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Schlatt could be a bit cold at times. He didn’t talk much, unless it was for a bit, and whenever he did speak, he avoided talk of feelings like the plague. He was aloof, emotionally unavailable, and for the most part, quiet.
He talked to them, sure. Never about personal things or how life is, but casual conversation, jokes, or talk of classes were commonplace in their conversations. It was early in their junior year, it was easy to just talk about classes.
Schlatt could tell, though, that the idle chit chat and half-baked conversations were not enough for his friends. He could feel the growing distance. Or perhaps that was him. He was trying to withdraw, yes, but not for any fault of theirs. He just… he couldn’t talk to them. Not really. All he would do is bring down the mood, and he didn’t want them to worry.
Life was… life was life. At it’s best, it was when he was with his friends, and it was at its worst just about every time after. Plagued with bullies who seemed to think it was immense fun to torment him, shove him into the sides of lockers, trip him, steal his things.
At home, there was no reprieve. His parents never wanted children, so the fact that he was born was naturally his fault. Schlatt’s mother is a stern woman, her hair pinned back, not a hair out of place. Very rigid and unyielding in her manner, preferring to be more verbal with him than his father, though never hesitates to slap him here or there sometimes when his father isn’t around. His father is a large, broad-shouldered man who looks like he could toss him twenty feet if he wanted to. He was not at all the slightest bit afraid to lay Schlatt a new one if he so much as even set foot three feet away from any line they’ve set.
True, life was better with his friends, but it was not perfect. He and one of his friends did not get along well. They tried to put aside their differences for their friends, but sometimes their distaste for each other shone through. Carson had a bit of an issue with jealousy, you see. He had known their friends for quite some time before Schlatt came along, and then when he did, suddenly he wasn’t the funny one anymore, Schlatt was. He wasn’t even trying to be funny, though, he was just hanging out with his friends.
Carson and Schlatt eventually settled that they’d agree to disagree, to hate each other quietly, not bring the matter to their friends, not wishing to rip apart the group, or make them choose either one of them. They didn’t want to be the one not chosen.
It was early September, school had only recently started up for them in their junior year, and later this week Schlatt was to turn seventeen. He told his friends this on the Monday before his birthday, though he wasn’t sure if anyone paid any attention, as he received no acknowledgement but a few hums. Carson nodded, though, so that was at least something. He had said it loud enough to be heard. It was Carson, though, so did it really count? The others were all absorbed in what they were doing. That was okay.
A few days later, it was the day before his birthday, and they were all piled in the back of one of their parent’s cars. Schlatt was driving. The others were singing and laughing along to some song on the radio. Schlatt couldn’t concentrate on the song.
He wasn’t looking forward to his birthday. It was one day above all else that his parents looked to make his life hell, simply because he didn’t choose to exist.
He was trying to mentally prepare himself for that night and the next day, but he just… he didn’t wanna face it. He wanted to stay here, with his friends, he wanted to tell them, so bad, about what was going on in his life. But he wouldn’t. It would just complicate things. If they were slipping away from him that would be alright. He could slip away unnoticed, pass on into oblivion alone. He didn’t need people to miss him.
His hands gripped the wheel as he stared out the front of the car, feeling very small. He knew what would happen when he got home.
Noah sat in the passenger's seat of the car. He had been singing along, but stopped when he looked over at their driver. Schlatt wasn’t singing along, and looked upset about something. His nose was red and his eyes looked glassy. Noah would ask him about later. Schlatt wasn’t the type to openly speak of his feelings.
He pulled him aside later that night, when they’re all about to leave.
Schlatt tries to play it off, just a bad day, bad week… but Noah sees right through him. There’s more than meets the eye there, more than Schlatt has ever let on.
“Noah, I’m fine. Just been a long day, and it’s not ending anytime soon. I’m just… mentally preparing…”
"For what?"
“Just… stuff, man. Family’s coming into town.” A boldfaced lie, but Noah wouldn’t know any better. It was no secret that Schlatt was an introvert, that would be believable that it needed mental preparation.
