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Three hundred years.
He wondered what was it all for.
When Amane and Haruka were still among the living, he felt like a new man, a free man. He finally was no longer a creature bound by bestial instincts, but just a normal human man who would help run Cafe Jacaranda. He was a normal person who would soften up over the years, his scowl dulling a bit, and his rare smile shining that much brighter.
At least, he was, for a little while. Humanity, even at its finest, was still fragile. To him, it felt like no time had passed at all, but when he looked over at Amane, just as they were closing, he froze. No longer was she a little girl, but she was growing up into a fine young woman. When he looked away, catching his reflection in the glass he was cleaning, he saw not a single added wrinkle or grey hair. He was so swept up in the euphoria of his new life that he had forgotten a very important thing: no matter how much love he held in his heart for those around him, and no matter how much he looked like them, he was still an Undead, immortal and unchanging. He knew that he would eventually need to say goodbye, and that the longer he stayed, the more suspicious he would seem.
It seemed like no time at all had passed since then, since he abandoned them, since he tried to come back, just to be rebuffed by Amane, since he ended up at the Domed City, and since he was finally free from the Admiral's grasp.
Instinctively, he reached into his coat pocket, hoping the image Kurihara had given him so long ago was still there, but he felt nothing but dust and dirt. He remembered how the colors eventually faded, their faces warping, the corners tearing, the gloss cracking with each repeated fold, eroding into smaller and smaller pieces until eventually there was nothing left.
Before him was nothing but sand, dunes and dunes of sand, and a rising sun beginning to beat down upon him. He had no idea how far away he was from the City, nor how he even arrived to this barren wasteland. Nothing for him to do but keep moving forward.
Kenzaki coughed and coughed until the dark seawater, mixed with green blood, stained the sand beneath him. His arms struggled to keep themselves up, wobbling until he threw himself onto his back. He had no idea where he was, or how he even got there. There were shadows of people in his foggy memory, smaller shadows playing amongst themselves, and larger shadows, some drinking at a hazy bar, some gesturing wildly. What were their names? He remembered holding some of the shadows close, he remembered crying with them, he remembered walking with them, talking with them, but he couldn't remember anything else.
Slowly sitting up just enough for his back to be off the ground, he shed his shirt, leaving a thoroughly soaked tank top underneath. Laying back down, he placed the shirt over his eyes, hoping the headache beginning to form between his eyes would fade.
Every time he tried to remember it hurt him more than anything else. A million darkroaches descending onto him could not even begin to compare to the pain his gaping memory gave him. All he had left was his belt, his Rouzer, his cards, and his name. It was a miracle he could even remember to use them, let alone still fight.
When he felt dry enough, he stood up, pulling the shirt from his eyes and wrapping it around his waist. He looked to the angry sea, black waves crashing on top of one another, debris strewn some distance away. His gaze then moved to the endless desert stretching before him. Though he didn't mind a watery grave, he knew it better to just keep moving forward.
Forward and forward they moved, until the sun was high above the sky.
In the distance Hajime saw something, a speck held onto the horizon, slowly growing in size as he trudged forward, its form becoming more defined. Though he did not have the limits of a human body, he wondered if the sun and the heat could still play tricks on his eyes. He had heard of mirages before, but they were usually of an oasis, taunting the thirsty and hungry with its splendor.
He had been walking through the sand for some time, just trying to move forward and away from his former captors, be he wondered if he was just walking in circles. There hadn't been a single living soul since he touched onto land, and with most of the world submerged, there shouldn't be an island with this much land to begin with, especially not so close to Antarctica.
Was it just a dream? If he closed his eyes, would they open to the sterile, halogen lights dotting the ceilings of the Admiral's lab?
Kenzaki made his way down a particularly steep dune, only to trip, rolling down on his sides. He didn't do anything to slow his decent or even to land more gracefully than he did, instead falling directly on his face, letting himself be caked in sand. He lay there for what seemed like hours, tears from his pores and his eyes mixed as the sun continued to beat down on him. As he rolled over onto his back, he wondered what it was all for. Even if he could remember anything else, anyone he could consider a loved one was long, long gone. The world was on the precipice of ruin, living as long he did would not prevent its tumble into the abyss.
