Archive of Our Own

It's morning. The sunshine is warm. The sky is cloudless. The birds are tweeting. 

And the crow phone in front of you is screaming its' head off.

"-and then, Reggie dropped all the spider muffins right onto the floor. He couldn't believe my kid got into the Emperor's Coven. I even showed him your acceptance letter too. You should have seen the look on his face. Ha!" Your dad's voice rambles on from the crow's open beak. "He still had to remake those muffins though."

You groan, lowering the cloak in your ungloved hand because- ugh- why?

"Dad. Please don't tell me you actually brought my letter to work?"

"I framed it and everything." Your father cheerfully replies and, yeah, you definitely should have expected this. It didn't make the urge to thunk your head into the nearest wall any less tempting though. Sadly- or fortunately- you happen to share a wall so that's out of the question.

"Don't tell me it's-"

"Hanging right above the entrance so everyone can see? Absolutely."

Actually, head-bashing sounds like a fantastic idea right about now. Screw neighbors. Anything to take your mind off your rapidly reddening ears was good enough at this point. 

"Dad, you really didn't have to do that. It's just the Emperor's Coven. Anyone has a chance of joining."

Well. That's partially true- if you don't take into account the number of spells you know or how good at magic you actually are or the type disadvantages of certain magical tracks. You know, the little things.

Your dad, though, obviously thinks it's anything but little. 

"Psh! Don't sell yourself short, kiddo. You got in there fair and square- and you beat someone who was in the plant track."

Oh no. Not this again. "Um, you really don't have to go through the whole spiel again-"

"I mean-" And there he goes. "-that other kid almost had you in the end there and, I won't lie, I was pretty nervous myself- but you sure showed him!"

"I didn't-"

"When he uprooted all those roots, I was sure you'd have been thrown out of bounds- but then you outmaneuvered him and sent him out of bounds!"

"Again, Dad, he tripped-"

"Out of bounds! I couldn't believe it! That was genius, is what I told Reggie. I mean, you already had a bit of an upper hand since that kid was already a part of the Gardening Coven-"

"Really, he tripped-"

"-and while, sorry kiddo, your ice spells weren't going to do much against, well, plants, and your lute.... But! You did it! I said to Reggie-"

"Dad, please." You stressed. "I don't need to hear the full story. Again."

Your dad was silent for a moment and you used that time to hastily shove on the rest of your uniform. You loved your dad but you'd rather not go through drills today with your red ears and flustered stuttering. Finn would mock you for sure.

"Alright, alright. That's enough out of your old man." He relented and you couldn't help but sigh in relief. Thank goodness. You're not sure you could listen to him gush over your- extremely exaggerated- tryout match. It had been both an embarrassing and incredibly lucky spectacle. Mostly lucky.

"Besides," He continued on. "I'm sure you've got a busy day today. And speaking of busy, you mentioned in your last scroll about a promotion. Said something about a mission?" 

You stilled in pining the clasp to your cloak, fingers fiddling with the metal. "Well, um, I guess it's a promotion. I got moved to night time patrol so that's something."

"Of course it's something! Serving the Emperor isn't some small achievement, kiddo. But back on track, how'd your first mission go?"

"It was pretty... interesting. The walk to get there took forever and the terrain was pretty rocky."

"And?" The crow perched on your window sill hopped a bit closer to you.

"Well, we didn't find much. Just a huge river and a cavern and..." You thought of a roaring river; the warm glow of red enveloping you. The depths of a hidden cave and the tap against your shin. The Golden Guard standing in the acidic rain, your gloved hand uncurling to wave-

You clipped the clasp onto your cloak with a clack.

"...And, um, we found a weird cave but that's all, really. It wasn't as eventful as I thought, to be honest."  It was more eventful, but you'd rather not tell your dad about your casual conversations with the Golden Guard. It was embarassing to remember and you had to be breaking some sort of protocal because surely making a fool of yourself infront of your coven leader was a crime.

Also, it was painfully awkward and you'd rather not relive through tha again, thank you very much.

"Hm," Your dad's humming, low and long, echoed through your tiny dorm. "Well, I'm sure it'll be different next time. Anyways-"

Knock! Knock!

"Oi, newbie!" Finn's muffled voice shouted through the door. "Let's get going. We don't have all day here."

"I'll be right out, sir!" You called out before turning to the crow with a sigh. "Sorry, Dad. I've got to go."

The crow lowered its head. "I won't keep you waiting. Talk to you soon, kiddo. Oh, and hey, do your best. I know you'll do our Emperor proud." 

And with those final words, the crow's beak snapped shut and with a flap of its' wings, flew right out the window. Right on time too, as Finn decided now was a great time to knock on your door yet again.

"Hello? You coming or what?"

"Coming, sir." You replied, shoving your mask onto your face. You didn't have any time to waste. It was training day after all. Who knows what you could learn today. Probably- definitely- a super-advanced spell. That would be so cool- or, at least, cooler than your last mission. 

At least, that's what you thought. 

All you're thinking right now though is: It’s hot.

You can feel the sun shining down on you. The sun rays, usually warm on your skin, feel like it’s slowly cooking you from the inside out; your cloak had long since become your very own personal furnace. The wind is absent today and you long for the feeling of a cool breeze to grace your presence. Sadly, all you get is endless heat and constant sweating.

Quite frankly, it's disgusting and you really wish you could take your mask off to wipe the sweat beading there, but you can't. You have to maintain your formation after all.

Your knees shake as you try your best to stand up straight. Your arm, sore and tired, tremble as you struggle to level the training wand in your shaky grasp.

'Focus,' You tell yourself. 'Focus, focus, focus.'

Still, it doesn't help make the beads of sweat rolling down the back of your neck any less distracting.

‘Focus,’ You scold yourself. ’Just a little bit longer...’ You almost got it...