“Oh. You wanna stay with one of us?” Oh how he did. He really did. But that might reveal more than he wanted to let on, and he wasn’t ready for that pity yet.
“No. Thank you, but no. I gotta… I have to deal with this on my own.”
“You sure? You don’t have to. You looked upset in the car, it’s okay to talk to us, man.”
“I wish it was. But I can’t. I’m sorry. I’m gonna go ahead and dip, gotta get home. See you at school tomorrow.” Noah looked unsettled by his words. Schlatt turned to walk to his car. Noah stopped him, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Schlatt..? Is everything alright at home?” he asked, brows narrowing. Schlatt turned his head slightly, his face dark and unreadable.
“I gotta get home,” he muttered, shrugging Noah off. Noah stood frozen in place, watching Schlatt leave. The latter left, driving away.
Noah had a bad feeling. He wanted to follow Schlatt, make sure everything was okay, but he decided against it. Schlatt was far enough away by now, and he didn't know where he lived.
Come the next morning, Noah came to regret that decision. Schlatt walked into school with a bit of a limp, very obviously trying to hide how bad it really was by laughing it off and saying he tripped in the parking lot.
The others bought it, but Noah had reason for suspicion. Schlatt’s lack of an answer to Noah’s question the night before was reason enough to not believe everything Schlatt says. People lie a lot when they have something to hide. Not to mention the way Schlatt kept avoiding eye contact with him.
Noah watches him that day, or at least when they're in the same room together, which wasn’t often. They all eat together, though, and so Noah could keep an eye on him then.
Connor, one of Schlatt’s classmates, nervously came up to their table that day, tapped Schlatt on the shoulder and wished him a happy birthday. Schlatt looked at him, blinked, and then said ‘thank you’ in the most genuine voice Noah had ever heard him use. After Connor left, Ted scoffed.
“You didn’t have to say thank you, you know. You could have told him,” Ted said.
“Told him what?” Schlatt asked, confused. Carson rolled his eyes.
“That he got the wrong day, wrong guy,” Ted continued.
“But… It is my birthday.”
“Whaaat? Bullshit. You’re pulling my leg.”
“I'm not. I told you on Monday.”
“No you didn’t!”
“He did,” Carson said. “You guys just weren’t paying attention.”
Now that was somewhat… unsurprising. Schlatt tended to not repeat himself, so if they weren’t listening, he wouldn’t repeat himself.
“Did we acknowledge you?” Cooper asked. Schlatt nodded.
“Huh. I thought you guys knew, so I didn’t say anything. I just assumed we weren’t doing anything for it,” Carson shrugged. He and Schlatt seemed to be at odds a lot. They didn’t seem to like each other much.
The bell rang and they all got up to go back to their classes. Schlatt, as he got up, looked like he was in pain, holding himself like he was in pain. Then Noah realized how much he held himself like that. A lot.
“Hey Schlatt, wait up,” Noah said. Schlatt lagged behind the crowd. “Your leg… did something happen?”
“Yeah. I tripped.”
“Schlatt.”
“Noah.”
“Why won't you tell me? I know something is up!”
“Because I can’t! I tripped in the parking lot, and that is all, asshole ,” Schlatt hissed, before storming off to his class.
This was the one class that he and the guys had all together, save for Schlatt. The teacher didn’t give two shits, so Noah was free to bring this up to the group.
“… I gotta drop something on you, ok? Don’t interrogate him about it, he won’t talk,” Noah whispered.
“Okay? What are you talking about?” Charlie asked.
“I think Schlatt is being abused at home…”
“What??”
“I mean think about it. He never talks about home, he never talks about any of his feelings or anything… It makes sense. I don’t like it, but it makes sense.”
“Yeah. Let’s talk to him after class.”
“No, he won’t talk if we interrogate him!”
