Chapter Text
Gaon liked to think that he really put an effort into being an easy going person. That he was calm, collected and not one to panic when things got strange. And sometimes, no matter his good intention it just didn't go that way.
It perhaps starts with the nickname baby deer, which also means that it was a bit of a joke. Gaon didn't like it from the start, but was also too frustrated and out of his element to say anything. Rich people made him nervous, parties made him uncomfortable and Yohan dutifully doting on him made his heart race. Gaon didn't even think about it again until he would call it, too late.
And thus, the best and worst day of Kim Gaon's life happens. Without even giving him a hint so before hand.
"Darling, you'll be my date to the event again, won't you?" It probably could have just been an outfielder tease coming out of Kang Yohan's mouth, but had also been on camera. Like right in front of a reporter crew after Yohan had been asked about who his next date would be, public. Gaon could have jumped out of his own skin as eyes focused on him.
His mouth feel too dry. The phrase being thrown under the bus came to mind. Gaon was somewhat angry about whatever test this was. Yohan was so mean to him! And after Gaon had started to feed him properly too. The nerve. Yohan was worse then that cat who received love and only scratched in return. Gaon should have had less expectations of him. Or perhaps held his heart a little tighter to his chest.
"I'll have to pass, sir." Gaon said back coolly, not giving an inch. He wasn't this man's date, his side piece or his lover. Gaon was his own person and the rumors that were about to start of him sleeping with his boss were already getting on his nerves. They hadn't even kissed! Yohan had barely shown a spark of interest in kissing him! The only time that it had felt like it might move in the way was when Yohan had him pinned to a wall and Gaon had long since surmised that the older man was just a fan of the power of it. Life wasn't fair.
If Yohan had kissed him any time before this, Gaon would have been able to smile. Had Kang Yohan made a damn move on him, Kim Gaon would have pathetically dropped to his knees for the man. And yet here was the audacity of the situation. This was clearly a joke, a play on what Yohan had obviously realized. Gaon got it loud and clear. His chest burned and he was uncomfortable to be so public with it, but Gaon now understood.
Kang Yohan was way out of his league. Far enough that the older man would make jokes about Gaon being his date to parties. Gaon could have broke down and cried on the spot.
Yohan frowned at him and tensed, like he was unsure why he would be refused. People around them giggled, and it all felt very much like a joke. Gaon hated it. He wanted to cry. He- okay he'd refused to go home to the mansion today and head to his apartment instead. They clearly needed some time apart. Gaon clearly needed to get his life together and not seem so pathetic.
And it's not a break up. They weren't together to begin with. So it's just not a break up. Gaon is simply getting away because he felt the teasing hard to stand. He barely told people he was gay, though he didn't avoid it. Yohan didn't have to go and make jokes about them being on dates.
He just bowed politely and retreated from the camera, faster then he ever had before. Yohan made a move to come after him, but was at a disadvantage to be trapped with people that still wanted the stupid interview. It helped Gaon run. At least the crowd of reporters was good for something.
Well, most of the escape was a very brisk walk. He didn't portray any emotions on the outside. He couldn't as he didn't want to cause a scene or more likely, a backlash problem for Yohan. He also didn't go back to his own office as it would have been too easy to find him. Not that he believed that Yohan would look for him after that. No, instead he calmly walked two flights on stare downward and then hide in a stall in the women's bathroom.
Bold choice, one would think, but Gaon was privileged enough to know that no women worked on this floor and the chances of one catching him were very slim. That and Yohan was more then likely uncaring or above such knowledge of the building. Even then, he might earn some pity from his tear soaked face as he sobbed as quietly as he could, if caught. Why did Yohan do that? Call him a sweet nickname and then run over his heart? Did human emotions really mean nothing to that man? Gaon was so upset.
It wasn't okay for that man to tease him like that on camera. To taunt or play with Gaon's life like he was a doll dangling on a string. Kang Yohan was dark, attractive and all Gaon had ever wanted, yet he was horrible. Unlearning and uncaring about human emotions. Communication was so far not his strong suit that it was better to talk to a wall. You'd get more answers from a wall too. Gaon hated that he was so in love. He'd forgive that horrible man in the end too, but right now Gaon just wanted time to cry about it. His life had been so much easier last year. And yet so empty.
It took him an hour to pull himself together and that was time he should have been working. God, Gaon felt really didn't fit into this world at all. He didn't like stabbing people, in the back or otherwise and that seemed to be all Yohan did. Was Gaon supposed to become like that? He didn't want to. He didn't want to change into the hopeless money greedy thing that so many others seemed to be. He wanted to help people, make a difference and maybe find someone to curl up against at night in the process.
Gaon sent an email from his phone explaining his absence to several people. Well, he'd actually said he was sick and hadn't been able to leave the bathroom for an hour. That was as good an excuse as any to dip out of the day. It was getting into late in the afternoon anyways, so of the older crowd left this early anyways. At 3 pm, a few senior members of the law office would close up and walk away if they had no more appointments. Today, Gaon would just take advantage of that fact.
He was on the ground floor of the building before Judge Oh had sent him a text back. It read that Yohan had been looking for him everywhere and quite frantically. She had that teasing and laughing tone that didn't hurt as much as Yohan's. He paused to send a quip back about being clearly irreplaceable as a target dummy. She didn't have to know that he was planning on calling in sick tomorrow as well. But he'd text her tomorrow and blame it on food poisoning. What a terrible person he was becoming in the end. A liar, who ran away from his problems.
Yohan called him right after he sent the text and he let it ring, walking out towards the road. He'd been planning on calling a taxi, but his phone kept ringing and he didn't want to decline. He wanted Yohan to sit there and think about the things he'd done for a single moment in his life. A punishment as you will. The call came to an end and then started again.
Gaon tried to flag down a taxi, without much success. They didn't come close these days, because they'd all been given a hard time after the bomb. If they hadn't had all proper paperwork and were able to identify clients driven in and out of the court building, they'd been fined. In result most cases, drivers weren't going to go anywhere near that place for a good long while. Over the phone you could offer double fair or a large tip and then they'd do it, but he'd have to call them.
Yohan called for what was now the fourth time. He'd now texted too and the older man had never texted him before. Ever. Maybe he'd leaned his lesson and wouldn't make fun of Gaon's sexuality or take advantage that Gaon was trying to keep this job?
Stop being a brat!
That message really said that clear as day one his phone. Gaon looked at it and gritted his teeth. Nope, this man would never learn. He wanted to forward the message to the HR department, but knew he'd never do that as it would affect Yohan's reputation. That was still a rude message though, so Gaon did what he did best in the wake of rude and pushy men; he ignored it.