Archive of Our Own ^beta

“Do you want me to kiss you?” Yeonjun teases, grinning. “Get it out of the way?”

His teeth are so white and cute (fuck how can someone’s teeth be cute, Soobin knows he’s obvious about favoring Yeonjun, but he can’t help it, his stomach just keeps twisting when Yeonjun gets too close, or hell, just about any time he walks in the room lately).

Yeonjun leans down overtop him, pursing his lips, making a comically over exaggerated kissing face but —

Yeonjun’s teasing him. Soobin knows that he’s teasing him. Yeonjun was literally just making fun of how he hasn’t had his first kiss yet. He still can’t help it — the word tumbles out of his mouth anyway.

“Yes?” Too serious. He sounded too serious. His voice almost fucking cracked. He’s not giggling in the right way, and there’s no cameras around, no one to play it up for, so he’s really not supposed to —

Yeonjun opens his eyes. He blinks. He’s still leaning over Soobin, frozen in surprise. His face goes slack.

Soobin can’t fucking focus on fixing his expression or clarifying that it was a joke hyung, don’t be so serious. All he can think about is how Yeonjun just let out a breath and Soobin can feel it across his face. Yeonjun’s lips part slightly (so pink, so plump and soft looking, sometimes Soobin wonders while he’s in the shower if Yeonjun would ever —). Soobin may have forgotten how breathing works. Yeonjun’s eyelashes flutter as he blinks, his face strangely blank.

Yeonjun is hesitating too much, not responding to their playing like normal. Soobin opens his mouth, attempting to sit up from Yeonjun’s lap, starting to mumble his way through some excuse, but he’s pretty sure it’s making no sense, he just hears some words falling from his lips about how he’s just joking, he’s tired, he’s going to go to bed, when he feels a push to his shoulder. He ends up on his back, once again on Yeonjun’s lap.

They’re the only ones in the living room. Everyone else is in bed. The dorm is quiet. Peaceful even.

Soobin is staring up at Yeonjun again, muscles tense, not feeling peaceful in the slightest. Soobin can see the decision as it comes across Yeonjun’s face.

Yeonjun grins slowly, this time it’s a little softer, sweeter, but still a tease. “Soobin-ah, you want me to give you your first kiss?” He murmurs. A smirk is pulling across his lips.

Soobin feels hot, he can tell his face is flushing, his ears are burning. He brings his hands up to cover his face. He nods.

He feels Yeonjun’s soft hands wrap around his wrists, trying to pull his hands away. “I can’t kiss you with your face covered, Soobinie.” Yeonjun is still whispering. Normally they don’t care if the others hear them and walk in while they’re playing around but this feels — different for some reason. They’re both being so quiet.

Soobin lets Yeonjun move his hands. He knows that he’s beet red at this point. Another thing that’s weird. Why would he be so flustered about this? It’s just his hyung. They’re just playing around.

(If he’s being honest with himself, he knows why he’s being weird. Most other boys don’t go as far as to ask for a kiss from their hyung, whether or not they want to get their first kiss over with. Especially not after having dreams and thoughts about said hyung, like Soobin has, dreams that leave him hot and sticky and uncomfortable the next day, hesitant to look Yeonjun-hyung in the eye for a while. He’s also had thoughts like that while he’s in the shower that aren’t any better, just easier to clean up from. But that’s just puberty, right? All boys go through that phase.)

Both of their hands end up on Soobin’s stomach, Yeonjun moving one of his hands on the couch next to him to brace himself as he leans forward again, no silly smooching sounds this time. Soobin closes his eyes and feels himself tilt his chin up to meet Yeonjun. He can feel his blood thudding through his veins.

Instead of making contact with his own lips though, he feels Yeonjun’s lips brush against his nose. Soobin scrunches his nose in confusion, opening his eyes as he feels Yeonjun let out a little puff of laughter. Yeonjun is close. He’s still smiling. Soobin can mostly tell from his scrunched up eyes because he’s so close.

Yeonjun just looks so fond and it’s not fucking fair how much Soobin wants to be closer to him so Soobin presses his hands to the couch, leans up, turns his face, and — oh.

Yeonjun’s lips are just as soft as they look.

