Work Text:
Gwyn shifted on the sofa, pulling the soft blanket tighter around her legs as she turned the page. The dim glow of the lamp beside her offered just enough light to read her novel, even if the world outside was pitch black. She glanced over at the clock in the opposite wall of the private library, and realised that she’d been up there for nearly two hours now.
The House of Wind was quiet at this hour. Cassian and Nesta had left for their room a couple of hours prior, after they had parted ways in the dining room. Gwyn didn’t think they were sleeping, given the charged look Cassian had given Nesta before she waved them goodnight, but at least the House had sheltered that little nook from all unwelcoming noises.
Gwyn couldn’t help but giggle at herself. A year ago, she would’ve felt scandalised to have such inappropriate thoughts about her friends—how dare she even suggest Cassian and Nesta could be indulging in such lewd activities? But now, it felt good to know there was nothing to be embarrassed about. Emerie and Nesta had taught her just that.
Her attention drifted away from the book once more, and she wondered where the Shadowsinger could be. He hadn’t been at dinner, and she hadn’t heard him come home later. Perhaps he wasn’t going to sleep in the House that night either, which shouldn’t have made her feel disappointed—but it did. She shook her head. It probably had to do with the fact that she hadn’t seen him in three days.
There was no point in denying it—Gwyn missed him. She missed her friend, his steady company, their secret jokes nobody else understood or laughed at, the challenge in his voice every time they trained. His presence always grounded her, a silent reminder that she was safe. Because even if Gwyn could defend herself just fine, there was something about being next to the Shadowsinger that made her feel stronger. He was her safety net if all else failed.
So yes, she missed him. A lot. It had everything to do with that, and little to do with the nervous drumming of her heart every time she thought about him. Obviously.
As if her thoughts had summoned him, Gwyn’s eyes suddenly shot towards a dark mist that was sneaking into the private library under the door. The mist seemed to be alive, reaching for her ankles to wrap around them as in greeting. Gwyn smiled down at the playful shadows, and immediately knew who was about to knock on the door.
She tried to contain her excitement, but failed.
A moment later, a soft knock on the wooden door made her heart jump.
“Come in,” she called softly. Putting the book down, Gwyn quickly smoothed the wrinkles on her nightgown as if it mattered. For some weird reason and after not seeing him for three days, it did.
Azriel opened the door quietly, barely disturbing the soothing silence of the night, and then closed it behind him. When their eyes collided across the room, Gwyn swore his hard features softened. The corners of his lips twitched in an attempt to match her bright smile.
“I hope I’m not disturbing you,” he said quietly, taking a few hesitant steps towards her.
Gwyn noticed his clothing—all seven syphons and Illyrian leathers. He smelled of cold air, too, and a few strands of his dark hair were sticking up. His massive wings were folded behind his back, a cocoon of comforting silence pulsating around him.
“Not at all,” she patted the empty spot beside her on the sofa, and he got closer. When he reached her though, he didn’t sit down. Gwyn ignored her disappointment. “Where have you been, Shadowsinger?”
She didn’t want to sound too worried, but he had left for three days without an explanation or a goodbye. Not like he owed her either, but.
“Scouting mission on the Autumn Court,” an internal battle against himself seemed to be taking place behind the depth of his eyes. Then, he added, “I should’ve said goodbye before I left. I’m sorry.”
Gwyn’s chest tightened, “It’s...it’s alright,” she assured him.
“I had to leave immediately,” he didn’t seem to think it was alright. Gwyn had never heard him explain himself like this. But she listened. “You were working down in the library when I left. I didn’t want to disturb you or the other priestesses.”
“I understand, really,” she gave him a small smile and resisted the urge to pull him down and make him sit next to her. She needed to feel his warmth, for whatever reason. “How did the scouting go?”
“Productive, at least,” he ran a hand through his hair. Even by his usual standards, he looked tired. Gwyn guessed he hadn’t slept at all during those three days. “I just came back from reporting to Rhys.”
“At three in the morning?”, she arched a playful eyebrow.
Azriel’s smile was just as humorous. “He doesn’t get that much sleep these days anyway.”
Gwyn laughed, “Let me guess. Nyx?”
He nodded, “He gets a bit too energetic at night, apparently,” Azriel’s features visibly relaxed at the mention of his nephew. Gwyn tried to ignore the fast beating of her heart it caused.
