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“I can’t believe you actually wrecked my bike,” Eddie muttered, running a frustrated hand through his short hair before settling on cupping the back of his neck. It was a feeble attempt at self-soothing that had little to no effect. “You sure are a petty bitch.”
It was well-deserved. I will not apologize. Venom paused, then added as an afterthought, And I am not a bitch.
Eddie wrinkled his nose, doing his best to quell the spark of annoyance those words had spurred. He reached down and picked up a dented piece of metal from the assorted pile that had once been his only mode of transportation. There was no sense reliving their stupid fight just because Venom was too stubborn for his own good. Quite frankly, Eddie would rather act like it had never happened at all.
“You realize how much money it’s going to cost to fix this, don’t you?” Eddie started, then closed his mouth as he further surveyed the damage. Dropping the metal back atop the heap of clutter, he sighed deeply and leaned his head against the rough brick wall behind him. “Jesus, it’s not worth fixing . . . I’m going to have to get a new one.”
You shouldn’t waste our money, Eddie, Venom spoke in disagreement, his tone oddly obstinate. Even after all this time, Eddie still wasn’t completely used to the way Venom’s gravelly voice rumbled around his skull. I say good riddance to that garbage. Weren’t you embarrassed to be seen on such a puny contraption, when every time you did so, you wasted untapped power and agility by forcing me to stay suppressed inside of you? I am much faster than any motorcycle. I was embarrassed for you. It was a total eyesore.
“You know, have I ever told you I admire your humility? No, really. It’s one of your best qualities.”
Are you mocking me?
Eddie laughed, though there was little energy behind it. “Never.”
Venom hummed skeptically, but remained patient as his host tore his eyes away from the rain clouds overhead, realization dawning on him.
“And garbage?” Eddie parroted, somewhat affronted. He scrutinized what was left of his motorcycle at his feet. “You’re seriously calling my bike garbage? It’s not garbage. Why are you saying - Well, OK, it wasn’t garbage, till you smashed it to pieces like a fucking five year old throwing a fit.”
The chill in the air was a telltale sign that rain would soon be upon them. Suddenly, Eddie wished he’d brought a jacket with him. But when the adrenaline had left his body from his clash with Cletus, and he’d been given time to catch his breath, he’d been out his door in a flurry when the memory of his discarded bike on the street came to the forefront.
“Also, what do you mean ‘our’ money? It’s my money. Whose name do you think is the one on the paystub,” Eddie demanded, despite having no real bite to his words. The idea of arguing with Venom right now left a sour taste at the base of his tongue. After the events of the last few days, he’d been left boneless and tired, sapped of even the anger that had propelled him earlier at the sight of his expensive television being hurled out the window.
It’s our money, Venom adamantly countered, hovering just beneath the surface of Eddie’s skin as he kicked what was left of the motorcycle with his shoe. He could feel the distant echoes of Venom's dissatisfaction at Eddie’s complete disregard for him. Without me, those bodies would still be hidden under the sand on that beach. I was the hero! You admitted it! It is my money just as it is yours.
“Alright, alright. Can we not-" Eddie said, withering somewhat as lone raindrops began to raise goosebumps on his bare arms, too exhausted to rehash another session of bickering. “Not do this right now, OK? I wasn’t trying to discount your help. You were very helpful, Venom.”
At the watered down praise, Eddie felt the restless itching underneath his skin gradually recede. Thank god for that, because he wasn’t so sure he could handle the overwhelming sensation of Venom’s true ire at this moment in time. As good as he’d gotten at turning Venom’s emotions into white noise in the background of his day to day life, Eddie couldn’t say he was most effective at it when his alien companion experienced an emotion too powerful to keep to himself.
Anger was definitely something he needed more practice tuning out.
You’re ill-prepared, even though you looked at the weather forecast this morning, Venom commented as Eddie, now soaked, jogged through his apartment lobby doors. He ducked his head sheepishly when meeting the curious eyes of a neighbor retrieving her mail, beelining for the stairs. What has you so distracted?
“Should I recap the last few minutes?" Eddie asked, snorting humorlessly as he took the stairs two at a time. He juggled his keys free with numb fingers, relishing the warmth of his apartment when he was completely behind closed doors.
The bike?
At the genuine confusion coating Venom’s words, Eddie clenched his jaw. Peeling the drenched shirt clinging to his torso over his head, he tossed it to the side with the intent on making his way to the bathroom. He needed to thaw all of his extremities in the most blistering water his shower could supply.
