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“So how does it feel being 24 years old?” Jimin asks, their legs entangled like pretzels. He tweets four of their selcas before throwing his phone to the edge of the bed, focusing now only on the love of his life: Jeon Jungkook.
Jungkook thinks hard about his answer. He caresses Jimin’s hair with one hand, pulling him closer by the waist with the other. Sticky, as always. “It doesn’t feel any different from being 23. But it’s closer to 25, so I guess I’m a bit anxious.”
“Excuse me, what’s so bad about being 25?” retorts the 25-year-old nearly-26-year-old.
“I don’t know. I feel like I haven’t done enough yet, you know?”
Jimin jerks away from their embrace with a theatricality that makes Jungkook snort from laughter. “Are you kidding me, Jeon Jungkook? Are you?”
“Come here,” Jungkook tries pulling Jimin back into a hug but Jimin uses all his core strength and innate stubbornness to resist the drag, glaring at Jungkook, his face all flushed. Jungkook feels a deep fondness rise in his chest.
“You did not write award-winning songs, sell out concerts in big stadiums, and win multiple daesangs just to say you haven’t done enough.”
“Those are things I achieved with you guys. I wouldn’t have gotten any of those without the six of you.”
“You’re getting this all wrong, Jungkook,” Jimin sits up, brushes his hair back, and wags a finger the way he always does when he’s about to win an argument. Jungkook bites his lip, scrunches his nose, trying hard not to laugh. “You are part of us. We wouldn’t have gotten those without you.”
“I know that. I just wonder if I’m missing out on anything else, you know? I sometimes think about what a 24-year-old would be doing right now if they weren’t out there performing like we are, creating music like we do. Am I where I’m supposed to be? Am I living life too fast or too slow? Am I doing things right?”
“First of all, never compare yourself to anyone or you’ll always think you’re missing out on something,” Jimin says in a serious tone. Jungkook wants to kiss him so bad.
“Second, you should be grateful. You have all these amazing opportunities to do what you love doing while making others happy in the process. There was a third but I completely forgot just now. Oh, right. Third, you have so much years ahead of you to do the things you want. Time is a construct. You create your own timeline so don’t let anyone else dictate it for you.”
“You always know the right things to say,” Jungkook smiles and pinches Jimin’s nose. “Oh, my precious little Park Jimin, what would I do without you?”
“God, you’re so annoying,” Jimin flicks Jungkook's hand away and moves to get off the bed.
“Hey, hey, hey, it’s my birthday,” Jungkook yanks Jimin back into his arms and gives him a peck on the cheek. “You can't fight with me today, you cutie.”
“Don’t cutie me,” Jimin pouts. “I meant every word I said. And, technically, it isn't your birthday yet.”
“I know you did. And in all seriousness, thank you, hyung. I just needed five seconds to be a kid.” Jungkook dips his lips into the ocean of Jimin’s blond hair. “Growing up really does scare me a bit, but I know I’ll be okay. You’re always two steps ahead anyway, so you can make the mistakes for us both.”
Jimin responds with a grunt while moving closer, his face resting on the crook of Jungkook’s neck.
Earlier that night, they ordered in pizza and played video games, just as Jungkook requested for the eve of his birthday. Although Jimin wanted something grander for Jungkook, like a movie date or going ice skating, that would have meant bringing along their manager. Jungkook didn’t want anyone else around that night. He just wanted Jimin.
Plus, they had practice scheduled for the next day, so it’s not like they had time for a private celebration. What Jungkook was really looking forward to was heading out to Busan with Jimin on October to see both their families. But for now, their hometown will have to wait.
“Baby, are you asleep?”
“Mmm,” Jimin groans on Jungkook’s neck. The sound vibrates on Jungkook’s skin, tickling him.
“I love you.”
“I love you your ass.”
Jungkook laughs. “No, really. I love you.”
“Whatever,” Jimin says before mumbling back without lifting his head. “I love you, too.”
