Work Text:
2:45 PM
[Incoming Call from kang!! mfing!! saebyeok!! ]
Jiyeong furrows her eyebrows at her phone. It’s strange for her roommate slash best friend slash hottest-girl-in-the-world-that-she-kind-of-sort-of-has-a-crush-on to be calling at this time. Her class today ends at three, and Saebyeok is a stickler for the rules for something like this.
Quickly shutting the lid of her laptop, Jiyeong sits up, answering the call.
“Saebyeok?”
“Hey. I hate to ask this, but I’m floored by this stupid calculus problem.”
Jiyeong snorts. “And you’re calling me for help?”
She hears a sigh from the other line, and she can practically feel Saebyeok rolling her eyes at her.
“Of course not, dumbass ,” Saebyeok deadpans. “Shoot me if I ever do, by the way,” she adds for good measure.
That earns her an offended gasp from Jiyeong. “Jerk. Anyway, what’s up?”
“I need to go to my prof’s office hours after class to ask for help, but I was supposed to pick Cheol up from school today. If you’re not busy, could you pick him up and take him to our apartment? Mom will get him tonight.”
Jiyeong squeals in excitement. “Are you kidding? I’d love to! Anything for the better Kang sibling.”
“Shut up,” Saebyeok grumbles. “He gets off at three-thirty and his school is fifteen minutes away from there. I’ll text you the address.”
Jiyeong makes a sound of acknowledgement, putting Saebyeok on speaker and setting an alarm on her phone. It’ll be her first time meeting her younger brother, though Saebyeok speaks highly of him.
She knows she’ll love him no matter what he’s like.
And she’s one hundred and ten percent determined to make him love her, too.
Suddenly, a thought occurs to Jiyeong, and she pouts. “Hey, that means you’ll miss my first time meeting Cheol.”
Saebyeok scoffs. “Well, that wouldn’t matter since he’s the better Kang anyway, right? ”
“Hey,” Jiyeong complains, “this is important. It’s like a milestone, meeting your best friend’s family.”
“Oh so now we’re best friends.”
“Saebyeok!” Jiyeong complains, then a wave of self-consciousness washes through her. “Should I bring a cake? Ice cream? Cause y’know, first impressions.”
To her surprise, Saebyeok chuckles ever so softly at that, and Jiyeong wants to melt.
“Not necessary. Just take him back to the apartment and hang out with him till I get there.”
“Got it.” Jiyeong’s totally buying him some ice cream on the way to the school.
There’s some shuffling on Saebyeok’s end. “I have to go. See you two at home.”
Jiyeong hums in agreement. “Mmm. See you.”
iMessage
Today 2:58 PM
[ji] 2:58pm
wait how will cheol know what i look like?
[kang!! mfing!! saebyeok!!] 2:58pm
I sent him a picture of you.
[ji] 2:58pm
awwww 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
[ji] 2:59pm
wait
[ji] 2:59pm
what picture
[kang!! mfing!! saebyeok!!] 3:00pm
[ji] 3:00pm
PLSSSSS WHY THAT ONE 💀💀
[ji] 3:00pm
WHAT AM I EVEN DOING
[ji] 3:00pm
SAEBYEOKKKKKKKK
[ji] 3:01pm
HE PROBABLY THINKS I’M NUTS
[kang!! mfing!! saebyeok!!] 3:01pm
I thought you looked happy in that one.
[kang!! mfing!! saebyeok!!] 3:01pm
Have to go to office hours now, later.
[ji] 3:02pm
asjsidfsdsjsidf ok bye
[ji]
love u
A little less than half an hour later, Jiyeong finds herself leaning against her car, which was parked a few feet away from Cheol’s elementary school. Two Drumsticks sit in her hand, and she’s rocking back and forth on her heels, apprehensive for when the clock hits three-thirty. Jiyeong has never sought a kid’s approval more in her entire life.