You feel your grip loosening around the wand, your fingers slipping in its' grasp. Maybe if you just-

You loosen your grip just a tad, your finger shifting and shuffling to curl adjust around the shaft. It takes one second, a tiny moment, but it’s enough for the orange light glowing flickering to life in front of you to dissipate.

Crap. Not again.

A whistle blows low and sharp into the empty training ground.

“Wow,” You hear Finn say. “That was… really sad.”

Your shoulders rise at his words and humiliation bleeds a vibrant, heated red on your already flushed face.

“I know, I know.” You mutter half-heartedly, already frustrated and embarrassed at your meager attempt at another advanced fire spell. Apparently, it was supposed to be a large wave of fire. You say apparently because all you'd done so far is conjure small fireballs, which did nothing to the unscathed and unburnt training dummies in front of you.

Well, at least it was better than guard duty. Even though you’d been given a promotion of sorts- thanks to your esteemed mentor- it hadn't meant much. All you'd done was trade one hallway for, well, more hallways. At least the sight didn't get too boring; your new post may be stationed near the old library, but even that was more eventful than an empty hall. 

Still, counting tiny cracks and chipped pillars could only entertain you for so long. You really hoped another mission would come up, but you hadn't heard anything yet and Finn never said anything so... Guess you had plenty of time to count all the square tiles on the floor. Yay.

“Hey, you done yet?” He says from his perch behind you.“Not that your little light show wasn't great and all, but I'm a busy guy. So, you know, mind hurrying it up?”

Behind you, Finn lets out a long- clearly exaggerated- yawn. What he has to be bored about is beyond you. He's not the one standing out in the sun for hours on end. Especially when it’s hot and you’re tired and sweating and gross and you still can't get this dumb spell right.

You exhale a short breath through your nostrils, long and harsh and dragged out. You'd never felt more frustrated. “Yes, sir.” You mumble, annoyance bubbling on the tip of your tongue.

You should be used to this by now- your superior's nonchalant attitude. After all, weren't mentors supposed to be helpful. Instead, all Finn had done all day was make incredibly un-helpful comments, laugh each time a spell exploded in your face, and yawn. 

'Well,' You think to yourself as you lift the training wand back up. 'At least he's good for something.' 

Who knew frusteration was a great motivator? Your arm may be trembling, your grip on the wand wavering, but you can't deny how easily your magic burst forth.

You feel it congests to the tips of your fingers in a rush of warmth- like the sunshine on your skin- before it's all but sucked into the training wand. A shiver runs down your spine at the chilly sensation that rushes through you, like a brush of a cool breeze against your skin, as your magic slowly but surely drains from you. Almost immediately, exhaustion hits you because, whew, this spell takes a lot more magic than you thought, but it's worth it in the heat emitting from the training wand. The magic- your magic- swirling inside is electric in its' lingering touch, the familiar sensation that you can only describe as you humming as it swells within the wand. 

This fire spell takes a lot of magic, sure, but still... you can tell it's not as much as you thought. At most, it's enough for one spell.

A spell that, yet again, explodes right in your face. You hadn't even had time to actually conjure the spell circle. It'd only taken one second, one measely second in which you'd tried to make your magic into something more, before the entire spell circle collapsed.

Ugh. Not again. 

“Well, that was exciting to watch,” Finn drawls out. “Got any more party tricks to show?”

You lower your arm in defeat. Your muscles sigh in relief, but it tastes bittersweet on your tongue. 

A spike of frustration surges up within you and you let out a short huff as you tap-tap-tap the training wand against your aching finger.

"Maybe this thing's broken..." You fume underneath your breath, irritation laced within each muttered word because you almost had it. Or, well, you would have had it....

It seems you weren't quiet enough, however.

There’s the clambering boots echoing off the training ground walls. You don’t have to turn to know it’s Finn, only feel the familiar- annoying- pressure of his arm on your head before he all but plucks the training wand out of your hand.

“Hey-“ You protest, but it’s quickly silenced by the easy motion of him lifting the wand, conjuring a glowing circle in the air, and watching as a stream of fire spills out from the orange circle. With a flick of his wrist, the training dummies standing before you are swallowed up by the tidal wave of barreling fire. 

He lowers the wand and both the wave of fire and the orange circle evaporate into thin air.

You try not to frown underneath your mask. Now he was just messing with you. 'Show-off'.

“Hm, works fine to me.” Finn declares, tossing the training wand behind his back and all but ignoring how you rush to catch it. "And with that... I think that's enough for today. I don't know about you but I'm bored- starving."

"But I can keep going, sir!" You protest. "I almost had it that last time-" Well, not really, but still. "-and I'm sure if I try just once more..."

You glower at the snort Finn lets out. "Geez. Keep your knickers on, would ya? If you try again, we'll be here all night and, I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like a grand ol' time to me. Besides," He drawls, strolling out of the training ground. "If you get it or not, well... let's just say only the best make it in the Emperor's Coven, newbie."

You... think that's supposed to be motivational? "Um... thank you, sir?" 

Finn shrugged. "Whatever. Anyways, let's get going. I'd rather not stay out here any longer. It's hot."

'Yeah, I know.' You feel sweat rolling down your neck, your fingers clammy underneath your gloves, and your cloak all but drenched in sweat. You have to bite your tongue to keep your mouth shut on that one. 

Yet, as the two of you leave the training ground, the words still stick with you. 

'Only the best make in the Emperor's Coven.'

What did that mean?

The halls are as quiet as ever.

It’s night and it's as if the whole world is devoid of life; the sound of footsteps is dead and the echoing chatter of random scouts is nonexistent. White noise fills the halls.

It's quiet and silent and a bit tranquil after a whole day of Finn's helpful commentary and, oh yeah, boring.

Your only saving grace, quite honestly, to the nothingness ringing in your ears is the screams of nightly creatures currently howling at the bright moon outside the nearby window. It's a bit annoying, but it's better than listening to the flickering lanterns above you; you'd rather not sleep on the job, after all.

Not that the screaming creatures help but it's nighttime and you're tired.

