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Liverpool stretched and got out of his bed. It was a peaceful morning in the Barclays neighbourhood. Liverpool decided to go outside, he saw Tottenham and Swansea chatting by the pond. Liverpool hoped that today would be peaceful.
However, the silence and peace were soon broken, as a scream was heard. It was Manchester City. What made him scream was simply nothing more than a dead rat on his porch.
Shortly after, Arsenal was out of his house, fixing his hair on his porch, looking a little bit annoyed because his sleep was disturbed. Swansea and Tottenham rushed to see if there was a commotion.
Manchester City glared at Arsenal, pointing an accusing finger at him and asked, "did you do this?"
Arsenal rolled his eyes and said, "look, mate. I may hate you but why would I even bother? I have better things to do… like sleeping." Arsenal shrugged.
"Then who did?!" Manchester City shouted. He was starting to sound like an angry teenage girl now (according to Arsenal anyway).
"Probably Manchester United." Arsenal speculated, not really caring about what was happening.
As if on cue, Manchester United came out, swiftly running past his brother, poking him with his pitchfork.
"Speaking of the devil," Arsenal said, the other clubs looked at Arsenal and raised their eyebrows, Liverpool looked amused, "no pun intended?" Arsenal added.
"Gotcha!" Manchester United exclaimed, laughing obnoxiously after.
"How dare you?! I shall report you to your manager!" Manchester City said through gritted teeth.
Manchester United's grin was still there on his face, he leaned against his pitchfork and he said, "it's just a rat. No big deal."
Manchester City looked for anything he could find, he found a rock, so he threw it at Manchester United. Unfortunately, his aim was no good and it went right through Chelsea's bedroom window.
"OI!" The west London club peeked out of the broken window, his hair wasn't slicked back, and so he looked like an actual lion, making both Arsenal and Tottenham snort.
"Oh boy... Can't be good." Liverpool muttered.
Chelsea pointed at Arsenal and asked, "did you do this?!”
Arsenal groaned, "I didn't do it! It was City!"
Manchester City pointed at Manchester United and said, "he caused me to do so! Besides… it was his fault for dodging."
"My fault?! You're the one who took it too seriously!" Manchester United shot back, crossing his arms.
Not able to hold it back anymore, Manchester City lunged at his brother, and the two clubs are soon on the ground, wrestling each other.
"And they say we're violent..." Arsenal muttered, referring to himself and Tottenham.
"Yeah, well. Most of the violence is from you and your fans..." Muttered Tottenham.
"Excuse me?" Arsenal snapped and turned towards Tottenham. Arsenal gave him a glare and said, "your fans are violent too. And YOU are the one who's always picking a fight with me."
"Yeah? You reckon? Well, you're just an arse." Tottenham shot back.
"Rottenham!"
"Arse-nal!"
"Why, I do have a nice arse, thanks."
"That's not what I meant!"
"Whatever. I'll take it as a compliment, thanks." Arsenal said as he walked away, looks like he's not looking forward to getting into trouble. Not now anyway.
Liverpool sighed, walking over to the pond.
Later that afternoon, Manchester City shook the neighbourhood once again with that voice of his, "OH MY GOD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!"
"Look! I was going to apologise by baking you scones!" Manchester United protested. He felt that his brother should have appreciated his efforts.
With a sarcastic tone, Manchester City replied, "yes I know, thank you, dear brother," just when Manchester United was about to smile, Manchester City yelled again, "But not in MY kitchen! Look at my oven! It's all dirty!"
Manchester United rolled his eyes and said, "Why do you have an oven if you don't use it?"
"None of your business. Now go home." Manchester City growled. He pushed the other Manchester club out of his house.
“Fine… fine.” Manchester United said with a sly grin on his face.
Liverpool was lying down near the pond, he attempted to take a nap for the past few hours, but all he could hear is Arsenal and Tottenham’s bickering, as well as Chelsea--who was sitting next to him--going on and on about how he is the greatest English club to have ever been founded. Liverpool closed his eyes, hoping that he could go through the afternoon without a headache. His expectation was crushed. The bickering of the North London clubs got louder.
"You? A better team? Please! I have more titles than you! You always finish underneath me, too!” Arsenal screamed.
“I am older! I am better!” Tottenham screamed, equally as loud.
“You don’t even have a decent crest! What is that? A chicken?”
“COCKEREL!” Tottenham corrected.
“Whatever. It’s lame anyway!”
“Speak for yourself!”
“The canon is a powerful weapon. I can destroy your stupid cockerel anytime!”
Tottenham scoffed, “Please! Your form this season is shit!”
“Form is temporary. Class is permanent. And you don’t have class. CLEARLY, you don’t.”
“And you think YOU have class?”
“Of course I do,” Arsenal stated proudly.
Tottenham scoffed once again and said, “You don’t.”
This irritated Arsenal more than it should have; he frowned and crossed his arms, “just wait until the next derby.” He said bitterly.
“Challenge accepted.”
Liverpool rolled his eyes, the season hasn’t even started and the bickering was this bad. He couldn’t imagine what it will be like when it starts.
The rest of the afternoon was rather peaceful as most of the clubs were inside their houses, except for Chelsea. He was taking his lion for an evening walk. The other clubs, especially Arsenal, thought it was ridiculous, as it would frighten some clubs. Namely Swansea.
Southampton came out of her house to stretch her legs and get some fresh air. She had heard everything that went on outside, however, she didn’t bother to check it out. She’d rather not get involved.
Arsenal came outside and sat on his porch, he had a deadpan look on his face. He called out to Southampton, “hey, Soton!”
The Saint turned around and waved at the London club, she greeted back, “Hello, Arsenal! What’s with the look? Are you ok?”
“Tired. Tottenham made me tired.”
“Bickering again?”
“Banter is the right word, really… You’re fortunate Portsmouth is somewhere else.”
“Fortunate? Maybe. He still likes to start arguments whenever I come to visit him.”
“Siblings…” Arsenal muttered, “and then there’s the Manchester brothers and Stoke City…”
“I heard everything from inside, I woke up earlier than usual because of Mancy.”
“That’s what he does…” Arsenal shrugged, “at least it’s quiet now. Hopefully, tomorrow will be less chaotic.”
Southampton nodded; she sat next to Arsenal, just to see who’d pass in front of them. Chelsea and his lion passed in front of them, oblivious to the pair.
“How quirky can he get?” Arsenal commented with his eyes narrowed at the lion.
“That’s about as quirky as he gets, apparently,” Southampton said.
Little did Southampton and Arsenal know, Manchester United was hiding inside a bush, taking pictures of the two, “Blackmail material…” He whispered to himself.
The rest of the evening went smoothly without any more commotions. All will start again tomorrow… probably… possibly.