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Atsushi was the one to kiss him first. The one to start the shitshow they had managed to get themselves into. Took the spark of emotion that existed between them and put it against tinder.
And then took a fucking flamethrower to it.
Sometimes, Akutagawa hated him for it. Whenever he remembered that he was supposed to hate Atsushi, as they were mortal enemies. Or whatever they put on airs of being. Whatever show they put on for the world that was so blatantly false, that Akutagawa felt like a court jester whenever he called Atsushi “jinko” to his superiors.
They always scoffed, just how you’re supposed to treat the court jester, so Akutagawa supposes that he was playing his part well.
He runs his fingers through Atsushi’s hair, and his lover’s nose wrinkles, before flattening out when Atsushi remembers that he’s supposed to be pretending he’s asleep. Akutagawa lets him keep on pretending, even know he knew the moment that Atsushi’s head “accidentally” fell onto his lap that there was no chance he was asleep.
They’re already going to much pretending, what’s a bit more?
His fingers play with Atsushi’s bangs, before he lifts them up and out of the way. His forehead is free of scars and wrinkles, despite how much abuse Atsushi endured at the orphanage (mostly because of the tiger) and how angry Atsushi pretended to be on the battlefield (mostly because of Akutagawa).
Atsushi sighs and presses his forehead to Akutagawa’s hand.
“You’re really bad at pretending to be asleep.”
“Snore.”
“Really? You’re going to say snore?”
“Snore snore.”
Akutagawa rolls his eyes, using his free hand to pull the blanket tighter over Atsushi. Their movie night ended early in favor of Atsushi feigning sleep to put his head on his lover’s lap. Akutagawa didn’t mind. It let him stare at Atsushi as long as he wanted, eyes scanning the uncovered parts of his body.
One bare shoulder, where an oversized dog-themed (because they had to practice the act of hating each other somewhere) shirt slipped off. His neck, pale and pretty. Good real estate for Akutagawa to sink his teeth into, especially because marks disappeared within minutes.
Couldn’t go into a play while sporting hickeys from your sworn enemy, could you?
His face, outlined with the pale light from the television that highlighted delicate features like his silver eyelashes, his poorly hidden smile. Akutagawa nudged the smile back into neutrality, but the moment he finished, it was back and stronger.
Akutagawa sighs and continues to pretend that Atsushi is asleep.
His fingers tap a soothing rhythm into Atsushi’s head, like a lullaby, if a lullaby was tapped into your forehead instead of sung.
“Is that Twinkle Twinkle Little Star? ”
“Aren’t you supposed to be asleep?” Akutagawa shoots back, flicking Atsushi in the forehead and pinching his mouth shut, “Sleep.”
Atsushi lets out another snore.
“Idiot jinko.” Akutagawa mutters under his breath, shifting so Atsushi can lie on his legs better, “...My idiot jinko.”
“Does that make you my lawnmower?”
“Yes, go the fuck to sleep.”
Atsushi’s sweet smile is now a smirk. Akutagawa pinches it away.
His. But only for moments like this. Only when they pretended they didn’t love each other. Only when they could calm ignorance for their own words.
Akutagawa leans forward, lips brushing the forehead of his sleeping lover. He pulls back before he can follow through, heart lodged in his throat. There was no point to trying to cage it anymore. Atsushi broke the locks long ago.
When he looks at his lover’s face, Atsushi is looking back at him with unconcealed disappointment in his eyes.
“What? Do you want your mortal enemy to kiss you?”
Atsushi’s hand holds his cheek, guiding Akutagawa’s head back down.
The look in his eyes is answer enough.
Atsushi turns his head, feigning sleep once more with an exaggerated snore.
Akutagawa laughs, but he does follow through this time, lips pressing against Atsushi’s forehead in a proper kiss.