“C’mon, buddy. Gotta be faster on the uptake. If we want to continue making money,” he explained, twisting the shower nozzle until a spray of mist erupted from the groaning pipe above. “Our money,” he peppered in for easy brownie points. “Then I need a vehicle. Tomorrow we’re going out to buy another one before some other stress-inducing assignment rears its ugly head on me. Another bike you don’t get to touch, might I add.”
Is public transportation not efficient enough? Venom challenged as Eddie stepped into the tub.
Eddie hummed quietly, warm water trickling down his frozen body and loosening the tension in his shoulders. Venom shuddered with brief satisfaction in unison at the relaxing blanket of liquid engulfing them.
“Not for the whole Bay, no. You know the bus schedules are completely useless just as much as I do. Don’t even get me started on the BART.”
There are cab drivers everywhere, Eddie. We passed five on the way home.
“I’m not paying for cabs every day, are you crazy?” Eddie dismissed the suggestion in favor of shutting his eyes and turning his face to the spray. The distraction of the heat was just enough stimulation to drown out the growing swirl of something muddy building somewhere deep inside of him. “A bike is the most convenient thing for us. My wallet’s going to take a hit for a bit, but, at this point, that can’t be changed.”
If it isn’t urgent, I don’t see the point in making a large purchase so soon. You don’t even have work lined up. Our schedule is empty, Venom supplied after a lull of silence. The water continued to beat down on Eddie’s face. Are you listening, Eddie?
In response, Eddie gave a half-hearted grunt. “If you were that concerned about our finances, then you probably should’ve thought about that before you demolished our only way of getting around.”
He hadn’t meant it as a jab, honestly. It had come out more on instinct than to spitefully rebuke Venom and force him to feel shame for his previous behaviour. This weird sudden fixation on his obliterated motorcycle was starting to become a tedious topic of discussion when all Eddie wanted to do was melt into the heat of the shower after such a shitty week.
Without warning, the hot stream over Eddie’s face turned icy. He shrieked, throwing himself back and losing his footing on the slippery tub. Before he could experience the bruising pain of tumbling over the lip and hitting the tiled floor, an agile tentacle fimly clasped around his hips, pulling him back into the shower.
Eddie shivered, shuddering in Venom’s steady hold, somewhat in shock. He hovered in the small sliver of free space on the periphery of the glacial torrent shooting out of his showerhead.
Blinking the water from his lashes, it was then that Eddie spotted the cause for his impromptu scare. Another black tentacle was wrapped around the cold water tap. It took a delayed moment to process what had happened; another to react.
Irritation had Eddie twisting in the hold around his waist. He stiffened as he thrust himself under the freezing water long enough to turn it off.
Huffing in the now silent bathroom, trembling, vulnerable and nude, in his stained bathtub, Eddie could no longer allow himself the luxury of ignoring his internal roommate.
“Hey, what is your problem?” he demanded, voice booming in the small space, a tad higher pitched and manic in his rekindled annoyance. He spun around, but was only met with a black shadow seeping back under his skin.
It was really hard to yell at someone when one couldn’t see a face to yell at.
You. You aren’t trying to compromise at all, Venom explained, almost sounding . . . hesitant? Yet at the same time, characteristically petulant.
Eddie continued to stare at the blank shower tiles, his gaze darting from droplet to droplet while he tried to make sense of the situation. “Compromise with what? We weren’t bartering.”
We were, Venom contended, a surge of energy threatening to burst free from Eddie’s skin. Venom did not emerge, however, for whatever reason he had yet to divulge. You’re just too stupid to listen properly.
“Oh. Wow, OK, yeah, now you bring out the insults.” Eddie quickly wiped the remaining water from his face with a frustrated sweep of his hands. Having a fight while nude, in the unwelcoming quiet of a bathroom, was the last thing Eddie wanted to do tonight. The tentacle against his slick skin wasn’t helping him keep focus any, either.
“Look, I wasn’t trying to guilt you for breaking my bike-”
I don’t feel guilty.
Eddie bit his lip and blew a puff of air from his nostrils, making sure to keep his cool, even at the insensitive interruption. He attempted to abandon the shower, preferring the warmth of old pajamas over the growing chill air-drying in the tub. Venom refused to give, Eddie unable to maneuver himself out of the strong grip of the tentacle.
He huffed.
“Can I get out, please?” he asked, pathetically gesturing toward the bathroom door. Venom remained silent for another beat before reluctantly letting Eddie out of his grasp.
As Eddie shuffled through his messy nightstand drawers, his mood all but soured, Venom’s restless energy brewing in his gut was not lost on him.
“I need a vehicle, Venom . . . ,” he muttered quietly to the room, after dressing in a cotton shirt and sweats. The back of his neck was still moist at the base of his hairline, a discomfort left from his disrupted shower. “There’s not much to compromise there.”