Jungkook wanted to tell Jimin all sorts of things, like how grateful he was that Jimin saved him countless of times to be where he is at 24, or how he was never excited about growing old until he pictured himself walking along the shores of Dadaepo beach with an older but just as beautiful Jimin. How in awe he still is of how the universe conspired them to meet, of how he slowly started to see his hyung as more than just a friend, of how he fell completely head-first in-love with him. Instead, he rubs his thumb over Jimin’s rib until the latter falls asleep, and even a little while after then.
Jungkook glances at the clock: half past twelve. They’re usually still up at this time, tinkering with their phones or piecing together a puzzle they bought from an online toy shop. In fact, he felt like making himself a sandwich. But nothing was better than having his boyfriend like this in his arms, serene and beautiful. Jungkook finds himself drifting off soon after, lulled by the low thrum of their humidifier and the rise and fall of Jimin’s chest against his.
***************
A loud ring echoes in the room. Jimin wakes up and scrambles in the dark for his phone, patting the sheets until his finger finally lands on the volume button. The call continues but the phone goes silent. Worried he might have woken Jungkook up, he looks over at him and Jungkook just moans, turning his back towards Jimin, still asleep.
Jimin gently crawls out of the bed and heads to their living room, careful not to make any noise. When he looks at the caller, it reads soulmate.
“Taehyungie,” Jimin rubs his eyes. “Why are you calling me at four in the morning?”
“So you haven’t heard, huh?”
“Heard what?”
“Check our groupchat.”
With Taehyung still on the call, Jimin sleepily taps on his phone. He places Taehyung on loud speaker before clicking on the Messages app. 35 unread messages from Bangtan groupchat.
2:45AM
namjoon: *attaches photo* GUYS!!! #1 ON BILLBOARD HOT 100!!!!!
namjoon: HOLY FUCK
namjoon: oh shit sorry false alarm it’s an edit, go back to sleep guys
namjoon: damn it, i hate photoshop
3:32AM
namjoon: *attaches photo*
namjoon: okay for real this time
namjoon: we made it guys
namjoon: #1 on billboard hot 100 holy shit it’s for real
namjoon: i can’t believe this
3:48AM
namjoon: is everyone asleep
namjoon: do you all have this groupchat on mute
namjoon: i’m offended
Jin: Yo yo yo, my fellow #1 Billboard Hot 100 artists!
namjoon: hyuuuuuung, i didn’t think they’d announce it this early
taehyung: OHHHHH MYYYY GGGGOOODDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!
namjoon: ah, there he is
taehyung: i’m freaking outttttutututtut
taehyung: oh my god oh my god oh my godhfjdhfkjshdfhsdkfjhsj
taehyung: hrrhf948rh83rh9283bjfjskn
3:49AM
Jin: He’s malfunctioning, Namjoon.
taehyung: ahjussi is still awake lolololol
Jin: Yeah, because you two wouldn’t shut up.
j-h0pe: best birthday gift for our kookie!!! <3 <3 <3
Jin: Happy birthday, Jungkook-ah! Fighting!
namjoon: oh right! happy birthday banana milk maknae!!!
taehyung: KOOK-AH HABBI BURDAYYYY1!11!!1111!!!!!
j-h0pe: sorry brothers, eyes are closing
j-h0pe: goodnight and love love love to you all! <3 <3 <3 kekekekeke
3:50
namjoon: guys let’s all get some sleep, we have practice in a few hours
namjoon: the rest aren’t awake anyway
namjoon: let’s just celebrate tomorrow
Jin: Night, losers. My talented losers. Mwah.
namjoon: love you guys
namjoon: thank you for everything
namjoon: you’re truly my light
“You still there?”
Jimin didn’t realize he’s been silent for a few minutes. Tears start running down his face. He can’t believe it. Number one on Billboard Hot 100. Another dream achieved. But so soon, so soon.
“Yeah. I’m still here.”
“You're crying.” Taehyung didn't even need to ask.
“Yeah,” Jimin sniffles. “I just… I actually can’t think of anything to say. I—“ His voice cracks.
“Shhh, it's okay. Do you want me to drive over to you?”
Jimin wants to rebut Taehyung’s offer but what comes out his lips is a soft whimper.
“Please don’t cry, Jimin, or I’ll cry too.”
