Chapter Text
So you sat there, in that hole, regretting everything?
Does it burn?
Does the guilt eat you up inside, like a rat feasting upon intestines?
Do you cry, do you weep into the bottle as you finish it?
Do you visit them, do you amble into the endless expanse of trees and do you visit them?
Do you stand over their shallow graves and do you think of me?
Do I haunt you, do they haunt you?
Do they stalk your dreams?
How much have you abandoned Felix, how many blanks must I fill in?
Will you let me?
Will you allow me to exercise my power over you in a quest to find the truth?
Do you love me, Felix, as more than a friend?
Did you love my family as your own, did you love Rosemary and Sophie and Molly and Edd?
Did you love Linda, in any capacity, or was it all a lie?
Did you love to lie?
Did you ever love yourself or was it hopeless devotion, devotion to me, to the drinks, to those meaningless moments you so cared for?
Are you a bad man, Felix, one of the shadows, of shame, a coward?
Were you a good man, the man I saw at church or the man in the kitchen late at night, the man who held my children, the children you killed, the man who had longing in his eyes and kindness in his heart?
We both know the answer to that one.