And then after class of course they immediately scouted Schlatt out and interrogated him, despite Noah’s best attempt to make them not do that. Schlatt looked confused, then nervous, then betrayed, as he glared briefly at Noah for telling them. And then he just looked overwhelmed.
They asked question after question, not giving Schlatt enough time to breathe, much less answer them. His eyes flitted around nervously, grasping at smoke for an answer or even a word to make them stop.
Then, ironically, Carson’s voice rang out above the others, signalling for Schlatt to follow him. As much as they didn’t seem to get along, Schlatt looked relieved as he pushed his way past his friends to follow Carson. As much as Noah agreed that Schlatt needed a breather, he had a bad feeling.
Schlatt was, to put it lightly, overwhelmed. It felt like he was drowning in a cacophony of his friends’ voices, all seeming to say one thing, just over and over again in different phrasing. Noah had jumped to a conclusion and told the others, as he does. But no matter how accurate his leap may have been, there were more subtle ways of getting questions answered. This was just too much, too much. He felt light-headed, unable to get a good breath as he tried to answer even one question, but then another came and stole his focus away. Then, like a knight in untrustworthy armor, Carson of all people was calling his name, pulling him away from the group.
“You look overwhelmed. Here, I know a good place to get some air,” Carson said. Despite how much they hated each other, Schlatt was ever so grateful for Carson at this moment.
They ended up on the roof of the school. Carson was right, this was a good place to get some fresh air. After a minute or two, Carson turned to him.
“So are you?” he asked, as if Schlatt knew what he was talking about.
“Am I what?”
“Getting mistreated at home.”
“Oh. It’s really… nobody’s business… It’s manageable.”
“You wanna know what I’d do if I were you?”
“What’s that?”
“I’d kill myself.”
Oh. So that’s why Carson brought them up here. Still, it wasn’t like Schlatt hadn’t ever thought about it. Of course he had. It always either seemed too easy or too unobtainable. With his shit luck, he’d probably not even die. Schlatt sighed, and glanced over the edge. His stomach dropped. That was a long way down. He’d never been great with heights.
“I mean face it, Schlatt. As much as we don’t get along, at least I don’t pretend to like you like the others do. What do you really have to live for? Your parents don’t love you if they’re abusing you at home, my friends don’t care about you, not really, and you’ve done a fine job of making sure they don't talk to you much. You don’t want anyone to miss you, fine! They won’t! And I mean come on, how poetic would it be to die on your birthday?”
“Yeah… I guess…” Schlatt murmured. Carson was right. No one would care. Schlatt himself had done a decent job making sure of that. He stepped closer to the edge.
Down below, Schlatt heard the doors to the school open. His friends filed out of the school, looking around. They were looking for him.
They looked around. Travis glanced up, saw him briefly, and did a double-take.
Achilles, Achilles, Achilles, come down
Won't you get up off, get up off the roof?
You're scaring us and all of us, some of us love you
Achilles, it's not much but there's proof
You crazy-assed cosmonaut, remember your virtue
Redemption lies plainly in truth
Just humour us, Achilles, Achilles, come down
Won't you get up off, get up off the roof?
“Schlatt! Come down, get away from there!” he called. The others whipped around, looking up.
“Schlatt, please come down, you’re scaring us!” Cooper shouted.
“You don’t have to do this, Schlatt, we care about you! It might not seem like much, but there’s proof!” Charlie said. Carson chuckles behind him.
“Look at them. Still lying, trying to help your sorry ass just to keep you miserable for longer,” he muttered.
“Just humor us, Schlatt! Please come down! Won’t you get up off the roof?”
Carson mutters things behind him, and Schlatt looks down at the edge. He wasn’t gonna do this, was he? Why shouldn’t he, though? Today was the day that his parents hated him most of all, he could avoid it… all of it.
Achilles, Achilles, Achilles, come down
Won't you get up off, get up off the roof?
You're scaring us and all of us, some of us love you
Achilles, it's not much but there's proof
You crazy-assed cosmonaut, remember your virtue
Redemption lies plainly in truth
Just humour us, Achilles, Achilles, come down
Won't you get up off, get up off the roof?
