Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Often at this point in the evening Charlotte and Sidney would drift off to sleep, both satisfied after succumbing to their passion and snuggled in each other’s arms. But it was Sidney’s birthday, and he had every intention of enjoying every second of it. Not that Charlotte minded that one bit.

“I was thinking,” he spoke quietly, his mouth being so close to her ear, “next week the B&Bs will be empty. We could test all the mattresses; see if any of them need replacing.”

Giggling as he started nibbling on her earlobe, Charlotte reminded him of her plans for the week, “I’ll be too busy putting the final touches on our wedding. But if you want to test the beds on your own, you’re welcome to.”

Not deterred, Sidney began cascading kisses down her neck, “I’d much rather test them with you." Reaching her collarbone he murmured seductively, "Maybe we should just call off the wedding and skip straight to the honeymoon.”

That suggestion was not received as he’d intended it, as Charlotte put her hand on the front of his shoulder and forced him away from her. “Do you not want to get married?!” she asked with a tone of alarm.

“What?” Sidney replayed his last comment and realized what he’d said. “No, Charlotte, of course I want to marry you.” He caressed her cheek with his hand, trusting she could see the truth in his eyes. “I love you, Charlotte. Entirely and completely.”

“If you’re having second thoughts about the wedding…” her voice remained laced with trepidation. “I know the case rates are scary high, but I do think what I’ve planned will be safe.”[1]

He huffed in mild exasperation. “You know that’s not what I’m saying, Charlotte. You’re the one who wanted to plan it all and surprise me.” He knew the date and location, but little else. Considering all the times he’d withheld plans from her, he knew turnabout was fair play, but as the date grew nearer he had to admit his frustration was increasing. “And I trust that you, of all people, have planned the most pandemic-safe wedding possible.”

She sighed, seeing how keeping the details of the wedding from him might have led Sidney to focus solely on the portion he was planning – their honeymoon. “I’m sorry, you’re right.” She slid her hand over his shoulder and down his bicep, so that she should bring him back to her for a kiss.

“Ow!” he exclaimed. “Some birthday present you insisted on,” he indicated the still tender spot where he’d gotten his Covid booster jab.[2] Of all days, why did Sanditon’s new drop-in clinic have to open on his birthday?! [3]

“Aww, poor Sidney,” Charlotte pouted in sympathy, her own injection site was sore too.[4] “Such a little needle causing you so much pain,” she leaned up to kiss his arm with exaggerated gentleness. “At least we didn’t have to queue for hours like they did in London.[5] Plus, we’re safer from Omicron now.”

“Esther was extra harsh with the needle,” he pouted more fully, wanting as many comforting kisses she was willing to bestow upon him.

“Esther was totally professional, as always, Sidney,” Charlotte countered. “Be glad she was the one to give you the injection; considering your considerable grousing this afternoon, I would have put it someplace other than your arm.”

He laughed uncomfortably her suggestion, knowing he should focus on the fact they’d both gotten a third dose even if it hadn't been an ideal way to spend his birthday.

Not wanting to dwell on the negative, he decided to shift back to their earlier conversation instead, “So, as I’ve sorted every detail of our honeymoon plans, I’ll have plenty of time to help you with whatever you need next week.”

“Nice try, Mr. Parker,” she shook her head slightly, caressing his arm with her fingertips. “I’ve arranged for you to be busy all week. You’ll be helping Tom with the renovations at Waterloo Crescent, for starters.[6] And Trafalgar House is off limits to you from Monday, so no sneak peaks of the wedding venue!” To emphasize her determination, she used her other hand to start tickling him just below his ribs, aware that it drove him wild.

It took him longer than necessary to get hold of her wrists and pin them back on the pillow by her head. Rising above her in victory, he made sure she could feel his desire for her on her thigh. “Why am I suddenly worried I’ll see very little of you in the coming days, Ms. Heywood?”

“During the days, perhaps,” Charlotte trailed a foot up Sidney’s calf, since he had her hands immobilized, “but the evenings are reserved for us.”

“They’d better be,” he released her wrists and brought a hand to her cheek. “Much as I’m looking forward to making love to Charlotte Parker in eight days’ time, I’d miss Charlotte Heywood’s company too much between now and then.” He kissed her other cheek softly before adding, “I’m especially anxious to silence the comments every time a Jane Austen fan visits Sanditon.”

Charlotte’s eyes dropped. Seeing his bare chest in front of her should eliminate any negative thoughts, but she knew he was correct. Anytime he introduced himself to a guest at the hotel or one of the B&Bs as Sidney Parker, then her as his fiancée Charlotte Heywood, the Austen fans would always find a way to pull her aside for a quiet word of warning about women named Eliza. It was maddening!

Sidney sensed her mind was spinning, so he made eye contact with her again. “You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved, and the only woman I ever will love.” He waited until she nodded, to indicate that she’d heard him and believed him. How could she not, when he looked at her like that.

His main grievance was with the other sort of extremist Sanditon fans – the ones who read too many explicit fanfics and saw him as a sex god to be ogled and/or fondled. He was thankful that Charlotte’s presence usually kept those women at bay. Emphasis on usually. Each time they had one of those encounters, he was more determined than ever to show Charlotte she was all he’d ever wanted. Exactly as he intended to do a few more times tonight.

Having learned a thing or two from the stories he had a love/hate relationship with, Sidney’s next move was to kiss his way down her body. Charlotte realized almost instantly that he was about to give her a gift on his birthday. She let herself relax, surrendering to her fiancé’s devotion to her. They lost themselves in each other again, confident in the knowledge that she would soon be Charlotte Parker, a character Jane Austen never got the chance to write about.

❤️ 

[1] The U.K. had their highest single-day Covid case rate of the pandemic yesterday - https://www.joe.co.uk/news/the-uk-just-recorded-the-highest-number-of-new-covid-infections-since-the-pandemic-began-306557

[2] Sidney got his two doses of AstraZeneca before QA began. Charlotte insisted he get a Pfizer booster after reading that even Oxford vaccinologists are encouraging people to get an mRNA vaccine - https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-021-02853-4 (All three of Charlotte’s doses are Pfizer.)

[3] The U.K. just opened booster jabs up to those 30-40 on Monday, so I decided Sanditon would have a drop-in clinic today as an extra birthday pressie for Sidney! We’ll find out in future chapters what everyone else’s vaccination status is…

[4] The U.K. government shortened the length of time between second dose and booster jab to three months, so Charlotte’s (barely) eligible having had her second dose on Sept. 10th - https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/coronavirus-vaccination/coronavirus-booster-vaccine/

[5] More on the queues in London - https://www.latimes.com/world-nation/story/2021-12-13/long-queues-uk-covid-booster-shot-blitz-omicron

[6] In Austen’s original chapters about Sanditon she says that Waterloo Crescent (what viewers of S1 know as the Terrace) was a row of eight residences, No. 8 being called Corner House (see p. 8 in the 1925 Clarendon Press edition). In Chapter 34 of QA, Charlotte suggested they “knock down a few walls” and expand the B&B in Corner House into a small hotel.

Chapter Text

The feel of waking with Sidney’s arms wrapped around her was complete perfection. He liked to remind her that he knew this was their fate the moment they met, even if it took her until their second meeting a few weeks later to let her mind entertain such an eventuality. Their courtship had been necessarily old-fashioned, on account of the pandemic, and she wouldn’t change a second of it. By the time Sidney proposed at the end of September, they knew each other better than most couples did in such a short time – thanks in large part to the fact that they had to talk about how they felt rather than kissing away any fears they might have.

The first morning she’d awakened in this room, they’d been in exactly the same position, except that she’d still been fully clothed thanks to the fact that she’d fallen asleep before they could consummate their relationship.[1] Smiling at the memory, she looked at the lovely art gallery Sidney had surprised her with that night and thought again how fortunate she was to have been assigned his address during her work on the Census.

Her thoughts moved forward in time, to their first week as an engaged couple. The relentless rain in London meant they rarely ventured out of Bedford Place. Their only substantial excursion was to select Charlotte’s engagement ring. Sidney took her to the Burlington Arcade where his father had gotten his mother’s ring decades earlier. In fact, Sidney told her as they strolled hand in hand, Parker men had been buying jewelry for their wives here since the Regency Era. It was quite the tradition![2] While the shops had an impressive selection of modern designs, Charlotte veered to something else entirely. As she looked down at the vintage smoky quartz ring on her finger, she remained pleased with her choice; it was the same shade as Sidney’s eyes, so she’d have him with her even if they were apart.

Charlotte insisted that Sidney let her plan the wedding, both because it was traditionally the bride’s responsibility and because she so rarely managed to surprise him with anything. Well, that was not completely true, but her one big surprise during their courtship had backfired somewhat spectacularly.[3] And the wedding was not truly a surprise, despite Sidney’s frustration about not knowing more of the details. It would be on Friday afternoon at Trafalgar House, and they’d agreed even before the Omicron variant emerged to keep it to family and a couple close friends to make it as Covid-safe as possible.[4]

She had never considered a Christmas wedding before, but it seemed a sensible choice – the Parker family would be more relaxed and able to enjoy it if there were no calamities happening at the hotel or B&Bs. Mary agreed, saying they should give the staff time off to be with their families, fully paid as a thank you for all they’d done during 2021. Arthur and Diana also suggested it would be a good time to get some projects done at the various properties. They’d be meeting today to finalize what was happening where, when.

The only tiny regret through it all was that their first Christmas together was bereft of festive touches here at home. Since the Parkers always celebrated together at Trafalgar House, the large and impressive tree there 'saved' any of the siblings from needing to get and decorate their own. When Charlotte learned of that tradition (or so they called it) Sidney could see her face fall in disappointment. Her practical side knew there was no need to have a tree at home when they’d be leaving almost immediately after the wedding for their honeymoon, but she could not help feeling sad.

In an effort to cheer her, Sidney offered to string up oodles of fairy lights instead. She was gazing up at the ones connecting the four posts of their bed when she could sense Sidney awakening and stroked his arm to let him know she was already conscious.

“Mmm, good morning,” he nuzzled her shoulder. “Been awake long?”

“Not very,” she assured him. “And I had no wish to get up, I’m just so comfy.”

“What time is it?” his voice got clearer as he became more alert.

“Uh…” she tilted her head so she could see the clock on the bedside table. “A little before 8 o’clock.”

“Hmm…” he said as though he was concentrating. “Pretty sure that means it’s still my birthday. Somewhere in Canada or out in the Pacific.”

“I see,” she smirked even though he could not see it. “And as it’s still your birthday someplace…” she did not need to complete the sentence; they were on the same page. She rolled over in his arms, so they could both enjoy his birthday for a few more hours. Not that they needed an excuse to stay in bed. If they were late to the meeting, everyone would understand.

–––––

“Okay, okay,” Tom tried to get everyone’s attention. “Now that everyone has arrived,” he paused to send a scolding look to Sidney and Charlotte, “let’s get on with it.”

Diana began distributing packets to each person at the table – five Parkers, Charlotte, and James Stringer. Having been promoted to Chief Concierge at Trafalgar House, James now attended meetings of the Parker Family Properties management to provide a non-family opinion on decisions being made. Mary and Charlotte were also included, everyone acknowledging that the happenings in the company had a direct impact on their lives. The voting remained in the hands of the siblings, but Mary, Charlotte, and James collectively had a fifth vote to ensure there were no ties.

“Right,” Tom started to take them through the materials in the folder once they each had one. “Although the pandemic has wreaked havoc on the hospitality industry, our fourth quarter figures are looking better than expected and, even with Omicron, we’re poised to end the year on an upswing.”[5]

“Thanks to Charlotte’s suggestions,” Sidney said proudly. Tom had tried to resist the many Covid precautions Charlotte mentioned in the late summer and autumn, however she had accurately predicted that lots of travelers would select places to stay based on how safe they felt in them.

“Yes, yes,” Tom acknowledged. “We’ve tapped into a niche market that looks likely to last as long as this pandemic drags on. Thank you, Charlotte,” he bowed his head to her magnanimously.

Diana picked up on the affirmation, “The contactless check-in has been going swimmingly here in Trafalgar House, and I’m so looking forward to getting the digital locks installed in the B&Bs so we can use it in them too.”[6]

“The improved WiFi signal was a definite bonus, and the brochures about the upgraded amenities we’re getting in place over the holidays have been really well received,” James added. “Lots of return bookings made and our online reviews are pretty stellar.”

“Thank Sidney’s ‘corporate espionage’ for most of those ideas,” Charlotte did not want praise for something that was not her idea, even if she had been the one to voice the ideas in a meeting back in October having remembered a video chat she had with Sidney when he was in Glasgow over the summer. Flat screen televisions and a full-sized chair would soon grace every room in the B&Bs, even if that meant making doubles into singles to free up space.

“That takes us to the To Do List,” Tom drew their focus back to the papers they were holding. “Sidney and I will get the revamping of Waterloo Crescent underway on Monday, so we can both give the crew their instructions together,” there was a bit of a miffed tone that everyone ignored. “And Arthur will take over for Sidney between Christmas and New Years.”

“Plus I’ll see to the installation and testing of the new locks,” Arthur confirmed his other key task over the holidays. He smiled slyly at Diana, knowing they had an additional piece of related technology to test next week, but he refrained from saying anything about it.

To cover in case anyone noticed Arthur’s expression, Diana moved quickly to the next item on the list, “The steam cleaning of the carpets will begin as soon as the guests depart over the weekend. Personally, I cannot wait to start ripping up the ones in Hillier House. They’re so outdated!”[7]

“And we’ll assess the state of the painting, but only do some if necessary,” Mary added. “If it can wait until the weather’s warmer, so we can open the windows to help it dry, that would be better.” Normally Tom would want to throw a new coat of paint on regardless of other considerations, simply because he could. It might not seem like a great compromise on his part, but they were happy for each and every compromise he made.

As they returned their To Do Lists to their folders or scanned them with their phones, Charlotte took the opportunity to add one more reminder: “I wanted to thank you all in advance for everything you’re doing to help with the wedding. Especially helping me keep Sidney away from Trafalgar House until the ceremony,” she could feel him rolling his eyes next to her.

He leaned close to her ear and whispered in a less-than-innocent tone, “Don’t think I can be a good boy?” then gave her a tiny kiss on the cheek.

“Charlotte,” Mary pulled her attention away from Sidney. “Can you stay a little longer? I want to double check that we’ve got all the arrival details correct for your parents and siblings.”

“Certainly, Mary,” Charlotte agreed, ignoring Sidney's playfulness as she always endeavored to do when they were working.

“Tom,” Sidney addressed his older brother. “While they deal with that, how about we go to Corner House? I think the last guest was checking out today, so we can do a walk through to assess the paint.” Tom merely nodded in acknowledgement. He and Sidney had a different reason for going to Corner House this afternoon, as they both knew. Charlotte wasn’t the only one planning surprises this week.

To his fiancée, Sidney gave a goodbye kiss as the meeting officially ended, “Text me when you’re on your way home.”

“I will,” Charlotte had no idea how long her personal To Do List would take her to complete. “Love you.”

–––––

When Charlotte opened the front door later, Sidney was waiting. Not just generally waiting as he might on a typical day, he was directly in front of the door preventing her from entering. “Hello…?” she greeted and questioned him simultaneously.

“Hello,” he smiled his most charming smile. “You’re going to need this,” he held out his winter scarf.

“Did the heat go off?” she remained confused as she accepted the scarf from him and placed it around her neck.

His smile shifted into a smirk, “That’s not how you need to wear it.”

Charlotte’s eyes widened, thinking he had something amorously adventurous in mind. “Is that so?” she bit her lip in nervous flirtation.

“Ah, no, that wasn’t what I had in mind either,” Sidney realized where her mind had gone. “At least, not yet.” He took a step toward her to take the scarf back off her neck. “May I?” His next move was to slowly bring the scarf up in front of her face, indicating that he meant for it to be used as a blindfold.

“That works too, I suppose,” she teased in response. She may not know what Sidney had in mind for their evening, but she trusted him implicitly.

Once he felt the blindfold was secure, he took one of her hands and walked her inside, closing the door behind her. “Doing okay?” he wanted to make sure she was comfortable with his approach. They’d never asked each other to trust each other in this particular way before.

“I trust you, Sidney,” she squeezed his hand. “You must know that by now.”

“Just checking,” he brought her hand up to his lips and placed a kiss on the back. “I assure you, you’ll enjoy my surprise,” he put his free arm around her waist to escort her farther into the house.

Although Charlotte expected to turn and head toward the dining room, Sidney walked them straight ahead in the direction of the back garden where they’d had their first conversation. When she figured they were almost to it, he stopped her. “Wait one second,” he released her and moved to open the back door. “Okay, only a little farther,” he took her hand again and helped her across the threshold.

“I could have promised to keep my eyes closed, you know,” she remarked.

“The blindfold will make the reveal more dramatic,” Sidney explained, stopping her again and moving to step behind her. “Ready?”

“For anything,” she agreed with no hesitation.

When Sidney removed the scarf from her eyes, Charlotte’s gasp of delight made him the happiest guy on the planet. “Oh Sidney! You saved it!”

“I know how sad you were when you thought we’d have to kill the tree to make room for the builder’s skip at Waterloo Crescent,” Sidney would have marked that day as one of the lowest moments of their working relationship. And the first time he’d truly seen her cry out of sadness. Out of frustration or happiness, yes, but he’d been heartbroken to see her so sad.

“I never imagined,” she walked to the small Scots pine tree, seeing it was now in a massive pot and decked out with Christmas lights.[8] “Is it likely to survive? Surely it lost a lot of roots when it was dug up,” her practical nature would always see the less romantic aspects of the gesture too.

“The arborist has given me a full list of instructions for us to follow,” Sidney walked to pick it up from the table. “She gives the tree a 50-50 chance of making it until we’re able to replant it in the spring.”

“Better than no chance,” Charlotte looked at him hopefully, brushing a couple tears from her cheeks. “Thank you for doing this, Sidney. For me and the tree,” she stepped into his arms to give him a hug.

“I’d do anything for you, Charlotte,” he hugged her tightly. “You must know that by now,” he repeated her earlier comment.

“I do,” she nestled into him. “And I’m thinking,” he could some the mischief in her voice, “perhaps you’ll let me use your scarf tonight to help me thank you more fully, Mr. Parker.”

“I’m sure that could be arranged, Ms. Heywood,” he chuckled and kissed the top of her head. “But first, I’ve cooked us dinner. We must keep up our strength, after all.” He released her from the hug and offered her his arm to walk her back inside and out of the chilly night air.

–––––

Sidney made Thai food for dinner, it being what they’d enjoyed their first meal together back in June. “Today’s an anniversary of sorts for us, you know,” he said cryptically before taking a sip of wine.

“It is?” a furrow of confusion appeared on Charlotte’s brow. “Of what?” she had no idea what he was referring to.

“Six months ago today,” he set his glass down, “I finally reached my breaking point and decided to head to London to search for you.”

“Ahh…” she said slowly in recognition. “So it’s an anniversary for you. Two days from now is an anniversary for us,” she corrected, amused because she could tell what his intent was in trying to turn the day into something special.

“But if I hadn’t been so desperate, we couldn’t have met again in London,” he leaned forward, not quite enough to kiss her but definitely hinting that he’d like to.

“So…” she inched toward him, “I suppose I should be really grateful that you can be such an impatient man, should I?”

Sidney grinned, his face now a breath away from hers. He didn’t speak, letting his eyes tell her what he was thinking.

“Well then,” Charlotte placed a hand on his collar. “Guess I need to thank you for that… right after I thank you for the Christmas tree,” she tugged him to her.

“My thoughts exactly,” he whispered before they shared a slow and sensual kiss.

The dessert he’d made would need to wait, becoming a midnight snack during an intermission of their romantic activities. Charlotte was the one who offered to fetch it and, in the process, she paused for a few moments to admire the Christmas tree Sidney had saved and decorated for her. Much as she enjoyed their physical relationship, it was the thoughtful gestures he made outside the bedroom that showed her how much he loved her. And she knew they both looked forward expressing that love in all manner of ways for the rest of their lives.

🎄 

[1] Chapter 39 of QA.

