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Coming Clean

Summary:

Summary: Sam didn’t think his crush on the cute guy in his Lit class would amount to much, but what he finds is that Gabriel is willing to accept him for who he is. (AKA in which Sam and Gabriel fall in love and there is bondage and tickling.)

Notes:

This is my submission for the SPN Kink Big Bang on tumblr. It's my first big piece of work, and I had a lot of fun writing it! Huge thanks to wordstrings who was both my beta and artist; you can check out her amazing art post here. Thanks also to my friend prodigal for giving me plenty of much-needed encouragement.

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“Remind me again why we needed to sign up for the eight a.m. class?” Sam grumbles, taking a long pull of coffee as he sits down at the back of his LIT 501 classroom. Jo falls into the seat next to him. She looks just as tired as he feels, though marginally less grouchy about it.

 

“I heard the professor’s hot.”

 

“I hate you. You do know your idea of hot and my idea of hot aren’t the same thing, don’t you?”

 

“Hush. It’s not like you wouldn’t have to take it sometime. You’ll thank me later.”

 

Sam rolls his eyes and props his chin up on his fist, internally debating whether or not it would be worth it to switch to a later section. Sure, it fills his writing requirement, but he hates morning classes, and if he has to suffer through them for another semester, even coffee might not be able to save him.

 

He’s fumbling through his phone to find the add/drop form and preparing to tell Jo that she can just suck it when he hears a chair scraping across the floor in front of him, and a voice that is far too awake for eight in the morning says, “Hey! How’s it going?”

 

Sam looks up, a greeting on the tip of his tongue, but his mind goes blank as soon as he sees the student sitting in front of him. He might reconsider dropping if those warm brown eyes and that disarming smile is what he’ll have to look forward to three mornings a week, because wow. Well, at any rate, he’s starting to think it might be a better idea not to drop this class.

 

He realizes that both Jo and Hot Guy are staring at him, waiting for him to answer. “Oh! Um, hi.” He gives Hot Guy a dorky little wave, forgetting the phone in his hand and accidentally tossing it to the floor. Sam snatches it up and bounces back upright, forcing a grin onto his face.

 

From the snort Jo gives, it’s not a good look. “You look like a maniac,” she says quietly, shoulders shaking with barely-held-in laughter.

 

“Kill me,” Sam hisses back as Hot Guy gives him a bemused smile and turns around.

 

Before Sam can say anything – some kind of defense claiming that he is, in fact, sane – their professor enters the room. Sam supposes that to anyone attracted to women she would be very hot, with long red hair and a pretty, feminine face. She places her briefcase down on the desk, pulls out a binder and says, “Good morning, everyone. This is section two of LIT 501, Creative Writing; everybody in the right place? I’m Professor Milton and I’m going to start by taking attendance…”

 

Sam listens intently as the professor goes through names until ‘Gabriel Novak’ is called out and Hot Guy raises his hand. Gabriel. That’s a nice name, if not a common one, and Sam wonders if he goes by Gabriel or Gabe. He also wonders if Gabriel is single, or into guys, or if his hair is actually as soft as it looks-

 

He’s jerked out of his thoughts when Jo elbows him sharply. “Sam Winchester?” Professor Milton says slowly. Sam gets the impression that it isn’t the first time she’s asked.

 

“Uh, here,” Sam answers. He goes to raise his hand but it knocks against his coffee cup, sending it skidding toward the edge of the desk. He barely manages to catch it before it spills, though his pencil still ends up clattering onto the floor. Sam blushes and he sees Hot Guy – Gabriel – bite his lip, clearly holding back a grin.

 

The professor raises an eyebrow but moves on to discuss the syllabus. Red-faced, Sam picks up his pencil while beside him Jo stifles her laughter.

 

“Oh, this is great,” she whispers, sounding ecstatic. “Do you always get this nervous when you have a crush?”

 

He shoots her a glare. “Shut up.”

 

“Are you kidding? I am never not going to tease you about this.”

 

Sam slides his hands underneath his glasses and presses his palms into his eyes. “This is the worst possible start to junior year.”

 

Jo just pats his head.

 

***

 

Two classes later, Sam runs into a wall when he is too busy looking at Gabriel to watch where he’s going, and he resigns himself to a semester of acting like a total moron. Jo doesn’t even attempt to reign in her amusement, but he can’t help it. Gabriel’s just… really nice to look at, and even if Sam doesn’t want to have sex with him he can appreciate the aesthetics, can’t he? He knows he doesn’t really have a chance with Gabriel, but he’s friendly and cute and – judging from the few times Sam has talked to him – funny and engaging and witty, none of which is exactly helping Sam get over his crush.

 

***

 

“Why don’t you just ask him out already?” Jo asks at the end of class one day, clearly trying not to laugh despite Sam having spent nearly the entire hour staring at the back of Gabriel’s head.

 

“I don’t know, maybe because I turn into a klutz whenever he looks at me and I’d probably end up tripping and giving us both a concussion?” The other morning Gabriel had actually said, ‘Hi, Sam,’ with a wave and a smile; Sam had waved back and promptly spilled his coffee onto his lap. After a month of LIT 501, his reaction to friendly and incredibly attractive guys apparently hasn’t improved. “Besides, I’m– you know why I can’t.”

 

It’s easy enough to daydream about being with Gabriel, but in reality… well, in reality, people tend to want to date someone who doesn’t mind having sex. Sam’s happy with who he is, most of the time; he’s asexual, he’s accepted it, and he knows now that he isn’t broken because of it. That doesn’t stop him from sometimes hating the fact that such a large part of society – college, especially – revolves around sex.

