teen conspirators with scrumptious gossip to share.
“That silly overgrown boy of mine, is he treating you well?”
“He gets jealous,” Fiat says with a frown. “There’s no reason, I would never cheat. I don’t care about anyone else.”
“It’s a stage,” she says. “He needs to grow up and get past it. Meanwhile I hear that you and your family are getting along wonderfully!”
Fiat smiles. “I don’t know why I didn’t realize how cute Fa is until now.”
“Your Auntie Fay has told me about setting up new play dates with your sister,” Mrs. Thutanukul says. “Imagine that, will you play board games or puzzles? Maybe have a tea party with her squishmallows?”
Fiat giggles. “Whatever Fa wants. She’s adorable! She even likes me.” He shakes his head in wonder. “I’m over the moon all the time now.”
Mrs. Thutanukul smiles. “It’s such a good look on you, my Fiat.”
“I owe most of it to Leo, you know.”
“My Leo is very lucky to have you.”
“I’m the lucky one. It’s hard to believe it’s not a dream, everything that’s been happening.”
She places her hand on his and gives it a squeeze, then lets it go to pick up her fork again. “You will come to see, it is very real.” She takes a bite with wonderfully delicate manners. “It seems soon enough I’ll have a fourth son.”
Fiat grimaces. “Leon is such a pain about his new boyfriend. As if no one else has ever had a boyfriend before this.”
“Don’t mind him. Leon will behave if I tell him to. I like Pob very much, nonetheless; don’t you?”
Fiat considers and nods. “He’s quiet and a bit strange. But he’s better than stupid Leon.”
Mrs. Thutanukul smiles. “Leon likes to tease you but don’t let that keep you from becoming friends with Pob.”
Fiat nods again and eats another forkful of dessert. He doesn’t have her table manners, but he’s more careful than if this was Leo, whom he likes to torment by eating like a child.
“You see,” she continues, “it’s important to find the right person to match you. For example, Leo is like an anchor, steady, reliable, protective. You are like a boat bobbing on the sun-kissed ocean, dancing with the dolphins.”
Fiat giggles at the picture.
“Without the anchor, you would be at risk of floating away who knows where, into danger. The boat is free to bask in the sun because the anchor keeps it safe.” She looks carefully at her boy to see if he understands.
Fiat’s expression turns thoughtful. “Leo has done everything for me. He takes care of me no matter what horrible thing happens. He doesn’t care about all my problems. He cares about me.”
She beams. “He loves you. You see, Fiat, Leo is a great deal like Korn. That’s why I chose Korn after dating all those other boys. I knew he would always be there for me, and for our children. He is quiet yet firm in his resolve. He is a leader in his quiet way. Leo is the same – he’s always been a responsible child, and he has taken on the big-brother role for both you and Leon. He has done it willingly, eagerly. He knows that both of you can shine brighter if he protects you.”
“I hadn’t thought of it that way. He does do that. And Dad does that for you, doesn’t he? You are more like Leon.” Fiat corrects himself quickly: “Except of course you are amazing and Leon is an idiot.”
“Boisterous and flighty, that’s me and Leon!” she says with a laugh. “Think, Fiat, of that anchor. Leo is strong, he is righteous, but he’s not actually a stone. He has feelings. He can be hurt.”
“I’ve told him how much I love him!” Fiat bursts out, then glances around, embarrassed. Fortunately it’s mid-afternoon and the restaurant is not too full. “I’ve told him,” he stage-whispers.
“I’m sure you have. But Leo has less confidence than he projects. He’s strong but he’s not made of stone. There’s a soft spot hidden inside him and he saves it for those few he deeply loves – his father and brother and me and of course you – but he tries to hide that soft spot because he’s afraid of making mistakes, of being hurt.”
Fiat lays down his fork and looks determined. “You’re telling me something, Mom, and I’m trying to figure out what it is.”
She smiles warmly and waits patiently. She knows he will understand.