[2] The Burlington Arcade opened in 1819 - http://www.burlingtonarcade.com/

[3] Chapters 17 & 18 of QA.

[4] My initial notes for the story would have included several more characters, but the fact that the U.K. never managed to bring the infection rate down after lifting restrictions in July resulted in a small guest list.

[5] Had Charlotte and Sidney’s wedding not taken over Trafalgar House for the next week, the rise in Omicron cases in the U.K. would have likely resulted in the cancellation of any Christmas parties that would have been booked - https://www.cnn.com/2021/12/17/business/uk-business-omicron/index.html

[6] Hilton has contactless check-in now (and I'm sure they're not unique) - https://www.hospitalitynet.org/news/4107081.html

[7] All the Parker Family Properties were mentioned in Jane Austen’s fragment. Hillier House is the name I gave to the Parkers’ ancestral home in QA (named for the family that was living there in Austen’s chapters). Corner House is part of Waterloo Crescent and the other properties that have not been mentioned yet in this story are Bellevue Cottage, Fisherman’s Village, and Prospect House.

[8] The only pine tree native to Britain - https://www.woodlandtrust.org.uk/trees-woods-and-wildlife/british-trees/a-z-of-british-trees/scots-pine/

Chapter Text

Bright and early Saturday morning the Parkers, and a certain soon-to-be Parker, were all extremely busy. The final guests were checking out today, and everything needed to shift into cleaning mode before the staff started on their Christmas holidays on Monday.

Approaching the collective To Do List with a divide-and-conquer mentality, each supervised and assisted with the work that needed to be done at a single Parker Family Properties location. Mary was at Prospect House, Tom and the children were at Fisherman’s Village, Charlotte was at Bellevue Cottage, and Diana was gleefully ripping up the carpets at Hillier House.[1]

Sidney met with the construction foreman at Corner House, which on Monday would start to be transformed into the Waterloo Crescent Hotel at Charlotte’s suggestion. They still had tenants in a few of the apartments, so the merging of them could not all be done at once. Luckily those tenants only spent time in Sanditon during the summer and would not be disturbed by the construction in the coming months.

Arthur remained on duty at Trafalgar House, working on the secret project he and Diana were gifting Charlotte and Sidney for their wedding. Mostly Charlotte, honestly, since it was designed to ease her life in Sanditon more than anyone else’s. He was on the verge of completion when the front desk buzzed him in the back office to let him know that the inspiration for the gift had arrived.

“Alison!” he greeted his future sibling warmly as he walked out to the lobby. “You’re early,” they exchanged faux air kisses through their masks, it being their version of a Covid-safe greeting established during the last few months.

“So I am,” she admitted, leaning on a rather large suitcase filled with everything she’d need for her Maid of Honour duties. “Sidney needed my help with something while Charlotte’s otherwise occupied. And, having finished with that, I figured I’d see how our project is going.”

“It’s not quite done,” Arthur made sure not to say what it was while others were around to hear them. “I’m capitalizing on the fact that everyone’s out to try to finish it up. You can keep me company while I do, if you like.”

“Deal!” Alison was excited that Arthur and Diana were making her suggestion a reality. “Let me bring my suitcase to my room and I’ll join you in the office.”

–––––

When Arthur was called away by a guest needing assistance, Alison made her way to the bistro to get herself something for lunch. Along with assisting her two favorite Parker brothers, she knew she needed to make herself available to Charlotte whose stress level was bound to rise along with the rising Covid infection rate.[2] Ensconced at a corner table to be able to observe comings and goings, Alison got out her phone to do some texting…

Alison: I have arrived!

Charlotte: Already? I wasn’t expecting you until the party.

Alison: Arriving early is permitted, isn’t it? You’re only supposed to go bridezilla if people are late.

Charlotte: You think I’m being a bridezilla?? 😳

Alison: No, of course not. 🙄

Alison: If anyone’s able to pull off a perfect wedding during a pandemic, it’s you. 😘 

The three dots appeared and disappeared a few times, as Charlotte took time to formulate her response. She’d had a small freak out on Thursday when the Queen cancelled her traditional pre-Christmas lunch, and Alison needed to remind her sister that the woman was nearly 100 (plus who would want to spend time with Prince Andrew these days, anyway?!).[3] Alison finished off a few more bites of her gnocchi waiting for her sister’s next message to appear.

Charlotte: Thank you, Alison. ❤️ 

Alison: What were you going to say?

Charlotte: What do you mean?

Alison: It doesn’t take that long to type ‘Thank you, Alison.’

Alison: Has someone called you a bridezilla? Like, for real??

Charlotte: No… Sidney’s miffed with me for not sharing more details, that’s all.

Alison: Miffed? Mr. How-Many-Ways-Can-I-Surprise-Charlotte-Today is miffed with YOU?

Alison: Sure he’s not just enjoying trying to get the details out of you?

Charlotte: Umm, well…

Alison could picture her sister pondering the possibility. Having watched Charlotte’s side of the courtship over the summer, Alison knew all too well how easy it was for the couple to misunderstand each other when no negativity was truly intended on either side. When Charlotte remained silent, Alison drew a conclusion of her own.

Alison: If either of you was less than fully clothed when he said whatever it was he said, then he was totally being flirtatious not critical.

It took a few more moments for Charlotte to respond, never liking to admit she was wrong about something… especially to Alison.

Charlotte: You may have a point.

Alison: 🙌 

Alison: And THIS is why I’m your Maid of Honour! #Sidlotte

Being a devoted sister who was also devoted to making sure this wedding wasn’t derailed by anything – even the bride & groom – Alison sent her next message to her future brother-in-law…

Alison: Took care of everything at your place!

Alison: Am now at TH enjoying lunch – your treat! 😜 

Sidney: Thank you, Alison. Have all the lunch you like; I appreciate the assist.

Alison: Need help with anything else? My afternoon is open…

Sidney: No, everything’s under control.

Alison: Okay, if you say so.

Sidney: Why? Has Charlotte said otherwise?

Alison: Nope. Just reminding you that I’m here to help you two avoid any unnecessary bumps in the road, that’s all. 😘 

Sidney: And we’re grateful, Alison. Really.

Alison: #Sidlotte

Sidney: Indeed. ❤️ 

Satisfied that Charlotte’s wobble was merely that, Alison refrained from messaging either half of the happy couple again during lunch. She’d keep a close eye on them this week, and hopefully the secret projects she was working on would put smiles on their faces. If there was one thing Alison was certain of, it was the fact that Charlotte’s last name needed to be Parker by Christmas!

–––––

After a long day of work, the Parker family + two Heywoods gathered for a celebration of Sidney’s birthday. He’d insisted it wasn’t necessary, having celebrated plenty with Charlotte already, but the children really wanted the chance to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to him. They’d always done so in the past, and it didn’t seem right not to celebrate a family birthday together.

The half dozen patio heaters Diana had suggested they purchase for the bistro terrace were keeping everyone sufficiently warm.[4] Never one to miss an opportunity for closeness, Sidney also made sure to bring along a blanket to snuggle underneath with Charlotte if the opportunity presented itself.

“Glad you went with the electric ones,” Alison remarked to the cluster of Parkers she was sitting near. “Sanditon doesn’t have the best record when it comes to fire safety,” she joked dryly about the fire that the town faced more than 200 years before.[5]

“They’ve been a godsend,” Tom conceded. As with most of the Covid-related recommendations people made, he had resisted the idea that heating the terrace was necessary to extend outdoor dining into the cold winter months. “I hadn’t thought so many people would still be refusing to eat inside this far into the pandemic.”[6]

Charlotte and Mary came outside carrying trays holding mugs of hot cocoa for everyone, plus marshmallows and other things to add in. When the children didn’t immediately run over to get theirs, Sidney got suspicious.

“What are Arthur and the children doing?” Sidney could see them huddled together, away from everyone else.

“Beta reading my fanfic,” Alison explained as she added a splash of Bailey’s to her cocoa. “We’re planning to give it to you and Charlotte tomorrow.”

“You really wrote one?” he knew she’d threatened to do so at their engagement party, however he was surprised she actually followed through on it.

“Why wouldn’t I?” she grinned, taking a sip of her drink. “I’m sure you’ll love it, Uncle Sidney.”

He rolled his eyes. As she reminded him this afternoon, Alison was the most devoted of Sidlotte shippers and he would never not be grateful for her support while he had been courting her sister. “Did you manage to keep it rated G?” he asked with more than a hint of worry.

“Absolutely,” she continued grinning. “Words with double meanings are my jam!” with a wink, she went to join her co-authors to see what Arthur thought of the story. Moments later the children hurried over to claim their mugs of cocoa.

Charlotte made her way over to her fiancé, handing him his mug. He wrapped an arm around her when she sat down. “Did you know your sister followed through on her idea of writing us a fanfic?”

“Yep,” she smiled, nonplussed. “She’s been down several weekends in a row to meet with the children about it.”

“She has?!” Sidney was shocked. “Why didn’t I know about this?”

Charlotte looked at him to assess his expression. Squinting one eye as if to inspect him, she answered, “For someone who delights so in surprising people, you really aren’t used to anyone surprising you, are you?”

With an audible exhale Sidney brought Charlotte’s head to him with his hand so he could place a kiss on her temple. “No, I suppose I’m not. Will this be a nice surprise? Or should I brace myself for something scary?”

“We agreed on only nice surprises when we got engaged,” Charlotte sipped some cocoa. “I intend to stick to that promise.”

“As do I, Charlotte,” his fingers trailed through her hair gently as he too had a sip of his beverage.

“Alison did tell me something that you should probably be aware of,” she leaned back a bit to look at him again. “With respect to the story.”

“What’s that?”

“Well, she said the children are hoping that we’ll actually do whatever it is the story’s about with them,” she relayed the cryptic request. “That’s what tomorrow’s about. They want to give us the story and want us to act it out with them.”

“I guess that’s okay,” Sidney chuckled. “At least it means she will have kept it rated G.”

“Yes, she promised she did,” Charlotte moved to again rest her head on Sidney’s shoulder. They continued watching Alison, Arthur, and the children who were all now enjoying their cocoa and chatting in hushed tones about the draft of the story. Alison had her phone out and appeared to be tweaking the story, based on their reactions. After a few high fives and hugs, the group scattered to various areas of the party – Alison and the children going to fetch something to eat, while Arthur came to speak with Sidney and Charlotte.

“Done conspiring, are you, Arthur?” Sidney questioned his brother.

“About the story, yes,” Arthur pressed his lips together in an effort to hide something. “About your Christmas present, no.”

“My Christmas present?” Sidney asked for clarification.

“Yours and Charlotte’s,” Arthur smiled. “Alison gave me the idea, and we'll be beta testing it on Monday.”

“Beta testing, not reading?” Charlotte picked up on the terminology. “So not another story?”

“No. I’d humbly suggest you’ll appreciate it more than the story,” Arthur spoke cautiously. “But the story is adorable, so it’s tough to say which you’ll like better.”

“Definitely a week full of surprises,” Sidney sighed in resignation of that fact. Charlotte was right, he liked to be the one planning the surprises rather than being on the receiving end of them. Perhaps that was all part of Charlotte’s master strategy to keep him from doing too much conspiring in the future.

“And by the end of it, we’ll be married,” Charlotte reminded him of the most important aspect of the week.

“Mmm, yes. And then I’ll be in charge of the honeymoon,” he opted to kiss her passionately, not caring that his entire family was with them. Eventually he could hear the sound of spoons clinking on mugs, everyone attempting to get their attention.

When Sidney ended the kiss, he smirked at Charlotte. “Until later,” he whispered smugly.

“Time for a toast!” Tom announced. “A very Happy Birthday to Sidney!” he raised his mug.

“To many more!” added Diana.

“Hip Hip Hooray!” Alison laughed as she said it. The children adding their hips and hoorays to hers.

“Thank you, everyone,” Sidney graciously accepted their good wishes. “Thirty-six was a great age for me, but I’m looking forward to thirty-seven even more!” He hugged Charlotte to him with emphasis, while taking another sip of his rapidly cooling cocoa. The whipped cream Charlotte added to it had not helped much in keeping it warm, though it did give him an idea.

Whispering again in Charlotte’s ear, he asked if there was enough leftover that they could bring home with them. When she nodded silently, Sidney was sure that the transition from his birthday celebrations to their wedding week was going to be yet another memory to savor.

🎉 

[1] Fisherman’s Village is a set of cottages mentioned by Austen. In this universe, the Parkers rent them to artists, who may or may not live there year round. We’ll hear more about what Tom and the children are up to in Monday’s chapter.

[2] More than 10,000 newly confirmed cases of Omicron in the U.K., with more than 90,000 total new Covid cases today - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-59711474

[3] The Queen decided to cancel her pre-Xmas lunch - https://www.reuters.com/world/uk/queen-elizabeth-cancels-pre-christmas-lunch-with-family-palace-source-2021-12-16/

[4] Each heater can warm an area of about 300 sq. ft. - https://livingtheoutdoorlife.com/how-big-area-patio-heater-heat/

[5] In QA I established that certain events in Sanditon actually happened in Sanditon’s history.

[6] If today’s rumors are correct, indoor hospitality may be prohibited again in England after Christmas - https://news.sky.com/story/covid-19-officials-drawing-up-plans-for-two-week-post-christmas-lockdown-over-omicron-threat-reports-say-12498746

Chapter Text

When Sidney awoke on Sunday morning, he was disappointed to find he was alone in bed. Rolling over to see if the room was indeed empty, he saw that Charlotte had left him a note on her pillow:

Wedding Week – Day 1  

Alison & the children are in charge today!

You’ll find your requested attire in the bathroom…

Love you,

Charlotte ❤️ 

He begrudgingly got out of bed and made his way to the bathroom. There he found his swimsuit, some jeans, and a wooly jumper. His first thought was one of fright – it was December, surely Alison did not expect him to go sea bathing! Charlotte wouldn’t subject him to that, would she?

After taking care of essential morning tasks, he went downstairs in his robe rather than in the assigned clothing. He spotted two folded beach towels on the table near the door; perhaps Charlotte would be taking part in whatever was requiring him to wear a swimsuit? “Tell me she doesn’t expect me to go in the sea,” he addressed his fiancée grumpily as he approached the kitchen.

“Good morning, Sidney,” Charlotte calmly demonstrated a proper greeting. “Did you sleep well?”

Understanding she was reprimanding him, he adjusted the direction of his comments. “Yes, darling,” he said with false sugariness. “You were in my arms most of the night, so I slept wonderfully.” He gave her a quick kiss, refraining from pulling her into his arms on account of the knife in her hands that was currently segmenting an orange. “Better?” he raised his eyebrows, seeking approval.

“Much better,” she grinned. “Although I can understand your worries about Alison’s scheming with the children, we’re to meet them at the leisure centre, not the beach.”

Sidney exhaled in relief. “I wouldn’t put it past her, you know, to suggest Regency-style sea bathing… even in winter.” He reached for one of the orange slices, leaning his hip against the counter to settle in for a conversation.

“There’s no way she’d risk you catching a cold so close to the wedding,” Charlotte pointed out. “She remains the world’s #1 Sidlotte shipper and will do everything in her power to make sure we exchange vows on Friday.”

“Mmm, yes,” he nodded. “I’m in 100% agreement with her on that.” Reaching for a mug, he poured himself some coffee. Their morning routine was fairly standard – whoever was up first made the coffee and started preparing fruit or eggs or whatever else that person felt like eating, and the second person to the kitchen took out the needed plates, bowls, and cutlery. “You ready for coffee?”

“I am, but you’re not,” she gave him a distinct once over to indicate his robe was not standard breakfast attire. “Are you planning to go on our outing in that?”

“I didn’t want to put on the swimsuit until I was sure of our destination,” he admitted. “Of course,” he toyed with the sash holding his robe closed, “we could reschedule the outing and stay inside where it’s warm and cozy.”

Charlotte gave him an indulgent smile before shutting down his imagination, “No, we can’t. The children are so excited about today, and I refuse to disappoint them.”

Sidney gave her his trademark pout. “Will you make it up to me later?”

“Don’t I always?” she said with a teasing lilt. Setting the knife down so she could stand in front of him, she wrapped her arms around his waist. “In all seriousness, Sidney, Alison said the children are worried you won’t have as much time for them once we’re married. So today is really important to them. You need to promise you’ll play along. And yes, I’ll make it up to you if you are in anyway mortified doing whatever it is they have planned.”

Sidney took a few moments to process all that she’d said. He focused in on the most crucial piece of information first, “Nothing’s going to change with the children after we’re married.” He was a little stunned, and hurt, if they thought that.

“Not immediately,” Charlotte explained, “but when we have children of our own…” she let him complete the thought on his own.

“Oh, right,” if Alicia, Jenny, and Henry were jumping that far ahead then he could understand their worries. “As to the rest of your comment, should I expect to be mortified today?”

“I honestly have no idea,” Charlotte shrugged. “Except that every time I ask Alison for a hint of what the story’s about, she busts out in laughter.”

“Why am I not surprised?” He gave Charlotte a quick kiss before releasing her, “Okay, I’ll go get dressed. When is this humiliation set to take place?”

“We’re meeting them in about an hour,” Charlotte resumed her breakfast preparations.

“An hour?!” Sidney expressed dismay. “Were you planning to wake me?”

His fiancée shook her head lovingly, “I knew there was no need. You never sleep more than 15 minutes once I’m out of your arms. It’s an impossibility.” Her knowledge of his sleeping habits was one of countless ways she showed she loved him.

“Guess I’ll need to work on not being so predictable,” he smirked at her from the doorway, “or I’ll need to see to it you never leave our bed.” With wink, he headed back upstairs to get dressed for the day.

–––––

They met Alison and the children just inside the doors of the Sanditon Leisure Centre. All four were bouncing with glee the same way they’d done on the day Sidney proposed to Charlotte.

“We’re definitely in for trouble,” Sidney said to Charlotte quietly, glad to have his mask on so there was no chance anyone could read his lips.

“Nonsense, Sidney,” Charlotte scolded, loudly enough for everyone to hear. “I’m sure we’re going to have loads of fun, right?” Though she sounded confident, there was an undertone of worry that coincided with Sidney’s.

“Oh, we’re absolutely going to have fun,” Alison, they could tell, was smiling ear to ear behind her mask. “Here,” she handed Sidney a scroll with an aqua ribbon tied around it. “Don’t open it, but you are allowed to read the plot summary.”

Taking the scroll of what appeared to be a half dozen pieces of A4 paper, Sidney could see that much work had gone into this particular surprise. “Surface Tension,” he read aloud. “Modern AU – Uncle Sidney meets the girl of his dreams and is soon in over his head.” He turned the scroll further and could see the names Alison had tagged on the story. “You’re not in it?” he asked her.

“Nope,” she acknowledged. “I did have a more complex idea that would have included more characters, but the children were set on this precise plot.”

“I see,” Sidney looked at Alicia, Jenny, and Henry. “Taskmasters, were you?”

All three heads nodded proudly. “We all got to be older in the story too,” Henry sounded delighted to report this fact.

“Older, huh?” Charlotte joined in the conversation. “How much older?”

“I’m 12!” Henry answered with delight at the same time Alicia and Jenny said “17!” and “14!” respectively.

“Wow, that is much older,” Charlotte smiled at her sister, pleased to see Alison had made the children so happy in writing the story the way they wanted. That Henry wanted to be 12, so he’d be old enough to get a Covid vaccination, was not lost on any of the adults.[1]

“I don’t actually mention the ages in the story,” Alison explained, “but it was necessary for the plot.” She spoke earnestly, as though it had been a topic of much discussion with the children.

“Is it safe to assume that Aunt Charlotte is the girl of my dreams?” Sidney brought their attention back to the single sentence summary Alison put on the story.

“Of course!” Alicia answered this time. “You and Charlotte are #CoupleGoals,” she asserted.

“OTP, definitely,” Alison agreed.

“OTP?” Sidney could tell they were talking in hashtags and found himself curious about what they were saying.

“One True Pairing,” his fiancée filled him in. “It’s right up there with HEA for Happily Ever After.”

“Ah, I see,” Sidney nodded. “Okay, when do we get to read this masterpiece?”