You really, really should be annoyed, maybe even mad, at your great superior for shoving this at you- but, then again, you said yes so, sadly, this is on you.

Yet, it's not that bad. Sure, you're still bone-tired from training and you keep daydreaming of your bed every few seconds and it's getting really tempting to close your eyes right now and... actually scratch that. It is that bad.

'Look at the bright side. At least you're not dying in the summer heat. Besides, you're guarding the Emperor's Castle. How could that not be important? It was boring, sure, and it made you a bit tired in the morning and a bit sluggish for training but Finn had asked you and, well, you'd hate to disappoint your superior.

Still, that didn't ease the boredom or the dullness of the walls and the shiny tiles.

At least during the day, you'd hear at least one patrol stomping down the hall or the occasional chatter of passerby scouts. Here, though, there’s nothing but you, the screaming creatures, and the silence.

It makes guard duty even more boring. Dull. Lonely...

And, oh yeah, and torturous because your eye lids keep trying to close and your muscles hurt and you can't help but drone off every other second, which sucks because you're supposed to be guarding, not sleeping.

'Like there's anyone to guard from.' You sigh and, once again, wonder why you said yes to guard duty at night.

Your back twinges from standing in the same formation all day and pin-prinks of pain still stab your arms with every twitch of your limbs. The phantom sensation of the sleek training wand still brushed past your twitching fingers, making you constantly aware of both the soreness of your fingers and the ache in your palms.

You're thankful for your mask; without it, the flatness of your hair and the droopiness of your eyelids would have only added to your already gross appearance because if you look as exhausted as you feel, you’re sure you wouldn't be a pretty sight.

That doesn’t help the exhaustion you feel tugging on your very bones, seeping into your skin, and dropping your head down to your chest. The wall of the palace walls feel smooth and comfortable on your back, the tip of your chin rest comfortably on your chest, and screaming creatures outside howl a seranade in your ear-  the ghost of today’s training session whispering in your ear: 'Only the best make in the Emperor's Coven-

Creeakk!

The sound of a door opening is so sudden and out of place in your small, quiet bubble that you can’t help but startle awake. Your mask clacks against the wall as you quickly snap your head up. Spots of your daydream still linger in your vision so you blink- once, twice-  before you beadily look around because where did that noise come from and who would be up so late-

Gold flashes in your vision and every thought in your head stills to a halt.

The Golden Guard pauses midstep, his hand still on the open door.

“Oh,” He says, his obscured gaze meeting yours. “It’s you again.”

For some reason, in your idiotic brain, you feel the urge to look around to see who he could possibly be talking to when- oh, right- there's no one here but you.

You- who, for some reason, can't help but remember the gossiping chatter that followed him that day. The red, electric warmth of his witch's staff as he saved you from an acidic river. The tap of a staff against your shin in a silent warning. The dip of his helmet and the ghost of your laugh. The slow, uncurling motion of your hand waving at him-

“Um, Good afternoon, sir.” You sputter out when you finally get it through your stupid brain of yours that, hey, you should answer him and not be awkward. You feel awkward regardless though and- Wait! It's not the afternoon! “Oh, um, I mean good.. evening?” 

Okay. Just... stop talking now. You've probably already embarrassed yourself enough, not to mention you have no idea if it's even okay for you- a rookie- to speak to your superior- the coven’s head witch- without prompting. In fact, wasn't there some sort of protocol for this? A speech? Should you keep quiet? Oh geez, was that even an okay thing for you to say? You had no idea and all the responses and replies of 'Yes, sir." or "Yes, ma'am." and "No, sir." and "No, ma'am." that had been drilled into your skull at the beginning of your time here at the Emperor's Coven all but evaporates into thin air and, gah, what were you supposed to do-

A shuffle of feet on tile snaps your attention back into focus and, man, maybe you're more tired than you thought.

The Golden Guard stares at you for a moment. His head is slightly tilted to the side and you can't help but shuffle your feet, a buzz of nerves sparkling in your chest. Was.. was it something you said? Gah! You knew you should have kept quiet-

It’s then you notice the books piled in his arms.

You can’t help but blink.

The books pile high, a messy array of both thin and bulky scrolls and textbooks stacked awkwardly. You spy the spine of the bulkiest book- "The Fundamentals of Magic Types"- when you see the Golden Guard's finger twitch against the books.

 
“I… hadn’t realized it was night." He says as he looks out the grand window on the wall next to you. The creatures are still screaming at the moon. “I guess I was in there longer than I thought…” His words tamper off into a mumble and it feels almost absentminded in its’ delivery. 

You’re not sure if you’re supposed to hear his… casual reply, but maybe it’s the late-night talking.

Silence settles between you; it slots itself so seamlessly and perfectly, that you can’t help but wonder if your fumbling social inept was because of your exhaustion or the inability to know what to say to the person in front of you. You can feel words, the urge to say something- or anything in general.  But hesitation is sticky tar on your tongue. Your hands twitch at your sides and despite it not being hot or doing anything for the past hours, you don't have to take off your mask to know your face is red.

In the end, all you can do is stand there and suffer in the very obvious silence and melt in the fact that, yes, your coven leader is still standing in front of you, silent as you are and, yes, he’s also looking down, to the side, down again and-

“I’ll be going now,” He says and it feels like a hammer smashing into the wall for the way it breaks the something in the air. What that is, you have no idea nor the brain power to even ponder on that right now. Or ever.

“Of course, sir.” You practically blurt out, all but grateful for something to say. “Um, good evening." And wait, didn't you already say that? Great. Now you'v made yourself into a fool in front of your coven leader. Again.

The Golden Guard turns around, facing the empty hallway, looking to finally leave and you can't help but think, "Well, guess that's that," even though you fully plan on contemplating this social interaction later- as you do- but he.. doesn't.

He just... stands there, his gloved fingers drumming against the spine of a book.