“You bat boys and your inability to sleep at night,” Gwyn teased. “Is Cassian actually the only one capable of falling asleep at all?”
Azriel threw her a wicked look, “Bold of you to assume Cassian is sleeping right now.”
Gwyn rolled her eyes at the implication, but couldn’t help her cheeks from boiling hot. She hoped her face wasn’t as bright red as she suspected, but Azriel’s chuckle told her all she needed to know.
She glared at him, but the amusement didn’t leave his face. Instead, a playful shadow drifted towards her and danced through her hair, as if ruffling it. There was no doubt in her mind that Azriel had commanded that one.
“What about you?”, she challenged. “Aren’t you supposed to be in bed, Shadowsinger? You look like you haven’t slept since you left.”
“That’s because I haven’t,” he smiled, but it quickly vanished when he saw the concerned look on her face. “I’m fine. I’ve gone longer without sleeping.”
“Still. You look...exhausted.”
“I could say the same about you, Berdara.”
She narrowed her eyes, “Don’t change topics.”
Azriel pointedly ignored her, “Why aren’t you asleep?”
Gwyn looked at the novel next to her, “I wanted to read for a bit. See if I got sleepy or tired.”
“And?”, he arched a skeptical eyebrow.
“No luck so far.”
She saw the slightest faint of concern in his face before it vanished. Ever the trained Spymaster with a face of stone. Azriel glanced at her book, then his attention drifted towards the nearby shelf, and he grabbed a random novel.
“What are you doing?”, Gwyn watched as he inspected the title, skimmed through the pages and decided that he liked it well enough.
Before she could register what was going on, Azriel sat down on the empty spot next to her, “I’m reading with you. If you’ll have me.”
She swallowed nervously. Why were her palms getting sweaty all of a sudden?
“You want to read with me?”, Gwyn asked.
The surprise in her voice, how small and unsure she sounded in that moment, shattered his soul. Azriel didn't give himself enough time to think why he was reacting this way to her.
“I do,” he weighed the book in his hands. “Is it alright? I can leave if you want.”
“No, no,” alarm flashed in her eyes. “It’s… it’s nice to have company. But I think we’ll be here a while. Why don’t you go change into something less… Spymastery?”
Azriel chuckled, “Spymastery,” he repeated.
Gwyn’s cheeks flushed, “Shut up. You know what I mean.”
“Alright,” his smile was wide as he stood up from the couch, leaving the book behind. From this angle, he looked massive compared to her. “I’ll be back in five.”
Gwyn used the time he was gone to recompose herself. Why was she reacting this way? Why was her heart beating so fast and her palms so sweaty? She told herself she was acting silly simply because she had missed him these past few days. She’d be fine the next day. Or that’s what she hoped for.
Azriel was back in less than five minutes. When he entered the library again, he was wearing dark grey sweatpants and a black t-shirt, a lounge type of outfit she’d never seen him wear before. He looked…
Mother above.
Gwyn lowered her gaze to the closed book in her lap. Why the heck was she reacting this way? It was just an outfit he looked ridiculously handsome in. Jeez.
When she felt his weight next to her on the couch, her stomach jumped. She masked it with a smile, “What book is that?”
Azriel picked it up and Gwyn immediately noticed that the thick tome looked stupidly small in his large hands. Something was seriously wrong with her.
“I think it’s a mystery novel,” he said as he opened it in the first chapter. “What are you reading?”
“A romance.”
“Ah,” she could hear the smirk on his voice. “Is that code for smut?”
Gwyn smacked his arm and was momentarily surprised by how hard his muscles were, even when his arms were relaxed. She ignored it for her own good, “Stop it.”
“You didn’t answer my question, so I’m guessing that’s a yes,” he teased.
“You’re the worst,” she glared.
“Shh… Quiet, Berdara. I’m reading.”
Gwyn rolled her eyes, “Unbelievable.”
Azriel chuckled and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close for a side hug. Gwyn’s heart stopped beating for a second, but she didn’t flinch. It wasn’t the first time they hugged, and it still surprised her that the Shadowsinger could be so affectionate. She’d never seen him hug anyone else, not even his brothers.
Gwyn wrapped an arm around his middle and squeezed him tight. Before she could even think it through, she blurted out, “I’ve missed you.”
His shadows deepened around them, as if they too wanted a hug.
“I’ve missed you, too,” Azriel whispered softly. He had missed her terribly badly, more than he wanted to admit. More than it was probably healthy to miss a friend.