The waiter comes by to take the dessert plates and refill their coffee.
* * *
Fiat is grateful to Mama Thutanukul for her patience and love. Of course he comes to the right conclusion, and she’s proud of him when he does. He feels warm inside knowing that she approves of how he understands.
It’s this: Leo needs some spoiling. No one spoils him; certainly not his parents, not his teachers, not his friends, and not Fiat. They have all come to expect Leo to be tough and confident and righteous and protective. He spoils them, not the other way around.
Fiat needs to think of some marvelous thing to do for Leo. Something out of the ordinary, unexpected, really special.
He gets excited by the idea. Leo has done so much for him, from standard romantic gestures like sending him roses and punching assholes who give him grief, to doing the ugly work of standing up for Fiat in front of Uncle Mait. It’s time that Leo realizes that Fiat is an equal partner in this relationship; that Fiat can take care of Leo, too, and not just because he knows how to please a partner in bed. That’s important, but not as important as showing Leo how loved he is.
He considers taking someone into his confidence to mull over ideas. It can’t be Tho or Nam, those fools will just laugh and joke around. Aek is Leo’s friend more than his. Natsu would mock endlessly even though she means well. Anda’s probably the best choice but she scares the shit out of him even though he admires her. Leon would laugh himself sick and then tell Leo.
Mrs. Thutanukul expects Fiat to come up with the idea himself, so he can’t go to her. Mr. Thutanukul is back in town but that’s intimidating – Fiat can’t talk to him or his own father or his stepmother about this kind of thing. It’s embarrassing enough that they all know he and Leo have been sleeping together.
So it’s up to him, which, fair enough.
He plans on something before the final game but after the banquet. There’s really too much going on right now, so he has to time it perfectly.
He’s just come up with the best idea ever – a weekend at the beach, just the two of them, where he can spoil Leo with jet-ski rides and delicious food and a big room with a big bed where he can give Leo a candle-lit massage and who knows what else – and he’s hunting for Leo so that he can let him know the plan, when he rounds the corner of the Political Science building and is shocked by the sight of Leo leaning over Punn and – surely they’re not kissing?
* * *
Leon’s tuxedo is too warm and it itches. Better than the tie and tails that his poor older brother has been talked into wearing, but still. Yuck.
The banquet couldn’t be happening at a worse time. The night before, Leon had done something he’d never ever thought he would need to do: watch Leo cry and try to comfort him.
Leo! Crying of all things. The strong one who always looks out for his little brother, the one who brooks no shit from anyone when it comes to his family. It makes Leon feel like hunting down King and punching him a couple more times for good measure, like giving Punn a piece of his mind because he can’t bring himself to punch a girl, any more than Leo could.
He pulls at the collar of his shirt. He hates buttoned-up shirts.
He runs into his parents on the balcony, bantering in their friendly way over something. He wants, badly, to tell them what’s going on, but Leo won’t thank him for that.
“Leon!” cries his mother. “Your bowtie is crooked, silly boy.” She hands her champagne glass to her husband and straightens Leon’s bowtie, then pats down a piece of his hair that’s sticking out. The bowtie wilts again. She sighs.
“Korn, who dressed this boy? Haven’t you taught him how to tie a proper knot yet?” She gives a little moue of disappointment as she reclaims her champagne glass.
Korn shrugs and grins. “Where are your two other sons? The ones you wanted to show off?”
Nadia Thutanukul searches the main floor. “Leon, I’m really sad that Pob won’t be here. The suit I picked out was just perfect for his lovely complexion. He would have turned every head here tonight!”
“Pob is shy,” Leon says, feeling defensive. “He would feel uncomfortable.”
“Next time, I’ll talk him into it,” Nadia says with certainty. “At least I know that Fiat will be along soon and look simply gorgeous.”
Leon wonders if Fiat will show. He’s betting not, after what Leo told him the night before.