Loathe the way they light candles in Rome
But love the sweet air of the votives
Hurt and grieve but don't suffer alone
Engage with the pain as a motive
Today of all days, see
How the most dangerous thing is to love
How you will heal and you'll rise above
“Schlatt, come down, you’re not weightless, you can’t fly!” Hah. He wasn’t trying to. Though he remembered that conversation, about if they could choose a power, he’d said he’d wanna fly, so that he could get addicted to the feeling of falling. It was a nice callback, though rather inopportune at the moment. “You gotta soldier on, Schlatt! You hurt and grieve, but you don't have to suffer alone! Today, of all days!”
He knew they were referring to his birthday. Indeed, today of all days. Today was the worst day of every year for him. Carson was right, it would be ironic that today he should die. There was a beautiful irony there that did not go missed by Schlatt.
Carson still muttered things behind him, but as his friends got more insistent, he grew louder, revealing himself to them, consequences be damned.
Achilles, Achilles, Achilles, jump now
You are absent of cause or excuse
So self-indulgent and self-referential
No audience could ever want you
You crave the applause yet hate the attention
Then miss it, your act is a ruse
It is empty, Achilles, so end it all now
It's a pointless resistance for you
“Jump now, Schlatt, quit pussying out! You have no cause to live, nor excuse to stall dying! You’re so fucking selfish, self-indulgent. They don’t really want you, no audience would! You crave their approval yet hate attention, you’re such a ruse. End it now, Schlatt. Pointless to resist. You know you want to jump.”
… Did he?
Achilles, Achilles, just put down the bottle
Don't listen to what you've consumed
It's chaos, confusion and wholly unworthy
Of feeding and it's wholly untrue
You may feel no purpose nor a point for existing
It's all just conjecture and gloom
And there may not be meaning, so find one and seize it
Do not waste yourself on this roof
Hear those bells ring deep in the soul
Chiming away for a moment
Feel your breath course frankly below
And see life as a worthy opponent
His friends shouted at him not to listen to Carson, how he was poisoning his mind. They told him that if he thinks his life without meaning, then he should find one of his own, please, get down. Don’t die here, they begged. He felt Carson step closer to him, now visible from the ground. Schlatt inched back away from the edge a bit, still lost for words. It felt like there was a devil and an angel on each shoulder, whispering things in his ear. Each demanding his attention, while he stood frozen over a not entirely metaphorical abyss. Words began to blend together, he couldn't tell who was speaking anymore.
“It’s not worth it, Schlatt, don’t listen to that!”
“Be real, Schlatt. Just jump, you dense motherfucker.”
“You’re worth more, Schlatt!”
“No more than a rat.”
“So much more than a rat.”
“You wanted my opinion, you have it.”
“No one asked for your opinion!”
“You asked for my counsel, I gave you my thoughts.”
“No one asked for your thoughts.”
“Just jump, Schlatt. Be done with this.”
“Can you hear me, Schlatt?” seemingly all of them asked at once. “I’m talking to you!”
Then the voices cleared, and he could distinguish who was speaking again. Whatever kept him hesitating cleared, and he finally moved.
He stepped back, away from the edge, a breath he hadn’t known he was holding escaping him. His friends visibly relaxed, and it looked like a thousand pounds of stress collectively lifted from the lot of them.
Carson snarled behind him.
“I can't. I can’t do it,” Schlatt muttered. Carson stepped up behind him.
“Fine.” Schlatt looked slightly behind him to meet Carson’s eyes. “I’ll do it for you.”
Schlatt’s eyes widened in alarm as he felt a hard shove to his back. He flailed, arms gripping the ones that pushed him, but it was too late. He was already too off-balance to pull himself up. The other lost his footing, losing balance as well. Schlatt tumbled over the edge, and dragged Carson with him.