“… You too.” You hear loud and clear in the silent hall despite the voice being so quiet. For a moment, you wonder if you're hearing things, but then the Golden Guard nods at you before he’s quickly marching down the hall and you're left there, stunned because...

Huh, You think as your eyes follow him as he walks further down the hall. As he turn the corner. Stay there as his boots clamber on polished tile and still linger long after his footsteps fade to join the silence surrounding you.

Huh. You think again as the sounds of howling animals, the flickering lanterns, and the white noise fill your ears. 

That hadn't been so bad.

It's hot outside again. 

You can feel the sun's warmth settle on your back as physically as the sweat rolling down your face. A small breeze brushes up against you, but its’ a brief pleasure and one you can’t indulge in. Not when you’re trying to focus on the training wand in your hands. Your fingers are trembling, your nails digging into the staff of the wand and you try not to notice as you focus on the small flickering light sparkling to life in front of you. 

You can feel your magic draining into the wand, feel it waver and wiggle as you focus, focus, focus on the fire spell before you. Your arms are trembling now but you can't stop because you're so close and if you can just make a simple line- 

Poof!

The orange glow combusts, bursting in a tiny shower of glowing embers. You stare, annoyance flickering inside you like that same, small, failure of a spell because not again.

"Again," Finn says behind you, oddly quiet for, well, him.

You sigh a long, heavy breath.

Man, you never realized training to be an Emperor’s Scout would be hard. 

"This time for sure," You mumble to yourself half-heartedly; a sad attempt at self-motivation because who were you kidding? You were never going to get this stupid spell.

It seems you weren't quiet enough because Finn repeats, short, low: "Again."

You startle at the tone of his voice; it makes the hairs on the back of your neck prickle because that... that's weird. Finn never sounds... short around you. You may have only been in the Emperor's Coven for a short while and you may not understand all the protocol and systems that make up the prestigious coven, but you know how your superior can be. He's nonchalant most of the time, obnoxious all the time, and he's lazy. You're still now sure how he managed to get a spot in such a coven with the work ethic he had- the Emperor's Coven was the best. Then again, you're not sure why you keep taking all the duties he shoves at you.

Still, he's the only sense of familiarity you have here. In a way, you like to think you know him. 

Yet the silent presence behind you looms over the training ground, and you can't help but notice how...  heavy the atmosphere has become. It's tense, so much so that the agitated phrases you'd mutter under your breath with each failed attempt feel dead on your tongue.   

You don't know why.

'Maybe he's tired from standing out here all day too,' Your brain helpfully ponders but the intuition doesn't seem right.

Finn was a loud, brazen personality. And now.. he's not. It's weird, odd, and the mere existence of such behavior has you lifting the wand a bit higher.

You feel the magic leaves your fingers as simply as you feel the sweat drenching your face. It congests in the tips of your fingers in a rush of warmth and leaves your fingertips in a touch of temporary coolness. You feel it swell within the wand, feel the flash of heat radating from within. 

Okay, okay. So far, so good. Maybe this one will be the one. 

Yeah.... yeah. You got this.

You’re so close to mastering this fire spell- you know you are. You can feel it in your bones. This time- this is it. 

So, in a formation you’ve been hounding on all day, you focus on the magic seeping into the training wand and push.

An orange glow burst to life in front of you, hovering its soft light midair. You can feel the magic sparking, morphing, churning with intent you have yet to form and you can’t help the small burst of giddiness you feel breaking our on your face with a grin. You did it! Now, if you can just…

It’s a strain to move your hand ever so slowly into a circle, and you can feel your arm strain underneath the slow and tiring movement, but you don’t give up- can’t. Not until you just do this spell once.

‘No,’ You think stubbornly because this attempt *has to be the one. ‘I can do this. I can do this-‘

It’s not even a millisecond before you feel your magic spazzing- shrinking- in the confides on the training wand. With a blooming panic, you try to force more magic into the wand, but it does the opposite of what you'd hoped for. The orange light sputters, convulsed in the air.

With a sad poof, the orange glow burst, exploding in a small puff of dying light. Small glimmers glitter down to the ground. You let out a breath, slow and heavy. Somehow, this failure feels more... grave than before.

It's silent in the training ground.

"Again," The word rings through the area.

You hesitate, but you lift the wand up again regardless.

Your arms ache. Your brain feels like sludge. Your fingers are limp noodles attached to longer, limper noodles. Overall, you feel like crap and, man, you're exhausted.

Ugh. You should really stop taking these nighttime guard shifts. You hundred percent sure you'll pass out on the ground later tonight- morning?- and wouldn't that be an embarrassing position to be found in.  Finn might even reprimand you, which seems more likely with his... newfound-sternness. 

Well, at least there's a bright side. At least here, you don't have to do anything in this small bubble of yours, something your muscles are grateful for. After all, it's not like anyone was going to just pop out around the corner this time of night-

Creeaakk!

You snap your head up at the sound of the opening door, lulled eyes snapping open and posture snapping up to stand tall.

'Spoke too soon,' You briefly grumble to yourself as you wonder who could be up this late.

You don't wonder long as you see that same glint of gold yet again.

The Golden Guard pauses, a few books and scrolls stuffed hastily into the crooks of his arms.

You stare at each other.

You opened your mouth to ask, but the words felt stuck; unmovable.

The awkwardness was still lingering about, stale as it was but it wasn't so bad as before. Still, it leaves your tongue wrapped in invisible chains. Maybe it was the obvious ranking of your current positions. Maybe it was your own anxiety- today had, well, not been the best. For obvious reasons. Still, the words came out slow and you could taste the uncertainty on your tastebuds. "…Good evening, sir.” You say, and for some reason, you expect Finn's harsh tongue to lash out at you from beyond the golden helmet staring at you.

"Good evening." The Golden Guard answered back and you blinked because it... didn't sound harsh. His voice was soft; his tone low. He sounded tired. "I see you’re here again.”

