Work Text:
To My Loyal Elves,
I am so very sorry to do this to you again, but it turns out that you can’t trust every cookie that is left out for you! Mrs. Claus keeps telling me, but unfortunately, I didn’t listen… again. So I am trapped in a cookie trap that was set out by that rascal, Mr. Grinch. Please Loyal Elves, I beg of you. Come save me, otherwise, Christmas will be ruined.
Your friend, Santa
May groans out loud, trying to take off the prosthetic elf ears that Buck had brought to the “Super Secret Santa Session” that he had planned for the rest of the kids of the 118. Of course, despite the almost 10 year age gap between him and May, he was often lumped in with the rest of them. May thought it was hilarious, and started referring to him as her big brother, her stepbrother, and Bobby’s son to her friends whenever he was around. So when Harry, Chris, and Denny started begging Buck to play Dungeons and Dragons, he pulled the Big Brother Card to get her to join them. “Seriously, Buck? Cookie trap?”
“Hey, don’t knock it, little sister! They asked literally 4 days ago! I spent more time building a combat encounter and characters for the four of you than writing the quest prompt.”
“The four of us?” May stops tugging at her ears and stares at Buck.
“Yeah, the four of you… I am new enough to this that I need an extra set of eyes on everything.”
“Why didn’t you ask your husband?” The second the words are out of her mouth, she clamps her hands over her mouth, as Buck cackles.
“So they are married! I gotta tell Eds, this is great!” Buck caws as he pulls out his phone to text his best friend.
“You don’t know that! Your characters are in the dark!” May cries, reaching for the phone that Buck held over his head. The whole thing is funny, but she is a little stunned that she slipped that easily.
“Yeah, but now I can definitely spend an entire session flirting relentlessly to try and get Eddie to blush. It’s hilarious. And Bobby can’t say a word.”
Seeing her opening, she leaned in and said, “And is that the only reason you want to see him blush? Because it’s funny?” Seeing her older brother flail back in a chair that is a little too spindly for a 6 foot 2 man to be flailing in is well worth it, especially as she is able to steal his phone and erase the text he was sending, before locking it and sticking it in her back pocket.
Righting himself, Buck looks a little dejected, as he shrinks in his chair, “Okay, May, you can leave that one right the fuck alone. No need to tease me for this.”
“Come on, there isn’t anything wrong with it.” She sits down and slides the chair closer. “If we can’t use D&D as an excuse to flirt with our friends, what’s the point?”
“What’s wrong is that when the in-character flirting turns to character bleed because the personalities are pretty much the same. Carla told us to get a room yesterday! And last time I thought a man was flirting with me and the dude was straight? Didn’t go well. Besides, I'm just fine where I am. Why try to get more when you're already content with what you have?”
“First of all, I don’t think Eddie knows there are other options besides being wholly into women or all into dudes. He was so confused by your pride pin. But if that man is entirely heterosexual, I will eat my metal pride dice and swear off my distinguished bisexual ways.”
“Since when are you the distinguished one? I demand a recount!”
“That’s why I am the distinguished one, Buckley. Now, can we stop arguing so I can fix this letter from Santa and go over your notes before Santa’s little helpers get here?”
A laughing huff sounds, “Fine, little sister. Have it your way. But you are wearing the ears!”
“Yeah, and I’m stealing them for my group's next cosplay session. Now hand them over!”
“…you are just like your mother.”
