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A laugh flooded into Punz’s headphones at an all too-loud volume for how late it was on a Saturday night. If he’d take the time to admit it to himself - and his friends - he was absolutely tipsy, but he didn’t want to leave the call, not just yet. The apartment he had just gotten was new, almost overwhelmingly so. It wasn’t barren, or even close to it, but the comforting buzz in a discord call and the almost-tuned-out sound of his friends giggling and yelling was enough to keep him from feeling lonely in the empty space. Punz was barely paying attention now, their mind wandering elsewhere in the contentedness of being tipsy but not drunk and the background noise of Boomer teasing Foolish about whatever was going on.
They stared at their screen for a moment, just letting the discord call bubbles light up and fade like it was a T.V. show until their eyes began to hurt. In the back of his mind, he found a deep comfort in the green outlines, almost-static screen and the steadily fading noise of their friends. Mindlessly, Punz closed their eyes, shoving his head into his arms like he was burying himself for a bear-like hibernation. It was only now processing that he might have been a bit more tipsy than he’d thought he’d been.
The voices of his friends had calmed an unnatural amount for Pummel Party Saturday now. He took it upon himself to glance up at the clock, reading that it was 1:32a.m. before making a soft hissing noise and re-hiding his face. There was a soft shuffling noise in the call, but no speaking, and this made slightly-tipsy-maybe-drunk Punz curious.
Humming, they said, “Hellooooooooo.”
There was a loud shuffle again on the call, and a sharp sucking in of air like he’d jumpscared the person on the call. Before he could speak again, a soft, “Hey? Yo? You still up, Punzo?”
Boomer.
Punz scoffed, shoving the warmth his soft off-stream voice gave him down, “Yeah. Clearly. I just talked to you… dumbass.”
“Hey, man, you can cut that. We ended stream.”
“We never cut it usually, you’re so meeaaan to me, Boomer.”
There was a quick silence between them, as if Punz had said a bad word, though it remained comfortable nonetheless. Punz hated that. They hated how Boomer could make him feel like he was safe, even if they were sitting in silence on a call that no longer had meaning.
“Punz?”
“Whaaat?”
“Are you drunk?”
Another scoff came from the blonde, with a soft murmur of, “We always drink on PP Saturday, Boomer.”
A hum followed from Boomer - more of a soft groan than a hum - with a soft, “Yeah,” close behind it, “We do. I think most everyone did tonight, big dog.”
“You didn’t?”
“Nah. Not tonight.”
Punz whined a bit. They were sobering up enough to know that it was stupid to whine at Boomer over a discord call, but the soft and doting attention he was getting made him want to play up the drunkness until he physically couldn’t. Hearing a chuckle on the other end of the phone was like a reward for being stupid and drunk, but Punz didn’t care right now, he was getting soft Boomer time.
“What, man? Gonna complain that I’m not all stupid sleepy drunk like you?”
Oh, that struck a chord. It wasn’t a good one, either, it was gut wrenching. They sat up, staring at Boomer’s icon as it lit up green with a shuffle. Maybe Boomer was laying down.
“Do you think I’m stupid, froggy?”
“What?”
Oh. Fuck, “Oh, come on, man, don’t have to answer, it was just a joke.”
Punz’s gut was twisting in five hundred directions at once, and they hated it. Nothing about what had just happened was correct. He was too punctual to have sounded drunk-drunk just then, and he knew he couldn’t cover his ass that much unless Boomer did it for him.
“Nah, nah. Do you want an answer?”
“What?”
Boomer laughed, too soft for Punz’s liking, and repeated himself, “Bro, I asked if you want an answer or not. Punz thought about it, listening to Boomer hum along to whatever song was playing in their head before responding with a softness to match Boomer’s, “I mean, yeah, sure. Go for it.”
“Hmm… Yeah, alright, let me think on it for a minute.”
“Duuuude, it’s a simple question, like, yes or no. Do you think I’m stupid?”
“I think it’s more complicated than that, dude.”
“It isn’t.”
Punz was suddenly worried that they had sounded mean when he said that, but let that worry fade away a little bit when Boomer laughed over the call. In the back of his mind, Punz was damning the calm that man could instill in him. He was sitting up now, staring at Boomer’s icon and tapping on his desk impatiently. Sobering was a bitch when your best friend was sitting in a discord call trying to decide if you’re dumb or not, he decided.