Something inside you eases and, huh, the words come easier. “I’m just doing my shift, sir.” 

“I.. see.”

A pause. 

“Well," The Golden Guard says after a moment. "I’ll be on my way then.”  

And with that, he left. 

His footsteps once again echoed down the halls, You listened to the sound of his boots on tiled floor stomp-stomp-stomp down the hall until it faded away to join the soft, meek sounds of the howling creatures and the flickering lanterns and the white noise filling the empty halls of the Emperor’s Castle.

You blinked- once, twice- as you strained your ears for those stomping boots and, um, okay- scratch what you thought earlier. It wasn't easier. It was painfully awkward. Badly so.

But it wasn't so bad. At least you know you won't get reprimanded. 

It was hot again.

You're too aware of the small beads of sweat dripping down the sides of your face. Too aware of it seeping its way down into the corner of your eyes and the incredibly, uncomfortable stinging sensation it brings along with it. Your hand twitches; the urge to take off your mask and wipe your face is strong. But you can't, not when you were in the middle of attempting the same damn fire spell.

You felt it eat your magic. Felt it take and take and take. But you focused, directed your magic, pushed it through the training wand. At once, the orange glow of your spell ignited, burst to life, and with shaking hands, you drew a circle into the air...

The loop finishes. The circle is complete. All at once, the circle brightens.

You break out into a grin, elation blooming inside you because you did it. You finally did it-

The circle wobbles, dims, and explodes.

The smile shatters across your face.

“Do it again,” Finn barks. “That was just sad. I can’t have the guys seeing my rookie looking weak."

You huff out a long, harsh breath and hot air exhales past your tongue. "I don't get it," You say out of turn, red creeping on your face and on th tips of your ears and fiery in your mouth.  "Why can't I just... use my magic?" 

At school, learning spells was a lot simpler. Most of it was due to your lute. All you had to do was pluck a string and boom! Spell casts. Using training wands was, well, weird.

Besides, you kind of missed playing your lute...

Finn sighed from the sidelines and shakes his head, as if he just heard the stupidest question in the world and the anger burning red hot inside you dies out and, crap, you really shoulnd't have said anything.

“What? Your bard magic? Yeah, I don’t think an instrument's gonna intimidate a wild one or any other criminals running amok recently. I mean, what you gonna do, serenade them to sleep with some lullaby?"

"...Um," You try to explain. "Actually, sir, bard magic can do a lot more than that..." You trail off at the sound of boots clambering on stone ground. You look up.

Finn's standing in front of you now and you startle back because when has he gotten so close?

"Listen, kid," He tells you and he sounds.. harsher. Stern. Not at all like he did before. "Bard magic is specifically for the Bard Coven. Last I checked, you are a part of the Emperor's Coven. And here? We do things differently."

Finn looks down at you and all your thoughts scatter at the seriousness in his posture. The rigidness of his shoulders. The upwards tilt of his head. The crossing of his arms.

"Our coven is the best of the best. The enforcers of his will. Everything we scouts do reflects on him, and that means we can't be limited by anything, least we look weak. Remember, only the best make it here.”

“Oh,” You glanced down at the training wand in your hand.

'Only the best make it here.' You remember Finn saying not to long ago.

You think you're starting to get it now...

A gloved finger taps against your mask. "Enough daydreaming, kid,” Finn says, head held high. “You want to be an official scout? Then get back to it. We don't have all day." 

You nod, trying your best to ignore the uneasy feeling in your stomach. Finn had been sounded a lot more impatient than usual lately... 

You shake your head. You can't afford to think right now, not when you have a spell to master. 

(Not with your superior right there, his fingers impatiently tap, tap, tapping against his crossed arms.)

You bring up your arm. It feels heavy and your magic feels sluggish. The heat wears down on you. Sweat rolls down into your eyes.

'Only the best make it in the Emperor’s Coven,’ You hear Finn's voice whisper in your ears.

'I know you'll do our Emperor proud.' The ghost of you dad's words join Finn's in a silent symphony.

You shake the exhaustion away, point the wand, and focus.

You were growing used to the quietness of the halls. To the white noise droning on and on in your head

The howling creatures and flickering lanterns had long since become background; it was one with the silence ringing in the empty hallways.

You were not, though, growing used to the exhaustion.

Your muscles ached, have been for quite some time now, and the stiffness of your hands still hasn't gone away. The faint smell of smoke lingers on the fabric of your cloak, potent on your gloves, and at this point, you wouldn't be suprised if the stench wasn't fogging up your mask. You're also pretty sure your hands are stained with soot.

A griffin screeched in the distance. 

The lantern's dying flame above you flickered.

Your hands trembled underneath your gloves, new calluses throbbing on the pads of your fingers. 

Training had been especially rigorous today. Or, well, Finn had made it rigorous. 

You’re still sure there’s some soot on your face- you're sure you can feel it stinging your eyes- but you haven’t had time to clean up. You'd been training all day, from morning to dusk. From explosion after explosion. Failure after failure. 

You had yet to show anything for it.

A stiff posture. Crossed arms. Head held high. Eyes looking down at you. The disappointment staring at you. 

You clenched your hands. Your fingers twitched, pain throbbing from your overworked digits. Your feet shuffled, platforms and heels aching from standing all day. 

You sure hoped you mastered this spell... No, no. You will master this spell. It just took time, is all. Just watch! You'll have it down by tomorrow. You know you will...

'Only the best make it...'

...And.. and it'll be fine. Everything will be fine. You'll be fine. Like your dad said, you got in here fair and square. You can master this stupid spell. Sure, you can't use your usual way of magic... but it's fine! You're a part of the Emperor's Coven- the best of the best. You won the tryouts, so you can definitely get this spell down.

'Our coven is the best of the best. The enforcers of his will. Everything we scouts do reflects on him.'

It'll just take a little more time. Just a little more time, and then you'll be an official scout. Sure, the magic still backfired and self-destructed in your face, fogging up your mask with smoke and causing flashes of searing pain to reach your delicate skin through the leathery gloves...