 

Jo’s smile falls. “Most people aren’t actually acephobic, you know,” she says, patting his shoulder. “They’re just…ignorant. Anyway, I bet he’d be okay with it. You’ve seen his ‘Keep calm, I’m gay’ shirt.”

 

Sam rolls his eyes. “You know, there are still a lot of people in the LGBTQ community that don’t know anything about asexuality.”

 

Jo sticks out her tongue. “Well at least you know he’s into guys,” she says with a wink. “Sometimes you just gotta take chances in life, and I still say you should go for i– crap.”

 

“What?”

 

“I forgot about my date with Charlie!” she exclaims, jumping up from her seat. “Gotta go, see you later, text me!” She grabs her bag off the table and sends Sam’s notebook and pencils flying off the desk in the process. She throws a quick ‘Sorry!’over her shoulder as she runs out the door. Sam sighs.

 

He’s almost finished packing up his bag when he hears a muffled thump, and looks up to see Gabriel vault over a row of chairs between him and Sam and prop his elbows up on Sam’s desk to grin at him. “Hey Winchester! Got a second?”

 

Sam immediately drops his notebook again, sending papers scattering across the floor. He blushes and bends over to scoop them up, flushing more when Gabriel does the same and passes him a handful of disorganized quizzes and notes. “Thanks,” he mutters, avoiding Gabriel’s gaze as he shoves everything back into his backpack. “Uh, yeah, what is it?”

 

“So that peer review thing we were supposed to do last class? I’ll be blunt: your paper sucked. Well, no, it probably didn’t. I couldn’t tell because you have, literally, the worst handwriting I’ve ever seen. It took me an half an hour to decode this,”he says, waving the paper in front of Sam’s face. Sam can see that it’s littered with bright red circles and question marks. “And to be completely honest I gave up after the first page and a half. If you type it up and send it to me then I can actually look at it and give you feedback, but right now I can’t understand anything you’ve written.”

 

Sam nods down to the ground as Gabriel presses the paper into his hand, too mortified to speak. He waits for Gabriel to walk away – preferably soon so that he can go back to his dorm and recover from his profound embarrassment - and instead startles backward when Gabriel suddenly leans forward to make eye contact with him. “So, not to make things too awkward, but do you want to go get some breakfast?”

 

“Breakfast?”

 

“Yeah. You know, the meal we eat in the mornings?” Gabriel says, sounding inordinately cheerful. “This class is way too early to get breakfast before, and I don’t know about you but I’m starving.”

 

Sam just stares, and after a moment Gabriel says, “Great! I’m going to take your lack of a ‘no’ as an emphatic ‘yes’ and assume that you’re actually dying to have breakfast.” He grabs Sam by the arm and guides him towards the door. “Have you ever been to The Grind? They’ve got great hot chocolate and coffee, but they also sell a lot of breakfast food, too. You’re going to have to try their waffles…”

 

***

 

An hour spent at the coffee shop talking with Gabriel leaves Sam feeling significantly less nervous around the other student. He’s a senior Anthropology major, and he’s only taking LIT 501 to finish up a general education requirement. He’s charismatic, talkative, and outgoing. He’s also a bit of a jerk, if the way he manages to sneak in a few teasing jibes about Sam’s clumsiness is any indication, but if anything that makes it easier for Sam to relax around Gabriel and act like himself. They end up making plans to meet again the next day, and Sam is suddenly seeing a lot more of his crush than he had originally hoped. Before he knows it, Gabriel has moved back one row in class to sit with Sam and Jo, and within a few weeks, the two of them have standing coffee dates every Monday and Wednesday morning.

 

Sam has to keep reminding himself that they aren’t dates, though. He and Gabriel are just friends, and as much as he might (definitely) want more, it just wouldn’t work. It couldn’t. It wouldn’t be fair to Gabriel, who would want more than Sam could give him if he was even interested in the first place, and it would hardly be fair to Sam to attempt yet another relationship that would probably end in heartbreak and some version of ‘it’s not me, it’s you’. That’s not to mention that – well, kinks aren’t always accepted, and his experience most people find the idea of an asexual with kinks utterly laughable.

 

No, Sam’s content with remaining friends if it means not ruining what they have. Of course, that’s easier said than done when Gabriel is funny and smart and attractive and unafraid to speak his mind and…

 

Who is he kidding? He’s screwed.

 

***

 

“How was lunch with your boyfriend?” Jo asks one day. They’re in the living room of their shared apartment, Jo reading a magazine and Sam watching television. At first he’s tempted to ignore her – it’s the third time she’s brought up the subject of him and Gabriel that week – but he knows that won’t get him anywhere.

 

He studiously avoids meeting her gaze when he says, “Who?”

 

“Wh– are you even for real? I don’t know, maybe the guy that you talk about on a daily basis. The one you’re always getting coffee with, hanging out after class with, going on movie dates with, you know, that guy.”

 

Sam slouches down in his chair. “They’re not dates,” he mutters.

 

“Might as well be. No, don’t give me that face, I’m tired of hearing about him all the time.”

 

“You’d hear about him all the time if we were dating too,” Sam points out.

 

“Yeah, but at least then I wouldn’t have to deal with your pining.”