Jiyeong almost wants to laugh at her predicament, really. Going through everything she’s gone through with a brave face, only to be shaking like a leaf at the thought of a ten year-old boy not liking her.
Before she can dwell on it more and drive herself to the ground with worry, the school bell rings, and a wave of children burst through the doors.
In an instant, she spots a head of dark hair and a Hot Wheels backpack, and Jiyeong knows she’s found him from the pictures Saebyeok’s shown her. He’s looking down slightly, but Jiyeong can recognize him anywhere. It seems like he spots her, too, because he’s walking in her direction.
Jiyeong gives him an easy smile, trying not to burst in excitement while also trying not to throw up out of nervousness. When she reaches him, he’s still looking down. Hm. Must be shy.
“Hi, Cheol!” she greets him warmly, taking his school bag. “I’m Jiyeong, your sister’s friend. I got you ice cre–”
Cheol bursts into tears.
Well, so much for first impressions.
She lets Cheol have both his and her ice cream on the drive to the apartment.
It’s relatively quiet in the car, save for Cheol’s quiet sobs and the sound of ice cream being eaten. Once he was buckled in and Jiyeong was pulling out of the parking lot, she had softly asked him what had happened, to which he had just told her to drive. Deciding to grant him his request, Jiyeong opts to simply get him to the apartment as soon as possible so that she can talk to him about whatever happened, and so Saebyeok can be there for him, too.
Sometimes Cheol’s sobs would grow louder, but when they do, he’s quick to silence them as best as he can. It breaks Jiyeong’s heart, and she wants to tell him that it’s okay to cry in front of her, but she doesn’t know if it’s her place to do so. She can’t help but recognize, albeit regretfully, a trait he and Saebyeok share – the need to mask their emotions in front of others. Sadly, she wonders if it’s a trait they had to learn while escaping the North and being discriminated against here in the South.
Wanting to do something, she rubs his shoulder to comfort him.
He lets her.
When Jiyeong shuts the engine off in their parking garage, Cheol doesn’t make any move to get out of the car. He’s finished his ice cream, and he’s simply sobbing quietly, staring down at his hands in his lap. Jiyeong wants to help him, she really does.
With that resolution in mind, she unbuckles her seatbelt, turning to face him.
“Hey, Cheol?”
He silently turns his head towards her with tear-stained cheeks, and Jiyeong sees the family resemblance as clear as day. He’s got Saebyeok’s eyes, ever so expressive despite what the rest of her face tells the world.
“I’ll meet you on your side of the car. Just stay there for now, yeah?”
Cheol nods meekly, wiping at his nose. Jiyeong smiles reassuringly, taking the keys and getting out of the car. She grabs Cheol’s bag from the backseat, staring at him. He’s still sniffling, twiddling his thumbs as he does.
Closing the door, Jiyeong makes a decision. Taking the bag in her hands, she wears it on her front, and walks to Cheol’s side of the car. Opening Cheol’s door, she crouches down at his side. Cheol just stares at her with those wide Kang eyes that she’s spent the better part of two months becoming endeared by.
“Listen,” Jiyeong begins softly, “I know you’re ten now, and I don’t want you to think I’m babying you, but do you think if I gave you a piggyback ride up, you’d feel a little better? I know it would’ve made me feel better as a kid.”
It would’ve.
It really would’ve.
Cheol sniffles, nodding as he unbuckles his seatbelt.
“Yes please,” he murmurs, stretching his arms out toward Jiyeong.
Jiyeong beams, turning around. “Coming right up, little man! Hop on!”
When she feels Cheol wrap his arms around her neck, she grabs a hold of the back of his legs and hoists the both of them up. She tries not to buckle at the weight when she’s fully standing upright. Cheol is only about five inches shorter than her, which is something to laugh at, really. And when her arms start to scream at her for taking on such a large weight given her lanky figure, she begins to wonder if she’s bitten off more than she can chew.
But then, Cheol starts to sniffle again. When he does, he buries his head into Jiyeong’s shoulder, tears soaking the flannel she wears, and Jiyeong knows she’ll do anything for this boy.