'Serving the Emperor isn't some small achievement, kiddo.'

But you could do it! Then you'll finally be an official scout and Finn won't look so disappointed and keep saying 'Again' and 'Again' and 'Again' so much you could hear it even when you sleep and you won't have to keep ignoring the crow phone outside your window, screeching and screeching and you know Dad's expecting news. Something good. But not to worry! You'll master this spell and you'll tell him and maybe you'll even be able to go on another mission and capture a witch or something and that'll make him proud, right?

'I know you'll do our Emperor proud.'

You inhaled. Your breath stuttered.

... Maybe you really should stop doing these late-night guard duties. 

Then again, your dad had sounded proud when you told him about your promotion. Sure, it was just another standing around in different parts of the castle at night, but he sounded so happy.

So- you can do this: master an advanced spell and guard the halls at night. That's what it took to be an official scout. Right?

You can do it.

‘Only the best make it in the Emperor’s Coven.’

You can do it...

Your hands twitch at your sides, fingers twitching to grasp at something not there, something thin and long and pale and pulsing with magic. Something that pulled, churned, morphed your magic into something new- something more- only to spit it back at you in a fiery ball of smoke and heat-

The door to your right opened with a creak.

Your head turns towards the side and somehow, you already know who’s leaving the library long before you see him. It feels like a pattern, of sorts. A familiarity.

Your fingers twitch again. You ignore it.

“Good evening, sir” You greet as a golden helmet moves from behind the door. It's weird how easily the words slip past your lips now that you know you won't get reprimanded for talking. It's a complete one-eighty from your training sessions with Finn. It's as if every sentence spoken from you makes his bark even more snippy.

“Good evening, scout.” The Golden Guard replies, nodding. It's also weird how not weird it is to see him with a new book or scroll. “I see you’re here again.”

You nod back, and it feels a bit.. freer. Less nervewracking. Nothing at all like you'd felt all-day training with Finn: tense and anxious.

After all, Finn wasn't here. Nor was his crossing arms, his stern voice, or his tap-tap-tapping foot.

The Golden Guard was, and his drumming fingers didn't make the hairs along your arms rise. It was kind of odd, seeing how The Golden Guard was a higher rank than Finn but, well, he hadn't reprimanded you yet so you must be doing something right.

“I’m just doing my job, sir. Guard duty.” You said, hearing your own voice bounce off the walls and it sounds so loud in the quietness surrounding you. 

You don't hate it. In fact, you welcome it. 

Anything was better than the constant white noise and screaming animals.

“Ah. That’s…good.” The Golden Guard says, tap-tap-tapping his fingers against his books. “Good.”

The conversation dies away. Voices stop echoing down the empty halls and silence comes swarming back to fill in the space. You feel your feet shuffling below you. Your fingers twitch, though you barely notice the ache. His hands drum that same beat along the spines of the books. His golden helmet tilts downward to the side.

It's easier to talk but that doesn't make this whole thing less awkward.

'Well,' You can't help but think. 'At least it's better than training.'

You clear your throat and grimace at how loud it sounds in the vacant halls. “Um….”You begin timidly, only to realize that you have no idea what to say.” I…”

You see him glance up at you from the corner of your eye, the small tilt of his head, and you can feel his eyes on you even with the golden helmet. Nonetheless, his attention is on you regardless and the presence of it has you breaking out in the smallest of sweats.

Actually, you take that back. Training is easier than this.

“Uh,” You begin, throwing your nerves practically boiling underneath your skin because you can stand the silent halls and harsh training sessions, but awkward silences with your coven leader is, you find out just right now, worse. Still, you weren't getting yelled at so you should be fine. 

(You think.)

“Can..." You pause and let the silence linger as you test the waters.

Nothing.

The Golden Guard is still standing there. Quiet.

Okay. That was probably a good sign- now you know for sure you won't get reprimanded- and the words pour out of your mouth, slowly and hesitantly. "May I ask why you're out? Here. At night I mean.” 

You stiffen slightly in the silence that follows, the anxiety eating at you. Maybe you did say something wrong? Are questions considered wrong? You have no idea and, quite frankly, you’re not sure what you’re expecting. A reply? Or maybe he won't answer at all. That's a possibility too. Getting scolded? If it's anything like Finn's offhand comments, you're sure it won't be nice. Either way, you're sure it'll end badly and-

“Oh, no. That’s fine.” He says, and you can't help the sheer surprise that he actually answered. “It’s nothing much. I’m just…” He titters off, quiet for the smallest of seconds. The books in his arms jostle. He shifts his arm. 

“...Researching. I‘m just researching. It’s not much, just the different types of magic and the categories and subcategories they all fall under. After the last mission, I was curious about the marking so I looked into it. I thought there might be something in these books, is all. We have a lot of artifacts from the wild witches we’ve captured over the years, but the texts are probably the most interesting of the bunch. After all, wild magic is extremely old, but the coven system didn’t get implemented until after- forty? fifty?- years ago, and-“ He stutters to a stop, words crashing to a halt at such a fast pace, you can’t help but blink.

You... hadn't expected him to say that much. In fact, you really hadn't expected him to answer you at all. Still, you stand there, waiting for him to say more but... he doesn't.

The Golden Guard stands there, his helmet looking towards the ground. 

...

Um. Okay.

You can’t help the slight tilt of your head. Huh, why'd he stop? Sure, you weren't book smart in school- you were in the bard track and the only thing you read was music sheets- but still, it seemed interesting.

“…That doesn't sound too long ago.” You say, voice soft and faint.

The Golden Guard looks up at you, the gold of his helmet gleaming in the dim lantern light above. It’s hard to make out the expression on his face, but you think it’s something akin to surprise with how he straightens. 

“No… not really.” He answers slowly. Hesitantly. Huh.