 

Sam is about to protest the ‘pining’ comment, but the look Jo throws him is screaming ‘don’t even think about it’. She continues, “Just tell him you have a huge gay crush on him and you want to do cute, non-sexy things together.”

 

Sam stares at her for a minute. “You can’t be serious.”

 

“I am so serious.”

 

“I can’t just say that!”

 

“You can, because you,” she jabs a finger in his direction, “are a catch, Sam Winchester. You deserve to be dated, and I deserve not to be witness to any more of your sad pining. I’ll even give you some incentive: if you ask him out, I’ll stop conspiring with Dean to throw you a clown-themed birthday party.”

 

“You– what?”

 

“Clowns, Sam. Clowns everywhere.”

 

***

 

The next day that Sam goes to see Gabriel, Jo sends him a total of thirty-seven consecutive text messages within the span of two minutes. Sam eventually silences his phone but the notifications keep coming.

 

Looking amused, Gabriel asks him, “Something you want to tell me about?”

 

He’s planning to say that his friend is just trying to bother him – the words are all planned out in his head – but instead he blurts out, “My roommate thinks we should date.”

 

He wants to punch himself in the face as soon as the words leave his mouth.

 

To his surprise, Gabriel shrugs and says, “I think we should too. I mean, I don’t usually get coffee four times a week when I’m just friends with someone. I don’t even like coffee. So, dating! Boyfriends. Do you want to make it official?”

 

Sam smiles back, though hesitantly, and for the first time he regrets not mentioning his sexuality to Gabriel. It isn’t exactly his fault; when would there have been a good time to bring it up in casual conversation? There’s no avoiding it now, though. Besides, Gabriel won’t care. Probably. Sam takes a deep breath. At any rate, it would surely be less painful for Gabriel to want nothing to do with him now than it would for him to have a negative reaction over finding out later.

 

Gabriel is frowning at the change in his expression. “Sam, what’s wrong?”

 

He glances around. There aren’t many people in the small coffee shop, and none of them are sitting next to Sam and Gabriel, but he still lowers his voice when he says, more to the table than to Gabriel, “I’m asexual. Ace.”

 

Gabriel leans back in his chair and hmm’s softly.

 

Before he can speak, Sam adds, “I just want to tell you now. That way you can…decide if it’s something you want to get into. A relationship with me, I mean.”He presses his lips together.

 

Gabriel makes another thoughtful noise. “Gonna be honest with you Sam, the only time I’ve ever really heard ‘asexual’was in high school Bio.” When Sam flushes, Gabriel says, “No, I just– can you tell me what it means?”

 

“Well, you know that most people experience sexual attraction, right? Like, if you’re heterosexual you’re attracted to the opposite sex, if you’re homosexual you’re attracted to the same sex, that kinda thing…” He trails off.

 

“O-kay,” Gabriel says with a shrug. “So you’re…”

 

“Not attracted to anybody.”

 

He gives that a moment to sink in. When he forces himself to look up and meet Gabriel’s eyes, the other man is frowning slightly. “So you’ve never wanted to have sex with anyone?”

 

Sam gives a tight nod.

 

“Ever?”

 

“Um. Yeah. I mean, it’s different for everybody, but for me it’s not like- I can still like people, you know? I still like romance, and as far as relationships go I still like hand-holding and kissing and going on dates and all that stuff, just… without sex.” When he waits a moment and doesn’t receive a response from Gabriel, he continues, “I– I really like you Gabe, but I get it if you don’t want to get involved with me when I can’t really reciprocate. In terms of sex, I mean.” He cringes, and decides that it’s probably a good place for him to stop talking.

 

“So basically you’re totally normal, you just don’t want sex.” Sam grimaces a little at the word ‘normal’ and Gabriel winces. “No, wait. I didn’t– shit– that was wrong, I didn’t mean normal– fuck, I’m bad at this.”

 

“No, it’s okay. I mean, you’ve got it right, I just– I don’t know how to explain it. Sex has never been something I’ve needed, and I don’t get it. It’s just never been very appealing to me.”

 

Although Gabriel keeps looking thoughtful and doesn’t respond immediately, and although Sam’s face is still flushed and his heart is beating too fast, he nevertheless feels the constriction in his chest ease slightly. There just isn’t much more that he can say, and he (almost) feels prepared for the inevitable ‘no’ that Gabriel has yet to say.

 

“So we can still date,” Gabriel says suddenly, and Sam’s eyes snap up. Gabriel gives him a small shrug. “Right?”

 

“Yeah,” Sam says slowly. “Would you want to, though? I’m not– I won’t change my mind.”

 

“I got that. But so what? I like sex just as much as the next– well, I like sex. But it’s not like I’m incapable of going without it. Believe it or not I wasn’t always this handsome, and people weren’t exactly lining up to have sex with the sixteen-year-old dorky midget version of me.” Though the disbelief doesn’t quite leave his face, Sam can’t help but snort out a laugh and Gabriel kicks him under the table. “Fine, the dorkier, shorter version of me,”he concedes with a grin.

 

It almost seems too good to be true. In Sam’s experience, telling someone he likes that he’s ace has generally resulted in a “sorry, but no thanks,”or at the very least more skepticism that he was sure he really, really wouldn’t ever want anything more than cuddling and making out. “You really don’t care?”

 

Gabriel shrugs again. “I like you. I’m not saying it’ll definitely work out or anything, but I like you a lot, Sam. I think it’d be a loss for both of us if we didn’t at least try to make this work.” He shoots Sam a smile. “Besides, we’ve been more or less dating for the past two months and we haven’t even kissed yet. If we can manage that, then who needs sex?”