They get to the doorway of her and Saebyeok’s apartment, where she sets Cheol down gently. She takes his backpack into her hands, pauses to smile at him warmly, and digs through her pocket to pull out her house keys. When Jiyeong unlocks the door and lets them both in, she hears a commotion down their small hallway and the Mario Kart theme song playing on their TV, and she knows Saebyeok is home.
Jiyeong crouches down in front of him. “Here, I’ll get your shoes off for you,” she says, deftly untying his laces and taking his shoes off one by one.
“Cheol? That you?” Jiyeong hears from the hallway.
“Noona!” he cries, running towards the sound of Saebyeok’s voice once his shoes were fully off.
Saebyeok emerges from the hallway and is met with Cheol barreling towards her. Her eyes widen at his tear-stained cheeks, and she falls to her knees to catch him in her arms. They embrace one another tightly, and Jiyeong moves to crouch by them. Without letting go of her brother, Saebyeok turns to her.
“What happened?” she whispers, stroking the hair on Cheol’s head as he sobs.
Her eyes are glassy. Jiyeong doesn’t think she’s ever seen Saebyeok cry before.
“I don’t know, Saebyeok, he’s been crying since I picked him up,” Jiyeong explains helplessly.
“Cheol-a,” Saebyeok eases out of Cheol’s embrace. “Please tell me what happened,” she pleads, rubbing soothing circles into his shoulders.
“Dae-Hyun,” he whimpers, furiously wiping the tears streaming down his face.
Saebyeok gently moves his hands to the side and wipes his tears herself. “What about Dae-Hyun, hm?”
“H-he said,” Cheol starts, before sobbing once more, “he said that his dad told him that d-daddy was a cold-blooded c-commie and that’s why he died so I’m going t-to be fucked up because I d-don’t have a daddy,” he manages to stutter out, before collapsing back into Saebyeok’s arms with sobs that fill their living room.
For the first time ever, Jiyeong sees Saebyeok – put-together, resolute, determined, strong Kang Saebyeok who knows how to handle every situation thrown at her – freeze into a state of numbness. There’s a distant, faraway look in her eyes, and she’s so shocked that she can’t even bring herself to hug Cheol back. Jiyeong feels for her, she really does. It’s hard to force words out of your mouth or even move when the world is collapsing in on you all at once.
Jiyeong thinks back to earlier in the parking garage, when Cheol rested his head on her shoulder and she promised herself that from then on that she would do anything for him.
She figures now’s the time more than ever to do good on that promise.
“You know,” she clears her throat, catching the attention of both Kang siblings. Saebyeok looks at her pleadingly, never needing her more in her life. Some may argue that it’s everything Jiyeong’s ever wanted.
And yes, she wants Saebyeok to need her, but not like this.
Definitely not like this.
“I grew up without a daddy too,” Jiyeong shuts her eyes for a moment, inhaling a sharp breath. When she opens her eyes, she beams at them. “And I don’t know about you, but I think I turned out pretty great! And listen here, Cheol.”
Jiyeong sits down on the floor in front of him as he turns around to face her fully. She gently takes one of his hands in hers, rubbing soothing circles with the pad of her thumb. “My mommy wasn’t as smart as your sister here, or your mommy. She married a very bad man, you see?”
In an instant, Saebyeok sits down, gathering Cheol up in her lap and taking Jiyeong’s free hand into her own. She squeezes it tightly, and Jiyeong knows she understands. Well, understands the vague gist of it. Perhaps she’ll tell her the whole story someday, but today would not be that day. Today was about Cheol, the little boy whose hand is in hers and who doesn’t deserve a single hurtful word that comes his way.
Jiyeong chuckles humorlessly. “I really wish she didn’t, you know? I really wish she didn’t stay with my daddy. I wish she was brave, like your sister and your mommy! Do you know why?”
Cheol shakes his head, wiping his eyes with a damp sleeve. Jiyeong squeezes his hand.