Soobin presses in closer, not really sure where to go from here, but knowing that the pressure just feels so good. His stomach is tense from holding himself halfway up, but excitement keep shooting up his spine and if he gets any more butterflies he thinks he might just throw up and that would be unfortunate because then he’d have to stop kissing his hyung.

He feels Yeonjun shift and his heart drops, thinking he is about to pull away, but instead he feels Yeonjun’s arm wrap around his waist, supporting him, and the other hand place on his shoulder. And yes that’s okay that’s fine, Soobin could stay here forever, dealing with the thrill of being touched while doing something he never thought he could actually do.

Yeonjun presses into the kiss lightly, sending another shock into Soobin’s overly sensitive body, then pulling back (no, no, please not yet), before pushing towards Soobin again, and opening his lips slightly, taking Soobin’s lower lip between his own. And oh, that makes sense.

Soobin takes the cue and begins moving. At first it’s a little awkward, the timing not quite right, but then it clicks and he learns not only to push, but follow and flow together with Yeonjun, both of them breathing carefully through their noses. A shaky exhale turns into a harsher inhale as they move together. They work their lips open and closed, Soobin even tries to pull Yeonjun’s lower lip between his own. The glide from that is glorious. The noise Yeonjun makes is even better.

Their shared breath is so warm.

Yeonjun’s lips feel slick and soft against Soobin’s, and Soobin’s body is on a new kind of high. At this point, his abs are burning from holding himself up. He tries to shift without separating their lips, not trying to get out of Yeonjun’s hold but needing to sit up and face him because the angle they’re working with isn’t quite right. As he moves though, Yeonjun drops his arms and he pulls back his face as much as he is able with the couch behind him and Soobin on his lap.

Soobin’s stomach drops. He finishes sitting up. His lips are tingling. He can feel the heat in his flushed face. He turns to look at Yeonjun.

Yeonjun is almost the same as always. Captivating. But sitting as close as he is, Soobin can see the added flush to his cheeks and how his lips are shiny and swollen. His lips are still slightly parted. He is breathing heavy. His gaze is on Soobin’s chest.

Soobin’s not dumb. He knows his hyung likes to baby him and give him a place to rest. A place where he doesn’t have to be the leader. He also knows that’s how this started. He knows that Yeonjun wanted to tease him first and then give him whatever he asked for.

He knows that Yeonjun was just trying to fluster him. He knows that Yeonjun wasn’t sincere.

But god, sometimes Soobin wishes that he was.

Soobin stares at Yeonjun, feeling slightly queasy. He really didn’t want this to be over. His body was on fire and he didn’t really understand (okay maybe he understood a little but he just had to take what he could get and if this was it then god fucking damn it he was going to run with it) but he wanted to keep going.

He starts leaning closer, his hand places itself on Yeonjun’s waist and for a second all he can think about is wow how tiny, yet strong, that delightful curve to his side, maybe hyung needed to eat more, they should go get fried chicken together soon — before Yeonjun looks up at him, making eye contact. He quirks an eyebrow.

Soobin freezes.

“Was that a good enough first kiss for you, Soobinnie?”

Soobin’s face and ears are on fire all over again. He flops forward into Yeonjun’s shoulder, hoping he can bury his face deep enough in his neck that he suffocates.

“Yes hyung.” He huffs out a breath. Yeonjun shivers, which is weird because Soobin feels like he might explode from heat at any second. He nuzzles harder into his hyung. Maybe he can sleep like this tonight. He doesn’t even want to know how late it is. They have schedules starting early in the morning that he doesn’t want to think about.

“Thank you for helping me. I feel better now that I know what to expect.” That sounds like a normal, heterosexual response to kissing a friend, right?

“Ah, you’re welcome Soobinnie. You know hyung is always happy to help our wonderful leader.” Yeonjun still sounds a little funny. Maybe he got choked up on something? Soobin could go get him some water, but that would require him leaving his hiding place in the nook of hyung’s neck. He’s not ready yet.

“Hyung is the best.” The room is so quiet he can hear the heater running.

“What if I need more practice though?” The words drop out of his own mouth, hitting the floor with every syllable. Soobin can somehow feel the impact of each word in his stomach.

Yeonjun slowly wraps his arms around Soobin, like he’s giving him time to move, like there is anywhere on earth Soobin would rather be right now.

“We can probably figure something out.”

Soobin smiles.