Chapter Text
When Sasuke was called back to the village from his mission, he hadn't imagined the reason could be so cruel.
"Sakura-chan..." The words could barely leave from Naruto's mouth.
Sasuke glared at him, and Naruto gulped audibly.
"Sakura what?" Sasuke snapped. Naruto shuffling nervously in his seat wasn't doing any good to his anxiety either.
Fuck! Should've gone to the house first or even to the hospital, instead of coming to this moron.
Naruto's brows furrowed more. He really didn't know how to say it.
"Just speak, Dobe!"
"Sakura-chan," he started again.
The tense silence that hung between them was cut off by Sasuke's 'Tch.'
Sasuke was about to leave —
"Sakura-chan has acute myeloid leukemia."
When he was called off from his mission for an emergency, it hadn’t even crossed his mind that could be the reason.
Naruto slumped more into his chair and rambled, "It's a type of cancer that affects blood cells."
"I fucking know that." Sasuke seethed before he started walking away from Naruto.
"I'm going to the hospital."
"She isn't in the hospital."
Sasuke stopped and whirled around at breakneck speed.
"She — she is — at home."
"What? Why hasn't she been admitted to the hospital?"
Sasuke walked towards Naruto, glaring at him dangerously now. Naruto could see his fist clenching; he was sure Sasuke was about to start throwing punches.
And he accepted that. He should be, he thought.
He should have noticed when Sakura had started looking pale. He should have noticed when she had struggled to finish a bowl of ramen while they bickered at Ichiraku. He should have noticed that when she had hit him with her chakra enhanced fists, that it didn't hurt much as it used to.
He should've noticed it, because he had promised Sasuke that he would look after Sakura when he wasn't around in the village.
Anger and regret bubbled more inside his gut, because he had only seen the smile she used to hide away all her pain.
But Sasuke didn't hit him. Naruto sighed, covering his face. "She was admitted."
"Will you spit it out, Dobe?" Sasuke yelled, slamming his fist on the desk.
"It happened when she fainted during a surgery after you left for the mission last year. But when this started happening more often, Shizune-san ran a couple of tests on her, and then it was confirmed."
Naruto wearily glanced towards Sasuke. He himself had to face the bitter truth before he could deliver it to Sasuke.
Naruto swallowed a sob. "She’s dying, Sasuke."
None of it made any sense. All he could feel was the sharp pain of loss. The feeling — losing the people he loved — was so familiar to him that his expression didn't even change.
"There has to be something. Where is The Godaime? Tell her to come back to the village and treat her."
Naruto ran his hand through his hair. He was barely holding himself up, and his bastard friend was ripping out all the details that he didn't want to face — that slapped the truth on his face that he had failed.
"Do you think I didn't call for Tsunade-obachan? She returned as soon —"
Sasuke grabbed him by the collar and pulled him out of his seat, "Then how is Sakura dying?"
Naruto didn't resist, but he didn’t respond either. He screwed his eyes shut; he realised he wasn't brave enough to see the agony inside Sasuke's mismatched eyes.
"Answer me, Naruto!"
The door behind them was kicked open. Naruto fought his way out of Sasuke’s grip and faced a displeased look from Shikamaru.
Shikamaru placed a bunch of papers on the desk, but he didn’t comment on the scene. He stopped in front of Sasuke on his way out.
"To answer your question, the advanced stage of the disease had already destroyed the normal production of her blood cells. Unfortunately, it was too late when the disease was diagnosed, and Tsunade-sama did all she could. Everyone of us tried hard to gather resources Tsunade-sama asked for. We did our best, Sasuke."
Everyone of us…
We did our best…
And what did I fucking do?
Sasuke was staring at the floor. He missed the sad smile on Shikamaru's face before he spoke again, "When nothing more could be done, Sakura said she wanted to spend the rest of her days in the house she shared with you."
The anger in Sasuke’s face dissipated, and he looked hurt now. After he and Sakura married, they bought a house together, and he had left for a mission barely a month after that. The thought that she had wanted him to be around her so much that she was awaiting her death in the house they had dreamt of living in together hurt more than he could describe.
"Why didn't you tell me earlier? Why haven't you called me back earlier? " He redirected his anger towards Naruto. "Why didn't Sak—?" He wanted to know why she hadn't told him anything in her letters, but he choked on her name.
"Sakura-chan doesn't want to call you off from your mission. Believe me, I tried convincing her, but you know how stubborn she is."
Sasuke scoffed at his words.
"I'm sorry, Sasuke." Naruto didn't know what else to say.
But neither did Sasuke. He walked away instead, gritting his teeth and trying to bear the searing pain.
When he reached his house, it was already evening. The hallway was dark, the rooms barren, and the furniture dusty. He set his sandals beside another pair lying on the floor. He also heard a nurse was staying alongside Sakura because she was too weak to walk by herself now.
The thought made him guild-ridden. He had married her — he loved her. How could he do this to her?
He creaked open the door of the bedroom and found Sakura on her bed, every inch of her features twisted in pain.
The nurse abruptly stood up and the book that she was reading fell from her hand.
This stirred Sakura out of her slumber. When she opened her eyes, she saw Sasuke. She smiled weakly, struggling to get up to greet him, "Welcome home, Anata."
Anata. He had missed hearing it. Maybe it was the last time he would hear it.
Sasuke didn't move from his position. His eyes followed the nurse as she helped Sakura to sit up.
"Kiyoko-san, you don't have to stay tonight. You see, my husband is back, so it will be okay if you take a leave."
Husband. The word resonated in his ear while he observed her. Her complexion was paler, her green eyes sunken and dull, rosy lips chapped, her body weak and bony. He couldn't match the image of Sakura he had kissed goodbye a year ago with her present form.
"Your daughter had asked me to teach her some medical ninjutsu before her chunin exams. Tell her I'm sorry that I couldn't."
Sakura was still smiling, and the nurse burst into tears, "Oh, Sakura-san. Don't worry about it. Take care of yourself, please."
Sakura nodded meekly as the nurse wiped away her tears, her other hand squeezing Sakura's palm.
A daughter. He remembered Sakura telling him that she had wanted a daughter after he had made love to her the night before he left for the mission. He had flicked on her forehead and had told her next time.
The nurse took her leave, leaving them both alone. Sasuke still didn't move an inch. He was too afraid and too ashamed to confront her. When she had needed him the most, he had gone off to chase ghosts.
He had left her alone, like he always had.
"Did Naruto tell you?"
Sasuke nodded, his head hanging low.
Sakura's heart clenched to see him like that, but she joked, "I'm going to beat that idiot."
This lifted Sasuke's lips upwards into a faint smirk, and Sakura was relieved to see that. Sakura waved her hand, gesturing to him to come closer.
After Sakura talked about everything, he went to take a shower. She dozed off while she was talking, and she was still sleeping, breathing slowly.
He quietly got inside the covers and stared at her back — the uchiwa sewn on her cream coloured shirt.
He wrapped his arm around her torso, taking in her scent. He remembered he also had promised her that he would take her with him the next time he returned.
He inhaled sharply, realizing the future he had found strength to dream of again was crumbling. And yet again, he could do nothing.
If I hadn't left this time too, would things have been different?
"Will you stay?"
Sakura's words ground him to reality, as she intertwined her cold trembling fingers with his that were resting on her stomach.
"Aah."
Sakura smiled softly, clutching his palm and bringing it to rest on her chest.
Sasuke felt her heart beating meekly, and he held her like that until it stopped. Sasuke rested his forehead on her lifeless shoulder, and he cried like the seven-year-old version of himself had cried when his family had died.