“Soon!” Henry reached out a hand to his uncle then began tugging him down the hallway toward the pool. Charlotte, her sister, and the girls followed along, amused by the adorable sight of Sidney being all but dragged by his nephew.

Henry chose a quiet corner of the pool deck for them to claim, though Sidney suspected Alison had reserved it for them. Letting go of Sidney’s hand, Henry told his uncle precisely where to stand. Now that they were away from other patrons, they took off their masks and stuck them in their coat pockets.

Alicia and Jenny took it upon themselves to position Charlotte, while Alison took a clipboard out of her bag and handed it to her sister, “We have props!” she grinned.

“Very thorough,” Charlotte accepted the clipboard and could see a handwritten attendance sheet on it and along with a pencil attached by a string.

Once everyone had taken off their coats and dumped them in a pile, Alison began her direction. “All right,” she snatched the scroll back from Sidney. “I’ll be the narrator, and you all do as you’re told,” she made eye contact with the children too, not just Charlotte and Sidney.

As Alison read the opening scene of the story, which was set in Trafalgar House, Sidney and Charlotte both noted the smiles and whispers between the children as they claimed ownership of particular details in the conversation that story Sidney was having with their mother.

Even if he hadn’t read the summary, Sidney would have agreed with his story self that it was clear Mary was trying to set him up with Charlotte at this FloatFit Grow class the children were supposedly obsessed with.[2] He glanced at the pool and realized that’s why there were here – the children expected him to get on one of those rafts sitting precariously on the water’s surface.

Looking next at his fiancée, he could see that she’d come to the same conclusion. While he was less than pleased at the prospect of trying out this new mode of fitness class, she was smirking with amusement.

“Sidney?” Alison snapped her fingers in front of his face to get his attention. “You’re not supposed to be staring longingly at Charlotte yet,” she teased.

“Sorry,” Sidney was not sorry, “can’t help myself.” He winked at Charlotte.

With an eyeroll, Alison resumed her narration: “When he made his way onto the pool deck, he heard his nieces and nephew shouting Charlotte’s name as they scurried toward a girl who appeared to be nothing more than a teenager as she was not much taller than Alicia and had her hair in a ponytail just like his nieces did.”

Alicia stepped forward to add an elastic band to Charlotte’s hair while Alison showed Charlotte the page, the next dialogue belonging to her: “Children, slow down. No running on the deck, you know that.”

Jenny replied, knowing her lines in the story by heart. All the children, it turned out, had memorized their parts and it was up to Charlotte and Sidney to read their portions when Alison cued them by shoving the page in front of them. Once Charlotte and the Parkers were in the water, Alison simply narrated everything, her impersonation of Sidney being particularly good.

The only deviation from the plot was that the children, Charlotte, and Sidney all got in the pool in their swimsuits only, since their winter clothing was not suitable in the way the shorts and t-shirts in the story were. Alison may have overestimated Charlotte’s comfort on the floating rafts, but she accurately predicted Sidney’s inability to “mount” his raft and “stay erect” when on it.

Alicia, Jenny, and Henry were bubbling with happiness about the entire experience. They obviously loved the story and adored their Aunt Alison for writing it with/for them. Realizing they had created a special memory with their Uncle Sidney and Aunt Charlotte was also worth any embarrassment Sidney might have felt while trying to play along.

When all was said and done, and they were ready to depart the leisure centre, Sidney suggested they all go to his and Charlotte’s house for lunch, Christmas cookies, and cocoa before Alison returned them to their parents at Trafalgar House.[3] Text messages were exchanged to update Tom and Mary of the changed itinerary, and all six enjoyed an extended afternoon of family fun together.

–––––

Later that evening, Charlotte and Sidney were snuggled up on the sofa under Sidney’s favorite, though threadbare, blanket, discussing the children’s gift.

“I don’t blush that much, do I?” Charlotte questioned her fiancé.

“You did when we met,” Sidney twirled a lock of her hair around his index finger. “I used to make it a point to try to get you to blush; I love your blush.”

“Hmm, guess I should start doing it more often, then,” her fingertips trailed across the stubble on his chin. “The looks on their faces when you fell off that platform were beyond precious.”

“They did seem quite pleased with my inability to balance on that contraption as well as they can,” he agreed. “But today's attempt was enough for me.”

“Not going to be signing up for a FloatFit class come the new year, huh?”

“Definitely not,” he chuckled lightly. “I’ll let Mary know that I can take them to their class, though. And we’ll have to make a point of having the children over more regularly too.”

“I’d love that,” Charlotte snuggled into him more. “They’ve been so good about letting me share their Uncle Sidney, so I'll need to share my husband Sidney in return.”

“It never occurred to me how much they’d picked up on the stress between me and Tom,” Sidney sighed as he spoke. “Or how often I let my frustrations loose on the punching bag.”

“I didn’t even know you had a punching bag,” Charlotte stroked his chest comfortingly. She rarely went into the gym at Trafalgar House, as employees and guests needed to sign up to use it individually to minimize the Covid risk.

“Well, I haven’t had to use it since I met you,” he smiled at that realization. “Actually, not since I took my leave from Parker Family Properties and started working for the escort service.”

“Ah yes,” she shifted to use her fingernails on his jumper in a more tantalizing manner, “the escort service.”

“Hey, tease me all you want,” he replied with a hint of suggestion, “but that job got me my Covid jabs early and made it possible for me to flirt really well when you came to interview me about the Census.”

“As if you wouldn’t have flirted really well regardless, Mr. Parker,” she sat up to look him in the eye as she spoke.

“True, soon-to-be Mrs. Parker,” he leaned in for a kiss. “Very, very true.”

Eventually, he would scoop her up and carry her to their bedroom. Like the version of him in Alison’s story, real life Sidney was also determined to leave Charlotte “in no doubt about his physical attributes regardless of how much of a fool he’d made of himself in the water earlier.”

😘 

[1] Children under 12 are not yet eligible for Covid vaccinations in the U.K. (unless a preexisting condition requires one), so Henry is still too young (I’ve decided Alicia is 14 and Jenny is 12 in this universe) - https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/covid-19-vaccination-resources-for-children-and-young-people/covid-19-vaccination-a-guide-for-eligible-children-and-young-people-aged-12-to-17

[2] So you can see what FloatFit Grow is like - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GiWAD8mHr6E

[3] There will be loads of cocoa in this story because there was actually an extended discussion of it by Austen in her chapters about Sanditon (in Chapter 10, specifically). Arthur was fond of cocoa along with his buttered toast, while his sisters and Charlotte preferred tea.

Chapter Text

Sidney crumpled the note Charlotte had left for him this morning. He did not need to be reminded that he’d spend his entire day with Tom at Waterloo Crescent. Despite being enthused to see Charlotte’s idea of expanding Corner House into a hotel become a reality, he wished they could oversee the project on their own, as a couple.

That was impractical, he knew, especially since a good portion of the demolition of walls and new electrical work was to happen while they were away on their honeymoon. The overarching attempt to make all decisions regarding Parker Family Properties group decisions also worked against him and Charlotte doing anything without input from his siblings, Mary, and James. If Tom was not allowed to do that, Sidney couldn’t be allowed to either.

When Charlotte stayed at Corner House in September, Sidney explained to her that the Parkers only made one of the eight townhomes into a B&B because they only saw the need for one. The rest were rented out as holiday homes, a trend that was actually damaging to many communities in England and Wales when they wound up becoming under-populated.[1]

Once the family voted to make the shift from a B&B to a small hotel, Arthur and Diana reached out to all of the tenants to discuss the plans. Sidney’s best friend, Babington, offered his services as an estate agent free of charge to help them find a new place and one took up the offer of renting a cottage in Fisherman’s Village instead. Tom and the children had cleared that cottage on Saturday, readying it for the move that would take place in another month.

There was no resistance from any of the tenants to relocating, only questions of when and where to. As such, the conversion would happen incrementally. Only Nos. 6-8 would be connected in this phase. Next year, assuming funds allowed, they’d connect Nos. 4 & 5. Then in 2023 they’d finish with Nos. 1-3.

Because Waterloo Crescent was located close to Trafalgar House, guests would be able to go to the bistro for breakfast, eliminating the need for a full kitchen or dining room within the new hotel. Arthur had dreams of adding a bakery in No. 4 and/or 5, but had not yet convinced enough of his siblings (nor Charlotte, Mary, and James) of the viability of such an enterprise.

The final unexpected blessing of the project was that meeting with the architect and builders had given Charlotte a job to do within Parker Family Properties that did not require her to interact with the public. Yes, she was still quite concerned about Covid, but the real strain for her was those pesky Sanditon fans. Much as she tried to laugh it off when one would warn her about women named Eliza, the relentlessness of it seemed inescapable at times. Sidney did not want her subjected to their supposed helpfulness more than necessary, so he suggested she take charge of the planning as a way of shielding her. The renovations were her idea, after all.

Now it was up to Sidney to keep his older brother from undoing all Charlotte’s work, trying to ensure that the schedule she agreed to with the builders would be on track by the time they returned from their honeymoon in January. Arthur would do the same next week while he was installing the new digital locks on the doors in Waterloo Terrace that needed them. Through it all, the thought that a grown man like Tom needed to essentially have a child minder caused Sidney daily headaches if he let it.

Hearing Tom prattle on about another splendid possibility that Sidney would invariably nix, he took a moment to check in with his fiancée so she could help him maintain his composure.

Sidney: How many Parkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Charlotte: Huh? 🤔 

Sidney: One – Tom holds it and expects the world to revolve around him.

Sidney: 😂 

Charlotte: #FunnyNotFunny

Charlotte: How are things going?

Sidney: Just as one would expect. 🙄

Charlotte: Poor Sidney. 🙁

Sidney: Tom realized I was texting. 😳 Guess I should pay attention lest he change something when I’m distracted.

Charlotte: Indeed!

Sidney: See you soon, I hope?

Charlotte: Yes, I shouldn’t be much longer. I’ll meet you there.

Sidney: You mean you’ll spring me from my captivity?

Charlotte: Okay, princess… 🙄

Sidney: Love you. ❤️ 

Charlotte: Love you, too, Sidney. ❤️ 

–––––

“Sidney surviving his day with Tom okay?” Mary asked as she reached for the cellotape. The Heywood sisters were helping wrap Christmas presents for the children who were upstairs playing some online game or another.

“Oh, he’s fine,” Charlotte set her phone face down when she finished texting him. “Tom’s making suggestions and Sidney’s saying no. Pretty standard stuff, really.”

Alison cut a length of ribbon to add to the gift Mary finished taping up. “Isn’t everything decided for Corner House? Or should I call it Waterloo Crescent?”

“Either works,” her sister replied. “We won’t be putting up new signage until it reopens, so you can use either name for now.”

“Oh my,” something dawned on Mary. “The confirmation paperwork about the logo design is still in my Inbox. Please don’t let me forget to send that before the wedding?” she asked Charlotte.

Picking her phone back up, Charlotte added it to her personal To Do List. “If the signage is delayed, it won’t be the end of the world.” She’d remind Mary nonetheless, if only to keep Mary from any additional stress over the holidays.

“Are we putting these gifts under the tree now or hiding them somewhere?” Alison tied the final bow.

“Under the tree is fine,” Mary began gathering the supplies to return them to the office. “Now we enter the try-to-guess-what’s-in-it phase of Christmas.”

“Our father used to find really oddly shaped boxes to wrap things in,” Alison recalled, bringing a smile to Charlotte’s face. “It always threw us off about what we’d be getting.”

“I could see Sidney trying something like that,” Charlotte admitted. “Anything to increase the level of surprise.”

“Speaking of gifts,” Alison stood and picked up a few packages to place under the tree. “I’ll go see if Arthur’s ready for me to test your pressie.” The grin on her face was more playful than sinister, so Charlotte let her leave without a response.

“She’s conspiring with the Parkers about another present for you?” Mary had heard all about the excursion to the leisure centre and thought the children’s story was delightful.

“All I know is it was Alison’s idea, but it’s Arthur and Diana’s present,” Charlotte shrugged. “I haven’t spoken to Diana about it at all, so there’s no telling what her role in it is. Sidney and I are just going with the flow, like we did yesterday.”

Mary was about to say something, but was interrupted by Alison’s return. “It works!” she exclaimed, running to Charlotte’s chair and grabbing her from behind for a massive hug. “It’s so perfect, and it works!!!”

“Umm… yay?” Charlotte patted her sister on her forearms and hoped whatever it was she and Sidney would be happy about it.

“Diana’s got to run a test too, but then we’ll be ready to present it to you,” Alison was positively abuzz.

“Diana’s still ripping up carpets at Hillier House,” Mary did not wish to dampen Alison’s enthusiasm, having much experience doing the same when Tom was similarly excited about something.

“No problem,” Alison dismissed the concern. “She can test it from there.”

“Test it from there?” Charlotte’s confusion increased, before she reminded herself not to try to figure out what the three future siblings were up to.

Arthur joined the ladies not long after Alison returned from checking on him. He was beaming, like a proud papa. “It’s officially a go!” he announced, knowing Alison would not have been able to resist telling Charlotte and Mary that the project was close to completion.

“Can we give it to them now?” Alison asked like she was five years old. “Can we? Can we?”

“For goodness sake,” Charlotte hadn’t seen Alison this hyped about something since she told her Sidney’s last name. “Arthur, since my sister’s let us know that whatever this gift is can be used remotely, shall we all head over to Corner House so you can show it to us?”

“Excellent idea!” he readily agreed.

As Charlotte got up and headed to the door she realized that they were leaving Mary behind, because of the children. “Do you mind, Mary?”

“Oh no, go on,” Mary waved her away. “You can fill me in later.” She started picking up the remaining gifts for the children to take them to the tree, while Alison, Arthur, and Charlotte got their coats and headed to Corner House.

–––––

Diana took a break from her fun at Hillier House to meet the rest of her siblings and the Heywood sisters for the big reveal. Although Arthur had the technical know how to create their surprise, he needed to do so in a way that wasn’t a detriment to her reservation system at the Parker Family Properties making her assistance instrumental to the scheme.

When Sidney had initially suggested the idea that he and Charlotte run one of the B&Bs, Diana reevaluated how they took their reservations for each location through their central system. She also needed to add in steps in the process for guests to enter their vaccination status. Then Alison made a suggestion about a month ago about a specific alteration that would make Charlotte and Sidney’s lives happier. It was both considerate and devious, and they just had to attempt it.

“Is there a family meeting happening that I wasn’t aware of?” Sidney gave Charlotte a kiss in welcome when she led the entourage into Corner House.

“Not quite,” Charlotte unbuttoned her coat. “We’re about to be told what our Christmas gift from Arthur and Diana is.”

“From me too,” Alison shuffled forward so her co-conspirators could get in far enough to shut the front door. “Should we go in there?” she tilted her head toward the breakfast room.

“Yes, that’ll do nicely,” Arthur agreed.

Sidney and Charlotte sat at one table, Arthur and Tom at another, and Alison and Diana at a third. Charlotte could tell from the expression on Tom’s face that he also had no idea what their gift was going to be.

“Right, okay, so we’ve modified the reservation system,” Arthur began with guarded optimism.

“Altered it?” Sidney asked the question he, Charlotte, and Tom were all thinking.

“We know how many problems you’ve been having with the overzealous Sanditon fans,” Diana got to the heart of the matter. “So we’ve come up with a way to filter them.”

“Filter?” Tom sounded worried. “What does that mean, exactly?”

“Well, you know,” Alison took over the conversation, “or, I suppose you may not know, Tom.” She needed to keep in mind who was in her audience at the moment. “At fan fiction sites, you can sort and filter stories based on whether they’re complete or their rating or whatever.”

“Alison suggested that we apply the same concept to the reservations,” Arthur took out his phone to pull up the app he’d modified. “We’ve put in a series of questions and, depending on their answers, they get tagged with a warning label.”

“What sort of questions are you asking them?” Sidney could guess, but wanted to hear the explanation.

“The first question asks if they’ve seen Sanditon or not,” Diana handed her phone to Charlotte so she could see the app herself. “If they say no, it ends there, but if they say yes…”

“Then we ask a series of questions to see how dangerous they might be to you,” Arthur finished his sister’s sentence.

“And the best part,” Alison was practically bursting to add one final touch, “if anyone named Eliza tries to reserve a room, the system will tell her she’s not welcome here!”

“What?!” Charlotte, Sidney, and Tom said in unison.

“Anyone named Eliza will be told were fully booked, and will be given a list of other places they can stay at instead,” Diana clarified.

“Alison’s initial suggestion included a few choice words that we toned down a bit,” Arthur looked out the corner of his eye at Alison. “She also wants us to ban all the executive producers from Season 1.”

Charlotte laughed at that. “Yes, they probably deserve that for the ending alone. To say nothing of the terrible decisions they’ve made with respect to the spin-off.”[2]

“Getting back to the ‘tagging’ people,” Tom returned to the other adjustment that had been made. “Tag them how?”

“Well, if they’re a stalker sort,” Diana answered him, “then everyone will be alerted to be wary of them, and Charlotte and Sidney can avoid them altogether.”

“No more groping your ass, Sidney,” Alison crossed her arms and sat back in her chair, satisfied that her work was done.[3] “It’ll be like your own, personal terror watch list!”

“Umm…” Charlotte did not know what to say. “Thank you?” She looked to Sidney and Tom to see what they thought about it.

“Has this new system been implemented yet?” Sidney could tell that Alison, Arthur, and Diana meant well, however it seemed an extreme solution to what was mostly an annoyance not a serious threat.

“No, no,” Arthur confirmed. “We know it needs to be put up for a vote. But we wanted it all set to go before you left on your honeymoon, so it can be in place before your return… if you like.”

“All right, well,” Sidney paused. “As Charlotte said, thank you. It’s a very… thoughtful gift.”

Charlotte pretended to cough, as a means of getting his attention. It was a code they’d established when dealing with the guests.

“Need some water?” Sidney asked hurriedly, getting up and pulling her along with him to the kitchen. He was usually more subtle in extricating her from such situations, but that hardly seemed necessary with their siblings.

Once they were out of earshot of the rest, Charlotte began giggling. “Oh lord,” she wiped some tears of laughter from her eyes. “If they wanted us to stop venting when the crazies come to stay, they could have said so.”

“Yeah, I imagine their banning all Elizas from the Parker Family Properties would go about as well as me asking to meet every Charlotte back in June,” Sidney brought Charlotte to him for a hug.[4]

“The tagging part’s not a horrible idea,” Charlotte tried to find some benefit in it. “We tag guests as being vegan or needing other accommodations, why not tag them for being obsessed with Sanditon too?” she was mostly kidding.

“Then your sister would be the ultimate one in need of a tag,” Sidney countered.

After regaining their composure, they returned to the breakfast room where Arthur was demonstrating the modified app for Tom. “We’ve discussed it,” Sidney announced, “and we think the banning of Elizas is unnecessary.”

“I know you want to protect me, Alison,” Charlotte gave her sister a loving smile. “But Sidney and I are in no danger of anyone splitting us up.”

Alison stuck her bottom lip out sadly before mumbling, “Fine, have it your way.”

“It was a clever idea, really, Alison,” Sidney felt badly that she was so deflated now. “We simply don’t need it. And you can ban the executive producers if you want, but what if they make a reservation under an assumed name? How would you know?”

“Oh…” Arthur saw the flaw in their plan. “Hadn’t thought of that.”

“Mm hmm,” Sidney smirked. “Back to the drawing board, Arthur.”

“And the tagging?” Alison hoped to salvage some of her suggestion.

Charlotte walked over to stand directly in front of her, “If we do that, then this week might be your last stay at Trafalgar House.”

Alison’s mouth opened to respond then immediately shut again. Eventually she muttered, “Hadn’t thought of that either.” Charlotte and Sidney began to laugh, and everyone else soon joined in.

Tom’s phone started ringing, indicating a text message from Mary. “We’re apparently ordering pizza for dinner tonight. Who all is joining us?”

“We will,” Diana answered for her and Arthur.

“Me too,” Alison was always glad when someone else took charge of meals.

“We’ll pass,” Sidney had had his fill of family today and wanted nothing more than alone time with Charlotte.

“Very well,” Tom sent Mary a headcount and they all began to make their way out of Corner House.

