Chapter Text
Superheroes suck. Some may argue that they save the world or whatever but Dream hates them and will never change his mind. They weren’t saviours, they were homewreckers. Literally. The internal rant in Dream’s head went on as he attempted to scavenge for his phone in the debris of what used to be his ceiling. A hunk of metal, that he could only guess came from a spaceship, was sitting in the middle of the room right under a giant hole. Dream always wished for a skylight but this is not what he meant. Maybe he should’ve been more specific in his wishing or maybe some so called superhero shouldn’t drop their shit on top of his apartment. Either way there was no way he could live in this building anymore.
After finally finding his phone and cursing a bit more over the cracked screen, Dream called his most trusted friend.
Unfortunately for Sapnap, he was that friend. Don’t get him wrong he loves his friend, especially Dream, but he just isn’t the biggest fan of Dream’s hour long rants late at night. When he first heard there was a battle happening near where Dream lived, he panicked and left multiple texts and calls. When Dream finally replied and informed him it was blocks away and he would be fine, Sapnap finally let himself relax and go to bed. However, his sleep quickly ended as he found himself driving as fast as he could into the city to Dream’s apartment.
“It’s not fair, I just got new curtains last week as well. I bet they knew that and wanted to wreck them”
“I know it’s not fair, Dream and I’m sorry about your curtains but something tells me they didn’t know about them.”
“They totally did! I should have listened to mum, she always said how much she hated the design and that I shouldn’t buy them.”
“I liked them.”
“I’m being selfish, aren’t I?”
“You’re upset and justifiably so.”
“People got hit worse I just lost a ceiling.”
“Well, it’s still not great, you can be upset.”
“No one else in my building was affected, just me…” Dream trailed off going into his own thoughts for a second.
“Well, that’s good at least.”
“No, that’s a conspiracy.”
Sapnap wanted to hit his head off the wheel multiple times. He doesn’t and will never understand why Dream believes that all superheroes are against him. They probably don’t even know who he is but, that doesn’t stop Dream’s imagination creating conspiracies against him. There are currently nine ongoing conspiracies against Dream, all of them including Supers and all of them being absolute bullshit.
“Out of all people why me though? They could’ve hit Noisy Nicole or Creepy Chris but they hit me. In another universe I’m sitting at home right now with a full ceiling living in peace not having to worry about hearing any of Nichole’s break ups or Chris’ strange noises. I still don’t know what he was up to last week and I don’t want to know but those noises were not natural.”
“Well now you get to live with the best flatmate who promises to stop and get you ice-cream from McDonalds.” Sapnap prayed he wouldn’t end up with a
At that Dream finally crumbles from the stress of everything. His anger quickly leaving him as tears start to form in his eyes.
“You’d really do that?” He sniffles a bit trying to act like he’s not about to cry over ice-cream
“What? Of course, it’s just ice- “Sapnap stopping when from the corner of his eye he catches Dream wiping away tears.
“Are you crying?”
“Pfft of course not, your accusation is insulting.”
“You’ve been through a lot tonight, it’s normal to show emotion you know?” Sapnap says as he finally makes it to the nearest drive though. However, instead of going straight through, he parks in a space near the back of the car park.
Turning towards Dream he pulls him into a hug. Slightly awkward due to being in a car but it’s apparently all Dream needed as he started to really cry. Shoulders shaking as Sapnap tried his best to comfort him, one hand running through his hair and the other squeezing him tight.
“It could have killed me.”
“I know but it didn’t and you’re here now so let’s not think about that right now, okay? You’re safe and alive.”
“They could’ve killed Patches. I don’t even know what I would do without her.” Dream’s crying got heavier with the thought of living without his Patches. “I just want to hold her.”
“How about this then, I’ll get patches from the back so you can cuddle her while I run in and get our ice-cream and we can eat it in the car and take a moment to calm down.”
“Yeah, okay I’d like that.”
The rest of the drive went fast after that. Dream fell asleep five minutes after leaving the car park and Sapnap drove in silence taking a longer route that avoided potholes so that Dream could have a decent sleep.
By the time they got to Sapnap’s apartment Dream was still asleep and the sun was starting to rise. Not wanting to wake his slumbering friend Sapnap decided to gather his strength and carry him inside to his bed. He may have had to stop a few times but apparently Dream was a deep sleeper who could sleep through nearly being dropped twice.
Once Dream was safe in his bed Sapnap ran back down to get Patches from her travel carrier in the car. Walking back to the house whispering to Patches about her new living conditions stopping off at the kitchen to give her a treat before opening the carrier to let her out. Seemingly understanding everything Sapnap said she immediately ran up to lie next to Dream in Sapnap’s room.
Making his own way towards the sofa with a spare cover in hand he checked the doors were locked and the lights were off. Pausing outside his bedroom to check that Dream and Patches were sound asleep. He was happy to sacrifice his bed for as long as Dream needed, he would sacrifice his whole apartment if it made the smile come back to his face.
Sapnap has always given off the impression that he doesn’t care about the Supers. Never engaging in the debates about them nor did he encourage any conversation surrounding them. Always managing to avoid the topic to the point people gave up trying to figure out his stance on it.
In reality Sapnap really didn’t care. He took life as it is and dealt with it. If that means that every other year aliens would attack and people who somehow got superpowers would save them then that’s what’s going to happen. Sapnap knew he couldn’t change how the supers worked so he wasn’t going to bother and try.
As much as he doesn’t believe the dumb conspiracies Dream makes up, he can’t deny the misfortune he has faced with the Supers. He can’t imagine losing everything Dream has lost due to the intergalactic fights that seem to always happen in Earth’s atmosphere. He’s lost his favourite bike, a car and now an apartment due to flying debris. Dream has a talent of being in the wrong place and the wrong time. Maybe there is a conspiracy after all or maybe it’s 5am and the couch is slightly less comfy than he remembers it being. Sapnap tries to shut his brain down to get at least a bit of rest before he has to get up and lug all Dream’s stuff from the car.
The next day went about just as well as the last with Dream’s landlord telling him he won’t be able to move back in basically ever resulting in another panic from Dream and another ice-cream run. This time the two of them settled on the sofa and watched shit tv until Patches started to meow by the door to get out.
“Hey c’mon now no need to shout I’m getting the door now.”
Sapnap said opening the door coming back to flop back on the couch, legs landing on top of Dreams lap. The blonde turned to give him a confused look, “how are you so good with Patches?” Sapnap stiffened.
oh shit he knows, “What do you mean?”
“She listens to you like she can actually understand you.”
“She’s the same with you!” trying to laugh off the situation.
“Jesus, I wish she was. I just want her to stop climbing on my keyboard.” Dream sighed joining in on the laughter a bit.
Relaxing again Sapnap put his attention towards the tv trying to find anything better to watch.
“Oh! Put on Super Mundane it’s on at 5 please it’s the best!”
Super Mundane was a reality show all about following people who have superpowers but their powers are rather mundane. This episode followed a woman who could change the colours of her clothes but only if she was wearing them. Dream loved the program and would comment on nearly every scene. There’s little Sapnap wouldn’t do for Dream anyway but seeing him get so excited over a terrible tv show made him want stay in the moment forever. Nothing sounded better than sitting with Dream, eating ice-cream and laughing at the tv.
I think I love him.