To say that talking Schlatt down from the edge was hard was an understatement. Carson was up there, whispering poisoned words into his mind, creating doubt in Schlatt’s mind. He’d taken advantage of Schlatt’s overwhelmed state, pulled him away from the others in a shroud of deceited helpfulness, when really he just took him up here to make him kill himself.
It was no secret that Carson and Schlatt didn’t get along well. Carson was too much of a jealous type to let the new person in the friend group be accepted by all six of them. Schlatt had done fine with just the five of them, not including Carson. He and Carson had come to a sort of agreement, agreeing to just not mention it around the others and ‘keep it to the dms’.
They should have known Carson was up to no good, but as soon as push came to shove, both of their friends were falling over the edge.
It happened in a millisecond, but Carson hit the ground first, and Schlatt just after. The others were stunned into silence, staring at the two boys on the ground, the growing pool of blood on the sidewalk. Carson had landed on the concrete, while Schlatt had managed the grass just beside it. Both of them lay still.
As soon as one of the five left standing was able to move, to walk over with shaking limbs, they heard a groan from one of those on the ground. Their bodies unfroze and they rushed over to see if their friends had survived.
“Oh, fuuuuck. That hurt…” Schlatt groaned. He hadn’t yet opened his eyes, but pain was still visible on his face.
“ Holy fuck, thank God - Schlatt, can you hear us?” Charlie asked, appearing where Schlatt could see him if he’d open his eyes. Ted started calling 911, they needed medical help.
“Char..lie? Be real with me. Am I dead?” Schlatt asked, eyes opening a crack. His eyes were unfocused, hazed over with pain.
“No, no, you’re alive!”
“Oh. That's good, I guess.” He tried to sit up, but Charlie and Noah both gently pushed him back down. “I cant feel my leg…” he mutters softly. Noah looked over at Schlatt’s leg. His ankle looked to be broken.
“Can you feel everything else?”
“I guess… wait, Carson fell too, is he, is he okay?”
“Schlatt, save your strength, there's an ambulance coming, okay?” Noah said. No, Carson wasn’t okay. One look back at him could confirm that, but they had to help someone they could still help before worrying about that. Noah and Ted and Charlie all tried to help, but it was understandable that Travis couldn’t right then, Cooper tugging him over to the side and letting him cry into his shoulder.
“Is he okay?” Schlatt repeated, not letting it go. Noah thought it was ironic that Schlatt would still care after he was literally pushed off a roof by him. But he knew his friend. He would only feel worse if he knew now that he had lived and the other had not. They all remained silent for a moment, and Schlatt took their silence as his answer. “I'm sorry…”
Noah and Charlie looked away. He wasn’t apologizing for not dying, they knew. He knew they cared about Carson. It would be hard to get over, the death of their friend. Not to mention, seeing him like that before the end, so… villainous, trying to make one of their other friends kill himself… it wasn’t a good last image. Charlie was blinking back tears by the time Schlatt spoke again.
“I- I really wasn’t gonna jump, I didn’t wanna…” he trailed off.
“Didn’t wanna what?”
“Go out that way… I don’t like heights, and it’s too uncertain. You probably don’t want to talk about that though…”
“But hey, you’re alive, that counts for something, right?”
“I guess… my parents won’t be happy when they find out I’m here, though…”
“I don’t think anyone’s parents would… not in this context.”
“Hey Noah?”
“Yeah?”
“You were right.. I just didn’t wanna… bother you guys…” Schlatt looked away. The guys felt bad. They’d known him for a long time. He’d never once mentioned anything about his home life or how he was really feeling, just dealt with it alone, slowly pushing himself towards the edge.
Carson wouldn’t have tried to risk that if there wasn’t already some sort of desire of Schlatt’s already, to unalive himself.
They felt bad for not noticing.
For claiming they cared and then letting him hide away, hurt by himself.
Schlatt is in pain, he didn’t want to jump, or fall, or whatever the fuck happened, that wasn’t how he wanted to go. He wanted to go peacefully, to something he wasn’t afraid of, like a gun or an overdose… Not falling. He hated heights, always got queasy whenever he stood near an edge. He doesn’t even really know what happened, there was just a rush of air and then pain.