As Sidney locked the front door, he watched the rest of the group walking back toward Trafalgar House then addressed Charlotte, “So… want to order pizza?”

“Absolutely!”

–––––

Sidney made quick work of the dishes, there not being many of them after ordering in food. He switched off all the lights downstairs, including those on their Christmas tree, before heading up to join Charlotte.

When he got to the door of their bedroom he was disappointed to see she was wearing cozy flannel pyjamas and was in the process of pulling her hair back – two signals that she was not in the mood for anything romantic tonight.

“Don’t tell me I took too long washing up and missed my chance to get lucky,” he teased as he walked in the room.

“You think you’re funny, don’t you?” she twisted her silk scrunchie a final time. “I’m just going to review my To Do List for tomorrow while you get ready for bed.”

Seeing her phone on her lap, he wondered how much effort he’d need to put in to distract her from whatever was on the screen. Approaching her side of the bed, he tried to lean in for a kiss and was met with a don’t try it hand in front of his face.

“Someone insisted we get anchovies on the pizza, so teeth need to be brushed and flossed before there’s any kissing,” she resisted smiling, though he could tell she found it difficult. “Gargling with mouthwash might be advisable too,” she added to make sure he got her point.

“Fair enough,” he redirected his lips to place a kiss on her forehead before turning around and heading to the bathroom. Her hair being up, he assumed, was a silent scolding for the choice of anchovies. It had been his turn to choose the toppings, however, he reminded her after he placed the order.

Charlotte replied to the assortment of text messages that had come in during the evening from her sisters and parents, everyone looking forward to their time in Sanditon this week. She scrolled back up on her message thread with Alison and an idea formed in her mind. When Sidney strolled out of the bathroom while unbuttoning his shirt, gargling his mouthwash to demonstrate how thorough he was being, she set her phone aside to await his return.

After another five minutes or so, he finally finished everything he needed to do in the bathroom and rejoined his fiancée. “It’s a good thing it’s Christmas time,” he switched off the overhead light, leaving the fairy lights surrounding their bed as the only illumination in the room. “This candy cane breath you insisted on might actually be a turn on.”

Wearing only his boxers, Sidney climbed into bed next to Charlotte with the intention of seducing her. His bum had barely met the mattress when his lap was suddenly full of her and, when he reached a hand out to make sure she was not too close to the edge, he found that the pyjama top was the only thing she was wearing.

With an amused chuckle at her fast action he asked, “Was there something you wanted, Ms. Heywood?”

“Actually,” she spoke slowly, “I was thinking of doing something for you, Mr. Parker.” The twinkle in her eye matching the fairy lights.

“I’m intrigued,” he tugged a little at the flannel, indicating he’d rather she not be wearing it. “Tell me more.”

“Well, I know you’ve been getting frustrated that so much of the wedding is still a secret,” she placed her hands on his shoulders, readjusting her position slightly to torment him a little. “And I thought we could play a guessing game. See how much you already do know.”

“What are the rules of this game?” considering her tone, Sidney was certain he’d enjoy any rules she established.

“For each correct guess, I undo a button,” Charlotte smiled seductively.

“And if my guess is incorrect?”

“Then I do up a button,” she explained simply. “But I’m confident you’ll be an excellent guesser, Mr. Parker.”

“Challenge accepted, Ms. Heywood.” He leaned forward to give her a kiss while he decided on his first guess, suddenly grateful that she’d kept him out of the planning so he could enjoy unwrapping her tonight.

🎁 

[1] An extreme example of the phenomenon in Wales - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-wales-57322524

[2] See Chapters 13-15, 25, and 29 of QA for more of this Charlotte’s thoughts on S1 of Sanditon and the spin-off (aka., S2&3).

[3] As was mentioned in Chapter 2 of QA.

[4] Another plot point mentioned in Chapter 2 of QA.

Chapter Text

Wedding Week – Day 3

Arthur’s in charge of you today… drive safely!

Love you,

Charlotte ❤️ 

–––––

“I’m off,” Charlotte gave Sidney a quick kiss on the cheek while he was doing their breakfast dishes. “Text me to let me know when you guys make it to London.”

“Will do… on one condition,” Sidney turned off the water and dried his hands.

“Condition?”

“You give me a proper goodbye kiss,” he drew her to him and spent the next 15 minutes taking his fill of his fiancée.

When he finally released her, Charlotte looked at the time on her phone. “Now I’m going to be late, Mr. Parker,” she scolded him without meaning it.

“Your sisters will understand, Ms. Heywood,” he grinned, having zero regrets about delaying her departure.

She meant to be at Trafalgar House by the time Jane and Katie arrived, but Alison made excuses for her as any good Maid of Honour would do. At least Charlotte got there before the seamstress, so they could stay on schedule for their final dress fittings.

“Have you realized that more than half the guests at your wedding will be in the wedding?” Katie asked as she admired the deep red dress she’d be wearing for the event in three days’ time.[1]

“Yes,” Charlotte acknowledged, “I’m well aware of that. But I wanted all three of you to be up there with me, and tradition dictates that Sidney have three men beside him.”

“Ah, the symmetry,” Alison said like a faux art critic. “Sure it’s not just to appease Tom?”

Charlotte and Sidney did have a lengthy conversation about it, it being a key wedding detail she wasn’t able to surprise him with. If they had only a Maid of Honour and Best Man, they would have selected Alison and Arthur since they’d been the most instrumental siblings during their courtship. In the end, Sidney asked Babington to be his Best Man, returning the favor from when Sidney did the same at Babington’s wedding to Esther.

“No, it’s not,” Charlotte assured them. “I really did want all three of my sisters beside me. And Sidney will have both his brothers, plus his best friend. It’s perfect.”

“What’s perfect,” Jane twirled in her dress, “is this skirt! I love it!” Alison and Katie joined in and Charlotte grabbed her phone to take a photo.

–––––

At the same time the Heywood sisters were spinning, Arthur and Sidney were collecting Babington from Denham Park.[2]

“Good morning, gents!” he greeted them cheerfully.

“Babington,” Sidney spoke out the driver’s side window. “There should be space in the boot for that,” he nodded at the bag Babington was carrying. “We’ll need to keep the rest of the backseat free for what we’re picking up on the way.”

“I’m guessing this,” he pulled a small parcel out of his pocket, “doesn’t go in the boot.”

Sidney’s face lit up, realizing what Babington was holding. “You didn’t say it had arrived when we spoke yesterday,” he reached out eagerly to take the item from his Best Man and hurriedly opened it while Babington put the bag in the back of the car.

Once all three men were settled for their drive, Babington responded to Sidney’s comment, “You owe me one, Parker. Esther was quite upset that the custom-designed jewelry that arrived at our house wasn’t for her.”

“How’d it turn out?” Arthur was trying to get a peek at Charlotte’s wedding band from the passenger seat.

Aside from what he and his groomsmen would be wearing, it was the one aspect of their ceremony Charlotte had permitted Sidney to control. He hoped the excitement when she’d told him it was possible for them to make each other a ring was eclipsed when she saw what he’d designed.[3] He was equally curious to know what she'd designed for him.

“I believe my bride will love it,” Sidney closed the parcel back up, having no intention of showing anyone the ring before it was on Charlotte’s finger.

Their drive from Sanditon to Willingden was uneventful, the three men going over what they needed to accomplish during their exceptionally full day. Like the ladies, they were having the final fittings for their morning suits at Sidney’s tailor in London to ensure no additional adjustments were needed. They would also be making Bedford Place ready for Charlotte and Sidney’s wedding night and the start of their honeymoon.

“Thank you, Caroline,” Sidney gave his soon-to-be-mother-in-law a warm hug while Arthur and Babington loaded everything she’d given him in the car.

“Drive safely, Sidney,” she sounded just like Charlotte. “We don’t want any delays in welcoming you to the family.”

“Nor do I,” Sidney grinned. He’d gotten to know everyone in Charlotte’s family much better in the months since their engagement, and no longer had doubts about their approval. “I’ll see you and George in Sanditon tomorrow, right?”

“That is what Charlotte’s instructed, yes,” Caroline confirmed, not adding anything about the specifics of their arrival because she knew she wasn’t supposed to.

“Great, well, you drive safely too!” he went back to the car, determined to stay on schedule.

–––––

Charlotte breathed deeply, staring at her reflection in the mirror. “Oh my…” it was everything she could have wished for and she could not wait for Sidney to see her in it.

“Charlotte,” Jane handed her a tissue. “It’s beyond perfect.”

“Sidney’s going to faint,” Alison may not be too far off in that prediction. “Maybe that’s why you decided to have the Parker brothers as groomsmen, to keep him propped up!”

All four sisters laughed at the mental image. For as many times as Sidney had suggested they elope or just have a simple exchange of vows at the registry office, she knew he’d love seeing her walking down an aisle in a gown. When she began the search for the ideal dress, she hadn’t thought she’d go with something reminiscent of Georgian styles, but it did seem perfect given the Regency-esque nature of their courtship.

“Question,” Katie said as she took a few photos of Charlotte on Charlotte’s phone as requested. “Aren’t you spending your wedding night in London?”

“We are,” Charlotte blushed slightly at the mention. “Why?”

“Well, you’re not planning to drive there wearing that, are you?” the other sisters held similar curiosity and were glad Katie asked.

“No, I’ll change here before we go,” it seemed obvious to Charlotte, prompting her sisters to all begin smirking at each other.

“And, um…” Alison adopted a mischievous tone. “Will Sidney be helping you out of this,” she tugged on the skirt.

Blushing fully now, Charlotte tried to answer with poise, “I may have added that to the schedule, yes.”

“Ooh,” Jane voiced the delight of all three sisters. “You go girl!”

Just then, Charlotte’s phone began vibrating in Katie’s hand. Sidney was texting from London, so she handed the phone to its owner.

Sidney: At the tailor’s. All is well.

Charlotte: Everything fits?

Sidney: Perfectly. You?

Charlotte: Everything here fits perfectly as well.

Sidney: Can’t wait to see you in it!

Sidney: And to help you out of it! 😘 

Charlotte: Have you installed listening devices in TH?

Sidney: No, why?

Charlotte: My sisters and I were just discussing that.

Sidney: Listening devices?

Charlotte: No… you helping me out of my dress. 😍

Sidney: Ahh… ❤️ 

–––––

“Oh, thank fuck,” Sidney could not hide his relief as they arrived at Bedford Place. The bundled Christmas tree leaning against the front door was the one aspect of his planning that caused Sidney worry. He hadn’t wanted to haul a tree from Sanditon or Willingden, so he researched all the tree delivery services in the city and had to trust that it would be there as promised.[4]

He parked the car and went to open the door, bringing the tree inside himself while Arthur and Babington began unloading the car. Once the boot had been emptied of everything, including his and Charlotte’s suitcases, they put the four boxes from the tailor (theirs and Tom’s) in it for safekeeping.

“Tell me, Sidney,” Babington was carrying Charlotte’s suitcase into the foyer. “How did you get Charlotte to pack this without telling her where you’re going on honeymoon?”

“She didn’t,” Sidney answered succinctly.

“You packed for her?!” Babington would never dare try that with Esther.

“Nope,” Sidney shook his head. “I had Alison do it on Saturday, when Charlotte was busy.”

“Oh, she mentioned she was helping you with something,” Arthur closed the front door and began removing his coat. “Does that mean Alison knows where you’ll be going on honeymoon?”

“You think I’d trust Alison with that information?” the single raised eyebrow told Arthur and Babington it was a rhetorical question.

“Well, I do hope you’ll tell someone,” Arthur had been feeling put out that he might not be trusted enough to keep the secret. “For safety’s sake, of course.”

“As soon as Charlotte knows, we’ll let everyone know,” Sidney patted his brother on the shoulder. “I’m thinking a photo of the flight info at the gate.”

“Makes sense,” Babington was envious that Sidney and Charlotte were traveling, having not been able to convince Esther to take any time off from her work at the NHS for even a mini-break somewhere here in England. “So shall we take the luggage upstairs?”

“No, leave it here,” Sidney instructed. “Our top priority is unloading the groceries, then we put up the tree.”

The men got busy, emptying the carrier bags from their stop at Sainsbury’s and the special treat Mrs. Heywood had prepared at Sidney’s request. They moved on to the Christmas tree, placing it in the drawing room where Charlotte and Sidney had the most difficult conversation of their relationship. During their week in London after their engagement, they’d talked that whole misunderstanding through – again – and decided that the room should have nothing but pleasant memories for them moving forward. Putting the tree there made sense both practically and personally, and Sidney could not wait for Charlotte to see it.

Babington had purchased the tree holder, tree skirt, fairy lights, and tinsel, so there was no chance of Charlotte happening upon any of it and guessing what Sidney was up to. He’d managed to surprise her with one tree already, but didn’t want to risk her knowing about this one in advance either. It would be their first Christmas as a couple and Sidney did not want her to feel she’d had to choose the wedding over her other beloved traditions.

The final touches were ornaments from the Heywood family tree that Caroline knew had special meaning for Charlotte. Sidney did not know the stories behind them, but they’d have time on Christmas for his wife to share all the childhood anecdotes she wanted to. He also placed two gifts under the tree, certain they’d put a smile on his bride’s face.

Stepping back to admire their work, an alarm went off on Sidney’s phone intended to keep them on schedule. “Okay, would you two mind seeing to the bedding?” He walked back to the kitchen to get the last carrier bag that had not been emptied. “And I’ve got to arrange a few things in my bathroom.”

“Certainly, Sidney,” Arthur grinned. “More surprises for Charlotte?” he nodded at the bag.

Sidney rolled his eyes. “Yes, Arthur, nothing salacious.”

“At least, not yet,” Babington teased, able to guess what a newly married couple might get up to on their wedding night.

–––––

“So you don’t know where you’re going on honeymoon?” Katie had enjoyed her part in one of Sidney’s secret plans before, but could not imagine traveling when so unawares.[5] The sisters were enjoying dinner in the bistro, being the only diners and essentially helping themselves to anything they wanted in the kitchen.

“For all I know, we’re going to honeymoon at Bedford Place.” Charlotte imagined Sidney had a grander plan, but so far she’d done nothing to try to get that information out of him. “Truth be told, I wouldn’t mind getting off ‘plague island’ for a while.”[6]

“How will you know what to pack?” Jane was the most sensible Heywood sister, even more so than Charlotte. Neither of them noticed Alison’s grin that disappeared quickly behind her glass of wine.

“I’m to pack an overnight bag and Sidney’s taking care of the rest,” Charlotte told them what few instructions he’d given her. She suspected he’d be purchasing what she needed for wherever they might be going. He’d done a good job with her dresses for the Fête in July, so, once again, she trusted him.[7]

Reaching to pour herself some more wine, Charlotte defended their wedding and honeymoon arrangements, “I think we’ve divvied up the planning really well.” After taking a sip she added, “Although Sidney knowing so little about the wedding has him thinking mostly of the honeymoon.”

“Oh please,” Alison scoffed, not wanting to revisit Charlotte’s wobble from the other day. “He’d be focusing on the honeymoon regardless of how much he knows about the ceremony.”

Drawing another blush from Charlotte, they all knew that to be true. Charlotte internally admitted that she was probably focusing so much on the wedding to keep herself from thinking too much about the honeymoon. Sidney would occasionally drop comments about how memorable he’d make it and her heart rate sped up exponentially each time. Friday could not arrive soon enough for either of them!

–––––

“Right, I think everything’s ready,” Sidney returned to the drawing room, having completed his tasks upstairs.

“Excellent,” Babington had a glass of whisky in his hand, glad to not be the one driving them back to Sanditon. “Shall I text Esther and tell her I’m on my way home?”

“Sure thing,” Sidney took out his own phone to send Charlotte a message too. “I’ll just stop in the loo and we can be on our way. We’ll get something for dinner when we stop for petrol.”

“Must we really?” Arthur was disappointed not to have something more interesting to eat, it was typically one of the perks of spending a day in London. “How about I place us a take away order somewhere that we can pick up on as we head out of the city?”

Sidney considered the idea. He was used to the selection at the motorway services after all the time he spent at them over the summer. Arthur had a more refined palate. Since Sidney had more or less shot down the app yesterday he didn’t want to put another frown on his younger brother’s face, even if it delayed their journey. “Okay, but make sure you get me a sandwich or something that’s not too messy.”

“Consider it done!” Arthur got out his phone with renewed energy.

–––––

By the time Sidney climbed into bed with Charlotte that night, he was well and truly exhausted. Day trips to London were one thing when taking the train, when you could relax or stand up and stretch. He really wanted to take a hot shower, to ease the muscles in his back that he knew would scream at him tomorrow. But upon seeing a sleeping Charlotte in their bed that idea evaporated. The only thing he needed now was to have her in his arms. Then maybe in the morning, they’d take that hot shower together.

💤 

[1] I’m being intentionally vague with the descriptions of the dresses. Imagine whatever you like!

[2] In Austen, the residence is called Denham Park and there’s a street named Denham Place.

[3] You can find such fun ideas on the Internet - https://www.theworkbenchlondon.com/how-it-works

[4] There are several - https://www.timeout.com/london/shopping/where-to-buy-a-christmas-tree-in-london

[5] See Chapter 38 of QA.

[6] The term’s been used to describe Britain a great deal this year - https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2021/nov/19/visit-britain-plague-holiday-destination

[7] See Chapter 19 of QA.

Chapter Text

For the first time in weeks, Sidney awakened before Charlotte. She was curled into him, using his chest as a pillow. The worst thing about their pending nuptials, he decided, was that she insisted they not spend the night before their wedding together. He hated sleeping without her and avoided it at all costs.

She probably had one of her notes around here somewhere, letting him know whose task it was today to keep him away from Trafalgar House. Considering he was due to spend most of his time at Waterloo Crescent he assumed it would be Tom again, who would no doubt drone on about the Chancellor’s announcement yesterday promising additional support for the hospitality sector.[1] No need to dwell on that, though, when Sidney had so many more pleasant things to think about.

Charlotte began to stir, stretching herself along his side. “Mmm, good morning Sidney,” she murmured when he stroked her hair to let her know he was already awake. “What time did you get home?”

“Around midnight,” he yawned. “You were sound asleep.”

She propped herself up on his chest slowly. “Had one too many glasses of wine to wait up for you,” she kissed him. “Shall I make it up to you?” she snaked a hand under the covers temptingly.

“Actually,” he halted the motion by grabbing hold of her wrist. “I was thinking a nice, hot shower would make for a great start to the day.”

“Oh were you now?” she didn’t need to be convinced. “Sounds like an excellent plan, Mr. Parker.”

“After you, Ms. Heywood,” he let her leave the bed first, following closely behind.

–––––

Tom was at Waterloo Crescent when Sidney arrived, definitely enthused by the prospect of government grants that may or may not materialize.[2] Then, mid-morning, the elder Parker said he was ‘needed’ at Trafalgar House and left Sidney to his own devices. Was there going to be a gap in his pre-wedding supervision today, he wondered briefly before a familiar truck stopped in front of the B&B.

Opening the front door, Sidney greeted Charlotte’s father with a wave, “George!” The older man got out of the passenger seat in the truck, Mrs. Heywood being behind the wheel. “Anything the matter?” As far as Sidney knew, they weren’t supposed to arrive until the evening.

Closing the door so Caroline could continue on with her day, George walked over to shake Sidney’s hand, while holding a bag that appeared to contain lunch in the other. “Nothing’s wrong, my boy. I’m to keep you company. Charlotte’s orders.”

“Ah,” Sidney chuckled. “I thought maybe I’d had a reprieve and didn’t need to be watched today.”

“In defense of my daughter,” George took the opportunity to impart some wisdom, “I think she’s made all these arrangements to give you the chance to spend time with your brothers and friends. And me, of course,” he added with a chuckle of his own. “Before you’re hers entirely!”

“That may be,” Sidney supposed. “And I’d be happy to show you what we’re up to here.”

“More of my daughter’s planning,” George was pleased that Charlotte had found a project she was so passionate about, and a man like Sidney who was so determined to support her in all she did. “Aside from you, this renovation is the thing she talks about most.”

Sidney led his future father-in-law into the B&B for a tour of what had already been done, and what was still to come, while they exchanged praise of Charlotte.

