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“What do you think you’re doing?!”
“My goddamn job, now get out of the way! I gotta finish what we started!”
“Absolutely not.” Yuu stretched her arms wide, blocking the doorway and staring down her girlfriend. “You are not fit to fight yet! This is not something you can just bounce back, not even you!” They had been on it for hours now, arguing, discussing, fighting. By now, both their nerves were ragged, positively wretched.
“Hawks lost his wings. He’s still out there!”
“Because Hawks can still fight! Just because he can’t fly anymore and lost his fancy knives, doesn't mean he's defenceless. He still has his balance—”
“You’re saying I’m not as good as him?”
Rumi glared at her with those red eyes fiercely piercing into Yuu’s. She knew she’d make space if this wasn’t Rumi. Those red eyes she had fallen for, unafraid of anything.
“What I’m saying,” Yuu tried another tactic, despair oozing from her words, but she didn't care anymore. Her body hurt all around but she had been lucky, she knew that much, “is that I love you, I don’t care about Hawks. But I care about you. Please, Rumi… you go out there, you’re not only a liability but you will only make it worse. You have to rest and let it heal properly, please.”
Another staredown ensued, both unwilling to budge. However, there was only one way for Yuu to go. If she failed now, she risked not seeing Rumi again or even worse, Rumi unable to ever return to active duty. She knew a lost arm wouldn’t stop Miruko, she’d stay a hero and she’d go beyond everything, becoming a precedent. If anybody could do it, it was her. For this to happen though, she had to rest first, get used to her prosthetic and learn how to fight with that. Not following the doctors’ orders, she’d risk her whole career and Yuu knew that this would kill Miruko and Rumi — slowly, painfully so. And she wouldn’t stand for this.
Rumi knew she was right. Her gaze softened a bit, unused to Yuu’s emotional outburst. The last few days had been hard for everybody but especially for them. They weren’t used to relying on each other in such a way, that was the beauty of their relationship. They could raise each other up, but never had they had to keep each other from drowning in pain, trauma and grief. Maybe they had been lucky so far and now some higher power had decided to give them a long-overdue reality check. Now it was too late, things could not be undone.
Everybody had things to regret. They all had things they wished they had said earlier to the people no longer with them, things they wished they had done before that dreadful day. Yuu’s own guilty conscience was nagging her every single night, keeping her from sleep, no matter how many times she tossed on her bed or how much she clung to Rumi. Nothing could ease the heavy feeling in her heart that she lived and others didn’t, that she lost to Gigantomachia and others died because of her failure.
An arm found its way around her middle, hand resting on Yuu’s back as Rumi buried her face in the nape of her neck. There was no need for words as they stood like this, breathing together and calming down again.
In a world that didn’t want them, they had to at least want each other.
They wouldn’t be of any use if they didn’t stand together.
“I’ll go,” Yuu finally said, barely a murmur but she knew Rumi would pick it up. “I’ll fill in for you.”
“Your neck, Yuu,” Rumi immediately cautioned, unable to lean back with Yuu’s arm around her as well. “You can’t take off the brace yet.”
“I don’t have to. Look, I won’t have to be impossibly fast or very flexible, my strength is my size. The brace won’t be a big issue. If I fill in for you, you’ll be updated and you’ll be able to rest properly.” She wasn’t sure if she was talking sense, if her justification was good enough. “Just wait and I’ll make you proud, I promise. I can be the hero people need.”
For a moment she thought she’d earn a slap for that. She probably would have if they had been in any better shape. Instead, Rumi inhaled sharply, tensing considerably before releasing her breath.
“I’m always proud of you, silly. If you want to be a better hero, I’ll be even prouder, but you don’t have to do this to prove anything. And if this is about Midnight, then—”
“Don’t.”
Yuu’s interjection came harshly, but she didn’t want to think of her now. There was nothing they could do to reverse Midnight’s death, nor anybody else’s.
“She knew the risks, Yuu. It was her decision and if you want to honour her memory, you shouldn’t beat yourself up about it. You two happened to fight in the same area, your job was protecting the people as well as the students. You both did it, don’t insult her achievement now.”
Hearing it from somebody else nearly had her heart bursting from pain and she would have liked nothing more than to simply succumb to the cold clamouring at her chest like a wild animal swiping for the bird caged inside.
“The best thing we can do is go forward and make sure the people she died for are safe. This is the time to decide if we’re real heroes.”
Yuu stilled at those words. More often than not people had accused her of only being a hero for the fame and the attention, she had been called horrible names despite making it into the top 30 as one of the few women there. She had watched a lot of colleagues resign due to pressure and other unspoken things. But she was still here. Not even once had she thought about leaving, about not helping.
Just as she opened her mouth to respond, she felt Rumi swaying a little, remembering the amount of medication she had to take every day. It was a wonder she had been able to stand up for so long.
“You have to sit down, bunny,” Yuu relented quietly, leading them into the bedroom and sitting them both down. “By the way, were you planning on going to work in my shirt?”
“It’s a very comfy shirt. I also like that it stretches.”
She shot her girlfriend an unimpressed look. Of course, she’d say something like that.
“Also, it’s no longer work or a job, it’s a calling now. Without the Commission, there is no way we’ll be paid. And I literally got a call today.”
Yuu’s eyes narrowed at that. “Who called you?”
“Endeavour, of course,” Rumi grumbled. “The geezer is still fit and kicking, running around with Hawks… while I have to sit at home.”
“Is that why you were so… set on going?”
The following silence spoke volumes and Yuu groaned, gently pushing Rumi back on her back. When she leant over her, she took a second to admire the view. Both of them still looked pretty banged up from the raid, like absolute messes. The shorter hair on Rumi still took a bit getting used to for them, however, they were alive. That mattered the most. They had their bruises, their scars and missing limbs to remember their failures, their previous fights, but they were here and could comfort each other.
“I’ll have a call with Jeanist when you’re asleep and will tell him that I’ll come with them. If they want to or not, I don’t care. And when you’re able to, you’ll join, too. You’ll show them all what you’re made of.”
“Mhmm, you know how to talk dirty to me,” Rumi murmured, rapidly getting sleepier by the minute as she crawled to the top of the bed. Yuu stood up to tug her in, making sure she was comfortable and wouldn’t wake up with more pain.
“You know it. If you actually want to change your hero outfit to my shirt, I won’t protest by the way. You’re looking good.” Yuu smiled weakly before pressing a gentle kiss on Rumi’s forehead. “Sleep well, bunny…”
She didn’t get a reply anymore, exhaustion had claimed Rumi already. Now she only had to call Jeanist, getting a regrouping point and time for her to join the hunt. Yuu didn’t know much about what they were up to, but she knew they were out there every day, looking for the League, Shigaraki, All for One, a future for them all.
Ignoring the little shake of her hands when she dialled the number, she held the phone up to her ear: “Mt. Lady reports for duty. Tell me how I can help you guys.”