But Jimin couldn’t help it. He sinks into the sofa and starts weeping, biting onto the sleeve of his sweater so he wouldn’t be too loud. Taehyung croons his name, “Oh Jimin, my dear Jimin, please don’t cry,” all while beginning to sob himself.
They both reminisce the days they performed in darkened stadiums, struggled with unhealthy eating habits, practiced for hours in dingy studios, and all of that led to this, them finally being heard all over the world. And liked. Appreciated. Valued. Like all the other artists and performers they admired.
“Does Jungkook know?”
“No, not yet. He’s fast asleep. I don’t want to wake him.”
“What a wonderful birthday gift. I’m jealous.”
“I know. He’s going to be so thrilled,” Jimin looks over at the sleeping silhouette of Jungkook in their bedroom. His heart does a little somersault. “I better call Namjoon-hyung. Thank you for calling me, Taehyungie. I love you.”
After they end the call, Jimin dials the number of their leader. It rings three times before Jimin hears a muffled sound at the other side of the line. Jimin doesn’t even wait for Namjoon to speak before he goes on a harried stream of consciousness monologue:
“Namjoon-hyung, I’m so proud of you, we never would have gotten this without you, you’re a wonderful leader who deserves all the number ones and daesangs in the world, you fought for us, protected us, even went through sleepless nights for us just to give us music the entire universe knows and loves so much, you are brilliant, amazing, intelligent, creative, handsome, truly the most handsome, and there’s just no one like you, hyung, no one, no one, no one.”
Silence. He thought his hyung would have said something by now. Then Jimin realizes Namjoon is probably wearing his training mouth tape for his snores.
“Oh God, hyung, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry, please go back to sleep, I love you, I’ll see you later.”
Namjoon makes a sound that Jimin understands as an “I love you, too,” before he ends the call.
On the sofa, Jimin stares at the ceiling. It feels like he’s in a fever dream he never wants to wake up from. Number one on the Billboard Hot 100. It's not quite sinking in just yet. How many times have they envisioned seeing their name at the peak of that list? How many times have they listened to Billboard playlists, wishing one of their songs could take that top spot at least once in their lifetime?
Then Jimin remembers he hasn’t spoken to the one person he should have called first.
“Hyung,” Jimin whispers into the phone. “I’m sorry to wake you.”
“This better be important,” Yoongi’s raspy voice replies.
“Your dream. It’s here, it’s real. It came true, after all these years,” Jimin sobs again. He couldn’t stop thinking about the days him and Yoongi would sit together at their old studio, surrounded by anime figures on the shelves and Carhartt skateboard decks on the walls. They’d film video logs, sample music, and even play the best hiphop tracks from the Billboard charts.
“Wouldn’t it be cool if we were number one too, someday?” Jimin used to ask him.
Yoongi scoffed. Back then, it seemed like a joke to dream that big.
But here they were.
The best thing about talking to his Yoongi-hyung is that only a few words need to be said. Yoongi knew exactly what Jimin was talking about.
“This soon?”
“That’s exactly what I thought. I didn’t think we’d get a number one so quickly. But I guess it’s because it’s our only English song, and it’ll probably be the last one for a while—"
“Hey, don’t beat the horse before it starts galloping.”
Jimin pauses. “Is that a real idiom?”
“It is now.”
Jimin giggles. “This is just so surreal, isn’t it? Do you remember the times, hyung, when we couldn’t even look each other in the eye during my first week at the dorm? Or the time when I made you and Jungkook my dad’s special sandwich? Or when we barely filled up that small concert arena in L.A.?”
Yoongi doesn’t answer.
For a second, Jimin thinks the line got cut. “Hyung?”
“Damn it. I hate you. God. Sorry. I thought I wasn’t going to cry but I am. I’ve failed my ancestors.”
Jimin laughs. “I thought you’d know by now that crying doesn’t equate to weakness.”
“Not on my book.”
Something shuffles from behind him. Jimin jumps, startled to see Jungkook standing by the doorway of their bedroom, stretching, his belly peeking underneath his black shirt.
“Hyung, Jungkook’s awake. It’s his turn to cry.”
“Tell him he’s a lucky bastard.”