 

***

 

It takes them a while to become comfortable around each other. For a while, “Is this okay?” is something that Gabriel is constantly asking; is touching here okay, is touching there okay, is making out okay…Sam can tell that he’s trying, and it means… more than a lot. Finally though, he tells Gabriel that it isn’t necessary. Sam is perfectly capable of letting him know when he’s uncomfortable with something, and anyway, he rarely has problems with kissing and cuddling.

 

Sam’s problems have more to do with insecurity. While he doesn’t doubt that Gabriel cares about him, some days he still can’t help but worry that he isn’t enough. That he isn’t giving enough.

 

On the first night that Sam sleeps over at Gabriel’s apartment, he asks, “Do you miss having sex?” Gabriel is sprawled across his side of the bed, half asleep. He makes a noise that sounds affirmative, but Sam can’t really tell. He sighs.

 

Gabriel groans and rolls over, latching onto Sam like an octopus. “I don’t care if we never have sex,” he murmurs tiredly into Sam’s throat. “I’m just happy being around you. Now would you go to sleep already?”

 

***

 

“You should start keeping some clothes over here,” Gabriel says, the tenth time that Sam sleeps over at his apartment. Sam’s rummaging around in the cupboard of the apartment’s tiny kitchen, in the process of making breakfast, and in his haste to respond he knocks his head against the cupboard door. He stumbles backwards, swearing and rubbing the smarting spot on his forehead while Gabriel snorts with laughter.

 

“Glad you find this so amusing,” he mutters.

 

Gabriel shakes his head, still chuckling. “Sorry, are you okay? It’s not funny, but I was wondering what happened to you being so clumsy all the time.”

 

“Oh. I– um.” When Sam blushingly explains that he used to be too nervous to so much as talk to Gabriel like a normal person without tripping, dropping things, or running into solid objects, Gabriel doesn’t stop laughing until Sam shoves him off the counter.

 

***

 

Four months into their relationship and too many times sleeping over at each other’s places to count, Sam wakes up with Gabriel lying half on top of him, their feet tangled together. He smiles at Gabriel’s wild bedhead before glancing over at the clock.

 

He yawns, then reaches over to shake Gabriel’s shoulder. “Wake up, sleepyhead.”

 

“Five more minutes,” Gabriel murmurs.

 

Sam chuckles. “It’s already past eleven. Get up, I’m hungry.”

 

“Then go eat something.”

 

“You’re on top of me. Anyway, you need to eat too.”

 

As if on cue, Sam’s stomach growls. Gabriel whines and rolls over, burying his head underneath a pillow. “Nooo.”

 

“Ye-es.” Sam props himself up on his side and grabs the pillow, tossing it onto the floor before pulling a pouting Gabriel up against his chest. “You’re such a baby in the morning,” he teases when Gabriel immediately wriggles around and nuzzles underneath his chin. Gabriel mumbles something into his neck that he doesn’t catch. “What was that?”

 

“Shut up, I’m sleeping.”

 

Sam rolls his eyes. His hand slides up from Gabriel’s back to pinch at his slightly chubby side, and he grins at the soft squeak that it elicits. “Wake up,” he prods, fingers creeping down to wriggle against Gabriel’s tummy.

 

It isn’t until Sam starts poking at Gabriel’s hips that he jerks away with a giggle before scowling at Sam when he starts snickering. “Now that’s just cruel. It’s not even noon, on a Saturday.”

 

“You’re so-” His breath whooshes away when Gabriel suddenly knocks him onto his back and effectively pins him down by sitting on his hips.

 

“I believe I deserve a heartfelt apology,” Gabriel announces, still looking slightly bleary-eyed though nevertheless managing to smirk at Sam. His hands clutch Sam’s sides as he leans in closer. “One that you are going to give to me.”

 

“You’re ridiculous.” Sam is given no warning before Gabriel’s hands go from squeezing his sides to actively digging into them with wiggling fingers, and he bursts into laughter. “Wahahait! Gahahahabe-”

 

“That didn’t sound like an apology,” Gabriel singsongs, tickling Sam’s belly.

 

“I’m sohohohorry!”

 

“No do-overs.”

 

“Wahahahait! That’s nohohot fahahahair-” Sam tries to resist shoving Gabriel off of him as he squirms around on the bed, laughing freely. He doesn’t want the tickling to stop but he can’t hold back the “Plehehehease!” that escapes his lips as Gabriel’s fingers poke at his ribs. Gabriel laughs but acquiesces, falling over and propping himself up on his elbows next to Sam.

 

“Sorry,” Gabriel says, grinning and looking entirely unapologetic. “That was mean.”

 

“It wasn’t that mean,” Sam says before his brain-to-mouth filter can resume working.

 

Gabriel laughs. “Oh yeah? Are you saying you like being tickled?”

 

Sam bites his lip and blushes, staring up at the ceiling. “Um.”

 

Sam is very physically affectionate, something that anyone who knows him well is aware of. He loves attention, and as far back as he can remember he has always been incredibly tactile, enjoying hugging, cuddling, being close to someone else. He takes a lot of pleasure – more than is normal, he sometimes thinks – from even small, casual touches; slinging an arm around a shoulder, the brushing of a hand against the back of his, fingers intertwining with his own.

 

The way he feels about tickling, though, can’t exactly be explained simply by his love for affection and contact; no, it could be more aptly described as a kink.