His mind was racing. Was he dead? He couldn’t breathe for a second. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t- he inhaled sharply, and everything hurt. His leg numbed quickly, he didn’t think that was a good sign. He groaned, and someone rushed to his side.
They talked for a little bit, Schlatt mostly trying to keep the conversation going so he didn’t pass out and they didn’t leave him. He didn’t wanna be alone right now. Couldn’t be sure he wasn’t still dying.
Eventually, though, everything went black again, with the last thing he heard was sirens, and someone calling his name.
He woke up in the hospital. Everything was blurry and way too bright to keep his eyes open, but the sounds and smells were there, invading his perception of everything around him. Saline and just a little bit of bleach, and a repetitive beeping noise that was starting to get on his nerves. He hadn’t even been awake that long.
A doctor came in, or was that a nurse? Regardless, they asked how he was doing, what he could remember, what he could feel, if he knew what day it was.
“I don’t- can you turn down the lights..?” He asked. The doctor? nurse? chuckled, and turned on a lamp beside him before turning off the main lights. He blinked his eyes open. That was a lot better.
“Now then. What do you remember? Do you remember what day it was that you fell?”
“Yeah, it was… it was my birthday. The tenth. How long ‘ave I been out?”
“Not long. It’s still the tenth. What do you remember, besides the date?”
“I was… on a roof. With a friend of my friends.”
“Not your friend?”
“Not really, but we knew each other well… he pushed me, I grabbed his arm. We both fell, I think. Did he…?”
“No. He passed away.”
“Oh. I think I knew that. My, my friends, are they okay? They saw the whole… everything…”
“They’re in the hall.”
“Can I talk to them?”
“In a moment.” The nurse, he decided it was, asked him a few more questions, told him a few things, how his leg was in a cast, what pain meds he was on, how to call a nurse or doctor if he needed anything, and then they left the room. His friends filed in after, somber looking but glad to see him.
“I’m sorry about Carson… I didn’t mean to grab him, it was just-”
“Reflex. Schlatt, it’s alright. We’re glad you’re okay,” Ted said, coming closer to pat Schlatt’s arm.
“Still, I’m sorry.”
“It was his fault. Not yours. He tried to kill you. You don’t have to apologize.”
“Oh I wasn’t accepting blame, I was expressing empathy,” Schlatt nodded slightly, the words coming out before he could stop them. The guys looked stunned, before Cooper snorted a little bit, and started chuckling. The others soon fell in as well, despite themselves. Schlatt looked around. What?
“You’re so high right now, aren’t you?”
“What?” he complained. “I didn’t have a choice!”
“Oh my god, holy shit, it’s not even that funny, why are we laughing?”
They calmed down a bit, and the mood turned more serious.
“Man, my parents are not gonna be happy when they find out I’m here. They’re probably on their way…”
“You can stay with one of us once you get discharged, if you want.”
“No, I wouldn’t want to intrude.” Just as Charlie opened his mouth to say something like he wouldn’t be intruding, the nurse from before poked her head in.
“Schlatt? Your parents are here, they’d like to see you.”
“Okay,” he said, loud enough for the nurse to hear, then muttered, “that’s a first…”
“You want us to leave the room for a sec?” Ted asked. Schlatt nodded, and his parents came in. as much as he would have appreciated the emotional support, he didn’t want them getting caught up in an argument. There’s been enough pain today.
Ted led his friends out the door, leaving Schlatt alone with his parents.
“This fucking sucks. Why won’t he let us help him?” Noah muttered, toeing the floor with his boot.
“If I had to guess, it’s because he’s smart, and knows we’ll get wrapped up in something we don’t need to be in,” Travis offered. “He probably doesn’t wanna see us get hurt.”
“I still don’t like it.”
“Nobodys asking you to like it.”