He laid there, hoping eventually, he would erode into nothing.
Eventually, he turned his head towards the horizon, lazily moving his arm up to shield his view from the sun. He wondered if too much sand got into his eyes, because he saw something moving his way.
As Hajime neared the figure, he saw it slide down a dune, kicking up enough sand to make a small storm. The winds began to pick up a bit around the same time, which further obscured the object in the distance. He refused to lose whatever it was now, and started running.
It had to be a mirage, for if it were anything else, he would lose himself, or what was left of himself. As he made his way, and as the winds died down, he saw the figure turn its head towards him. Even caked in dirt and dust, even after three hundred years, he recognized them immediately. They had long auburn hair, some of which covered their eyes, some of stubble, and a bit of a pout. He stopped in his tracks when the pout disappeared into a smile. Hajime fell to his knees. If this was a mirage, then he wanted nothing more to plunge into his insanity, pretending whatever actually held this form would indulge him.
They both stayed as they were, the land around them silent except for the wind whistling in their ears. Hajime was filled to the brim with a million words, but his lips stayed tightly shut and his tongue stayed pressed firmly against his teeth. The breeze was enough to push some strands of hair from Kenzaki's face, revealing those kind, sad, deep brown eyes. Hajime remembered how they lit up as he ate some of his rice porridge, how happy they were when he thanked Kenzaki for saving him, and how determined they were when Kenzaki told Tachibana that he believed in him, despite his true nature. It seemed like so long ago and like it happened yesterday all at once.
The constant headaches that plagued Kenzaki slowly ebbed away. When he smiled it felt like he used a muscle long since atrophied, it hurt just a bit. He opened his mouth to speak, but his tongue felt swollen, his throat cinched tight. Normally those would be signs of dehydration, but he didn't need to eat, drink, sleep, or dream. It must have been nerves, or a sign he shouldn't say anything at all. He didn't sense any Undead nearby, so this couldn't be Hajime. He still wore that same outfit, the coat, jeans, and all, there's no way those clothes could survive that long. He knew Undead didn't age, but nothing about the being that stood before him seemed even the slightest bit different. He flashed the phantom of his close friend a bright smile.
Hajime inched just a bit closer, now crawling on his hands and knees, until the mirage was just out of reach. He sat cross legged next to them.
Kenzaki turned onto his side, resting his head on his hand, never breaking eye contact, closing the distance between them just a bit more.
Time continued on in silence until the sun began to decend in the distance and hide behind the clouds, turning the sky a haunting orange.
Hajime was terrified the dying light would steal this dream from him, and spoke first.
"Kenzaki?"
Hearing his name spoken by the apparition was music to his ears, a symphony for his heart. He closed his eyes, breathing deeply, and soaking it in before responding in kind.
"Hajime."
Hajime balled up his fists in response, pressing them into his lap. He knew it was just a dream, but there was still a rage storming in his heart, though it was not the rage of his true nature. It was a sorrowful rage, a regret buried deep within. More than anything, he wished he had been sealed away centuries ago, because seeing what his mind's eye conjured was torture. He preferred an eternal prison just so Kenzaki could have lived a fleeting but ultimately happy life, blissfully ignorant of humanity's self-inflicted destruction. Even if he wasn't laying before him, he was out there, moving from island to island, suffering more than any living being should endure. And it was all his fault.
"I'm sorry." Even if he was talking to the wind, he needed to say something.
Kenzaki felt his stomach twist. "You apologizing? That's a new one."
Hajime's scowl moved from a deep frown into a more relaxed smile.
Kenzaki paused, watching the phantom's features contort before continuing. "I'm sorry too."
"This isn't your fault."
"This isn't yours either."
Hajime glared. Kenzaki chuckled.
"How have you been?"
He wanted to respond, just to hear his voice again, but what could he say? After centuries, the memories would fade into one another.
"What about you?"
"Dodging the question, huh...can't say I know how to answer that." He chuckled. Kenzaki moved from his laying position to match Hajime, sitting up, one knee bent upwards, and the other bent to the side.