–––––

People were being steadily added to the wedding bubble during the week. Yes, they were mixing more households than was advisable with the surge in Omicron cases.[3] However, everyone was taking lateral flow tests each morning to enable the families to relax and enjoy their time together.[4] And, with the exception of the children, everyone attending the wedding had gotten at least two vaccine doses and several had gotten a booster as well.[5]

Today’s addition of Charlotte’s parents to the mix was certain to liven up the conversations. It was also officially the last day of ‘work’ at the Parker Family Properties until next week, a needed break for all involved.

“So, who’s watching Sidney today?” Diana had been so busy at Hillier House, she’d lost track.

“Our father,” Alison answered, being as well versed in Sidney’s schedule this week as she was Charlotte’s. “Though Pops has responsibilities here later.”

“Oh, he’s so excited,” Caroline noted. “I do hope he doesn’t let anything slip when he’s talking with Sidney this afternoon.”

“I don’t think he will,” Charlotte was confident that her father would conceal what he was up to with Tom. “They’ve put too much work in to spoil it now.”

The kitchen door swung open, Jenny holding it so her father could push a cart out with individual, lidded soup terrines set on it. “Your first course is ready, ladies!” Tom was appropriately masked, a measure of precaution he’d been conscientious about since the summer. He knew he needed to regain the trust of his family, friends, and employees, whether masking was government-mandated or not.

“Potato and leek soup,” Jenny recited the first dish on the menu she and her siblings were helping their father make as she began handing out terrines at one end of the table while Tom did the same at the other end.

As soon as they’d finished delivering the soup, father and daughter retreated to the kitchen to continue preparing the next course.

“Your children are adorable, Mary,” Caroline appraised the young Parkers she’d met in the lobby earlier. “It’s so sweet that they wanted to help make us lunch.”

“They’d do anything for their Uncle Sidney and Aunt Charlotte,” Mary explained. “Just don’t expect the same prompt service you’d get from the bistro staff.”

“A long, leisurely lunch is precisely what I want today,” Charlotte hoped everyone would not feel rushed at any point, family time being especially important to her this year.

“Plus,” Mary took the lid off her terrine, “we all appreciate the need to keep an eye on Tom when he’s in the kitchen after what happened during Caramel Week.”

“Oh God, yes!” Diana laughed. She had been one of the first to witness the devastation of Tom and Mary’s kitchen when he attempted to make a “visually spectacular dessert” placed under a caramel globe.[6]

“Yes, George said Tom had difficulty controlling his spun sugar,” Charlotte’s mother was relieved her husband had limited himself to trying to recreate that week’s Technical Challenge on The Great British Bake Off – 10 Caramel Fingers.[7]

“I had to ban Tom from using our home kitchen after that,” Mary continued in her explanation to the Heywoods who had not heard the full story before. “He’s more mindful about mess here at the bistro.”

Jane was the next to comment on the special project George and Tom were working on, “I still can’t believe you’re letting them make your wedding cake.”

Katie agreed, wholeheartedly, “Dad and Tom being remote baking buddies has been unexpectedly cute, but I think we should steer clear of the kitchen while they’re in there together.”

“Exactly why the children are going to function as our eyes and ears,” Alison sounded like a puppet master, directing everyone’s actions as she’d done at the pool on Sunday to make people behave as she wanted.

“Sidney and I wanted a family wedding, with all of you taking part in some way,” Charlotte did not share everyone else's concerns. “If the cake winds up being a disaster, it will still make for a memorable story in the future.”

“Come now, Charlotte,” Mary had a knowing look on her face. “You weren’t so confident about it when they first made the offer. And then Caramel Week happened, and I thought sure you’d change your mind!”

“True,” Charlotte acknowledged with a smile, “I was plenty… hesitant… about the idea, especially because I was making the decision without Sidney’s input. But I’d tried plenty of the things they’d each baked by then and knew they could do it if they put their minds to it.”

“Just no caramel globes or spun sugar,” Diana reiterated.

“And thankfully by giving them the cake to focus on you put an end to their experimenting before Patisserie Week,” Caroline expressed her thanks to her daughter. “Taste-testing for that would have been dangerous for all of us!”

–––––

Arthur arrived at Waterloo Crescent around the same time Henry and Tom were serving the ladies their main course. Spotting George and Sidney through one of the windows, Arthur went in to say hello.

“Charlotte hasn’t sent you to watch me too, has she?” upon seeing his brother’s entrance, Sidney felt some dismay at what he worried was his fiancée’s lack of faith in him.

“No, no, Sidney,” Arthur shook his head. “Charlotte’s given me no instructions today. I’m on my way to No. 5 to get some measurements. I thought I’d come welcome George, that’s all.”

“Thank you, Arthur,” Mr. Heywood extended his hand. “Sidney’s been giving me the grand tour. Before we ate lunch, I even got to swing the sledgehammer a few times!”

“Not many chances in life to do that,” Arthur, for one, had no desire for such aggression even when the opportunity presented itself. “Is everything still on schedule?”

“For the most part,” Sidney admitted, relieved Tom had not created any problems while they were in London. In fact, it was almost as though Tom hadn’t been around at all yesterday. “As for the measurements you’re taking…”

“Right, well, I know I’m unlikely to convince any of you about my idea to put in a bakery,” Arthur paused for a breath, “so I’m putting together a full proposal, complete with measurements, the cost of the display cases, and all other expenses.”

“Charlotte said something about that,” George commented on the idea, now being an enthusiastic amateur baker himself. “It would enable you to reuse some of the appliances that are otherwise going to waste.”

“We’re planning to donate what we can,” Arthur replied before Sidney could say essentially the same thing. “Better for the environment and they still have plenty of life left in them.”

“That reminds me, Arthur,” Sidney pulled up his email on his phone. “I haven’t heard back from the guy at the British Heart Foundation about fixing a time for them to collect the washing machines and fridges. Could I forward his last message to you so you can follow-up with him next week?”[8]

“Certainly,” Arthur nodded.

As Sidney forwarded the message, George and Arthur walked through the gaping hole that was now between Nos. 7 & 8. “These all have the same floorplan, yes?” George asked.

“That they do,” Arthur confirmed. Taking George’s question as encouragement about his bakery idea, Arthur explained his vision. “My idea is to convert the front room into the shop itself, while the kitchen would obviously remain the kitchen, though we’d have to expand it into the pantry to have enough room.”

“Where would you store your ingredients?”

“Depends if we only convert No. 5 into a bakery or No. 4 too,” Arthur was clearly hoping for the latter. “We know all the remaining kitchens will be decommissioned, for lack of a better term, so combining two into one would do the trick.”

“Sidney said the plumbing in some would be converted to loos,” George saw his future son-in-law coming to join them as he spoke.

“And so it shall,” Sidney confirmed. “Arthur trying to sell you on his bakery idea, I take it?”

“I’m sure I’m not the one he needs to convince,” George chuckled. “Not sure I even have any sway over Charlotte anymore.”

“She’ll always look to you and Caroline for advice,” Sidney reassured his bride’s father.

“Oh, don’t mistake me, Sidney,” George patted the nervous groom on the back, “it’s what parents want to have happen – their children growing up and becoming their own people.” Sensing he might have unsettled their pleasant afternoon, he continued, “And, of course, we want them to find someone who’ll do anything for them, just as Charlotte’s done.”

“Thank you, George,” Sidney coughed a little, and wiped something from his eye there being a good deal of dust in the air with all the demolition.

–––––

Henry stuck his head in to see if everyone was done with their main course. His mother spotted him and waved him over. Speaking with her in hushed tones, he soon scurried back to the kitchen. Not long after, the door swung open again and two carts were pushed into the room. Jenny’s was empty, and she and Henry worked to clear the table. Tom’s was laden with cupcakes and a small stack of gifts each tied with a matching white ribbon.

“Oh my!” Charlotte was expecting the dessert, not the presents. “What have you all done?” she asked the children, thinking they must be responsible for the extra items on the cart.

“They’re not from us,” Alicia deflected Charlotte’s wide-eyed look to the women she was having lunch with. “We only frosted the cupcakes,” she smiled sheepishly, knowing that they were far from professionally done.

“I’m sure they’re delicious,” Charlotte gave the girl a side hug when accepting a cupcake from her. “As for the rest of you, I thought I said no presents,” she scolded them halfheartedly.

“They’re not presents per se,” Alison corrected. “They’re tradition.” She whispered something to Alicia, who started handing the gifts not to Charlotte, but to her mother, her aunt, Mrs. Heywood, and Alison.

“And we get to eat our cupcakes,” Katie joked about the fact that she and Jane did not have a role to play at the moment. The wedding was probably more relaxed for the two of them than anyone, and they were enjoying it.

“Actually,” Jane got her phone out. “We should probably take photos,” she nudged Katie.

“Too right,” Alison agreed. “The cupcakes aren’t going anywhere.”

Tom and the children finished clearing the dishes and cutlery that was no longer needed, then left the ladies to their gifts and desserts, promising to bring tea and coffee later.

Watching whom the four gifts were handed to, Charlotte figured they were her old, new, borrowed, and blue.[9] Alison had claimed supervision of the tradition early on in the wedding preparations and Charlotte had not given it much thought since, expecting to get the items on the day itself.

“Suitably enough,” Caroline got them underway, “I have something old.” She handed the largest box to Charlotte, who tugged the ribbon off so she could remove the lid.

“Oh, Mum,” Charlotte felt the tears rush to her eyes and down her cheeks at the sight of her mother’s veil. She then looked at Alison who had ‘talked her out’ of wearing a veil at all, saying they were soooo last century. “You could have been honest with me,” she reprimanded her Maid of Honour.

“Nope,” Alison shook her head. “The expression on your face now is priceless.”

“Be extra careful with it,” Jane instructed Charlotte. “We all want to wear it when it’s our turn to be the bride.”

“Absolutely,” Charlotte willingly agreed as she leaned over to go give her mother a hug. “Thank you, Mum.”

“I have no doubt Sidney will love seeing you in it as much as your father did me,” she embraced her daughter tightly. “And I’m sure it will bring you luck.”

“Okay, I’m next,” Diana moved things along. “Alison asked me to do something new, to welcome you to the Parker family.” She passed a much smaller box to Charlotte.

Untying the ribbon and lifting the lid, Charlotte was delighted to see a mostly empty charm bracelet inside. On closer inspection, she could see the two charms that Diana had placed on it were a seashell and a heart with a P engraved on it. “It’s lovely, Diana. Thank you so much.”

“You and Sidney can add to it,” Diana explained. “I just wanted to get you started.”

“I’m sure we’ll have fun coming up with new additions,” Charlotte said without realizing how what she said sounded. When her sisters started snickering, the double meaning occurred to her. “Oh,” her cheeks reddened. “Well, that too,” there was no need to be embarrassed in this company.

“Mine next,” Mary held an even smaller box out across the table for Charlotte. “Something borrowed, though there’s no rush in getting them back to me.”

The assembled Heywoods leaned in to get a better look as Charlotte opened the box, obviously not knowing what it contained. The glint off the diamond earrings was visible as soon as the lid was removed. “Mary, they’re gorgeous!”

“They look like antiques,” Caroline remarked, clearly as impressed with the jewelry as her daughter.

“That they are,” Mary was pleased by the reaction to her choice. “They were my ‘something old’ when Tom and I got married. They were given to me by Sidney’s mother, who I’m sure would want you to wear them on your special day.”

“They were grandmother’s originally,” Diana added, “given to her by my grandfather as her ‘something new’ though he always said that he should have been considered her something new.” Everyone shared a laugh at that.

“I’ll be honored to wear them,” Charlotte teared up again, anticipating Sidney’s reaction when he saw her wearing his grandmother’s earrings when she walked down the aisle. “Thank you, Mary.”

“Now for something blue,” Alison had another small box. “I was sorely tempted to steal your shoes and dye them, but decided against it in the end.” As she handed over the box, she added, “This will come in useful both during and after the ceremony.”

Charlotte opened it with trepidation, expecting it to contain a garter or other sexually suggestive item. When she saw what was inside, she could not contain a brief burst of laughter. There was a handkerchief with royal blue embroidery along the edge that read: Property of Charlotte Parker!!!

“A comment on how likely I am to cry?” considering she’d already wiped tears away twice in the last twenty minutes, Charlotte could not fault her sister for selecting such a practical gift.

“That’s a given,” Alison nodded at the tissue crumpled in her sister’s hand. “But the best part is that if Sidney ever has to go on any business trips without you, you can make him use it as a pocket square!” Charlotte gave her Maid of Honour a bemused smile as she held up the handkerchief for everyone to see. When they saw the reason for her initial laughter, they laughed as well.

Tom and the children apparently took that as their cue to bring in tea and coffee, though Charlotte could not tell if Alison had arranged that in advance.

Aside from the veil, which was safely set to the side where no one could spill anything on it or touch it with gooey fingers, the remainder of the items were passed around the table so everyone could see them up close. There were suitable oohs and aahs about the earrings, in particular, and the cupcakes. At Charlotte’s request, Tom did not tell anyone they were miniature versions of the wedding cake they’d enjoy in two days time and that this was a secret taste test.

When everyone was done eating, Alison got their attention for one final gift. “You’ll want to take out your new handkerchief for this one, Charlotte,” she held up the smallest box yet. So small, there wasn’t even a ribbon on it. Seeing the questioning expression on her sister’s face, Alison explained, “It’s from Sidney.”

“From Sidney?” she was supposed to surprise him with things this week, however he kept sneaking in surprises for her.

Opening the final box of the afternoon, Charlotte gasped as she’d done when she saw the tree Sidney saved for her. Taking a few deep breaths, and – yes – making use of her new handkerchief, she looked at the room full of Heywoods and Parkers who were all staring at her inquisitively. It seemed Alison was the only one who knew what was in the box.

“It’s for the final line of the rhyme,” she reached in and took out a coin, “a sixpence for my shoe, except that…” she paused, then swallowed distinctly, “it’s from 1817.”

“Aww, the year Austen wrote about Sanditon,” Mary was the first to make the connection.

“Sidney’s one for details, that’s for sure,” Diana was unsurprised her brother had done something so thoughtful for Charlotte.

“Having spent the afternoon with the man, I definitely agree with you,” George let his presence be known from the doorway to the lobby.

“Papa!” Charlotte sprang up to welcome him with a hug, the coin clasped in her hand. “Is everything under control at Corner House?”

“It is,” George confirmed. Seeing his daughter would much rather be hugging someone else, he smirked as he added, “And your fiancé is waiting out front to take you home, if you’re ready to go.”

Charlotte practically sprinted out of the bistro so she could join Sidney, forgetting to say goodbye to everyone. Her family and almost family exchanged amused looks that more or less all said “that figures” before enjoying the rest of their afternoon and evening together.

🤗 

[1] Announced as I was posting yesterday’s chapter, actually. I considered having Sidney hear about it on the radio during the drive, but opted to tuck it in here instead - https://www.business-live.co.uk/retail-consumer/chancellor-rishi-sunak-announces-1bn-22531783

[2] I don’t think the Parkers would be eligible for the grants, since they’re not losing revenue due to Omicron currently (having chosen to close for a family function). Whether Tom would want to realize that or not is another story… but I refuse to let him derail this story by discussing it.

[3] Advice from the Scottish Parliament last Tuesday - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-59655829

[4] Lateral flow tests are available for free from the NHS (and Charlotte will have made sure to have plenty in advance, so recent shortages would not affect the supply at Trafalgar House) - https://www.gov.uk/order-coronavirus-rapid-lateral-flow-tests

[5] Charlotte’s parents, Tom and Mary, Diana, Arthur, and Babington and Esther are boosted. Tom got his 2nd dose on Sept. 16th (28 days after his positive test result as per NHS guidance), so he was eligible for a booster on Sidney’s birthday. Charlotte’s siblings will get them soon, as they weren’t able to get to a pop-up clinic yet. Just this morning, the MHRA approved giving the vaccine to children aged 5-11 in the U.K. but so far the JCVI are only recommending it for vulnerable children - https://www.theguardian.com/society/2021/dec/22/jcvi-set-to-recommend-vaccinating-vulnerable-five--to-11-year-olds

[6] The Showstopper Challenge in Week 7 of the 2021 series of The Great British Bake Off (aka., The Great British Baking Show).

[7] See Chapter 40 of QA for the three-sentence paragraph that set up this part of the plot.

[8] Washing machines and fridges can be donated to the British Heart Foundation, though other kitchen appliances cannot be - https://www.bhf.org.uk/shop/donating-goods/what-to-donate

[9] Some history of the tradition, if you are unfamiliar with it - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Something_old

Chapter Text

Wedding Week – Day 5

Babington’s in charge of you today… behave yourself!

Love you,

Charlotte ❤️ 

Sidney read the note on Charlotte’s pillow then rolled back over to close his eyes. He assumed she’d written all these missives well in advance, however he had to wonder if her telling him to behave himself was added after last night. Or, as he’d put it before he playfully chased her up to their room, his last chance to make love to Charlotte Heywood. He’d definitely not behaved himself, to their mutual enjoyment!

Reaching for his phone, he thought briefly about trying to coax her back to bed. No, he’d have a better chance of seducing her if he went downstairs. Sidney got up quickly, grabbing boxers, jeans, and a shirt to wear and heading to the bathroom to get dressed.

Charlotte heard Sidney when he started moving around upstairs, not too much later than he typically awoke in the morning. She kept her focus on the Christmas gifts she was wrapping, hoping to get a few more done before he appeared and tried to pick up where they left off in the middle of night.

Sure enough, when Sidney made his way downstairs and found Charlotte in the dining room, he wasted no time in stepping behind her so he could sweep her hair to one side and place a few hungry kisses on her neck. “How is it, Ms. Heywood, that you don’t have all your Christmas gifts wrapped already?”

Reaching a hand up to hold him in place, she encouraged him to continue, “Perhaps it’s because my fiancé enjoys distracting me…”

“Is that a complaint?” he murmured before taking her earlobe in his mouth.

“Ah…” her fingers tightened in his hair “…never.” To further confirm that, she turned her head and brought his mouth to hers for a lengthy kiss.

When Sidney’s back began to protest against the position he was standing in, he reluctantly ended the kiss to stand upright but did not miss the opportunity to drop a kiss of regret on her forehead. “Have you eaten?”

“Nope,” Charlotte picked up her empty mug, “coffee only, so far.”

“All right,” he took the mug from her so he could refill it. “Any requests?”

“Well, we should probably use up the eggs and veggies,” she suggested.

“Omelets it is,” he grinned as he made his way to the kitchen. Although he had intended to have his way with Charlotte again, he’d make sure whatever she had on her agenda today went without a hitch instead.

By the time breakfast was ready, Charlotte had finished all the wrapping and was placing the gifts in some large carrier bags so she could take them with her to Trafalgar House.

“Those look incredibly lightweight,” Sidney noted as he brought their food into the room.

“Uh huh,” Charlotte affirmed his observation. “Everyone’s getting something from Gallivant Scotland, actually.” When your friends from university start businesses during the pandemic, you do what you can to support them.[1] “After Storm Arwen, I decided soft, warm, knitted presents would be ideal.”[2]

“Encouraging snuggling,” he pulled her in for a hug. “I approve of that.”

“I know you do,” she held him tightly, taking in the thought that the next time they were together they’d be getting married. Feeling her emotions building, she returned to tasks that needed to be done. “Go fetch the coffee, and I’ll set these by the door.”

Their breakfast conversation focused on Charlotte’s continued amazement that Sidney got her an 1817 sixpence for the wedding. She had some hesitation about putting an historic relic in her shoe, but Sidney reminded her that a coin that old had probably survived worse.

“Had I known what a turn on pre-decimal coinage is for you, I’d have gotten you some months ago,” he joked as he stacked their plates to take them back into the kitchen.

“It wasn’t the coin, Sidney,” she set her hand on his. “It was the thought behind the coin. Not many people would take the initiative to track one down from a specific year.”

Sidney grasped Charlotte’s hand and brought it to his mouth for a chaste kiss, “You’re more than worth the initiative, darling.” He again opted not to seduce her; there was probably something to be said for keeping a little distance right before the wedding to make the wedding night all the more passionate. “Now, I’m going to do the washing up and you’re going to head to Trafalgar House.”