“Take me with you on your next mission?”, Gwyn’s hopeful eyes found him and his heart swooned.
“I’ll see what I can do,” he squeezed her closer. “But I won’t take you if it’s too dangerous.”
“Okay,” she didn’t feel like arguing. She’d stand her ground when the time came, and he’d give in to her pleading eyes just like he always did. But for now, she only wanted to dwell in the warmth of his embrace.
With one arm carefully around her shoulders and her head on his chest, Azriel went back to his book and started reading. Gwyn forgot hers on the other side of the couch, and instead focused on his relaxed breathing and the steady beat of his heart. Before she knew it, her eyelids grew heavy and her whole body shut down.
For the first time in months, she fell asleep without a sleeping tonic to aid her. It seemed like the safety of Azriel’s arms was all she needed, after all.
“Gwyn isn’t in her room.”
“Have you checked with Clotho?”
“Yes. She said she never came back to the library last night.”
Nesta paced around the dining room as Cassian finished his breakfast. Her heart was beating so damn fast she thought she was going to pass out. Where the hell was her friend?
“You look awfully relaxed,” she narrowed her eyes at her mate, her accusing tone cutting through the air between them like a blade. “Our friend is missing. I don’t know if you’ve noticed.”
Cassian finished his orange juice in one big gulp before speaking, “She’s not missing.”
“She’s not in her room and she didn’t go back to her quarters in the library,” Nesta threw her arms up in exasperation. “What do you call that, Cassian?”
“I call that overreacting,” just as he finished his last bite, the House vanished the dirty dishes. The General stood up and wrapped his arms around his mate from behind. “Have you checked the rest of the House?”
“I went to the training ring,” she said. Cassian kissed the top of her hair in an attempt to soothe her. “She wasn’t there, either.”
“I felt Azriel come in last night.”
Nesta frowned, “What does that have to do with anything?”
Cassian didn’t answer. Slowly, Nesta realised what he meant.
“You’re not implying that they are…?”
“Sleeping together?”, he finished for her. Cassian shrugged, “Maybe not in the way you and I sleep together, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they had spent the night together.”
“ What ?”, Nesta turned around to face him. “Do you think they’re in Azriel’s room?”
“They aren’t. I checked.”
“So, where…?”, intuition suddenly sparked in Nesta’s chest. She grabbed her mate’s hand. “Come.”
She didn’t know how she knew, but she just knew . They hurried up the stairs into the second floor. Nesta rushed them through the long corridor until they reached one of the doors at the end, a private library she knew Gwyn liked to spend alone time in. Or with the Shadowsinger, if Cassian was correct.
Nesta hesitated, but she finally knocked on the door and waited. Nothing.
“Maybe they aren’t in here,” Cassian whispered.
Nesta shook her head. She knocked again, but when nobody answered, she impatiently opened the door just a crack, and peered inside. She held her breath.
“Is she in there?”, she heard Cassian ask from behind.
Nesta smirked and opened the door all the way, “See for yourself.”
Cassian frowned, but his expression softened when he saw what Nesta was talking about. A big grin appeared all over his face.
Gwyn and Azriel were sleeping on the small couch at the back of the room. Azriel was sitting down, his legs spread out with an open book on his lap and an arm draped over Gwyn’s shoulders. Gwyn’s legs were covered by a small blanket, her head resting against his chest, snoring softly.
It was a sight Cassian wished to capture forever. Mostly to tease his brother later, but also because something was telling him that this was it. That Gwyn was it for Azriel, whatever ‘it’ meant.
“I don’t want to wake them up,” Nesta whispered. He noticed her expression was as tender as his, “They look so peaceful.”
“I can’t remember the last time Azriel took a nap, let alone had a full night’s sleep,” Cassian commented. “Come on.”
He placed a hand on the small on her back as he ushered Nesta out of the room, then closed the door behind them. Once back in the dining room, Nesta shook her head in amusement and chuckled.
“He likes her, doesn’t he?”
Cassian smirked, “I’m still waiting for a confession,” he said. “But it’s painfully obvious that he does.”
Something loosened up inside Nesta’s chest at the thought of Gwyn and Azriel together. An unexplainable feeling of calmness and joy that had come at last, as if she’d been waiting for it.
“Good. That’s good,” she said, allowing the peaceful feeling to settle in. “There’s nobody else I’d trust to keep Gwyn’s heart safe.”