 

“I– um– yes,” he blurts out before he can convince himself not to say anything. When he is met with nearly a minute of unbearable silence, he peeks over; Gabriel is staring at him curiously. His expression doesn’t look unkind, but Sam worries his bottom lip for another moment before muttering, “I know it’s kind of weird.”

 

“It’s not that weird,” Gabriel disagrees, wrapping an arm around Sam’s chest and pulling him into an embrace that has him relaxing almost immediately. “I just wouldn’t have guessed. A tickling kink, huh?”

 

“Yeah. It’s sort of always been a thing for me. I– it’s okay if you don’t get it, a lot of people don’t–”

 

“What do you mean?" Gabriel interrupts him with a frown. “Has anyone given you shit about it?”

 

“Yes. Well, kind of.” Sam sighs. “Not in a mean way, but…well, I’ve only told a couple people and they all know that I’m ace, and I guess they didn’t get how it could be a kink without sex being involved.” He shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s not sexual, I just like it.”

 

When Gabriel looks at him expectantly, Sam flounders for a moment. “I– I don’t know how well I can explain it. Tickling is– for me, it’s fun and silly and playful, but it’s also really intimate, you know? I like being tickled by someone I trust, and sometimes I just…like being able to be vulnerable.”

 

He resists the urge to cover his face and instead watches Gabriel who, in a move that is both surprising and not, only nods understandingly. “Okay,” he says. His hand slides forward a little and his thumb begins brushing slow circles in the hollow above Sam’s collarbone. “That makes sense.”

 

When nothing else is said, Sam raises his eyebrows. “That’s it?”

 

“Yes?”

 

Sam blinks. He isn’t sure what he’d been expecting, but it wasn’t for Gabriel to just…be okay with it. “Seriously?”

 

“Lots of people have kinks, Sammitch. It’s not that difficult for me to process that you have one. And as far as kinks go, tickling’s pretty tame.”

 

“But you don’t even seem that surprised. You really don’t think it’s–” His breath catches in his throat. “You don’t think Im weird?”

 

“Are you kidding? This just makes you ten times more adorable.” Gabriel wiggles his fingers over Sam’s neck and he giggles, flinching away instinctively. “See? Adorable. And you know, I feel like I should have expected it, with you being such a cuddlebear and all.”

 

“Like you’re any better,” Sam scoffs, though he can’t keep a smile off his face.

 

Gabriel grins back at him before his face turns slightly hesitant. With forced nonchalance he says, “So while we’re on the topic of caring and sharing, I kind of have a kink too.”

 

Sam’s arm, which is wrapped around Gabriel’s waist, tightens slightly. “Wanna tell me about it? Promise I won’t judge.”

 

“You don’t even know what it is yet,” he mutters. “But, um, it’s bondage.”

 

“Ah. Being tied up?”

 

“No, I’d rather do the tying. Uh…I guess I like it for a lot of the same reasons you like tickling. It’s exciting, and I like the idea of someone trusting me enough to let me tie them up and make them vulnerable.”

 

Sam has to admit, the idea doesn’t sound unappealing to him either. “That makes sense,” he says, echoing Gabriel’s earlier words. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

Gabriel relaxes and smiles at Sam. “Yeah, well, I figured you wouldn’t be judgy about it.” They lie in comfortable silence for a few minutes before Gabriel says mischievously, “So, where exactly are you ticklish?”

 

Sam blushes, and his heart begins fluttering in nervous anticipation. “Nowhere. Uh. I mean–” he clamps his mouth shut at Gabriel’s knowing smirk.

 

“You’re not gonna tell me?” Gabriel asks. “Well lucky for you, I’m not above conducting some tests to find out.”

 

“Well– wait a second– Gahahahahabe!”

 

****

 

As days pass, and then weeks, Gabriel doesn’t look at him funny or act any different and for the most part things go on as normal, save for the fact that tickling is slipped into more of their interactions. When Sam is standing in the kitchen Gabriel will come up behind him and poke his sides, or they will be lying in bed in the morning and Gabriel will suddenly tickle Sam until he’s fully awake.

 

Or a cuddle session in front of the television will turn into a one-sided tickle fight.

 

“Hey!” Sam automatically tries to squirm away from the fingers that wriggle underneath his arm, though he doesn’t get very far. While comfortable, sitting in between Gabriel’s legs makes it easier for Gabriel to pin him down. He starts giggling as Gabriel’s fingers spider down from his armpits to his sides. “I t-thought we wehehere cuddlihihihing.”

 

“Well, we were cuddling,” Gabriel says, slipping his hands underneath Sam’s t-shirt and tickling his ribs. “However, I happen to know for a fact that you like this just as much as cuddling. Right, Samsquatch?”

 

Sam squeaks and laughs even harder when Gabriel’s fingers poke into the sensitive skin beneath his rib cage. “Buhuhut it t-tihihihihickles!”

 

“No, really? And here I thought that was the point.”

 

Instead of wiggling free, Sam twists around and buries his face in Gabriel’s chest, laughing when Gabriel wraps his arms around Sam’s waist and starts tickling his sides. Gabriel chuckles. “Aw, aren’t you adorable. It’s cute how you don’t even try to get away.”

 

Though his face is undoubtedly already flushed from the tickling, Sam feels his cheeks grow a little hotter. “Gahahahabe, stohohohohop!”

 

“Stop what? This?” Gabriel’s fingers worm under his arms and Sam automatically clamps down his arms, trapping Gabriel’s hands in his armpits. It doesn’t do anything to stop him from continuing to tickle Sam.