Hajime scoffed. Now that he could see the other better, he noticed how tired he looked. Nothing changed much about his physical appearance outside of his clothes, but his eyes no longer had that youthful luster, dulled by the waves of time.
Kenzaki blinked a couple of times before meeting Hajime's gaze. "I missed you."
That's what Hajime wanted to hear, but until it was actually Kenzaki before him, it felt a bit hollow. Still, he responded, hoping somehow that the wind would carry his words to the other's ears. "I missed...you too."
Kenzaki moved a hand to his necklace, squeezing it tight in surprise. He didn't think Hajime, the man who couldn't even be direct with him in his dreams, would respond in kind. He pulled down on the chain, easily snapping it off. He laid it on the sand like one would an offering.
As Kenzaki moved to pull his hand back, Hajime scooped a bit of sand on top of it, covering it completely. He acted before thinking, forgetting about the possibility that the mirage would just disappear, and all that would remain was a small hill of sand.
A layer of tightly packed grains kept palms and fingertips away from one another. If there was even the smallest chance that this was not his imagination, they couldn't touch each other. Even so, he could feel the other's warmth through the sand, maybe it was because the sun had been beating down on it all day, but it felt so real.
Kenzaki understood, though he pressed even harder. He wanted to feel his warmth, not the sand's, not what his brain thought Hajime felt like, but the real, flesh and blood Aikawa Hajime. To his dismay he realized, this would have to do, for now.
Kenzaki wanted nothing more than to go back, just to be able to be with Hajime again. He would catch and release Undead until the end of time if it meant the Joker would never return. He cursed himself for being so weak, for not being able to handle the hordes of Darkroaches that infested Japan.
Kenzaki grabbed another handful of sand, mesmerized as it piled on the back of Hajime's hand. Hajime understood immediately and spread it around, careful not to touch the other. Kenzaki packed the layer tight, as Hajime grabbed one more handful and pressed it against the bottom of Kenzaki's hand. It was an incredibly bizarre display, but they both knew, if this was truly real, it'd be over in an instant. Though it couldn't be real, even being within viewing distance of one another should have been enough to bring back both Jokers, and neither sensed the Undead in the other.
"The sand's kinda itchy."
Hajime smiled. It had been so long, he thought he would have forgotten how by now. "I know."
After some time, they gingerly pulled their hands away from each other, slightly damp sand falling between them.
It was now well into the night, with the three moons hanging above them, their combined light piercing the dark blue, and overshadowing some of the stars.
"Is this real?"
Hajime wasn't sure how to answer.
"It can't be real, right, we'd be at each other's necks if it was....right?"
"What if it is?"
"Then maybe..." Kenzaki couldn't meet his eyes. "Maybe I'd risk it."
Though he thought his rage had quelled, those words brought it back to a boil. "And throw everything away? Is that what you want?"
Kenzaki's eyes dulled again. "Everyone we know, everyone we've ever loved is long dead." He saw flashes of those kids from the Ark in his mind. "Everything's completely messed up anyway. You telling me this is how the rest of them should live?"
"That's not your decision to make."
"Too late for that now, isn't it?" Kenzaki slid forward.
"Don't come any closer!" Hajime barked, rising to his feet. This tragedy would play out again and again.
"They're all shacked up on rotting boats, or on islands that'll be gone soon, killing each other for nothing. There's that City that's a glorified coffin for the rich. Is that what humanity deserves?" Kenzaki was crying now, a palm digging into one of his eyes.
Hajime's eyes began to water. "No, but if we fight, then they won't have a chance."
"They don't have a goddamn chance in hell! Don't you get it?"
Hajime, despite his best efforts, let Kenzaki get the better of him, as he rushed to grab the tank top, ripping it in the process. Kenzaki let him, the tatters remaining in the other's hand.
This was no illusion, and it was far too late to stop it. Kenzaki realizing the same, closed the distance between them, wrapping his arms around Hajime. Hajime froze, tears now flooding his face. He wrapped his arms around Kenzaki's waist, as the other rested his chin on his head.
The end of the world lay at their feet and all they could do was smile, tears staining the sand.