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Kel somehow managed to get the entire United States military on his ass. He wasn't sure how, but he did it. Perhaps it was his fetish for Orange Joe. He knew all of his friends classified Orange Joe as a crime against humanity. It violated the geneva convention in some way, he just knew it. Does he care? No. Will he keep drinking his war criminal sauce? Yes.
He heard the booming of gunshots and loud yelling. He's Kel. He doesn't give a shit. Somehow, he had been graced with anomalous properties. He can make anything canon. So, he proceeded to will an AK-74M into his hands, and came out of cover, aiming at one of the men searching for him. He pumped the man with a round to the head, watching him flop to the ground as he lost his life. Smirking, Kel would go back into cover once more. He knew the men would find him. But he knows of his abilities. The men have no fighting chance against him.
Hearing the frantic shouts, he takes a swig of his Orange Joe bottle, before coming out of cover to shoot at the men frantically searching for him. He showed no mercy to them. The men wanted blood, so Kel would give blood. Not his, but their blood. It's the only way to stop the manhunt. He knew what would happen if the men caught him. The mere idea of being tortured and experimented on frightened him, but no longer was he afraid of these merciless soldiers.
He heard the loud noise of someone shouting. Giving orders. Kel knew that the men were coming for him, so he gracefully waited for the rifles to be pointed at him. Footsteps approached his position at a rapid manner. Noticing someone aiming their rifle at him, he went into cover, and plugged his ears to prepare for the loud deafening boom. And there it was. The gunshot could definitely be heard from miles away.
Suddenly, rifles were all pointed at Kel. "Put the fucking gun down!" A man in military gear commanded. He'd hesitate at first, but put the gun down. He had a plan. A man reached for the AK-74M, but then Kel suddenly grabbed the gun, and pulled the trigger, firing a bullet straight into a man's shin. And then he felt bullets pierce his skin and flesh. The metal of the bullets were digging into his muscle tissue. He felt no pain despite what was happening. Any ordinary man would be dead or shrieking and groaning in pain. Not Kel.
"Why the fuck is he still sitting up straight?!" One of the soldiers inquired, completely and utterly confused. Kel didn't know why either. He took a swig of the Orange Joe, watching the men without masks and goggles' faces become one of disgust. Kel opened his mouth to say something. "No dick," a vine boom sound would be heard, causing a shockwave that knocked men around him onto the ground. He heard a snap of bone along with the sound of bodies hitting the dirt. "No balls," another vine boom sound effect was emitted from Kel. He heard more of the awful sound of the snapping of bones and screams of soldiers around him. He had to finish what he started. "And probably no butthole because this guy feeds on radiation," Kel would finish talking, and then the loudest vine boom of them all played. Men around him were scattered in all different directions from the sheer power of the shockwave, their bones and heads broken in.
The remaining men either crawled or ran away. Kel walked over to what looked like a high ranking military general's carcass that showed signs of blunt force trauma. He took off the neck gaiter, and poured Orange Joe onto the general's devoid of life face. "Stay hydrated."