 

“Nohohohoho,” he giggles, “Stop teheheheasing! Ihihihihi– it mahahakes it tihihickle wohohorse!”

 

“Oh does it,” Gabriel says, sounding delighted. “Thanks for telling me Sammitch. But you know, if you think this is bad, wait until I’m actually trying to tease you.”

 

Sam finally does try to get away then, but thanks to laughter-induced incoordination he finds himself lying flat on the couch with Gabriel pinning his wrists down by his sides. He’s torn over what to do next - he could easily push Gabriel off, but does he want to is the question – and so he fails to notice Gabriel’s hand holding onto his knee until it squeezes.

 

They’re both taken by surprise when Sam honest-to-god shrieks and bucks so sharply that Gabriel falls off the couch. Sam immediately curls up into a ball and buries his face in one of the couch pillows. After a few moments, when it doesn’t feel quite as much like his face is on fire, he peeks over at Gabriel, who is grinning at him from the floor in amusement.

 

“So,” he drawls, propping himself up on his elbows. “Looks like there’s one spot you neglected to mention.”

 

Sam nods, still embarrassed. “Sorry! I– yeah, my knees are um, really ticklish.”

 

“Right.” Gabriel gets to his feet and sits back down on the couch, falling into the space between Sam and the couch back and spooning him from behind. “And do you react like that every time someone touches your knees?”

 

“No, not usually. I just… wasn’t prepared for it.”

 

“Hm. So can I tickle them?”

 

“Now?” Sam squeaks.

 

Gabriel laughs. “Later. I don’t want to break you. Right now we should cuddle.”

 

Sam hums in agreement. “Okay. It’s my turn to be the big spoon.”

 

He can hear the pout in Gabriel’s voice when he says, “I wanted to be the big spoon!” Sam twists around to face his boyfriend, grinning.

 

“Need me to convince you to give me a turn? I happen to remember that I’m not the only one who’s ticklish.”

 

“Well wait, now, let’s not be hasty,” Gabriel protests, leaning back as much as he can while Sam’s hands latch onto his belly. “H-Hey, Sahahaham! Fihihihine, I’ll behehehe thehehehe little spoohohohohoon!”

 

***

 

“I feel kinda selfish sometimes,” Sam muses one rainy afternoon, curled up on the couch with the television on as Gabriel brings their hot chocolate in from the kitchen. “I mean, you tickle me all the time but we still haven’t done any…bondage stuff.”He wills his cheeks, which flushed both at the mention of tickling and bondage, to return to their normal color.

 

“I’d hardly call that selfish Sammy,” Gabriel says, setting their mugs down on the floor before flopping down next to him. “In case you haven’t noticed, I like tickling you." With a grin he wiggles his fingers over Sam’s stomach, as if to prove his point.

 

Sam giggles and swats his hand away. “Still.”

 

“Do you want to try bondage?”Gabriel asks curiously. “It’s okay if you don’t. Not everyone’s into it.”

 

“I’ve never done it before, but…I want to. I’ve been thinking about it a lot and I think it would be really fun.”

 

A bright, genuine smile spreads across Gabriel’s face before it morphs into a smirk. “It would also make it a lot easier for me to tickle you.”

 

He blushes. “There’s that too. So did you want to try it? I mean, I guess we’d need to get…um, stuff.”

 

“You mean stuff like rope? Or handcuffs?” Sam knows it’s stupid but he can already feel his cheeks heating up, and Gabriel laughs at him. “Aw, I didn’t know those words would make you all blushy too. I think we should get cuffs, rope can be more tricky to use. While we’re at it, we should probably get some feathers-”

 

Sam whines and grabs a throw pillow to shove on top of his face. “You’re so mean.”

 

Gabriel laughs at him again. “And you’re ridiculous,” he says fondly, grabbing the pillow and tossing it on the floor. “Let me grab my laptop, I know a couple of sites we can look at.”

 

***

 

A couple of days later, a package containing padded wrist cuffs, feathers and brushes, and everything else they decided to purchase arrives in the mail. Sam isn’t quite sure how he manages to get through all of his classes that day, considering how long the idea of being tied up and tickled by Gabriel has been on his mind, but somehow they both make it through school, work, and their dinner before Gabriel impatiently steers him towards the bedroom.

 

Sam stops to drop his plate in the sink and by the time he enters the bedroom, Gabriel has already stripped down to his boxers and is sitting on the edge of the bed. He leans back on his arms, gazing at Sam. “I think you’re gonna need less clothes for this,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. He grins when Sam blushes.

 

“You’re incorrigible,” Sam mutters. He pulls off his shirt in one fluid movement, then shucks off his pants. He goes to take his socks off, but Gabriel tugs on his arm and he falls onto the bed, grunting when his back hits the mattress.

 

“I’ll deal with those later.” The slightly predatory assurance sends a shiver down Sam’s spine, and his toes curl inward in anticipation. He swings his legs up onto the bed and raises his arms above his head.

 

Gabriel smirks. “Eager, are we?”

 

He grabs the padded cuffs from the bedside table and fastens each of Sam’s arms to the bedposts. Sam’s breath hitches as one of his wrists is secured, then the other. He is struck with the realization of how exposed and vulnerable he is, and he feels another twinge of excitement. He gives the restraints an experimental tug; they don’t budge.

