Chapter Text
[London, December 10th]
Snowy streets, Christmas lights illuminated the way, passersby bundled up in hats and scarves, the gentle toll of a bell in the distance, that was what Helen missed most about Christmas in London. There was nothing quite like the holidays in her home city. And no Christmas before would ever top the Christmas she was having this year.
Growing up in London was filled with history lessons everywhere a young Helen Sharpe could look. The city was filled to the brim with history and beautiful architecture in the simplest terms. Helen remembers the first time she saw the London Eye, she was a young teen and her Auntie had taken her and it had been an amazing experience. As much as that memory had always been outlined in her mind, the feelings of her city during the holidays always left her heart filled with a warm sensation she desperately longed for each year.
Helen can’t help but admit, as she walks down the bustling city streets from the clinic to her and Max’s flat, that she’s one really lucky woman. How often does a guy like Max come around a woman like her? How did she end up with him?
Destiny is something she always believed in. But after a lifetime full of heartbreak, destiny seemed to be playing with everyone but her.
Helen smiles to herself as she walks past a large ice skating rink. She makes a note to herself to take Max and Luna there on her off day. Silently she knows it’s because she’s almost certain she’s better at skating than he is, but it’s also something most families do during Christmas.
Yes , families. She’s a part of a family now. And arguably that’s more earth shattering than becoming a medical director and moving back to London.
The warm sensation in her chest always finds its way to the surface whenever her thoughts wander to Max and Luna. The only word she can use to describe it is lucky . She’s really lucky.
Helen turns the key into the front door of their flat and is met with the force of a tiny body, “Mum!” Luna exclaims as she throws her small arms around Helen, though Helen isn’t even in the house yet.
Helen laughs at the little girl’s antics, “hi munchkin.” She says as she takes a small step, but one far enough in that she can close the front door and keep the freezing air out of their cozy flat.
Luna jumps up and down, doing some dance Helen assumes she learned in preschool. “That’s a very good dance, Lu.” Helen comments as she takes off her hat, scarf, and warm jacket, placing them on the rack that she’d finally got Max to actually put his coat on instead of on the back of a random piece of furniture.
Helen hears a crash come from the kitchen area of the flat, and some light cursing, and out comes a very disheveled Max. “Helen, you’re home!” Max exclaims, with the same expression Luna had on her face when she’d unlocked the door.
Max takes a couple steps to meet her, and press a gently welcome kiss on her lips. “How was your day, Medical Director Sharpe?” He asks with a lightly joking tone.
Helen smiles as she looks into his eyes, “it was good, productive. I’ve got some candidates coming in for a couple department head positions.” It had been a top priority to hire some fresh blood, so Helen was more than satisfied to have that on the books. “What did you and Luna get into today?”
Max looks down at Luna and swings down to pick her up. “I helped revise this research article on the after effects of COVID for an old friend from med school, while Luna here got in trouble at preschool.” He says.
Helen’s face immediately frowns, “what did she do?” She says to Max and then looks at Luna, “what did you do, munchkin?”
Luna buries her head in Max’s shoulder as Max sighs and flips through her blonde tussles to find a piece that had been stained red.
“What?” Helen gasps. “She took a marker to her hair? Don’t they tell the kids not to do that?” She states.
Max laughs, “she said, and I quote, ‘I want pink hair like my mum!’” Max says as Luna turns back around to nod in agreement.
Helen looks at Luna. A week ago she’d been at her old friend’s salon getting her hair done when her friend Sasha had convinced her to get a couple locks braided with a pretty, reddish pink color. The second she’d gone home, Luna had been obsessed with Helen’s ‘bwutiful hair’.
“Lu, you know you can’t color your hair with a marker,” Helen says as she looks at Luna. “Promise not to do it again?” She bargains.
Luna nods, “pwomise.” she replies as Max sits her back down on the carpet and lets her run to her toy stack in the corner of the room.
Max looks back at Helen, “you shouldn’t be mad at her, it’ll come out once we put her in the bath tonight.” He states simply.
“I know.” Helen nods, “I just don’t want to be a bad influence on her.” She says, it may sound naive but it’s true.
Max scoffs at her remark, “you’re her mum now. She’s gonna want to be just like you. Why else would she have gotten into your makeup, or been asking for high heels non-stop?” Max reasons. “She’s never lived with a female, and she’s learning about all these new things. Luna’s just curious.”