“Because they would never let anything bad happen to you. And hey, you know what I think?” Jiyeong smiles wider. “I think that wherever your daddy is, he’s watching over you, too, and he’s not going to let anything bad happen to you, either.”
Given her whole sob-story of a life, Jiyeong is as atheist as they come. But so help her she will get down on her knees and pray if it means this little boy will have a father – a good one – to watch over him from above.
Cheol turns to Saebyeok now, as if to confirm that what Jiyeong is saying is true, and Saebyeok finds her voice once more.
“Never,” she agrees firmly, wiping her eyes and moving her arms to embrace him tightly. “Dae-Hyun is wrong. Nothing bad will happen to you, not if I can help it.”
“And you best believe you can count me in on that, eh little man?” Jiyeong nudges him. “I’ve got your back, too. No matter what.”
For the first time in what feels like forever, Cheol smiles through his tears. “I like it when noona calls me little man. Can you call me that more often, too?”
Jiyeong lets out a surprised laugh. “What Kang Cheol wants, Kang Cheol gets! You bet I will, little man. Anything for my favourite Kang sibling!”
Cheol giggles, looking back to his older sister. “Hear that, noona? Your friend likes me better than you,” he taunts her.
Jiyeong half expects Saebyeok to make a remark at that, but when she looks at her, all she’s doing is staring at Jiyeong in absolute adoration. It makes her cheeks go slightly red, and she hopes neither of them see.
Saebyeok simply rests her head on Cheol’s little shoulder, and smiles a small smile at Jiyeong. “Yeah, I guess I lost, huh?”
Jiyeong dies.
Right then and there, she dies.
Death by a pretty girl.
She finds it incredibly fitting.
Before she can melt into a puddle on the floor from Saebyeok staring at her for too long, Saebyeok turns her gaze to her brother.
“Go to the bathroom and wash your face, okay little man? You’ve got snot all over, it’s kind of gross,” she nudges him towards the hallway playfully.
Cheol complies easily, nodding furiously before running to the bathroom. The second she hears the door close and the faucet running, Saebyeok wipes the smile off of her face, instantly replacing it with a murderous glare.
“I’m going to castrate that boy’s pathetic excuse for a father if I ever have the displeasure of meeting him,” she growls.
Jiyeong stands up, offering a hand to Saebyeok, which she takes. She hoists her up, and the minute Saebyeok is on her feet, Jiyeong takes a leap of faith and gives Saebyeok a hug. She knows Saebyeok is a little touchy when it comes to… well, touch, but it doesn’t seem like Saebyeok minds the invasion of space. In fact, as Jiyeong buries her head in her chest, Saebyeok rests her head on top of Jiyeong’s, closing her eyes and holding her close.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that.” Jiyeong murmurs into Saebyeok’s chest. She lifts her head up, looking Saebyeok in the eye. “That must’ve been hard for you, too. Are you okay?”
“I will be,” Saebyeok releases a breath she’d been holding. “Do you want to talk about what you told Cheol?” she asks quietly, her grip on Jiyeong tightening the slightest bit.
Jiyeong grins at her, shaking her head. “Thank you, but not now. Let’s spend the rest of today making the little man feel like the king of the world, yeah? It’s what he deserves.”
They’re silent for a moment, just taking one another in.
Saebyeok then bows her head down in defeat. “I choked back there.”
“Hey,” Jiyeong chides softly, reaching up to brush Saebyeok’s bangs away from her face. “You’re allowed to choke, you know. Especially with something like that.”
Saebyeok sighs, giving Jiyeong an incomprehensible look. It feels like she’s trying to figure Jiyeong out, and Jiyeong slightly shrinks underneath her scrutiny. Had she gone too far when comforting Cheol the way she did?
“And you’ll be here? Whenever I choke?” she murmurs, and there’s a vulnerability in her eyes that makes Jiyeong soften.
“I’ll always be here. For both of you.”