“Anyways I thought-” He begins with a lilt in his voice, a shoulder rising in a shrug. “Hey! Maybe I could find something that could label what those carvings on the cave wall meant and-“

He motions one of his hands towards the library door beside you and it’s when you turn to follow his hand that you miss the books titter in his arms. 

You turn just in time to see the book fall to the ground with a loud thud. It tumbles across the tiled floors and skids the short distance to your feet. You don't even need to think about moving. One second, you're staring at the book, and the next second, it's in your hands. 

Oh. Um. You hadn't meant to do that. 

You stare at the book. It's heavy and you can smell the faint, tange of magic emitting from it.

Slowly, you extend it towards him because, well, it was already in your hands...

“Um, here.” You say, fighting back a wince. You completely forgot about the pain in your sore fingers. 

You sure hope it's not noticeable.

The Golden Guard stares down at the bulky book. You can’t see his eyes, you never can, but the softness of his voice speaks volumes. “Thanks.” He says simply and you only nod as he slowly reaches over to take the book back-

Then he stops.

You look up, confused. Was.. something wrong?

The Golden Guard is staring at the book still.

"Is your hand... hurt?” He asks, his helmet tilting to the side and it's only then you notice the book in your hands is trembling.

You shuffle on your feet, ears growing red. “Um, I was training today, sir.” You mumble, averting your eyes to the floor- he won’t see it nor can he see your face, but yet you can’t help but avert your gaze least he sees your shame. "We're mastering an advanced fire spell. A wave of fire, to be exact.”

“Oh." He says, still staring at the book- at your shaking hands. "A wave of fire, huh? And... you hurt your hand doing it.” 

"Um, well, yes. Sir." You mumble out, ears red because you hadn't noticed how... weak that sounds. The Emperor's Coven was the best of the best, full of talent and power, and here you are, getting hurt over learning a spell. 

“...I remember learning about that." The Golden Guard suprised you by saying. Your head snaps up to find him staring at you. "It’s difficult to master, right next to lightning. It’s a bit tricky. Add too much magic too quickly and it combusts and sputters out. It’s actually really similar to plant magic; those sort of spells can do with a lot with a little, so it can grow pretty fast and-“ He pauses and clears his throat suddenly. 

“Uh, anyway, I’ll, um, be going. Bye.” He nods at you, rushed, and you barely have time to blink before he's walking down the hall, his footfalls echoing in a staccato.

Um.

You open your mouth- once, twice- as his figure disappears around the hall, more or less a bit overwhelmed at, well, everything. 

“…Bye.” You finally got your dumb mouth to say. 

Your voice bounced off in the now-empty corridor until it faded to nothing but white noise.

The sky was cloudy today.

You stood in the training grounds once again. The training wand- sleek, white, shiny- was clenched between your trembling fingers, and for once, you didn't feel the heat of your gloves stick to your skin. It was a small miracle, along with the nonexistent sunshine shining down on your back; the weather was fair, the sun hidden away behind two grey clouds. 

It made holding your stance much easier. 

'The stance is important,' Finn crowed over and over again. 'We're Emperor Scouts so how we hold ourselves says a lot to the folks beyond these walls. Got it, kid?'

Oh, you most certainly got it. But, in all honestly, it was doing nothing for your spell casting. Nope. Nothing at all.  

When your sad excuse for a fire spell sputters out yet again, you can't help but cringe at the poof of magic. It almost feels like something in the air is crumbling as you watch what was a small glow of light sprinkle away into embers.

"Again." Finn orders from behind you. No lectures. No more teasing comments. Just that one word bouncing off the empty, training ground.

Just as it had been for the past hour. Had been for the past week.

Over and over and over again.

Your arms feel like lead when you pick up the wand once again, raising it up to point at the straw dummy before you. 'One more try,' You tell yourself; a mantra of half-hearted, self-motivation. 'Just one more try. I can do this. I can do this.'

The incentive is stale on your tongue; an aging proclamation that you're not even sure works anymore. It doesn't feel like it does, because it doesn't make you feel any better about this next attempt.

Frankly, you're even wondering if you can do it at this point...

“Oi! Watcha standing around for, kid? You gonna keep going or are you gonna stand around there all day?" Finn barks at your jump at the sudden sound of his voice.

“Sorry, sir.” You tugged at the edge of your glove, fingers fumbling nervously for something to do. You... weren't sure what you were doing at this point. 

You felt stuck.

You could- should- always try again but... you didn't know what to do. Should you try to push more magic into the wand? It's an option, but you're barely able to stand on your feet, much less stay in the same practiced stance you'd been in all week. You couldn't use too little either; there wouldn't be enough magic to even summon a mere spell circle.

And it wasn't like you could give up either. Finn already looked so disappointed by your exploding embers. If you couldn't do this, could you even be an official scout? 

'Only the best make it in the Emperor's Coven.' 

If you couldn't do this... were you not the best then? Did you not even qualify anymore? Would... could the Emperor kick you out for this? You'd already passed the tryouts- surely not learning this dumb spell wasn't that bad of a regression.

Sure, Finn was looking a bit more impatient by all this, but that was probably just because he had to stand here all day and watch you practice. And yeah, he did seem a bit short with you recently- but that could be because of the sun and the heat and whatnot. But he hadn't made a teasing comment in a while... He hadn't messed with your hood lately either and, while you're grateful for that, he always took an opportunity to mess with you because it was funny.

Plus, he started calling you "kid" instead of "newbie"...

..But that could mean anything. 

You'll learn this spell- but if you didn't, then what? 

You think of your father's voice gushing with praise. The framed acceptance letter hanging above the front door. The pride in his voice as he said through a crow phone's beak, "I'm proud of you, kiddo." 

Your fingers yanked the leather glove. 

'What am I supposed to do-'

“Hurry it up, kid.” Finn’s voice startled you back- once again- to attention. "Even the other little runts can do this. You better hop to it or you'll fall behind and, well, if you want to keep your place here, you better hurry it up. We can’t do the Emperor’s work without the best at his steed."