She nodded in agreement, glad to see he was willing to proceed with the day apart as she’d asked. “And the next time my hand’s in yours, we’ll be exchanging our vows,” she squeezed his before letting it go.

“Go…” he nudged her, “before I lose all restraint and drag you back to bed.”

“Tomorrow,” she teased, kissing him briefly on the check before heading to the front door.

–––––

Sidney’s Bachelor Party began with drinks and cigars in the drawing room of Denham Park. Charlotte’s brother, John, had arrived after lunch, being the final guest to make it to Sanditon for the wedding. The six men had split into two groups of conversation. In one cluster, Babington and Arthur were again trying to wheedle hints out of Sidney about where he was taking Charlotte on honeymoon.

“Are you certain she wants to go anywhere?” Babington asked, largely out of understanding that his wife had no wish to travel during the pandemic.

“Fairly certain,” Sidney swirled the ice cube in his glass. “We’ll discuss it on Saturday and go with Plan B if that’s what she’d prefer.”[3]

“Plan B?” Arthur asked. “I don’t suppose we’ll get any more out of you about Plan B than Plan A, will we?”

“As I told you the other day, once Charlotte knows, I’ll let you know,” he appreciated that his brother and best friend were concerned that all go well for him and Charlotte. “Another round, gentlemen?” perhaps if they had a second drink, they’d ease up on the questions.

Walking to the sideboard, Sidney could hear John and George being regaled by Tom with tales of the South Shore Business Consortium’s efforts. The group was demanding action from the government about the raw sewage being pumped into British waters.[4] They had done little beyond gathering signatures on a petition and tweeting up a storm, but come spring they may be compelled to take more direct action. Despite getting a substantial amount of bad news in 2021, they were certain there would be more unfortunate revelations in 2022 and they wanted to wait until the other shoe dropped, so to speak, before moving forward with any protests.

–––––

The ladies spent the first part of the afternoon decorating Trafalgar House for the wedding. All the Christmas decorations provided a festive base, to which lots and lots of white and cream would be added. The ceremony itself would be on the terrace, weather permitting, Charlotte taking it upon herself to arrange the space precisely as she wanted it.

She’d hired a white, canopy tent to fit between the permanent awnings that were above the tables. Workers had set it up in the morning. Although there was only “a touch of rain” forecast for tomorrow, the ability to retain the warmth from heaters would create a cozy feel when she and Sidney exchanged their vows.[5] Not that Charlotte was worried about staying warm – being close to Sidney always had that effect on her.

“What can I help with?” Jane was the first to come outside to see what Charlotte wanted them to do.

“Uh, we need to move the heaters,” Charlotte walked to one. “Two on either side of the wedding party to start,” she tipped it on the wheels designed to make rearranging them easy, showing Jane how it was done. Charlotte placed one on the side where she and her sisters would stand and Jane moved another across from it for Sidney and his groomsmen.

“We need a semi-circle of ten chairs next, with a gap for the aisle.”[6]

Mary and Caroline were the next to emerge from inside, joining in to help position the chairs that they, Diana, Esther, George, John, and the children would be sitting in.

“Who’s the tenth chair for?” Mary wondered as she fetched one from a table.

“Georgiana,” Charlotte said without pausing her movements. “She’s in Bristol supporting the people on trial for pulling down Colston’s statue, but will join us virtually.”[7]

“Did she manage to get one of Banksy’s t-shirts?” Jane wondered.[8]

“Yes, she did!” Charlotte pulled up a selfie Georgiana had sent her last week, smiling proudly wearing the highly sought-after garment.

As Charlotte showed the photo to Jane and Mary, Caroline realized what her daughter intended with the arrangement once all the chairs were out. “Oh, I see, we’ll all be in a circle.”

“More of an oval, I think,” Charlotte tucked her phone away then moved to slide a few of the chairs to flatten the curve. “But yes, the four of us up front will curve like that,” she swept her arm to demonstrate, “and that’s reflected by all of you out here.”

Diana brought out a mess of all-weather twinkle lights, having finished putting up the ones inside the bistro where the reception would take place. “Are we ready for these yet?”

“Not quite,” Charlotte was pulling another heat lamp into place. “We need to get these set, then we’ll attach the lights to them,” she used her hand to again visually explain that they’d swag from one light to the next behind the chairs.

The remainder of the setup only took about another thirty minutes. Because they would not be outside for long, Charlotte saw no need to overdo with the decorations. It was more about creating the ambiance she wanted, making them all feel like a single family. They switched the heat lamps on midway through their work and everyone agreed they would be toasty enough for the short ceremony.

“Thank you all so much for your help,” Charlotte looked with satisfaction at everything. “And I’m sorry again for dashing out yesterday like I did.”

“Oh, we all understood,” Mary assured her. “You’ve given yourself an extra challenge, scheduling so much time away from Sidney when you want nothing more than to be with him.”

“But we appreciate having so much time with you this week,” Caroline stepped closer to Charlotte to give her a hug. “It’s been so special.”

“Tea’s ready,” Katie called from the door to the bistro.

“Or something stronger, if you’d prefer it,” Alison was standing next to her with a bottle of rum in her hand. “It’s not too early, is it?” she smiled sweetly at her mother’s disapproving expression. Alison did enjoy pushing everyone’s buttons.

Charlotte responded to Alison’s question, “If you’re drinking that, you do not get to help figure out how I’m going to wear my hair with Mum’s veil.”

“Deal!” Alison thought that was a fair tradeoff. Anyway, Charlotte was guaranteed to wear it down since that’s how Sidney preferred it. Pivoting to go back into the bistro, the rest of the ladies soon joined her and Katie inside.

The bride had one final task before the venue would be ready. She got a piece of chalk out of her bag and walked to the place where she and Sidney would stand tomorrow. Kneeling down, she wrote Sidney’s name on the bricks and drew a heart around it. Then she did the same for herself next to him. As she stood back up, she felt more tears welling in her eyes. “Less than a day left, Sidney,” she spoke to her engagement ring, which she brought to her mouth for a kiss. “Love you so, so much.”

–––––

After a few more rounds of drinks, the men were laughing uproariously at the latest anecdote Tom and Arthur were recounting about young Sidney’s penchant for skinny-dipping in the sea. Babington had already told a story from their school days about Sidney’s first crush, everyone agreeing that he had more game now that he was grown. Through each tale, Sidney tried to maintain his composure, hoping Charlotte’s brother and father did not decide they disapproved of him after all.

The sound of an old-fashioned bell ringing drew their attention to the doorway, where Esther was waiting to say something. “Thank you, boys,” she acknowledged the sudden silence in the room. “I’ve been asked by the bride to keep you on schedule. Seems she realized you might not manage it on your own,” her acerbic smile matched her tone. Today was Esther’s first day off work in who knows how long, having spent most of the last few weeks going to the homes of the critically vulnerable to give them booster jabs.[9]

“George and Tom need to high tail it to Trafalgar House,” she read off the message on her phone, adding her own flourishes to the phrasing. “And the rest of you fools less than two hours of daylight remaining.”

“Charlotte did not call us fools, did she?” slightly drunk Sidney worried that Esther had been listening to the stories and relayed something to Charlotte.

“Fear not, Sidney,” Babington interjected. “That’s my wife’s commentary on what we’re doing next. Your bride has no idea what we’re up to today, I promise.”

“What are we up to, Babbers?”

“We’re off to the stables!” he slapped Sidney on the back as he said it.

“The stables?” surely there was no chance they’d be riding today.

“Certainly, it’s a Babington family tradition,” getting up and encouraging the rest to do the same, he was amused by the befuddled look on the groom’s face. “We went riding for my Bachelor Party,” he reminded Sidney.

“But you and Esther were married in July,” Sidney noted, looking to Esther and seeing her smirking at him. “It’s December,” he pointed at the gloomy gray sky outside, vaguely remembering there was rain in the forecast that appeared to be falling currently.

“And?” Babington did not see a problem with the weather, he’d ridden out in blizzard conditions before.[10]

“Well, George and I will be off,” Tom set his glass down and stood, swaying a little as he did so. He was silently glad he had an excuse not to go riding.

“I’ll be driving you,” Esther jingled her keys. “We’ll open the windows to help sober the both of you up some, before your wives become aware of how much you’ve had to drink this afternoon.”

“Can I come with?” Arthur asked, anxiously. “I’d rather not go riding, sorry Babbers.”

“Yes, of course,” Esther agreed. She thought her husband’s notion of a fun male-bonding activity was beyond foolish, so she’d give anyone a way out who wanted it.

The four left the drawing room, leaving Babington, John, and Sidney behind. John had actually had nothing to drink, knowing his sister would kill him if anything happened to Sidney today. “I’ve got a raincoat for you to wear, Sidney,” he informed the groom. “Charlotte’s orders, she doesn’t want you getting sick.”

“I thought you said she didn’t know what we were doing today!” Sidney addressed his Best Man with an accusatory tone.

“She doesn’t, I swear,” Babington held up his hands in defense.

“He’s right, she doesn’t,” John concurred, not wanting Sidney to get any more agitated. “I knew what we were going to be doing and planned accordingly. All Charlotte told me to do was keep you safe, so you’d return to her unharmed.”

“Right… Babington, I don’t think riding is such a good idea,” Sidney thought with John’s help, he could talk his way out of it.

“Nonsense, Sidney,” Babington remained resolute. “As Esther said, the fresh air will sober us up. It’s a Covid-safe activity AND you need something to take your mind off the fact that you’ll be sleeping alone tonight!”

“More so now that you’ve just reminded me of it,” Sidney shook his head in dismay. “All right, fine,” he begrudgingly followed his friend out of the room, hoping the rest of his afternoon was more enjoyable than he anticipated it would be.

–––––

Later that evening, Charlotte and Sidney finally had a chance to video chat. She was staying at Trafalgar House and he was at Denham Park, neither wanting to be home alone for any length of time.

Charlotte had heard some details about Sidney’s Bachelor Party when Esther drove Tom, Arthur, and Charlotte’s father back that afternoon. It was clear that all of them had more than a few drinks, so naps were ordered before any work was done on the wedding cake.

Now Charlotte was having her equivalent of a Hen Night with her sisters, while her mother and Mary supervised their husbands in the kitchen. Much as Charlotte wanted to go downstairs and spy on them, speaking with Sidney took precedence.

“How are you?” she hoped he would not be too worse for wear tomorrow.

“Frigid,” he answered unexpectedly.

“That’s not a word I’d ever use to describe you, Sidney!” Alison cackled from the other side of the room. The bottle of rum she’d started on earlier in the day was nearly empty.

Rather than try to silence her sister, Charlotte asked Sidney to “hang on” while she fetched her earbuds. “There,” she said with relief when she had them in, “now they can’t hear you.”

“They can still hear you,” he noted, a bit devilishly. “Better be careful what you say.”

“I’m not worried,” she decided to go sit on the bed, tucking her legs underneath her and propping her phone on a pillow. “This is like when we were first dating,” she grinned, thinking it was a fittingly romantic way to spend the night before their wedding.

“Don’t tell me you’re planning to reinstitute a two-metre rule,” while they did still try to maintain social distancing with strangers, he was glad they no longer had to keep their distance from each other.

“Oh, it wasn’t so bad,” she knew he hated every second of it. “All that longing paid off in the end, didn’t it?” she bit her lip to tease him.

“Mm hmm,” he nodded slowly. “And this little separation today will have exactly the same effect, I assure you.” The eye contact he made conveyed enough heat she doubted he was feeling ‘frigid’ anymore, if he ever really had been.

“So was your day really all that chilly?” now that it was over, she felt she was allowed to ask what the guys had gotten up to.

He huffed his answer, still irked with Babington, “Entirely. Riding on the beach is blustery on a good day, but today it was…” he searched for the word he wanted.

“Invigorating?” she offered a less than helpful suggestion with a giggle.

“Hardly,” he rolled his eyes at her. “I was sure the rain in my face would freeze and create icicles!”

“Aww, poor Sidney,” Charlotte could tell he was angling for sympathy, like he’d done after his Covid booster. “Thoughts of me weren’t enough to keep you warm, huh?”

“Thoughts of you were the only thing that kept me going on the return journey,” he paused to add drama, “into the wind!”

“Oh, that is terrible,” she gave him a verbal pat on the head. “But you’re cozy and comfortable now, aren’t you? Esther said she’d make sure you had a hearty meal tonight and again in the morning.”

“Yes, Esther’s been a gracious hostess,” Sidney was willing to acknowledge that fact. “She even managed to keep me far enough from Babbers so I couldn't strangle him when my fingers thawed out.”

Hearing Charlotte laughing at whatever Sidney had just said peaked her sisters’ curiosity. “That’s like second nature for them, isn’t it?” Katie asked Alison.

“Almost every night, all summer long,” Alison confirmed, wearily. “Charlotte says it made their relationship stronger, and she’s probably right, but let’s just be glad they won’t have time for the sexual tension to build up too much.”

“I think it’s sweet,” Jane could understand how difficult it would have been for Alison as the third wheel when the video chats were happening; they no doubt caused some envy. “It’s obvious they’re meant to be together, so it’s difficult when they’re forced to be apart. Even for a night.”

A knock at the door drew the sisters’ attention. Charlotte was too focused on Sidney to notice it, so Katie got up to see who it was. “Arthur! Hello, what can we do for you?”

“Actually, I’m here with a delivery for you,” he stepped to the side and pulled a room service cart toward the door. There was an ice bucket with a bottle of champagne and a silver dome hiding something the Heywoods could tell was decadent. “Technically, it’s for Charlotte, but I made sure there’s enough for four!”

“Charlotte!” Alison shouted at her sister loudly enough to wake the dead.

From her angle, Charlotte could only see that the door was open but not who was behind it. When the cart came into view, she looked Sidney squarely in the eye, “What have you done?”

“Me?” he asked innocently. “Nothing recently…” his smirk indicated he was choosing his words carefully; considering he’d made the arrangement with Arthur ages ago it wasn’t an untrue statement.

As Arthur made it past the door, he steered over to Charlotte. “Milady,” he said as he approached, “your fiancé would like to share a toast with you. May I?” he picked up the bottle to open it for her.

Alison, Jane, and Katie were all clustered together, watching the show. A few photos were taken, both of Arthur’s theatrics and Charlotte’s expression. Alison even managed to raise her hand up to an angle that got a glimpse of Sidney on Charlotte’s screen, wanting to record every aspect of the romantic gesture for the memory book she was planning to put together as a first anniversary present.

After pouring Charlotte a glass of champagne, Arthur poured three more for the sisters. He also whipped off the silver dome to reveal an assortment of handmade chocolate truffles and mini raspberry trifles that the sisters could enjoy during their evening.

Charlotte thanked Arthur and encouraged her sisters to dig in, before returning her attention fully to Sidney. “It’s all wonderful, Sidney. Thank you.”

Seeing the tears in her eyes, he so wished he could reach out and wipe them away. “You’re worth all the planning and all the special moments I can create, Charlotte. And I am literally counting down the hours until you’re my wife.”

“I love you, Mr. Parker,” she raised her glass toward the screen.

“I love you too, Ms. Heywood,” he clinked his own glass on the screen in response.

🥂

[1] If you’d like to order something from my friend - https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/GallivantScotland

[2] I was writing this chapter during the storm - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-59435965

[3] Sidney’s Plan B is much better thought out than the U.K. government’s - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-59588562

[4] That news broke back in October - https://news.sky.com/story/beyond-a-joke-anger-after-government-refuses-to-back-bid-to-protect-waterways-from-raw-sewage-12444971

[5] As I do my final proofing of the chapters, I keep an eye on the forecasts for Hastings. I then look at the actual radar for ‘Sanditon’ (which, as described by Austen, is between Hastings and Eastbourne) at the exact time outdoor events happen to make sure I’ve described conditions as accurately as possible from six time zones away.

[6] In contrast, on Saturday Ireland limited weddings to 100 guests - https://www.thejournal.ie/wedding-limit-100-5634159-Dec2021/

[7] Georgiana discussed the statue when she first met Charlotte in Chapter Chapter 19 of QA, so her going to the trial is an appropriate follow-up. For more see - https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10303813/Supporters-applaud-cheer-Colston-Four-accused-toppling-slave-trader-statue.html & https://www.itv.com/news/westcountry/2021-12-22/i-knew-bristol-wanted-it-colston-protester-tells-trial

[8] To raise funds for the Colston Four - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-bristol-59620631

[9] It’s not possible for everyone to wait in a queue to get their vaccine, so be sure to do your part for society by getting yours! For more on what the NHS is doing see - https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2021/dec/15/booster-jabs-vulnerable-people-covid-vaccine

[10] I actually did go horseback riding in a snowstorm in the Lake District in January 1993!

Chapter Text

Charlotte: Wedding Week – Day 6

Charlotte: I’m in charge of you today… finally!

Sidney: Aren’t you ALWAYS in charge of me?

Charlotte: The feeling’s mutual, I assure you. ❤️ 

Sidney: I was cold and lonely last night without you. 🙁

Charlotte: It was only one night, Sidney. You obviously survived the deprivation.

Sidney: I’d much rather be depraved with you. 😉

Charlotte: 🙄

Charlotte: I daresay we’ll have plenty of time for that on our honeymoon.

Sidney: Of that you can be certain, darling. ❤️ 

Charlotte: As I thought. 😘 I have lots to do before I see you, so you need to leave me be… for now.

Sidney: All right. Babington and Esther will make sure I don’t get lost.

Charlotte: See you at 1 o’clock! 😍

Sidney: Love you, Charlotte. ❤️ 

Charlotte: Love you, too, Sidney. ❤️ 

–––––

Esther did as she promised Charlotte, insisting Sidney eat something for breakfast whether he wanted to or not. Babington then took him back upstairs so they could get ready for the day, checking occasionally that Sidney had not forgotten to brush his teeth and had everything buttoned correctly. Sidney would never admit it, but his hands had been shaking at times and he was silently grateful that his Best Man was taking such assiduous care of him.

When they arrived at Trafalgar House a little before Noon, it was all Sidney could do to refrain from jumping in the elevator or running up the stairs to see Charlotte. He knew she was probably still getting ready, but that didn’t make it any easier to resist the pull he felt in her direction.

Arthur and Tom helped Esther, trying to keep Sidney’s mind occupied with small talk in the lobby until it was time to head out to the terrace for the ceremony. Babington had disappeared into the bistro, which was still off limits to Sidney until the reception.

Hearing the elevator ding, Sidney’s head snapped in its direction so quickly he was surprised he didn’t injure himself. It was Mary having come down to let them know the bride was ready.

The Parker brothers led the way, holding the doors to the terrace open for Sidney. When he saw how the venue was arranged he was amazed at how such a simple transformation could be so effective in setting a romantic mood. His siblings had done the paperwork to make Trafalgar House an authorized wedding venue during the pandemic, after Diana saw an article about Selfridge’s creating a wedding suite a couple weeks before Sidney met Charlotte, not knowing he would be one of the people to get married here.[1]

He could see Diana and John on opposite sides of the terrace with their phones out, presumably taking photos and videos of everyone’s entrance. Taking the spot Charlotte had marked for him at the front by the registrar who would be officiating, Sidney tried to remain patient while he waited for everyone else to take their places.[2] He stared for a bit at the heart with Charlotte’s name in it and it calmed him. She’d be standing there soon and all would be right in his world again.

Babington walked Esther down the aisle, which was really just a gap between two sets of five chairs. Esther sat on the bride’s side, presumably so she could have a nice view of her husband.

Henry was next, carrying an iPad on a small tripod. When he got close enough, Sidney could see Georgiana on the screen, smiling and waving. Henry handed the contraption off to Esther who placed it on a chair next to her while Henry went to sit on the groom’s side.

Tom then walked Mary down the aisle, dropping her off at the first seat on the groom’s side. They were followed by Arthur, who escorted Caroline to the seat across the aisle on the bride’s side. Once Babington, Tom, and Arthur were standing in their places, Diana came in front of them to take a few more pictures before sitting down next to Mary, while John went to sit next to virtual Georgiana.[3]

Deep breaths, Sidney reminded himself, patting the pocket where Charlotte’s wedding band was. Deep breaths.

