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A sharp scream echoed off the walls as Sarah woke. Her nails scrabbled at the sides of her coffin as she pushed herself out and collapsed in a heap on the floor. She could feel her chest tightening as she tried to calm her racing thoughts, and dug her nails into the stone below her. Wide eyes staring blankly, she missed the sound of the other coffin opening.
“Did you manage to fall out or something?”
Startled by the sound, she flinched as her eyes shot up to the figure before her. After a few seconds, she recognized that it was Herbert looking down at her. She said nothing, unable to manage to form words as she struggled to make sense of everything. At the lack of her usual witty retort, he looked over at her and took in her frantic state.
“Sarah?”
She gave a small shake of her head and wrapped her arms around herself.
Herbert climbed out of his own coffin carefully, silently regarding her before he settled himself down next to her with his long legs stretched out in front of him. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
Sarah continued staring off into space. When she did speak, her voice was barely louder than a whisper. “Where’s Alfred?”
He frowned, disliking her evasion. “In the library. He decided to stay up a little longer. Something about some translation errors…”
Sarah again said nothing as she curled further inward.
“What’s wrong?”
She shook her head.
Again: “What’s wrong, Sarah?” This time, his tone left no room for argument.
Sarah turned her head slightly as she spoke. “Nightmare…” she managed to say, though it was barely audible. She felt as though the air was heavy with her admittance, and she felt weak being reduced to such a mess by something so mundane.
Whatever Herbert thought, he didn’t say. Instead, he stood up. Sarah ignored this, assuming he meant to leave her in the dark, until she felt the soft silk of her shawl being draped over her shoulders. Herbert sat back down, moving closer and pulling her close to him.
“What—”
“Hush.”
She fell silent, finding comfort in the arm around her shoulders and the silky feeling of the black fabric between her fingers as she pulled the shawl closer. Slowly, Sarah could feel the stress of her sudden and unexpected awakening start to ebb away. When Hebert began playing with the ends of her hair, she finally relaxed.
This struck her as odd. She hadn’t expected Herbert to stop and help her, as they spent most of their time either avoiding or antagonizing each other. He finally broke the silence between them.
“I get them too…I’ve had them since I was a child.”—Sarah glanced up— “…and I’ve always found that having someone close helps.”
Sarah nodded, leaning her head back against him. “I almost thought they’d gone away.”
“It’s okay.”
But she shook her head vehemently. “No. It shouldn’t bother me anymore.”
“What shouldn’t?” He asked it in the same soft tone he used to say everything else. As much as she hated to admit it, it kept her calm.
She chewed on her lip for a moment before answering. “Being locked in my room.” She felt Herbert nod, and she continued. “It’s been a while since I’ve had the nightmares. I think having Krolock here while I sleep has been helping, but he’s away, and I’m somewhere enclosed, by myself…” She trailed off.
Herbert tightened his arm around her as she angled herself more towards him. They were both strangely comfortable considering they never usually got this close unless they were fighting over something.
He spoke again. “Mine are always about being alone. Father was…difficult while I was growing up. I didn’t see him often, and when I did he was berating me about something …It didn’t get better until I got older, and I wouldn’t let him hide anymore. Nonetheless, I still worry he’ll disappear again, and it’ll be more shut doors.”
“Neglect sucks.”
He reached up to ruffle her hair. “Is that what it was? I thought that was how every parent raised their children.” A bitter tone colored his voice.
Sarah shrugged. “I think we have more in common than we’d rather admit.”
“You had a room, I had a castle.”
She grimaced. “At least you could take a bath without being yelled at.”
He scoffed. “No, just for going through about six tutors and eight nurses before the age of fifteen.”
Sarah pulled back, her brows raised. He smiled.
“To be fair, I think my father ate most of them.”
She laughed, unable to help herself.
“There were other things,” he continued, “but I was a bit of a brat. I’m half surprised I survived to adulthood with how I behaved.”
They fell into a comfortable silence, something that was not as heavy as it was before, but still thick enough that Sarah could feel herself growing morose once again. She shut her eyes, silently cursing whatever it was that had drawn her lover away from her with barely a word of explanation.
Herbert was again, the one to break the silence. “I hated you because of Father.”
Sarah intently studied the pattern of the stone on the floor, unsure if she should speak or not. She waited, but when nothing else was said, she replied, “I got the attention you wanted.”
He clicked his tongue. “Mmh, normally it never bothered me when he would go find someone. But over the years with you, he almost sounded concerned once or twice. He never noticed it. But I did. All that fuss over a lonely little peasant girl.”
She frowned at his description of her, but he shook his head. “It doesn’t matter now. we both have what we need.” He looked down at her, and then at the empty coffin, they were sitting against. “Well, most of us.”
Herbert stood up, holding his hand out for Sarah. She took it, and he pulled her up.
“It’s late. I should get Alfred to bed, and I don’t think you can go the rest of the night without falling out of your coffin again.”
There it was, the sass Sarah typically expected from him. She smiled softly. He was right, though; she wasn’t going to be getting through the next few nights by herself.
“But where—”
“Hush. Just follow.”
Sarah followed him out of the crypt and through the winding hallways. “I’m sorry I haven’t been making it very easy since I got back—“
“—it’s fine, Sarah. I was raised the son of a count. sharing is not one of my strong suits. although you did eat my boyfriend.”
She found the wall they were passing by incredibly interesting.
“Do you think we would have gotten along if everything had gone the way it was supposed to?” she asked.
Herbert pursed his lips. “Not likely.”
She nodded. Conversation didn’t seem necessary any longer as they walked through a few more of the many halls and stopped in front of—
“This isn’t my room.”
“Thought you could do with one better,” Herbert said, pushing the door open and gesturing for her to enter. “Father’s room. I thought it might help.”
Upon entering, Sarah recognized it immediately. “This is where I spent the night—”
Herbert leaned against the doorway, seemingly back to his usual self. “If I remember rightly, it was "convenient".”
She snorted. “Sounds about right.”
“There’s the armoire. You can raid it for whatever you like.” He waved his hand in the general direction from his place by the door.
Sarah turned as he started to leave. “Thank you.”
He paused, inclining his head before he disappeared. She looked around the room again, taking in the decor. Unsurprisingly, not much had changed since her last visit.
“Oh, Sarah?”
She turned to find Herbert again leaning through the door. She gave him a half smile, already anticipating his next words.
“I won’t tell if you won’t,” she said. Herbert smirked.
“Well, we do have reputations to maintain, Stargirl.”
He left; off, she assumed, to the library. She tried to ignore the pang of loneliness at the thought of Herbert going to collect Alfred and how much she longed for a familiar pair of arms holding her close while she slept. She breathed in the comforting scent of the room and. though unbothered by the darkness, set to lighting several candles placed around the room until it was bathed in a soft glow that helped to fill some of the void.
A few days of this, and hopefully Krolock would be back. Until then, she mused, she could manage.