It was quiet in the hall for several minutes, before they could hear raised voices through the wall. Ted moved to barge in there, but several nurses slipped past him.
“Sir, Ma’am, we’re going to have to ask you to leave,” they said. Grumbling, Schlatt’s parents left, shooting a glare at Ted and his friends as they walked out. The nurses left, and they all walked back in. Schlatt looked a bit shaken, but otherwise alright.
“How did the nurses know to come?” Cooper wondered aloud. Schlatt held up the call button, waving it a bit. “Oh. What did your parents say? Can I ask?”
“They said… They said that I was gonna regret not dying from the fall when I got home.”
“Okay, that’s it. You’re staying with one of us for a while. You can even couch hop if you want, stay with someone different every few nights. But you aren’t going back with them if they’re gonna treat you like this,” Ted said, rather finally. Schlatt tried to protest, but Ted shushed him. “Bup-bup-bup, no. You aren’t gonna intrude, you aren’t gonna be a burden, nothing like that. Okay?”
“Okay. Thank you.” Schlatt gave a slight smile.
His friends made sure he wasn’t ever lonely for too long, something Schlatt was very grateful for, even if they hadn’t ever really had a real conversation outside of classes before. At a few points, Connor even stopped by and stayed with him for a bit. At one point, Connor was leaving as Travis and Cooper were coming in, and Cooper watched him leave.
“I think that guy likes you,” he said, chuckling a bit. Schlatt felt heat rise to his face slightly. Travis grinned.
“Aww, you like him too? That’s great, you should tell him!” he encouraged.
“Hell no,” Schlatt said, shaking his head. Cooper laughed at him.
“You’d better, or else we’re gonna play matchmaker!”
“Shut the fuck up and go find me snacks.”
When Schlatt was released a few days later, the hospital staff gave him a pair of crutches, and his other belongings, and walked him outside. Charlie was waiting beside his car, and came over and helped him get in.
“Is there gonna be a funeral?” Schlatt asked that night.
“Oh. Yeah. It’s tomorrow. We weren’t gonna make you go,” Charlie said.
“I’ll go. I know we didn’t get along much, and he tried to… well… But I still had a good time with him, on occasion. I wouldn’t have wished that on him.”
“Okay. Thank you.”
“Yeah.”
They went, the next day, to the funeral. It was a nice funeral, only a few close friends and family. Carson’s parents approached him after the service.
“You must be the boy Carson tried to push. I’d like to apologize for my son’s behavior. I can’t believe he’d do something like this,” Carson’s father said. “Frankly I’m surprised you’re here.”
“Sir… your son wasn’t a bad person. He had… a few mental issues going on, and I think one of them involved an issue with jealousy? And I was the new guy…”
“Yes, he’s had issues with jealousy in the past.”
“But he was otherwise a good kid, and I wouldn’t have wished that on him. I’m so sorry,” Schlatt said. Carson’s parents had already been grieving, but his mother teared up again, moved forward, and lightly hugged him. He wasn’t expecting that.
“You didn’t have to say that, but thank you. Thank you so much.”
And then they left, or at least went to go talk to someone else. Noah came up behind him and patted his shoulder.
“That was a good thing to do. Even if you didn’t mean it, it helped them.”
“Yeah. What should I do now? Like… life-wise. I have no idea, I didn’t think I’d make it this far.” Noah thought for a second.
Throw yourself into the unknown
With pace and a fury defiant
Clothe yourself with beauty untold
And see life as a means to a triumph.
Today, of all days, see
How the most dangerous thing is to love
How you will heal and you’ll rise above
Crowned by an overture bold and beyond
Ah, it’s more courageous to overcome.
“Try something new. Try it with everything you’ve got. Find something you’re passionate about, try and see life as a means to a triumph.”
“Yeah?”
“Cooper and Travis tell me you like that Connor boy. Why don’t you give him a shot? It can be pretty healing to find someone to love, who really loves you back.”
“You think so?”
“Yeah. I do.”
“Thank you.”