Finally, Pachelbel’s Canon in D began playing from the speakers they'd installed around the terrace for Euro 2020. The next figures Sidney saw in the doorway from the lobby were his nieces. He’d assumed Charlotte would ask them to be in the wedding, and the smiles on their faces made his own grow wider. The girls were positively delighted by the fact that they were allowed to scatter rose petals anywhere they wanted. When they made it to the front, they each gave Sidney a hug before going to sit next to their mother.

Charlotte’s sisters came out next, walking at a relatively quick pace that felt excessively slow to Sidney. Katie, Jane, and Alison took their spots across from the men, all grinning at Sidney’s nervousness and wanting to see his face when Charlotte made her big entrance.

When the music shifted to the Wedding March, the seven ‘guests’ stood up to await Charlotte and her father. Alison would later tell Sidney that the sigh of relief he released when he finally saw Charlotte was louder than the music, and he didn’t doubt it. Not that he was truly worried Charlotte would not appear, but when you’ve fallen in love during a pandemic you learn to never take anything for granted.

It was at that moment Sidney decided he finally understood the word ‘breathtaking’ while gazing at his beautiful bride. Charlotte was simply radiant.

As she walked toward her groom, Charlotte was so pleased she hadn’t left out the tradition of having her father walk her down the aisle. Her feminist sensibilities detested the notion of a father ‘giving away’ his daughter to her soon-to-be husband, but she hadn’t wanted to deprive her father of the task, knowing he was merely accompanying her rather than giving her to Sidney like a piece of property. With each step she took, she was tremendously grateful to have his steady presence beside her. She was so excited when she saw Sidney she thought she’d either swoon or run at a sprint to jump into his arms.

George gave his daughter a brief hug before taking his seat next to Caroline. Sidney took Charlotte's hand to tug her to him. Ah, that’s better, they each thought individually.

The music ended, signaling the registrar to take Charlotte and Sidney through the government-proscribed vows.[4] Sidney also took that as his cue to remove the veil from his bride’s face. They hadn’t discussed it, and there’d been no rehearsal, but he felt the need to see her eyes unobstructed. Similarly, Charlotte wanted to hold both his hands, so she gave Alison her bouquet of white and cream roses.

When Sidney said “I declare that I know of no legal reason why I, Sidney James Parker, may not be joined in marriage to Charlotte Rose Heywood,” Alison whooped with joy, prompting laughter from all in attendance.

When Charlotte said, “I, Charlotte Rose Heywood, take thee, Sidney James Parker, to be my wedded husband,” she needed to hand him her new handkerchief because he was the one crying.

Sidney then surprised her totally when putting his wedding band on her finger by reciting some of the traditional Church of England vows, saying “With this Ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow.” Leaning forward he whispered, “I always liked that bit,” and dropped a kiss on her cheek while he was at it.

After Charlotte placed her wedding band on Sidney’s finger, she didn’t bother to wait for the registrar to declare them married before kissing her husband. Everyone confirmed later that the words had been spoken, but she was too invested in their first kiss as a married couple to notice.

Rather than have a formal recessional, everyone milled about on the terrace offering hugs to the happy couple and taking photos of anything and everything. A few paused to admire the handcrafted wedding bands – Charlotte’s had three roses on top, with vines wrapping around like an eternity band and Sidney’s had triangles reminiscent of the roof of the Grand Court at the British Museum, where he’d finally spotted Charlotte again in June.

Eventually some gusts of chilly wind in advance of the day's rain swept almost everyone inside. Nothing had a schedule to it now, so Charlotte and Sidney took a few moments to snuggle and share their thoughts with each other alone on the terrace.

–––––

The bistro was adorned with an unimaginable number of white fairy lights, and two tables would hold the wedding luncheon options available in individual portions to prevent anyone sharing serving utensils. Tom and his kitchen helpers brought out mini pies of salmon or chicken curry or potato and sweetcorn, plus some mince ones too. There were also creamy tomato soup shots that were thankfully more pink than red, the first attempt at the recipe looking far too much like blood for any wedding that wasn’t vampire-themed.

On the dessert table was a set of gingerbread nutcrackers, looking not quite like the bride and groom. George had been working on the design since Week 2 of The Great British Bakeoff and he was proud of how far his piping skills had come in those weeks. There was also a hot cocoa ‘bar’ with various toppings that could be sprinkled or poured in and whipped cream that could be sprayed on top. Everyone was dutiful about using the hand sanitizer placed on the tables, doing what they could to ensure no cloud of Omicron descended on the celebration.

Sidney separated from Charlotte briefly, taking the iPad Georgiana was on from Esther and going in to the lobby to speak with her privately. Charlotte wasn’t sure what that was about, but she was certain she’d find out before too long. When he returned, she motioned to her father that he and Tom should bring out the cake.

Rejoining his wife, Sidney asked her what the commotion was about. “My father and your brother are fetching the cake they made us,” she explained while suppressing a grin.

“My brother… which brother?” he looked around and saw Arthur chatting with John and Diana, and realized Charlotte didn’t need to answer. “This’ll be interesting,” he wrapped an arm around her waist to brace himself for whatever was coming.

When the cart with the cake appeared, Sidney noticed two aspects of it immediately. The gingerbread silhouettes of him and Charlotte on top were elegant simplicity, but the frosting had him confused. He leaned down to ask as quietly as possible, “Is it supposed to look like that?”

“What do you mean?” Charlotte’s brow creased as she answered him equally quietly.

“Are we supposed to be able to see the cake through the frosting like that?” he was trying not to draw attention to their conversation, hoping everyone assumed he was whispering sweet nothings to Charlotte.

“Yes, Sidney,” a smile appeared on Charlotte’s face when she realized her husband’s confusion. “It’s called a naked cake, and they’ve done it perfectly.”

“A naked cake, huh?” half of Sidney’s brain was instantly aroused hearing Charlotte say the word ‘naked’ while the other half was embarrassed by the thought that his brother and new father-in-law had made something called that.

The cake was transferred safely to the dessert table, as was a tray of matching cupcakes should people prefer to eat their gingerbread cake in that form.[5] Charlotte and Sidney cut the cake together, carefully feeding each other a bite off a fork like people do in the movies. The relaxed atmosphere in the room was exactly what Charlotte had hoped for, especially because she had such difficulty imagining a peaceful gathering of Heywoods and Parkers in the first few weeks of their relationship.

Conversations were mostly about the wedding – how much everyone loved Charlotte’s dress, the looks on the bride and groom’s faces while exchanging vows, how nice it was that the rain held off long enough to have the ceremony outside, and so on. There were also questions about the honeymoon that Sidney continued to deflect as he’d been doing all week.

Alison had a different question for him that she was excessively anxious to ask, “Now that you and Charlotte are married, does that mean I’m your favorite Heywood?”

“That depends,” Sidney answered vaguely to frustrate her.

“Depends on what?” she prompted.

“Depends on what song DJ Alison decided on for our first dance,” he smirked at Charlotte who, up until that second, was certain she had maintained complete control over the reception.

“I gave Alison a song list,” she squinted suspiciously at her husband. “Don’t tell me you’re trying to overrule me already, princess,” she tried to say it without smiling and failed completely.

“Well, as it happens,” Alison pulled out her phone and opened the music app that she’d connected to the bistro’s sound system, “you both requested the same song.” Pushing play, John Legend’s ‘All of Me’ came through the speakers and Sidney did not hesitate to lead Charlotte to an open space where they could dance.[6] Alison being Alison only let the song play through the chorus once before it morphed into the dance party remix, at which point she and the children joined Aunt Charlotte and Uncle Sidney on the makeshift dance floor.[7]

They danced to a few more songs before Charlotte checked the time on her phone and realized it would be dark soon. She and Sidney should really get on the road to London so they could continue celebrating in private.

Remembering her sisters’ comment about her dress, Charlotte could feel a blush rising on her cheeks. Alison must have seen it, as the next song to come on was Daft Punk’s ‘Get Lucky’. Laughing aloud, Charlotte pulled Sidney down so she could speak in his ear. “Want to come upstairs and help me out of my dress?”

“I thought you’d never ask,” he winked roguishly.

–––––

In the elevator, Sidney managed to loosen the laces on the back of the dress while his lips never left Charlotte’s. When the doors opened, he scooped her up to carry her to the room they’d shared their first kiss in back in July.

“How’d you know which room I was staying in?” she asked as she fumbled to open the app that would allow her to unlock the door.

“It’s our room, where else would you stay?” he didn’t wait for her to respond, capturing her lips with his once again.

As he carried her inside, he could feel her squirming to be set down. “Impatient, Mrs. Parker?” he teased, letting her legs go so she could stand.

“Don’t pretend you’re not, Mr. Parker,” she grabbed his lapels and practically dragged him to the bed. “If we want to get to Bedford Place at a reasonable hour, this needs to be a quickie!” she explained, unzipping his trousers faster than she’d ever done before.

“Well then,” he tugged at the neckline of her loosened dress, with a smirk.

–––––

Either Alison was clairvoyant or she had a GPS tracking app on Charlotte and/or Sidney’s phones. When the doors of the elevator opened bringing them back to the ground floor after their interlude upstairs, she had Bitter:Sweet’s ‘Being Bad’ blaring through the speakers.

“How’d she manage that?” Sidney questioned the timing, his hand at the small of Charlotte’s back to escort her back into their reception. “Or do you think she’s been playing similar songs the whole time we were upstairs?”

“Anything’s possible,” Charlotte stopped their progress to double-check her hair one last time in the mirror in the hallway, to make sure it wasn’t too mussed. “She’s been planning for this day longer than I have.”

“Sidlotte was an inevitability, on that Alison and I have always agreed,” he took hold of her hand and tucked it under his arm, walking the remaining distance into the bistro.

Alison let the music end when the song did, knowing that Sidney and Charlotte were about to depart for London.

“Thank you, Alison,” he nodded to her.

“Your favorite Heywood?” she replied cheekily.

“Yes, from this day forward my favorite Heywood,” he agreed with a bemused smile.

Charlotte bit her lip to not laugh at the exchange. She wouldn’t remind either of them that her passport would still say ‘Charlotte Heywood’ until well into the new year, having decided with Sidney to wait on the necessary paperwork to get a new one issued rather than requesting it before they married.[8] Neither wanted to jinx today.

“And thank you to everyone else for all you’ve done to support Charlotte and me,” Sidney looked around at all the smiling faces. “We’re so glad you were willing to let our wedding intrude on your Christmas, and we hope you continue celebrating after we head out.”

“You know we will!” Babington raised a glass of champagne to the happy couple. The informality of the event meant no toasts, but he’d see to it that everyone enjoyed the reception well into the night.

They circulated through the room, giving farewell hugs to those who wanted them. Happy Christmas wishes being exchanged along with additional wedding congratulations. Sidney also reassured everyone who asked that he’d let them know the honeymoon destination, Arthur and Babington no longer being the only ones who were clamoring with curiosity about it.

Charlotte handed her bouquet to Alison, there being no need to risk injury to the other single ladies by throwing it when Alison was determined to catch it. In exchange, Alison queued up the next song – one of Charlotte’s favorites – to play as she and Sidney left to start their married life together. Charlotte gave her an extra tight squeeze as Emeli Sandé’s ‘Next to Me’ began to play, she then took Sidney’s hand and they headed out to his car.

–––––

After a rainy, but otherwise uneventful, drive the newlyweds entered Bedford Place. Sidney was mentally reminding himself of all his plans for their evening, not wanting to get distracted by his bride and forget anything. Their ‘quickie’ at Trafalgar House had tided them over, he supposed, but he was nowhere near done with Charlotte Parker.

“Why is there a lock on my suitcase?” Charlotte asked as Sidney shook the rain off his umbrella. She wasn’t surprised to see their luggage was here, but the lock was a new addition.

“To prevent peeking,” Sidney set the umbrella down to help her out of her coat, then saw to his own, placing them both on the coat tree next to the luggage.

“I see, well I guess I’ll have to get the information about our honeymoon out of my husband, then,” she drew him to her. “Interrogations can be such fun,” she raised her eyebrows suggestively.

“I look forward to it,” he grinned. “But first, close your eyes.”

“Close my eyes?”

“Yes, close them,” he kissed the tip of her nose to encourage her. Once her lids were shut, he scooped her in his arms again, an action he was sure he’d never tire of. He walked to the drawing room and stood so her face was toward the tree. “Okay, you can open them now.”

“Another tree!” she should have guessed he'd do that. Charlotte's mind shifted to caution, as it so often did, “Please tell me the lights haven't been on since Tuesday.”

“Uh, no,” he set her down so she could walk closer to it. “They’re on a timer.”

“Very sensible,” she smiled in relief. Of course Sidney would think of that too. When she was close enough to the tree, the gasp of delight Sidney hoped to elicit finally emerged. “My ornaments!” he’d also never tire of seeing her so delighted.

“Well, it’s our first Christmas together…” he was unable to finish his sentence, his arms being suddenly full of Charlotte. After a thorough thank you kiss, they paused for air. Sidney took the opportunity to slow the pace of their evening. “I take it you like your surprise.”

“You knew I would,” she smiled flirtatiously. “I’m guessing there are more surprises in store for me tonight too, aren’t there?”

“Possibly,” he took her face in his hands. “We’re in no rush, Mrs. Parker. Perhaps you’d like to take a nice hot bath and relax for a while, you’ve definitely earned it after all your planning.”

“Ooh, that sounds lovely,” she’d only used the bathtub in his room – correction, their room – once during their stay here in September and it was heavenly.

“Let’s head up,” he took her hand. “Once you’re settled, I’ll come back down and fix us something to eat.”

When Sidney moved straight through the bedroom into the bathroom to start the water for her bath, she knew he was up to something. Yes, a bath would be wonderful, but him delaying making love to his wife or even taking the opportunity to help her undress heightened her suspicions. She’d play along, as he’d done so well this week, and all would reveal itself eventually.

She took off her clothes and put on the silk robe she’d left here the last time they visited, joining him in the bathroom just as he turned the faucet off. “Smells delicious,” she noted the scent of sugar cookies coming from the water. “Christmassy.”

“Indeed,” he chuckled, testing the water to make sure it was an appropriate temperature. He then stood up and held a hand out to her, offering to assist her into the tub.

Wanting to test her theory, Charlotte toyed with the sash on her robe. “Sure you don’t want to join me?”

“Maybe later,” he said in a manner that told her he would be joining her in the bath before too long.

“All right, if you insist,” she took off her robe and grasped his hand, him keeping her steady as she lowered herself into the water.

Before he left, he went to get something out of a gift bag that was sitting on the sink. “These are for you,” he held out a satin mask to cover her eyes and a set of wireless earbuds.

She considered the items as she accepted them from him. “I’m not even going to try to guess,” she put the earbuds in first and heard nothing. “Sure they’re working?”

“Yep,” he nodded. “Put your mask on, darling. You need to relax,” his eyes widened as he said it, obviously intent on helping her ‘relax’ in more ways than one.

Saying nothing further, she put the mask over her eyes and leaned back in the tub. Feeling a quick kiss from Sidney on her forehead, she could then hear the bathroom door click shut and his retreating footsteps out into the hallway.

After about five minutes, she could feel the earbuds come to life. A moment later, Sidney’s voice was practically enveloping her. “You read me this story, once upon a time, and I’ve decided to return the favor. Only this time, we’ll get to find out what happens next.”

There was a pause in the recording, during which Charlotte tried to rapidly recall the stories she’d read him over the summer. There was one where Charlotte fell through the ice and needed to warm up in the bath, was that what he’d read? Ooh, she hoped so. When he spoke next he read a different title, which she quickly realized made even more sense than her first guess: “A Little Before Midnight.”[9]

–––––

Sidney enjoyed recording the story for Charlotte, it being one aspect of their courtship that had been entirely her domain up until now. He knew precisely when he needed to be back upstairs for the finale – some additions he made to the story himself - and had just enough time to turn on the oven and put in the apple pie Caroline made for them, so it would be ready for a midnight snack later. It was another reminder of the stories Charlotte had tormented him with this summer, and he knew they’d both enjoy having him turn the tables on her tonight.

Since he was controlling the playback on his phone, he could see where she was at in the story. Time to head up, he thought as he set another timer on his phone to let him know when the pie was done baking.

Reentering the bedroom, he took off his shirt and rejoined her in the bathroom. He crouched down next to her in the tub, just as Sidney did in the story. Rather than kissing her, though, he traced his hand along her collarbone.

Charlotte’s sudden surprise at the feel of Sidney’s hand on her skin, while his voice narrated each and every move he made, was the most erotic experience she could imagine. He was an absolute master of surprise, and she melted so completely she was certain she’d float away. The kisses and caresses he bestowed were feather light, but each one turned her on more than the last. It was blissful torture, and she loved every second of it.

Finally, Sidney’s voice told her he was going to kiss her and she found herself straining toward him, eager to have his lips on hers. The earbuds went silent the moment Sidney’s hands were in her hair, desperately kissing her as though he’d never had the chance before.

Too soon for her liking, he brought an end to the kiss and took the earbuds out. He then stood up so he could help her from the tub. Not wanting to break the spell by speaking, she allowed him to silently towel her dry. Their kisses resumed midway through, and it was not long before they tumbled into bed together.

The alarm on Sidney’s phone would eventually signal his next surprise, but thankfully the oven had an automatic shut off so the pie would not burn. It, like everything associated with Charlotte, Sidney had learned, would be well worth the wait.

🔥 

[1] “Selfridges granted licence to host weddings” - https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-london-57070310

[2] Charlotte and Sidney are having a civil ceremony (I established back in QA that neither is a regular churchgoer) - https://www.hitched.co.uk/wedding-planning/organising-and-planning/how-to-get-married/

[3] The audience from bride’s side to groom’s side is: John, Georgiana, Esther, George, Caroline, Mary, Alicia, Jenny, Henry, Diana.

[4] Those of the Marriage Ceremony (Prescribed Words) Act 1996 in particular - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marriage_vows

[5] Here’s the recipe - https://janeausten.co.uk/blogs/desserts/gingerbread-cakes

[6] See Chapter 24 of QA for the significance (which Sidney and Charlotte will have discussed in the meantime).

[7] Here’s the remix - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbtLqVoMWdQ

[8] In the UK you can apply for a name change three months before your wedding - https://www.gov.uk/changing-passport-information/name-marriage-and-civil-partnership

[9] She read him most of the stories in Chapter 17 of QA, including this one - https://archiveofourown.org/works/30062451

Chapter Text

“Wedding Week, Day 7,” Charlotte stretched beside her husband, her hand running down his arm so she could interlace their fingers. “I officially hand all control of our schedule over to you, Mr. Parker.”

“And here I was getting used to you being in charge all the time,” Sidney brought their joined hands to his mouth for a kiss. He then used them to propel her over onto her back before kissing her more thoroughly.

Some minutes later, he added, “And Happy Christmas to you, Mrs. Parker.” Kissing her neck next, followed by the hollow at the base of her throat.

“Mmm, I like the sound of that,” Charlotte purred like a contented kitten. “Charlotte Parker has a nice ring to it.”

“Charlotte Parker has nice everything,” Sidney mumbled into her skin.

“So… Mr. Parker,” she tried to formulate a question, “what’s on our agenda today?”

“I intend to spend the entire day reaffirming our vows,” she could feel him grin as he said it.

“They already need to be reaffirmed?” Charlotte had not expected him to say that. “We haven’t even been married a full day yet.” Her hands were in his hair, so she tugged him up to look in his eyes.

The intensity she found there was enough to take her breath away. He licked his lips before answering her. “With my body, I thee worship,” he recited his favorite line of the vows, “I take those words very seriously, Mrs. Parker.” Descending to taste her neck again, he smoothed a hand down to her bottom in order to pull her even closer to him.

Enjoying his attentions immensely, Charlotte was disappointed when her stomach rumbled to let them both know she was hungry. “Sorry, about that,” she apologized with a giggle. “Perhaps we should press pause on one hunger to satisfy a different one.”

–––––

Upon entering the kitchen, wearing nothing more than their robes, Sidney went to the oven to see the state of the pie he’d all but forgotten about last night. Although it was certainly on the toasty side, it wasn’t technically burnt. “Pie, darling?” he asked as he set it on the island.