Helen nods as her eyes venture to the little girl playing in the corner. “That makes sense.” Helen rationalizes logically. “I guess this is what having a daughter is like then.”
Max wraps his arm around her shoulder, “it is.”
Helen looks up at him because her mind wandered back to the banging sound she heard when she’d walked in. “What were you doing before I got home?” She asks in an accusing tone.
Max’s face turns into an ‘oh!’ expression. “Here, come see.” He says as he grabs her hand and pulls her past their entryway and into the kitchen area of their flat. It was a small flat for a family of three, but it was cozy and full of love.
Helen’s face lights up when her eyes land on what Max must have spent all day putting together. It was a very large Christmas tree, full of ornaments and lights. “You did all this by yourself?” She asks as her hands move to inspect the plant now in her sitting room.
Max smiles proudly, “with a little help from Luna.” He states.
Helen looks on to inspect the bright new tree filling her living area. It’s smaller than the average tree, but it fits their cozy living area. She laughs to herself at the ornament placement though, Max might not be the best at placing the decorations evenly throughout the tree.
“You did good, babe.” Helen says with a smile back at Max. “When did you buy this?”
“Earlier today, I was at the store when you called me during your lunch break,” Max explains. It had taken a lot for him not to spill the secret.
Helen lays her head on his chest, which has quickly become one of her favorite spots, “I love it. And I love you .”
Max leans down and presses a kiss on her forehead, “I have one more thing for you.” He says as she stands straight up and looks at him, “Luna, come here baby girl, I’ve got a surprise.” He calls as the pitter patter of Luna’s little feet wound down the hall.
Helen smiles when Luna approaches with a big grin on her face. “Surprise?” The little girl asks.
Max nods and pulls out three stockings from a bag. He hands a pink one to Luna, a blue one to Helen, and an orange one for himself.
Helen looks down to inspect the large sock and is at a loss for words when she reads the name on it, ‘Mum’. She looks at Max’s that says ‘Dada’ and Luna’s that has ‘Luna’ on it. She stands in complete emotion for a second, trying not to cry happy tears.
“How about we put them up?” Max proposes as Luna nods and runs to their very small fireplace. It was the selling point of their flat. The fireplace just seemed to make the place so much more homey, and that was all they needed to assent to move there.
Helen nods, suppressing back a few joyful tears as she hands her stocking to Max.
“There we go,” Max exclaims as he hooks the three, large sock on the mantle while Luna claps. “Can you read the names, Luna?” He asks.
Max points towards his, “Dada!” She giggles. He points to hers, “Luna!” Luna says with a little spin. “And this one?” Max asks as he points out Helen’s, “Mum!” Luna says as she smiles and waves brightly at Helen.
Max sees Helen’s watery eyes, “go give Mum a hug,” he says to Luna.
Luna charges towards Helen, hair blowing behind her, Helen bends down with practiced ease to scoop up the little girl. Helen holds Luna against her chest, taking in the sweet scent of her hair. “I love you, munchkin. Merry Christmas.” Helen says softly to Luna.
Luna gives her a wet kiss on the cheek, “Merry Christmas, Mum. Santa says you're on the nice list.” Luna replies with a grin.
Helen looks down at Luna with a little laugh, “I’m on the nice list, huh? What about Dada?” She asks with a silly grin.
Luna looks at Max slyly, “naughty list.” She grins.
Helen looks at Max as he fakes being offended. “I think that’s right, Lu. Dada was a very naughty boy this year.” She says with an accusing tone.
Max laughs as Luna wriggles out of her arms and back to her toys in the other room. “If Santa saw that, then you’d be on the naughty list too.” He jokes as he presses a deep kiss into Helen’s lips.
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The sound of wet feet along the wooden floors echoed through the small flat, a common occurrence since Luna had started rejecting bath time again . Tonight had been no different than every night the previous week, Luna had gotten into the bath just fine, but once it came time to wash her hair she’d start splashing Max, Helen, or the both of them, ultimately resulting in everyone coming away from the bath drenched in water.
“Luna, come back here!” Max yells after her as Helen tosses him a small pink towel.
Luna continues to run rampant around the flat, “I Rudolph, Dada.” She reasons.
Helen laughs as she steps out of the bedroom, and catches Luna mid run to the living area. “Gotcha,” Helen says as she scoops her up in the towel, “It’s time for bed, Rudolph.”
Luna pouts, a pout that Helen is nearly immune to after seeing it on Max’s face daily for the last three years, “Mum read the story? Pwetty pwease?” Luna begs as she clings to Helen’s shirt.