 

“I wonder what I should do,” Gabriel muses, climbing back onto the bed and straddling Sam’s thighs. “Now that I’ve got you right where I want you.”

 

Sam bites his lip.

 

“I know that you’re ticklish here,” Gabriel says, trailing his hands down Sam’s chest. “But you’re also ticklish here.” The tips of his fingers circle around Sam’s belly button, and his gaze roves from Sam’s neck down to his waist. “And that’s not even counting your adorably sensitive feet,” he says, reaching back to tweak Sam’s big toe. Sam lets out a soft squeak. “See my problem Sammy? There are just too many options. I don’t suppose you have a preference?”

 

“I- I don’t know,” Sam says, unable to completely fight back a smile. He doesn’t feel prepared for the unbearable sensation of what is yet to come, but at the same time he yearns for Gabriel’s fingers to be wiggling over his skin. “Just get it over with.”

 

“Get what over with?” Gabriel asks innocently, drumming his fingers on Sam’s stomach. The muscles twitch underneath his touch.

 

“You know what!”

 

“Well I want you to ask for it.” Gabriel drags his fingernails down Sam’s side, just lightly enough to make Sam gasp and flinch away. “Tell me, Sam. What exactly do you want me to do to you?”

 

Sam huffs out a laugh. “I want you to stop being such a jerk and just tickle me already.”

 

“So demanding.” Gabriel begins lightly raking his fingers back and forth across Sam’s stomach, drawing bubbly giggles out of him as he squirms a bit in the cuffs. It’s not as bad as he expected it to be – but of course, right after that thought passes through his head, Gabriel’s fingers start skittering across his stomach and sides.



                  

 

Sam yelps in surprise before dissolving into laughter. “Gahahahabe!”

 

“What’s wrong, Sammitch?” Gabriel asks with a wide grin, moving higher to torment Sam’s ribs. “Does it tickle?”

 

“Yehehehes!” Sam tries to pull his arms down when Gabriel goes to tickle his armpits, but the cuffs don’t allow him to do so. “It tihihihickles a l-lohohohot!”

 

“That’s exactly what I’m going for.” Gabriel’s hands return to Sam’s stomach, where they proceed to test each and every bit of bare skin for ticklishness. The extra sensitive spot beneath his ribs is given particular attention, as is his belly button; after wiggling his finger around inside Sam’s innie, Gabriel leans down and begins nipping at the edges of his belly button.

 

It’s when Gabriel begins blowing raspberries on his stomach that Sam screeches and collapses into hysterical laughter. Perhaps sensing that he’s losing the ability to breathe, Gabriel pulls away and gives Sam a few minutes to catch his breath.

 

After the residual giggles have died down, Gabriel asks, “Everything okay so far?” When Sam nods, the grin reappears full-force on Gabriel’s face and he leans down to give Sam a kiss. “Good, because I’ve got a lot more planned for you.”

 

Gabriel gives Sam’s side one more pinch before sliding off the bed. He plucks something out of the box on the table, purposely obstructing Sam’s view of the object with his body. He then climbs back up onto the bed and sits back down – only this time, he situates himself lower on Sam’s legs, facing his feet.

 

“It’s been way too long since I’ve tickled your feet,” he says conversationally as he peels Sam’s socks off. “They’re always so temptingly sensitive.”

 

Though Sam wants to keep his feet flexed, he can’t help but curl his toes inward when Gabriel runs a finger down the bottom of one foot. Without any other warning Gabriel’s fingers launch a torturous assault on his feet, scritching across his soles and his heels with just the right amount of fingernail.

 

Sam’s nervous giggles are quickly replaced with full, deep laughter as Gabriel’s thumbs knead mercilessly into Sam’s arches, then travel up to his toes which are still curved inward to protect the sensitive junctions where they connect to his feet. Gabriel wiggles his fingers over the tips of Sam’s toes and they reflexively twitch away; he doesn’t realize that the movement leaves his toes flexed and exposed until Gabriel’s nails are scribbling underneath them. Sam howls with laughter and though Gabriel’s position on his calves makes it so that he can’t escape, he nevertheless attempts to jerk his feet away.

 

For a moment Gabriel’s fingers disappear from beneath his toes and Sam immediately scrunches up his feet. Unfortunately the reprieve is all too brief, and a few seconds later Gabriel carefully pulls back the toes on one foot. Sam expects to feel fingers wriggling over his foot, but instead he feels something lighter, softer, and far more ticklish. He bursts into laughter as Gabriel drags what is unmistakably a feather back and forth under his toes. The feather also saws in between each of Sam’s toes, and the same treatment is given to his other foot. By the time Gabriel is finished, Sam is practically beside himself with laughter.

 

It takes him a short while to catch his breath, and he only notices that Gabriel has gotten off the bed when he hears him say, “I knew this would be fun, but I didn’t think it would be this much fun.” He looks over and sees Gabriel shoot him a smirk.

 

“Are you d-done?” Sam gasps, only a small part of him hoping to hear the word ‘yes’.

 

“Are you kidding? I haven’t even had the chance to use all of the nice, new tools we bought.” Sam cranes his neck to watch Gabriel rummage through the cardboard box that is still sitting innocuously on the bedside table.

 

This could be fun.” Gabriel pulls out a black silk blindfold, which Sam had all but forgotten purchasing. Butterflies flit around in his stomach as Gabriel turns toward him, grinning. “You don’t really need to be able to see me for this, do you?”