“You’re not stupid, Punzo.”
“Thank you, was that so-,” they were cut off.
“My man, you’re the opposite of stupid. You’re so fucking good at speedruns and shit, and you know exactly how to make me and PP Saturday comfortable, and dude, you do your fucking best. You were what like, one of the best in the country at Fortnite? I mean, you just fucking, know how to do shit. You’re great. You know how to fucking style yourself too! I know I call you like, a fucking axe body spray can and shit but you’re pretty and you know what to do and…,” they fell quiet, “I mean, you aren’t dumb.”
Punz was a bit in shock. They weren’t expecting that much of an answer. If he had been asked that question, he would’ve responded with something along the lines of, ‘What, dude, no, what the fuck’, and tried to make it lighthearted at least. Boomer wasn’t fucking around tonight. If Boomer was fucking around, Punz didn’t want to know.
“You really think that, dude?”
“What, you think I’m gonna lie at like 2a.m.? My brain is fucking fried, bro.”
“You didn’t even drink, Boomer.”
“Yeah, well I haven’t done those fucking, late night streams recently. Fixing my shit with all the meet ups and whatever the fuck, y’know?”
“Yeah…,” Punz yawned, “When do we get to do that?”
They fell into another silence - more of a sleepy one now than one giving them space to think - before Boomer spoke again, “What if I showed up at your place tomorrow?”
“What…?”
“I mean, what’s one long drive?”
“Dude, I’m in Florida.”
“So?”
Punz laughed now, in an almost cruel way, “There’s no god damn way you’re driving down to Florida on impulse.”
“You saying I should come now, big dog?”
“No, dude, I’m drunk, you’ll knock on my door and I’ll be fucking asleep or some shit.”
“I can wait outside.”
Punz scoffed and fell silent, unsure if Boomer was joking or not and too tired now to ask. Boomer grunted and started moving around, a lot. There were so many shuffles that Punz was almost sure that they’d get a headache before the hangover hit.
“Bro, what are you doing?”
“Fucking… Packing, man.”
“Ohhh?,” the usual fake-flirting hum came through, “Got more than an ass in those pants?”
“Nah! Nah, man, I’m packing for a fucking spontaneous drive to my best friend’s house.”
“You’re coming?”
“I mean, I was serious.”
“Oh my god, it’s,” he glanced at the clock, “2:05, man.”
“Yeah, what? I’ll get there at like… in the afternoon?”
“Dude, no.”
“Dude, yes! I’m coming.”
“No?”
“You’re questioning yourself!”
Punz groaned and whined out, “Froggy, I need sleeeep.”
“You can sleep, it’ll be like 15 fucking hours, man.”
Punz thought about it, shuffling around. They disconnected from the call, unplugging their headphones and immediately rejoining on his phone, putting Boomer on speaker, “Join a private call with me please, dude?”
“What? Yeah, sure.”
The disconnect noise almost broke Punz’s heart, like Boomer wasn’t coming right back. The noise of a Discord call made it all much better. Crash landing in his bed before answering made it perfect.
“‘Sup, homie.”
“I’m sending you my address.”
“Bro! Fuck yeah, bro. Thanks.”
More shuffling on Boomer’s end followed, almost like they sped up packing. Punz almost giggled, “Simp.”
“Hell yeah, bro,” they paused, “You should sleep.”
“Whyyyy?”
“You gotta be awake when I get there.”
“You promise you’re coming?”
“Yeah, puppy, I’ll be there. You bet your ass I’ll be there. I can fucking, stay on call too maybe. Just fucking let you listen to me going and shit.”
“I won’t be able to sleep that way. You’re fucking loud, Boomer.”
“Then hang up, bro. I’ll see you soon.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
“Okay… Love you, froggy prince.”
“Love you too, big dog.”
The call disconnected, and Punz immediately felt themselves falling asleep. He figured it was best to fall asleep riding on the high of hearing how much Boomer was smiling when he’d said that he loved Punz. He figured he could bear a hangover with a frog by his side. He figured he might kiss this frog too, even if he didn’t have to. Boomer was a prince, and they would save Punz. Punz would sleep now. He would see Boomer soon.