Your lips tightened into a thin line. He was right. This should be easy. You were a part of the Emperor's Coven, one of the most prestigious covens to get into- and hence, the hardest to get into. You got in. You should be able to do this. You should just... get this.

Only the best are able to get into the Emperor's Coven, after all.

'If I don't though...' 

You thought of Finn's crossed arms. Your acceptance letter hanging above your dad's shop. The Golden Guard's obscured gaze...

Anytime now, kid." He drawled, sounded more like himself than he had all day. "And try not to combust it this time too. I'd rather not be the laughing stock of the entire barracks for having the one trainee  who couldn't do a simple fire spell.”

'Simple?'' Yeah, you'd have to disagree with that one. Conjuring a giant wave of fire was in no way easy. In fact, it was difficult to master-

'It’s difficult to master, right next to lightning.'

You thought of a dimly lit hallway. An open library door.

Ugh. Not now brain-

 'Add too much magic too quickly,' The books were stacked in his arms, piled high with scrolls and textbooks. 'And it combusts and sputters out.'

A tilt of his head. The quick flash of flickering lantern light glinted off his helmet. 'It’s actually really similar to plant magic. Those sort of spells can do with a lot with a little.'

A lot with a little...

Your eyes widened. 

Oh.

Oh.

You readied your stance again, lifted the wand, and pulled your magic forward. Except this time, instead of shoving it all into the wand at once, you slowly pushed your magic forth, little by little. You felt the wand eagerly take it up, felt it morph, change, warmth circulating from within and then, like all other attempts, it ignited. 

You wait for the spell to combust. To sputter.

It doesn’t. It glows.

You froze. It... it didn't explode.

You couldn't help the grin splitting your face. 

Okay! And now to...

The magic swimming around in the training wand grows warm in your hands. You steadily move the wand. The glow follows, an orange half-circle drawn in the sky. It stays. It gleams. It grows.

With rising elation, you complete the circle. 

With a fwoosh, a tiny flame burst to life from the tip of your wand. Quickly- in case this was a one-time thing- you throw the spell forward and all at once, you feel heat seeping in through your gloves, warming your cloak, and you can feel the fire through the holes of your mask as a wave of the flames spills out from the spell's light.

The spell circle evaporates. The flames die down.

The training dummies before you are no longer unscathed and unburnt.

You stare at it. You… you did it. You did it!

 You couldn't wait to tell your dad-

A hand landed heavily on your head and you jumped.

“Well,” Finn says, hand ruffling your hood. “Guess we’ll make you into an official scout yet.”

'I know you'll do our Emperor proud." 

 
You blink and turn to stare back at the burn training dummies before you. A small spark of pride ignited within you. 

"Of course, sir," You say, and you can’t help but believe it. 

"Now," Finn says as he moves away, you trailed not far behind. "Let's get some grub. I don't know about you but I'm starving."

Food.. sounds really good right now.

"Yep! And we have a long day tomorrow too. Since you've got that fire spell down... time to move onto lightning."

You couldn't help but trip.

Later that night, as you stand next to the flickering lanterns and howling creatures screaming at the moon and silent halls easing you to sleep, you feel more awake than you'd ever been.

It's hard not to. Not after the day you'd had.

'Only the best make it in the Emperor's Coven.' 

You weren't the best yet nor were you the greatest spell caster but, just for today, you felt like you could be. For you dad, Finn, the Emperor...

It felt... nice.

Creeak!

The door to the library opens. You don't jump at the sound. Not anymore. In a weird way, you almost expected it to open. That, and the flash of gold.

"Good evening, sir." The words pass your lips with ease. It's weird, how easy it had gotten to say two, simple words.

The Golden Guard's helmet dips towards you as he passes by. "Good evening."

It's a simple greeting, but your voices fill the silent hallway regardless. It makes the white noise constantly ringing in your ear just a bit more bearable.

Your superior shuffles the pile in his arms. It's only a handful of scrolls this time. It looks much easier to handle than usual. 

"I... see your hand looks better." 

You blink behind your mask before turning your gaze down. Your hands hand loosely by your side, though it hurts to fully bend your fingers still; your palms ache and your hands occasionally twitch but, other than that, the tremors are gone.

"Yes, sir. I'm... feeling better today." Your voice bounces down the empty corridor. It's nice to hear- anything was after a while. 

He nods. "Oh. That's good." A pause. You shuffle your feet. He tap-tap-taps his fingers against the scrolls.

"...Bye." He says simply as he turns to leave- as he has done all the other nights you'd seen him in these silent halls before- and maybe it's your good mood after finally acing that fire spell giving you just a tiny amount of courage. Or it's your exhaustion talking. Either way, the words blurt out of your mouth before you have a chance to think.

"Sir?" You hear yourself say. "Um... thank you for, uh, help with that fire spell."

The Golden Guard pauses.

What follows is silence.

You feel heat on the back of your neck, sweat beginning to bead along your forehead and, okay, now you're regretting saying anything at all.

You'd thought, those nights ago, that he'd given you some sort of hint. Advice, perhaps. But now, standing here like an idiot, you can't help but think: "Yeah, I am an idiot."

Thankfully, before you can regret your life choices, the Golden Guard speaks.

"It's nothing," It's soft-spoken but his voice echoes down the halls as loudly as the screaming creatures outside because- what? "I'm just returning the favor, is all." 

You blink- once, twice. "...Huh?" Because, sure, you didn't expect much but certainly not... this.

"You don't have to thank me or anything," He continues on. "It wasn't that big of a deal. I'm sure you would have gotten it eventually. Anyways, I'll be going now."

And with that, the Golden Guard walks down the hall and around the corner and... you try to compute because-"Huh?" You repeat.

What was that all about? 

Returning the favor?

What did he mean by that? You couldn't think of anything special you'd done, much less so late at night. All you did was tell him 'Good evening.' every time he passed by.