Work Text:
Nov. 1
Dear Diary,
This is silly. Giraffes can’t write. At least not easily. But Peter built me this nifty writer thing I can just talk into and it writes on my notebook page just like if I was doing it myself and I can change the fonts and put in little doodle pictures and wow this is really cool! Not sure why they want me to keep a diary. I suspect it’s just something they think I should do to keep me busy or something - so I’m not bothering them. It’s not like I’m gonna write anything personal in here for anyone to find. No concept of privacy around here. Ha. I should know! No doors, who wouldn’t expect a little giraffe to just come waltzing right in whenever, right? And it’s waaay more fun if I just happen to sneak in and scare them sometimes. Cuz it’s, well, fun! And they think I haven’t heard them. Recently. Saying they want to put a bell collar on me so I can’t do that any more. Welllll…..they got another thing comin’ if they try that. Just let em try! Ha ha!
Nov. 3
Dear Diary
We had a great day today! Everyone had the afternoon off and Arborus, the dude who works in the human-food garden, gave everyone a surprise hay ride and picnic party. I got to ride on one of the carts with Matter Master David and his lab crew, cuz I’m light and tiny and fit right into a space they had there just for me. We caught a lot of the falling leaves and had our own little hay fight and I got all the hay built into a little nest all around me and it was so nice and snug and I was so happy to be with people all having fun for a change. No one ever wants to have fun around me, usually. I always want to have fun…but it always seems when I want to have fun everyone else is busy. But today was fun, with the ride and the party and the bonfire. I wish we could do that every day
Nov. 6
I can’t remember to write in this thing every day. Not sure why they want me to do this. They keep asking if I keep up with it but I sometimes wonder why. Do they secretly read it when I’m not here? Do they think I might say something about them? Or what? I don’t know. They said to just think on the day and all the stuff I did and and…and I don’t know why I’m crying. Giraffes don’t cry. Do they? It’s just…just…I was down in the foyer today and the Fedex man came and he dropped off a box and he patted me on the head and he…and he said I was a nice doggy. Good doggy. Couldn’t he see I’m a giraffe? A cute little baby giraffe? I’m not a doggy. I’m not anyone’s pet. I’m not! Peter has fish up in his office. Dumb fish. Those are pets. I’m not a pet. I’m….I’m….me….
Nov. 7
Dumb diary
I hate this thing. Don’t want to write in it. So I won’t…
Nov. 10
Dear Diary
I’m scared. It’s dark. Really dark. And no one is awake and I really need someone to talk to and all I have is this diary. I’m supposed to be powered down asleep. It’s against the rules to be awake after lights out. Rules shmules. But…but I don’t like the dark. I wish I could sleep but tonight it’s really hard. I can’t. I can’t go to sleep. Don’t want to. They might… they might come and put me in a crate and I might wake up and it’ll be 100 years later and everyone I know now will be…dead…. Again…..
Nov. 11
It’s dark again and I really can’t sleep. Again.
Nov. 12
Rabbit asked me why I was so quiet today. Like that’s a weird thing? Okay, maybe it is? I dunno. Don’t care any more. I’m just gonna stay here in my room…
Nov. 13
Okay, weird thing. The Spine came and visited me today. He said he was worried about me.The Spine? Worried? About me? That’s just too weird….
Nov. 14
Finally powered down last night. I think. At least I hope that’s what it was.
Nov. 15
The Spine came and visited me again. He said he “missed my shenanigans.” I don’t think so. I don’t think he misses me at all. I wish I could tell him about the dream. It’s a really bad dream but it doesn’t start off that way. It starts off as a really nice dream, a nice fluffy dream full of singing and dancing. We’re doing a show, The Spine and I, and we’re dancing and we’re singing a duet, and he’s telling me how much like a diamond I am but then…then it turns into a nightmare….cuz I wake up….and it’s all….just a….dream…..
Nov. 18
Haven’t slept. Can’t sleep. Can’t….
Nov. 19
Dear Diary
I know it’s late and we’re supposed to be asleep. But the most awesome thing happened. I was lying here…yeah…I was crying…maybe a little...and a soft voice called my name from the hallway. It was Norman. I don’t know if you’ve met Norman. He’s a human here, but he doesn’t look like the others. Some of the other bots think he’s a ghost but he’s not. He heard me and he asked if I was okay. He sounded like he really cared. He said sometimes when he couldn’t sleep he would go for a walk in the garden. He’s a human, he can do that. I’m not allowed outside after dark. But he said, “come on, let’s go for a walk.” So we went down the stairs. Quietly. The Spine caught us, not sure how he was still up so late, but he gets away with a lot more than most of us. Norman just said, “we’re going out for a walk” and out we went.
I’d never been in the garden at night. Norman seemed to know it really well and we took the Wall Path around the garden where Arborus works. We were very quiet though. Even his horse didn’t hear us. We just walked. Quietly. When we got back up to the patio by the house, Norman finally said something. He said, “G.G. no one is going to hurt you here. They all really do love you.” How did he know? How did he know I was afraid of being put away again and forgotten for 100 years.
We sat on one of the benches down there. Just sat. He held me close and we just sat, watching the full moon rise. There were these cool clouds that crossed in front of it. All glowy-like. He said, “Those clouds are like the clouds within you. They are trying to shut out the light, but the moon is too strong for them. You are too strong for them. Shine bright G.G. Shine bright.”
Nov. 20
So today I talked with the person that asked me to write this journal. They are really nice. They come to visit a couple times a week. Not just to see me. I’m pretty sure they see The Spine too and maybe some others, but I’m probably not supposed to know that. But they are really good listeners and I guess I can talk. A lot. And maybe I’m not the nicest baby giraffe around either, but I’m trying. I’m trying to do better. It’s maybe good to talk to someone from outside. Someone I don’t see every day. Somebody not too quick to judge maybe.
Nov. 24
Dear Diary,
It’s been a few days but it’s been really busy. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving feast day for the humans. I asked Cook today if she needed help with anything and Arborus was there and he asked if I wanted to help gather the last of the carrots for the big dinner so we went out to the garden and he had this big basket and we pulled up the last of the carrots in the human-food garden, carefully, don’t rip off the tops or he’d have to go get the digging fork. But he didn’t have to. I was very careful. Cook was so pleased. But then she set Arborus to peeling this mountain of potatoes, not something I could help with, so I went and found Zer0. We played a game of hopscotch out on the back patio, then we played on the swings for a bit, then he took me up to the rehearsal room and we played some music together. Zer0 is so much fun and his laugh, it’s enough to send all those clouds back where they came from. You just have to laugh with him. It was a good day! I want to be more like him!
Nov. 25
Nice day. Everyone, everyone in the manor gathered in the great hall for dinner. Even all the robots were there, even though they don’t eat, or, most of them don’t. They even invited me! My own chair and everything. Right at the table. It was AWESOME!
Nov. 30
Today I saw the person I talk to…okay…okay…therapist… and they said I’d made so much progress this month. I can sleep at night now and I think I have the hang of figuring out when other people want to play and when they don’t and that I don’t need to irritate people to get attention. I think I get it now. And they said I don’t have to write in this diary any more if I didn’t want to. But you know what? I’ve kinda gotten used to it. I might just keep it going. At least for a little while longer