Venom remained silent.
“If you’re worried about money, alright, it’s fine. It comes and goes,” Eddie continued, heading towards his bed, turning off lights along the way and side-stepping objects littered about the messy floor. Mental note to self: set a reminder to deep clean the shit out of his apartment later. “We’ll make it up down the line and then some, OK?”
Silence.
“It’s safer and faster to have your own vehicle, anyway. Especially at night. C’mon, bud. You should know that more than anyone. We’ve seen what kind of people come out around here when the sun goes down.”
Finally, this bolstered a reaction.
It doesn’t matter who is around or how safe a bike is if the driver lacks precaution.
Perhaps he hadn’t been paying close enough attention to their earlier conversation on the street. Or perhaps it had been the strange tone in which Venom spoke, saying something simultaneously underneath his comment that he somehow seemed unwilling to put into words - Eddie wasn’t sure. Whatever it was, though, had him stilling, frozen half-bent over his mattress, scratchy quilt held open with one hand.
Thoughts flew through Eddie’s mind, memories, trying to decipher the meaning behind Venom’s words. Venom noticed, a subdued tremble to his movements, now.
“Wait . . .” Eddie muttered, slowly righting himself. He glanced towards the window, hearing nothing but the soft sound of rain and a siren in the distance. “Is this about - Is this new dislike of my motorcycle about -”
Without much preamble, Venom flung Eddie into bed like he was handling a flimsy children’s doll. Eddie’s face hit the pillow with a grunt, twisting in turn to have his quilt thrown over his head. When he clawed to finally poke his head free, the last light was promptly flicked off. A black tentacle briefly shone in the darkness in the trickle of light from the street before dissolving into the darkness. Eddie felt the point under his ribs where Venom withdrew.
“Thanks for the concern and everything, but, uh, you know that was an isolated thing, right?” Eddie said to the darkness, choosing his words carefully for such a sensitive subject, if his guess was correct. “I’m not . . . going to really do something like that again, you know?”
Silence.
Eddie wet his lips, raising his eyebrows. “You know that, right?”
You are impulsive when you are hurting, Eddie, Venom spoke, sounding almost angry at having to accept this reality. Do you think having something to facilitate your self-destruction is a wise choice?
So that was it. There it was, out in the open. Where Eddie had been quick to dismiss Venom’s behavior as a juvenile outburst, he had failed to question why Venom had done what he’d done.
Shifting against his sheets and putting his back to his headboard for some support, Eddie tried to calm his fraying nerves. Venom actually thought he’d kill himself and leave him behind? He wasn’t suicidal, but that one slipup had apparently left an impression on Venom that he was.
“That’s why I have you, don’t I? You wouldn’t let me do something so reckless, so why the sudden worry?” Eddie sat in the shared silence, his fingers curling a little anxiously into the sheets at his side as a quiet bubble of laughter made it up his throat. It was a miracle he was able to speak what next tumbled out of his mouth. “Unless you’re not planning on sticking around or something-”
The words hadn’t fully left his mouth before a tarp of black exploded from his skin, wrapping around his arms and torso with an alarming force, pinning him to the headboard like a taxidermy moth for display. The wood made a concerning thud against the wall. Eddie hoped his neighbor wasn’t going to submit another noise complaint on him.
“Your jokes are not funny!” Venom boomed. Two slivers of white formed and hovered in front of Eddie, now, glaring at him. Teeth glittered in the residual streetlight, adding to the ominous picture of a floating head painting itself in front of him. “Of course I’m not leaving. Never again, Eddie. Never. And you cannot kick me out. I would like to see you try.”
At the regret in Venom’s admission, disguised misleadingly as anger, Eddie relaxed in the suffocating hold. He hadn’t realized this entire time, but he’d needed to hear that out loud from Venom. Needed to know they weren’t going to separate again over some stupid fight.
“Good,” he whispered back. “Me either, bud.”
Venom’s hold gradually loosened at Eddie’s reassurance, allowing him free from the headboard to slide down the mattress. Hell, maybe Venom had needed to hear it, too.
“I still need a vehicle, though,” Eddie admitted, after settling silently against his pillow for twenty minutes. Smooth gel filled between the gaps of his fingers until they solidified. A sturdy hold. Eddie curled his fingers over Venom’s. “I trust you. When you’re here with me, you don’t have to worry, alright? So trust me, too.”
I trust you, Eddie.
Deep within, Eddie could feel that to be true. The best feeling in the world, nothing could beat it.
Eddie squeezed Venom’s hand and slept.