“What the…” Charlotte’s astonished expression told him she recognized the baker. “Did my mother make that?”

“She did,” he acknowledged. “I picked it up from her on Tuesday, along with the ornaments.” He moved toward the coffeemaker. “I put it in the oven last night while you were in the tub, and thankfully the automatic shut off prevented any sort of calamity from occurring while we were otherwise engaged.”

“Thankfully,” she couldn’t believe he’d risked it, what with the Parker family’s history with fire. “Shall we have some now?” she went to the cupboard to get plates, while Sidney continued preparing the coffee.

“Sounds delicious,” he agreed as he reached for her waist, “and I believe there’s some whipped cream too; we want to do this right, Mrs. Parker.”

“I do like the way you think, Mr. Parker,” she ran her hands up his back and pressed herself against him. “We should have more than pie for breakfast, however.”

“Waffles? Eggs? Bacon?” he asked in rapid succession. “I made sure to get all your favorites, so whatever you want I’ll gladly make.”

Charlotte inhaled with an aura of satisfaction. “I knew I’d love being married to you. How about all of the above? I worked up quite an appetite last night.”

“As did I, Charlotte. As did I,” they proceeded to make breakfast together as they did most mornings, it feeling both like any other day and not at the same time. The pie was an unusual addition to the meal, certainly, but when you’re on your honeymoon you can do what you like.

–––––

After breakfast, they moved to the drawing room to enjoy the Christmas tree with another cup of coffee. Charlotte could see that there were a couple presents underneath and realized Sidney had broken their agreement not to get each other anything.

“I thought we decided we were gifts enough for each other, Sidney,” she sipped her coffee, tilting her head toward the items under the tree and waiting for him to explain his way around it.

“That we did, which is why I bought you nothing,” the smug look on his face being one step short of a grin. Bending down he read from the tag on the top package, “It says, ‘To Charlotte, From Santa’.”

Charlotte sat down on the sofa, while she tried not to smile. “If you say so, Sidney,” she shook her head slightly. “I guess I’d better open them, huh?”

“An excellent idea, Mrs. Parker,” he’d lost count of how many times he’d already called her that, but had no intention of stopping. “Here you go,” he handed her the largest one first.

“Santa’s handwriting looks amazingly like yours,” she noted as she set down her mug so she could unwrap the gift. Ripping the paper off and crumpling it into a ball, she threw it playfully at her husband who caught it deftly. When she removed the lid from the box she found a cashmere blanket, with an intertwined C and S embroidered on it. “Oh my, that’s soft,” she ran a hand over the letters. “Well done, Santa.” She took it out and spread it across her lap.

“Hmm, Santa has good taste, doesn’t he?” he reached over and stroked her leg through the blanket.

“Santa didn’t need to give you an excuse to feel me up, you know,” she flirted in response, his antics being as charming as ever.

“Okay, next one,” he handed her a small poster tube with bows stuck to either end of it.

“Think Santa wants me to open this from a particular end?”

He scrunched his face like he was thinking about it before saying, “I don’t think it matters.”

She took the bow off one end and leaned forward to stick it on Sidney’s head, then popped the end cap off the tube. He helped her by holding it steady while she pulled the contents out. When she unrolled it, she was momentarily stunned by what she saw. In Sidney’s handwriting, along a horizontal scroll, was their families’ lineage from the days of Jane Austen. All the Parkers that led to Sidney and all the Heywoods that led to Charlotte.[1] At the end of the line, he’d sketched the two of them sitting together at the table in the garden where they’d had their first conversation.

While she collected her thoughts, Sidney leaned forward to brush the tears on her cheeks away, knowing she would not want to get any on the scroll. As he did, she managed to say something to her husband, “That Santa put his elves to a lot of work on this one.”

“The elves enjoyed it,” Sidney told her with a warm smile. “Made a nice change from dolls and train sets.”

“I’ll bet,” she began rolling it back up so it could be put back in the tube for safekeeping, she’d study it more closely later. “It’s going to need a frame.”

“There may or may not be a frame waiting for it in Sanditon,” he held the tube out so she could slide the parchment inside.

“Of course there is,” she imagined he’d arranged for one of his siblings to come here while they were on their honeymoon and see that it was framed and hung in their house by the time they returned; on the wall leading to the back garden, if she were to guess. “Are you going to fetch me the third gift?” she looked at him expectantly.

“The third gift?” he questioned her as he looked under the tree again. She leaned toward him, reaching out to put a finger under his chin. “Up there,” she lifted his head so he could see a third package tucked into the branches about halfway up that neither of them had noticed in the darkened room the night before.

“Oh!” he seemed genuinely surprised. Standing to go see what it was, he found it also read ‘To Charlotte, From Santa’ but the handwriting was nothing like his. “Looks like Santa may have been drunk when he wrote the tag.”

He handed it to her as he sat back down, and she started laughing when she saw the handwriting. “Possibly drunk. Definitely Alison.”

“Ah ha,” Sidney knew Alison could give him a run for the money when it came to surprises, if she ever had the chance. “She must have had Arthur sneak it in.”

When Charlotte took the lid off the box, she had to suppress a naughty grin. The gift inside was as much for Sidney as it was for her – a headband to which Alison had attached copious amounts of mistletoe. Wanting to heighten the temptation for Sidney, Charlotte told him to close his eyes before she took it out of the box. She stood up, wrapped the new blanket around her shoulders then put the headband on. Moving in front of him, she climbed onto his lap before telling him he could open his eyes.

Sidney's hands moved to her hips as he looked up at her. Taking in the scene, he realized they were now in the coziest of cocoons. Seeing the mistletoe he knew Alison had proven to be the perfect wingman once again, to both him and Charlotte. “I thought we weren’t supposed to snog under the mistletoe this year,” he teased, his fingers caressing her seductively.[2]

“Strangers. We’re not supposed to snog strangers under the mistletoe,” Charlotte traced his bottom lip. “Luckily, you are my husband now.”

“That is extremely lucky,” he began to bridge the small distance between them, “for both of us.” He kissed her slowly knowing they had the entire afternoon to make thorough use of the mistletoe.[3]

–––––

By evening, Charlotte and Sidney were in need of more sustenance, so Sidney made them a stir-fry of chicken and veggies. They had not bothered to put on anything more than their robes, finding the easy access a real time saver when they started feeling amorous again.

“Are you really not going to tell me where we’re going on our honeymoon until tomorrow?” Charlotte had not resorted to tickling to get information from him, but would if needed.

“No, wife, I’m not,” he smirked, stirring the ingredients in the sizzling hot wok. “But we should discuss whether you want to go with Honeymoon Plan A or shift to either Plan B or C.”

“You have a Plan B and C? Wait, what am I saying, of course you have multiple backup plans,” Charlotte got out both forks and chopsticks, not certain if they’d want to take their time with dinner or rush through it.

“We’re in a pandemic, darling,” he said with slight dramatic flair. “So even if I weren’t an over-planning sort of person, having backup plans is sort of a must these days.”

“Very good point,” she nodded in affirmation. “I’m not sure how I can decide between what I’m sure are three wonderfully romantic plans if I don’t know what they each entail, though. So you’re going to have to spill at least a few details.” She went to get a bottle of white wine from the fridge.

“Okay…” he considered what he’d divulge. “Plan A is your typical get on a plane and fly somewhere honeymoon. Plan B is we stay here at Bedford Place, though that’s my least favorite option since that’s how we celebrated our engagement.”

“That was a pretty spectacular celebration,” she reminded him, not that he needed reminding.

“It was, and I’d gladly recreate each moment of it,” he inhaled sharply at whatever image popped into his mind from that week.

Giggling at his expression, she brought them back to the subject they were discussing, “And Plan C?”

“Right, focus,” he grinned as he turned off the burner. He began putting the stir-fry into their bowls on the kitchen island. “Plan C is we rent a car, take the groceries from the fridge, and drive back to Sanditon incognito to hole up at Georgiana’s for as long as we want. Our family won’t know we’re there, and we can send them the occasional texts letting them know how much we’re enjoying our honeymoon – which will be true, regardless of where we spend it.”

“Is this what you were talking with Georgiana about when you left the reception yesterday?” she took a bite of her dinner while she awaited his answer.

“You noticed that, did you?” he reached for the wine to open it. “Yes, I was confirming that Plan C was still a go, in case you don’t feel comfortable flying.” Before Charlotte could say anything, he continued, “I did consider making us a reservation someplace else here in Britain, but everywhere seemed just as dangerous with respect to Omicron. And at Georgiana’s we can trust that no one’s stayed there who was positive and we won’t have to see other people.”

“All sensible thoughts, husband,” she took his hand, letting him know she appreciated the amount of worry he’d obviously put into everything. “Aside from the airports and flight, won’t we be seeing people with Plan A too?” If she could trick him into giving away a few more tidbits about what he’d planned for their ideal honeymoon, she would.

Seeing what she was trying to do, he decided to tempt her with another detail, “Not really, no. I’ve rented us a villa that will be fully stocked with food, so no need to go anywhere we don’t want to.”

“A villa?” her eyebrows rose as she said it. “Sounds romantic. And is this villa located someplace relatively Covid-safe?”

“Only two reported cases of Omicron as of this morning, though, admittedly, that may be because they’re not doing much genomic sequencing,” despite how tight the country’s precautions had remained since the summer, he remained impressed there was little-to-no local transmission of Omicron at their prospective destination... yet.[4]

“So, our choices are a fully stocked villa in a country with two cases of Omicron, or a partially stocked house in a country with over a million cases of Omicron?”[5]

“Don’t forget about the getting to and from,” he cautioned her. “If that concerns you for either Plan A or C, we could always stay right where we are for the duration.”

“Mm hmm, Plan B,” she showed him she’d followed all three of his meticulously thought out plans as he explained them to her. “One final question – for now…”

He smiled, knowing there were likely to be dozens more before they actually came to a final decision. “Will proof of vaccination be required when we land at our destination for Plan A? I mean, are they taking the pandemic seriously?”

“Pretty sure that was two questions, Mrs. Parker,” he teased. “To answer both, yes, I had to fill out a form in advance with our proof of vaccination and we’ll have to show it to the health officials when we land because they’ve been taking it seriously throughout. They’re also requiring everyone to be masked in all public spaces, and are instituting a curfew for all establishments, not that I expect we’ll spend much time out in public.”

“Ooh…” her eyes sparkled. “So we’re talking another self-imposed quarantine, are we?”

“Well, I’ve booked the villa for a fortnight,” he once flirted with her by saying they should take an exceptionally long honeymoon and it was clear he intended to go through with it.[6] “And we can always extend our stay, if we decide it would be unsafe to return to England.”[7]

Charlotte knew only a privileged few could have such a conversation. Her responsible side told her to feel guilty for considering it, when many people around the world did not even have access to vaccines.[8]

They continued to eat in silence while Charlotte pondered the options, Sidney understanding she needed time to process. A honeymoon wasn’t essential travel, so Charlotte’s cautious side was telling her not to take the chance. Her romantic side was shouting even more loudly, plus it was reminding her how much effort Sidney had gone to in order to create what was likely to be both as romantic and safe as he could make it.

As she swallowed her last bite, she came to a conclusion. “I think Plan C is definitely out,” she started slowly to draw out his suspense. “Everyone’s been so curious about where you’re taking me, and I’d hate to lie to them about it.”

“But we could take clever selfies so they wouldn’t have to find out,” he really had tried to think through everything, hadn’t he?

“But what if there’s an earthquake or volcano or something in the place we tell them we are?” those were possibilities he hadn’t considered. “We don’t want them to worry about us, even for a short time.”

“Okay, no Plan C,” he agreed, reaching for her hand as he awaited her verdict.

Charlotte noticed he appeared to be holding his breath slightly. “I’d like to go for Plan A,” she said with determination. “We’re triple vaxxed, we’ve got our masks and our hand sanitizer and I’m sure you’ve thought of eventualities I haven’t,” she said quickly, as if still trying to convince herself. “And after such an unconventional courtship and restricted wedding, I’d like one aspect of our relationship to be more… normal.”

“Plan A it is then,” he squeezed her hand gently. “Though if you change your mind before morning, please tell me. Or if you do when we get to the airport, you say the word and we’ll be back to the safety of Bedford Place ASAP. Okay?”

“Duly noted.” The tears that formed in her eyes were the happiest ones of the day, hearing his heartfelt concern for her concerns, as always. “I love you, Sidney Parker.”

“And I love you, Charlotte Parker.”

❤️ 

[1] Complete with birth and death dates underneath each name, but I really didn’t want to put the word ‘death’ in the story. Charlotte will be extra impressed that Sidney used Census data to track the history, which is exactly why Sidney did it!

[2] An actual comment from a U.K. government minister - https://planetradio.co.uk/free/uk/news/avoid-kisses-under-the-mistletoe-this-christmas-says-suffolk-mp/

[3] I’m assuming that the romantic meaning of mistletoe is understood enough internationally that I don’t need to explain it. I know it’s not a tradition in France, where an entire paragraph explaining it had to be added to a chapter I had published in a book there in 2004. But Hollywood and fanfic should have provided plenty of examples in the last couple of decades.

[4] There’s likely a lot more Omicron around the world than we realize - https://edition.cnn.com/2021/12/09/health/coronavirus-genomic-sequencing-intl-cmd/index.html

[5] I kept updating this sentence during the last month. It started at dozens of cases, then became hundreds, then thousands, then tens of thousands, then hundreds of thousands. Sad that it made it past a million in such a short space of time. 😢 #GetVaxxed #WearADamnMask

[6] In Chapter 15 of QA during their ‘quarantine’ in Trafalgar House.

[7] Their honeymoon destination remain a surprise until the final footnote in tomorrow’s chapter! Sidney's monitoring their local news (as is your author, obviously). The newlyweds will also need to follow the rules for testing in order to return to the UK - https://www.bbc.com/news/explainers-52544307

[8] For more see - https://apnews.com/article/coronavirus-pandemic-health-business-pandemics-united-nations-8b905abb40bc168227a13802a411888b

Chapter Text

“Where are we going?” Charlotte was snuggled next to her husband, as the train pulled out of Paddington Station. His arm was wrapped around her, his fingers caressing the back of her neck to soothe any nerves she might be having about their journey. It had been difficult to leave the lovely bubble that was Bedford Place this morning, but they were both anticipating the new bubble they'd establish on their honeymoon.

“To the airport,” was his cheeky reply. Like several of his plans for her since they reconnected in London in June, he’d booked their flight hoping she’d consider it safe enough to travel during the ongoing pandemic. He knew she’d done the same thing in booking a ticket for that Nero exhibition at the British Museum, and he thought again how truly compatible they were as a couple.

“Yes…” she drew out the word, “and where will we go from there?” She pulled back to look at him, so he knew she wanted a serious answer this time. Her efforts to find out their destination earlier had been too easily derailed by Sidney’s mouth silencing hers, so now was her chance to question him thoroughly, their masks preventing him from kissing her quiet.

“An island,” he remained vague, wanting to maintain the surprise as long as possible. She’d been trying to get it out of him all morning, but as he’d managed to resist her formidable charms thus far he had no intention of giving in now.

“We’re already on an island,” she nestled back into him. He couldn’t see her pout, yet she knew he could hear it. He could feel her fingertips slip inside his coat to stroke his chest and realized she was upping her level of persuasion.

Impressed with her persistence, he decided to give her a hint. “Okay, a smaller island,” he barely narrowed it down at all, his breathing getting slightly more erratic as he spoke.

“And we’re taking a plane there?” despite their conversation last night, she wouldn’t put it past him to use the Heathrow Express as a diversion. She wouldn’t mind being holed up with Sidney on Anglesey or Skye or anywhere, for that matter.

“Obviously,” he teased her suspicious nature. Her wordless response was to slide her hand toward his belt buckle.

“Is clothing optional there?” Charlotte thought a risqué question might breach his defenses.

“I believe it’s customary for clothing to always be optional on one’s honeymoon,” Sidney again reminded her of the obvious.

“You know what I’m asking,” Charlotte groaned, “if it’s going to be hot where we’re going?”

“It will undoubtedly be hot, but that would be true regardless of our destination.”

Letting out a sigh of frustration, she sat up and looked him directly in the eye with determination emanating from her. “Antigua? Cuba? Cyprus? Hawaii? Iceland? Ireland?” she started rattling off the names of islands in alphabetical order, trying to see if she could spot the answer in his expression. “Jamaica? Madagascar? No, wait, that’s bigger than Britain, isn’t it.”[1]

“An island off the coast of southern Africa might be a tad unsafe, currently,” Sidney noted, as she knew he’d chosen what he felt was a Covid-safe destination for their journey.[2]

Not fazed by the interruption, Charlotte picked up where she left off. “Malta? Manhattan? Newfoundland? Puerto Rico? Sardinia? Sicily?” Sidney was amazed at how quickly her mind was bouncing around the globe. “Sri Lanka? St. Helena? Tasmania? The Isle of Wight?”

“We’d take a ferry to the Isle of Wight,” he interjected, “though considering how close it is to Sanditon, we should definitely go check it out one of these days. I hear they have a fabulous donkey sanctuary.”[3]

“Already planning more trips, I like it,” she trailed her fingers along the edge of his mask, flirtatiously.

Sidney gave away nothing; instead pulled her back into his embrace to minimize what she was able to do with her hands. “How about I tell you that one of your many guesses was correct?”[4] He chuckled when she gave him another exasperated sigh.

“Now I wish I hadn’t been so quick with my guesses,” she pouted again, while running the options through her brain once more. “Well, eliminating Madagascar and the Isle of Wight, I’d be happy with any of the rest.” She peeked up at him, and could tell he was not going to say anything further. “Of course, we could take a walk in a park and it would be memorable,” she repeated what she’d told him during their first official date.

“Everything I’ve got planned for us in the coming days certainly would be memorable in a park,” he fed her imagination. “It would also get us arrested for indecent exposure.”

“Glad we’re thinking along the same lines, Mr. Parker,” Charlotte kissed his mask through her own then hugged him tightly. She wasn’t done trying to get information out of him and tried one last approach. “What are you looking forward to doing most… outside the bedroom, that is?”

“Nice try, Mrs. Parker,” he laughed. “But I can answer you honestly without giving away our destination. The thing I’m most looking forward to outside the bedroom is hot showers… with you, if you behave yourself!”

“As if you’d ever refuse me joining you in the shower,” she melted more completely into him. “I’ll be on my best behavior from now on, though, I promise,” the teasing tone let him know she was formulating some additional plans of her own.

“I’ll believe that when I see it, Charlotte,” he adored being able to hold her close now, remembering their first train ride when the most contact they had was her playing footsie with him. “You’ve been a minx since the day we met, even if you’re remarkably good at hiding it.”

“And you, Sidney Parker, have been obsessed with me every day since,” she interlaced her fingers with his, ending her efforts to interrogate him. “You can be absolutely certain I’ll use that fact to my advantage every day from this day forward.”

“Please do, Charlotte,” he loved every aspect of the life they were building together. “Please do.” They enjoyed the remainder of the short train journey to Heathrow in silence, secure in the belief that the happily ever after they began in May would continue getting better.

✈️ 

[1] We learned in QA that Charlotte’s degree is in Human Geography, so I’d argue this is completely doable for her. ;)

[2] There's actually been no Omicron reported in Madagascar so far, though Sidney drawing attention to the part of the planet where it was first identified is logical. For a couple of good global Covid-trackers see - https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2021/health/coronavirus-variant-tracker.html & https://graphics.reuters.com/world-coronavirus-tracker-and-maps/

[3] Is this why the Sanditon writers included the stipulation in Lady Denham’s will? - https://www.iowdonkeysanctuary.org/ (Fun fact: In Chapter 5 of Austen’s manuscript, Sidney’s “scheme to the I. of Wight has not taken place.”)

[4] They’re going to Malta, which has consistently had one of the highest vaccination rates in Europe since July! For more on Malta’s Covid guidelines & vaccination data see - https://www.visitmalta.com/en/covid-19/ & https://timesofmalta.com/articles/view/covid-cases-in-hospital-rise-to-80-as-69-year-old-woman-dies.923878