Nadia spies Leo, pacing along the balcony across the wide space. “Leon, go and talk some sense into your ridiculous brother! He looks like someone stole his ice cream cone.”
“Mom,” begins Leon, “Dad, I’m not sure if—“
Nadia grasps his hand. “I know they are having trouble, and your brother hasn’t decided to come to his parents about it. That means, Leon, that it’s your turn to step up and help. Go and talk to your brother. Now.”
Leon looks at his father, who nods and indicates that he should obey his mother.
He makes his way to the other side of the balcony with great reluctance. Not that he’s reluctant to help, or to let Leo cry on his shoulder (although not here, holy shit no). But this shit is totally fucked up. Leon has always understood that you have to pursue someone sometimes; you can’t just sit back and wait for your crush to come to you, because then it might never happen. You need to take action. He himself would never have gotten Pob if he hadn’t been forthright. He feels a bit bad at just how pushy he’d been – but he’d kept it polite, right? Hadn’t overstepped, not really. Had he? Well, he muses, you can’t win if you don’t play.
And that’s Leo’s problem, right there. Leo is so afraid of losing that he prefers not to play the game at all if he can help it.
Leon knows his brother fairly well. He loves and respects and even worships Leo. He also knows Leo’s flaws, which include being passive at the wrong times. Which include overindulging that stupid, pretty little boy he’s in love with, leading him to let anyone else have him. While Leo sits by with his broken heart and his stiff upper lip. Even when Fiat finally – finally! – came to be with Leo, Leon had a suspicion that something was going to go wrong. It always did with those two. For his brother’s sake, Leon had wanted it to work out, but he’s not surprised. Not at all.
He stops twenty feet from Leo. His older brother is looking at the main floor, probably searching for Fiat. His fingers fiddle with the necklace that reads Fiat’s. What was their mother thinking when she did that? Leon knows his mother is very, very smart, but how did she know, even back then? And did she foresee the latest debacle? Meanwhile, there’s Leo looking like someone stole his ice cream cone. Or like he’s at death’s door. Or like his fickle boyfriend has been doing stupid shit again.
Seriously there are times that Leon wants to kick Leo’s ass. Leo, who could have anyone, chooses instead to languish after Fiat. Much as Leon likes to tease, he doesn’t actually dislike Fiat, or even think ill of him. Fiat is just what he is, a spoilt little philanderer (no judgement, Leon knows he’s a philanderer, too), and he doesn’t deserve Leo – that’s what Leon thinks.
On the other hand, their very smart mother thinks that Fiat does deserve Leo. Bearing that in mind, Leon steels himself and goes to his brother. Time for some serious ass-kicking.
* * *
Leo deserves every bit of that talking-to he just got from his baby brother, and he knows damn well that he deserves it. His brother was actually pretty gentle, considering. His brother was also right – Leo needs to get Fiat back. He needs to at least try. He’s still shaking inside from Fiat’s dismissal (we probably should have stayed friends in the first place) when Punn shows up. He shoves the necklace inside his shirt fast. He doesn’t want to share anything about Fiat with her. That kiss was gross. He still can’t believe he did that. Sometimes he acts so irresponsible when it involves Fiat; it’s like his brain goes offline.
He steps back, not wanting her near. And then a miracle happens and Anda is at his side, taking his arm, putting Punn in her place as only Anda can.
“Let’s go,” she says, leading the way to the stairwell. It’s his job to greet guests and it will be easier with a friend at his side.
A small commotion on the main floor catches his eye, along with a flash of color.
Fiat.
Leo stops short and stares.
Fiat, who is looking straight up at him.
Anda is at his elbow again. “Come on, man up. He came because of you. Don’t disappoint him again.”
Leo feels eyes on him. He glances up and sees his parents, still across the balcony, gazing at him with soft smiles. He squares his shoulders and tucks Anda’s arm through his.
“Okay,” he says. “Okay.”