Helen gives in once she settles Luna down to put her in her pj’s, “one story, ok?” Helen resolves with a sigh, “Come here.” Helen instructs as she moves to sit down on Luna’s new toddler bed.
They’d decided to toss the crib after making the move, effectively deciding that it was time that Luna could move to a toddler bed since she’d now have her own room. They’d also been working on potty training, which had become more of Max’s responsibility since he’d been home with her for the whole time they’d been in London.
Helen scoots to the edge of the bed to make room for Max to sit on the other side with Luna in between them. “The Grinch, huh?” Max laughs as he sees Luna’s book of choice.
“I’ll read a couple pages, we’ll finish it tomorrow, Lu.” Helen explains as she opens the familiar children’s book.
“The Grinch hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season!...
I MUST find some way to stop Christmas from coming…
That’s one thing he hated! The NOISE! NOISE! NOISE! NOISE!”
About ten pages into the book, Helen can feel Luna’s head getting heavy on her side. Luna was exactly like Max in that sense, she’d go as hard as she could until she couldn’t anymore. But that was something Helen loved most about the energetic little girl. Her passion and love was evident in every characteristic of her being.
It’s in moments like this that Helen truly can’t believe her life. A year ago, maybe even 6 months ago, this life was only a figment of her imagination. A life with Max, a life with Luna seemed almost impossible. For the longest time she never imagined that her family would look like this, a Mum, Dad, and daughter. After Mo died all she ever thought was it would be her and her son or daughter, she wouldn’t have ever dreamed of a father as amazing as Max.
Max looks at Helen with a soft smile and places Luna’s head on the pillow as Helen gently slides off the other side of the bed. “She’s out,” Max says as he closes the door to Luna’s room, it was small but filled with a larger than life imagination, something more valuable than any toy or stuffed animal.
Helen smiles at Max as they walk into the living area and she catches another glimpse of the Christmas tree and decorated fireplace mantle. “You know,” Max says as he approaches Helen and lays his hand in the swell of her back, “Christmas is my favourite holiday. All the lights, trees, and good food, what could be better than that?” He states in a very typical Goodwin manner.
“I guess family was always what I loved most about the holiday,” Helen explains. “Whether that was our friends back in New York or this little family we have, but that was it for me.” Christmas wasn’t about gift-giving when she was young, it was all about gathering with all her aunts and uncles, her Nan sometimes, gathering together to eat a meal. It was the one time of year they put aside all the complicated family dynamics to just enjoy each other’s company.
Max moves to sit down on the soft couch, pulling Helen into his lap. “Christmas was always big in my house when I was young, Luna and I would get up really early to go and spy on all the presents, and then we’d jump onto my parents bed the second the clock turned to 7. That was the earliest they’d let us get up.” Max reminisces. Christmas used to be the best holiday in his home, and he’d do anything for his daughter to have those same memories he did. “What’s your favorite Christmas memory?”
Helen thinks back, sighing, “We didn’t really celebrate Christmas when I was young, my father was Islamic so it really wasn’t something he participated in. However, the last Christmas he spent with my Mum and I, we all went out to the frozen pond down the street, it had been frozen for a couple of weeks, and my baba had bought me a pair of ice skates, so we all skated along the frozen ice. It was one of the only memories my mother will ever discuss when it comes to my Baba.” Helen explains. Christmas hadn’t been about the religious side until she was older, but it had always been special .
Max nods at her explanation. He’d known that she’d grown up with both Islamic and Catholic influence, something she had told him a few weeks ago. “My family never really cared about the religious side of Christmas. We went to church once on Christmas Eve, but I don’t really remember it. And after Luna died, my parents usually sent me off to my grandparent’s house after they’d given me a few gifts. They just couldn’t stand doing a family event without her,” Max states. His amazing Christmas memories had been so quickly tainted by lonely ones after Luna died.
Helen looks at him sympathetically, “I'm sorry, but hey, there’s always time for a fresh start.” she says with a smile, “This year, let’s make some new Christmas memories.”
Max gazes into her chocolate eyes, getting lost in the depth and soul in her precious orbs, “Christmas here, with you, it’s all I’ll ever need.” Max says as Helen moves to rest her head on his chest, listening to the calming sound of his heartbeat. And for just a moment, the whole world stands still, snow falls from the dark night sky, and the feeling of Christmas takes permanent root in their hearts.