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The first time, Ignis was 16 and had just received his driver’s license the week prior. He didn’t actually have his license on him at the time, though if he were to be pulled over – driving without a license would be the least of his worries. Technically, it’s Grand Theft Auto until he returns the Vehicle. And as a retainer, a servant, to the crown and not a member of the nobility himself (even if he had been raised among them and taught to behave as one in near all occasions), he doubt he would be able to argue for the lesser and more accurate sentence of Joyriding if facing the lawyer of the noble lady whose car he was cruising in.
It was a nice car and belonged to a not-so nice woman. Her Lady Lydia of Leide, not only was her title disgustingly alliterate but she was unbelievably rude. So bold to be rude to the Prince himself, telling the boy off after she bumped into him. The nerve of the woman. Than as the cherry on top, she decided to give her opinion about Ignis’ hair, which he had styled upwards that day. Noctis thought it looked “cool” that way. Even if Her Lady Lydia of Leide thought it “unprofessional”.
The thrill was indescribable. His heart raced like it hadn’t since his first sparring session with Gladiolus. A grin plastered to his face and try as he might he could not will his muscles to a more neutral expression, mania looking back at him in the rearview mirror that he kept checking, excepeting the crown police or even the crownsguard behind him. It was a delight. He could never do it again.
He did it constantly and none was the wiser. There was a security camera in the citadel garage of course, but for the most part it went unmonitored, of course if one were to check it, Ignis would be damned. He could only hope that no fights (or worse things) occurred in the garage on the nights that he snuck out with the valet’s key ring on his belt. He stopped assuring himself it would be the “last time” around the 12th time, at which point it had been 8 months since his first time. He never allowed himself more than two rides in a month.
Until now. His pulse raced as he made his way towards the Audi of a rather homophobic lord that had made some insenuations (which were true) about Ignis himself. The chamberlain was very firmly in the closet, but too often he was clocked as queer. He could only deny the accusations out of fear of his position being revoked. While the crown city was fairly liberal in gay rights, it could not said of all of the kingdom’s regions and while the King has never stated anything homophobic and has signed off on all gay right protections – he would be subject to the views of all the noble houses and councils of Lucis by allowing a homosexual to have charge of his Prince. It would bring up rumors about Noctis himself and that had to be avoided at all costs.
So he revered the car at a red light and let the thrill of it fill him with glee. It was a petty revenge, using up his gas. Something the noble man could easily afford to get more of, but it was something and Ignis would take any revenge that he could. There was also just the knowledge that he had violated the man’s property, cruised around the seedier parts of Insomnia with it. He would lie if ever asked (and gods he hoped no one would ever ask) but a part of it was arousing. Ignis wasn’t sure what aspect of it, maybe the adrenaline or the act of doing something forbidden with the sensation of driving – and by the six he loved driving, but it was undeniably a turn on. Which made it all the more fun and their was some added revenge in knowing this particular car was being driven by some perverted faggot in the words of it’s owner. If he jerked off in the back seat, that was between him, the astrals, and his handkerchief.
Then, he was caught.
“Enjoy yourself?” Gladio asked, leaning against the wall of the garage – smoking of all things. Good.
“Enjoying your cancer stick?” Ignis asked in return, “won’t that interfere with your health – thus your ability to protect Noctis?”
Gladiolus rolled his eyes and made an unseemly gesture with his free hand while the other brought the cigarette back to his lips, smoke blew out and Ignis cursed his teen hormones for making the sight so arousing. Luck was on his side that his recovery period wasn’t that short and there was no worry of a “situation” popping up, so to speak.
“Don’t get your panties in a twist Iggy, I’m not gonna snitch. No need for thinly veiled threats. Also, in case you’re actually concerned I only let myself do it twice a month. I know it’s a bad habit, but I need it after my bi-monthly meetings with the Head of Crownsguard,”.
Clarus was demoted from “father” to “Head of Crownsguard” one two days of every month, when Gladiolus was required to report everything he did with Noctis, All his training, any work injuries, and any harm that had come to prince – anything from a papercut to a stab wound was to be acknowledged and the fault of them put upon the shield. A smoke break seemed fair.
“Well, secrets have a way of getting people closer and I suppose since we’re both so involved with Noctis’ life, it would be best for us to get closer,” Ignis said, holding out a hand.
Gladiolus shook it firmly and nodded, “Just not too close, Scientia. I don’t swing that way,”.
“Neither do I,” Ignis gritted out, he wanted to drive a car into a wall. Or maybe Gladiolus himself.
“Hey, like I said, I don’t snitch about what you do in your personal time. Or I guess you’re technically always on the clock. But I don’t care what you do as long as it doesn’t hurt Noct,”.
“I would rather die than harm Noctis or see harm come to him,” Ignis assured him.
“Good,”.
A moment of silence followed.
“You never answered my question. Did you enjoy yourself? Is it fun? Have you ever taken Dad’s car out for a spin? Or the Regalia?” Gladio whispered the Regalia’s name, his eyes wide.
“I only use the cars of visiting nobles. Never anyone from home and I would certainly never be so bold to lay a finger on His Majesty’s car,” Ignis hissed, then in a softer voice, “and yes, it’s very very fun,”.
“You should let me come along sometime?” Gladio tossed the but of his cigarette onto the floor and Ignis is so stunned by the request that he doesn’t reprimand the shield for littering.
“Perhaps, I’ll think about it,”.
“Text me,” Gladio said as he turned to leave, “we’ll have some fun,”.
What a thrill that would be.