“I’ll change the last word to ‘kid’ for his sake. I love you, hyung.”
“I love you, Jimin-ah,” Yoongi replies. Click.
"Was that Yoongi-hyung?"
"Yes baby," Jimin kneels on the couch and beams at Jungkook. "I had to tell him the good news."
"Huh? What good news? Are we expecting?"
Jimin punched him cutely on the stomach. He didn’t have the emotional energy to repeat the news without crying so he leaves it to Jungkook to check his phone. He takes up the space beside Jimin on the couch, his arms resting on Jimin's legs. Jungkook’s eyebrows are furrowed as he scrolls up the group chat then, a few blinks later, his eyes widen.
“Happy birthday, baby,” Jimin smiles.
Jungkook looks up at Jimin with stars in his irises. “This can’t be real.”
“It is. You’re our chart fairy.”
“Oh baby,” Jungkook lunges at Jimin for a hug. Jimin uses his free hand to open his phone and they both stare at the screenshot of the chart together. Then Jungkook buries his face in Jimin’s sweater and it’s Jimin who caresses him now. He loves that about them. When one is sinking, the other becomes the anchor so they can both stay afloat. They stay like that together for a while, the both of them quietly sobbing, but safe in each other’s arms.
“Would you still be able say you haven’t achieved enough at 24?”
Jungkook pauses to think. “Can I say something that might sound utterly ungrateful?”
“If that’s your imposter syndrome kicking in, I won’t kiss you for a day.”
“First of all, you not kissing me for a day is a nightmare so no, that’s not it,” Jungkook pulls back and stretches his legs on the sofa, pulling Jimin’s thighs over his. “But the charts? They mean nothing to me.”
To Jungkook’s surprise, Jimin stays silent and waits for him to continue.
“I’m grateful and I’m proud and I’m honored. Believe me. This is beyond what I imagined we’d ever achieve at this stage in our lives. But at the end of the day, it’s just a chart. What matters most to me are the members and the people who love us for who we are. You.”
“Yeah, I guess I know what you mean.”
Jungkook raises his eyebrows. “You do?”
“You’re right about it being just a chart. I realized just now that what made me cry so much is knowing I got to experience all of this with you guys. You, especially. I got to top the charts with the love of my life. Can you believe that?”
Jungkook smiles and pulls Jimin’s arms around his neck so their faces are centimeters apart. “I surely can. The love of your life happens to think you’re the most genuine, talented, mesmerizing artist there is out there.”
Jimin blushes. “Idiot.”
“You’re absolutely the best gift, Park Jimin. The chart is just an extravagant bonus. But doing all this with you is a gift I don’t deserve every single day.”
“It’s your birthday,” Jimin wipes his tears with his sleeve. “I’m the one who’s supposed to be saying the sweet things.”
“Saying sweet things to the Park Jimin is a privilege,” Jungkook kisses Jimin softly on the lips. It’s been six years since they first kissed but Jungkook’s entire body still melts as their lips touch.
"Wait a minute," Jimin pulls away from the kiss. "What are we gonna tell the press?"
"About what?"
"They'll ask about how we heard the news, of course. We can't say we were in your apartment together. But I don't wanna lie, either. Hm. Maybe I can just tell them I broke the news to you — that's the truth anyway. Well, I can also tweak the story a bit, say I called everyone on the phone, you included, to tell you all how much I—"
"Just tell them you were with me."
Jimin doesn't say anything. He just kisses Jungkook over and over and over, thanking all the heavens they both left Busan one day to be where they are now, that the stars were kind enough to have allowed them to meet, to be brothers, best friends, lovers.
Jungkook kisses the lobe of Jimin's right ear. His favorite spot. “Are we really going to stay here on the couch until the morning?”
“I’m going to have to buy your cake in a bit,” Jimin leans in and smothers Jungkook’s neck with more kisses. “You can go rest again.”
“There’s no way I’m going back to that bed alone while you’re doing this to me.”
“Carry me then.”
“Yes, sir.” Jungkook kisses him fiercely. Then in one movement, he swoops Jimin up with both his arms, like a groom would his bride, and lifts him back to their bedroom. They don't emerge until the sun goes up.