 

Sam shakes his head, excitement coursing through him, and Gabriel slips the silky fabric over his eyes. His skin suddenly feels ten times more sensitive, and he takes in a deep, shuddering breath as Gabriel settles back down on his thighs.

 

“I think we bought too many feathers, Sammy, I don’t know which one to choose. Hmm…the one I used for your feet is too stiff. Maybe…” Sam wishes that he could see what Gabriel is doing. “Ah, this one looks good. It’s long and soft and very fluffy.” The aforementioned feather ghosts across the shell of his ear. “I’m kind of sorry you can’t see it, but at least you’ll get to feel it. I bet it’ll tickle a lot.”

 

Sam’s head falls back and he groans in frustration. “Gabe, stop teasing!”

 

Gabriel chuckles but obliges, and a second later the feather is swirling around inside Sam’s belly button. He giggles and sucks in his stomach as the fluffy tip brushes against the bottom of his innie. It doesn’t tickle nearly as much as it had on his feet but he nevertheless finds the light tickling to be just as pleasurable, if not more so.

 

After a few moments, maybe because Gabriel isn’t getting the reaction he wants, he presses his lips against Sam’s chest and begins planting light, gentle kisses all over his skin. Gabriel slowly makes his way up to Sam’s neck before moving back down his chest and over his ribs. When he reaches Sam’s stomach he starts nibbling at the sensitive skin and flicking his tongue inside Sam’s navel, which combined with the feather still stroking his sides and ribs is enough to send him into a fit of laughter.

 

Eventually Gabriel’s mouth is replaced with a second feather, gliding across his skin in tandem with the first. They work their way across Sam’s upper body, lingering in his armpits where the ticklishness of the downy fluff sets him squirming in the cuffs again.

 

With another flick across Sam’s shoulders the feathers disappear from his skin, and there’s a rustling sound as Gabriel presumably puts them back in the box. The blindfold remains on though, and after a minute Gabriel places his hands on Sam’s chest.

 

“Alright, was that everywhere? Let’s see…stomach, check.” Gabriel briefly scribbles his fingers across Sam’s lower belly. “Belly button, check. Armpits, check.” He keeps naming Sam’s ticklish spots, giving them a quick poke or tickle when he says each one. “Feet, check. What could I– ohhh,”he says, and Sam just knows which spot Gabriel is theatrically acknowledging.

 

“It would be such a shame if I forgot about your knees, wouldn’t it?” Gabriel continues. Sam can feel Gabriel turning around, placing his hands on Sam’s legs directly above his knees, and he starts giggling nervously in anticipation.

 

“Gahahahabe, wahahait! Dohohohon’t-” He breaks off with a squeak when Gabriel gives his kneecaps a quick squeeze. “Nohohohoho!”

 

“Why not?” Gabriel asks, a grin in his voice.

 

“Ihihit tihihickles! My knees ahahare the wohohohorst.”

 

Sam giggles and flinches away from Gabriel’s fingers stroking over his thighs. He almost misses Gabriel saying, “Oh, I know that. Are you saying you don’t want me to tickle your knees?”and then he’s torn between yes, please and no no no no no.

 

“Ihihi- only for a mihihinute,” he bargains, reflexively jerking away again when Gabriel runs a finger across the crease behind his knee. “Thahahat’s it.”

 

“Two minutes,” Gabriel counters. At Sam’s hesitant nod he wastes no time in digging his fingers into Sam’s kneecaps and scribbling his fingers over the back of his knees, eliciting a sudden shriek of laughter. It’s a mere matter of seconds before Sam’s laughter turns silent. He’s not sure if it’s because Gabriel’s just been tickling him for so long, or because his knees really are that bad, and he’s also not sure exactly how long Gabriel continues tickling him for, but when it finally stops Sam is exhausted, his limbs feeling like they’re made of jelly.

 

He doesn’t process Gabriel letting him out of the cuffs and his giggles are still petering out when the blindfold slides off his eyes and Gabriel looks down at him. “You okay?”

 

“Yeah,” Sam says, wanting to alleviate any concerns Gabriel might have but at the same time feeling too tired to function. “I don’t think I can move, though. But in a good way.” Now that all of the overwhelming sensations have faded away he’s left completely sated, eyelids heavy and muscles relaxed and a bright, warm feeling in his chest at the smile Gabriel’s giving him. “Come cuddle me.”

 

Gabriel laughs, obediently sliding his arms around Sam’s waist and curling up against his back. “I didn’t think that a little bit of tickling would tire you out this much,” he teases quietly. “So you liked it?”

 

Sam decides to let the ‘little bit of tickling’ comment go. “I don’t know if ‘like’ is a strong enough word. That was… incredible. Did you like it too?”

 

“Oh, I definitely liked it,” Gabriel murmurs against the back of Sam’s neck. “More than liked it. In fact, I think we’re going to need to have another tickle session soon. Maybe using those paintbrushes we bought,” he muses.

 

Sam’s feet twitch reflexively at the word ‘paintbrushes’ and he gently elbows Gabriel’s stomach. “Stop,” he whines.

 

“Stop what?” Gabriel asks with faux innocence. “All I said was paintbru-”

 

“No more talking,” Sam interrupts.

 

Gabriel chuckles. “Why, are you going to take a nap now?”

 

Sam nods. “Mm-hm, ‘nd you are too.” He wiggles around and kisses Gabriel’s nose before resting his head on the other man’s chest. “Love you.”

 

“Love you too, Sam,” Gabriel says, his voice fond and affectionate.