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Fuyuhiko didn’t like the beach.
Is not that he hated it, not particularly. He just loathed the idea of exposing his bare skin to others. It constantly put him in that headspace where he became ashamed of himself, ashamed of his existence. Still, over the years he had to admit it has gotten better.
He had friends he could count on.
Who would have thought, the heir to the Kuzuryu clan had friends. Not just classmates, they were his actual friends. And even stranger still: it didn’t stop at his classmates, but students from different classes were also his friends.
He still remembers how difficult it was in his first year. To get closer to others, it would mean becoming vulnerable, it would be easier to get hurt, and hurt others in return. He didn’t need that, he thought.
There was enough hurt in his family as it is.
Yet, somehow. Somehow he found it in himself to not feel weak because of it. Quite the opposite; his bonds made him stronger and more apt to lead his clan in the future. He was so glad he had Peko at his side to remind him of that… he was even happier to have found a friend in her, too. Something he always wanted.
Peko… she also became close with others. And Fuyuhiko didn’t have to order her to do it. She did it because she wanted to feel connected. It’s strange but it made him… proud of her.
There the heir stood, gazing upon the vast ocean while lingering thoughts raced through his mind. He sat upon the sand and thought he could look at the sea for hours.
Absent-mindedly he began drawing with his fingers on the surface. He wasn’t an expert at calligraphy, not by a long shot, but as he stared at the ever so imposing ocean in front of him he began to draw the character representing it.
His fingers trailed up and down expertly in the grainy surface. “Umi”, written in sand, right beside him. Fuyuhiko had difficulty writing this one as a kid, and then he found it even more difficult to make his handwriting look at least presentable, but he grew fond of writing that particular kanji… after writing her name in his notebook so many times.
"Hey hey."
Speaking of…
Nanami sat beside him holding a couple of coconuts in her hands, offering Fuyuhiko said fruit and a gentle smile.
Fuyuhiko's mind, which hadn't caught up with reality yet, suddenly jolted right back as he spotted her.
Using his palm he quickly erased all evidence pointing towards him writing in the sand as he heard his panicked heartbeat loudly echoing in his ears.
What are you so scared of? It's just a girl.
A girl you've liked for three goddamn years.
A girl whose smile is capable of lingering ever still in my mind, clouding my every thought.
A girl who almost, almost makes me believe I could leave my troubled past behind.
A girl who makes me want to be a better person.
"Were you about to say something, Kuzuryu?" she asked.
His heart stung at his chest and sank.
How was she so damn perceptive?
It took every bit of courage he had to join her and the other girls for a swim. Well, he kinda didn’t have a choice when she was the one who asked after all; he had been spotted walking by the seaside, and Ibuki, alongside Peko, waved to get his attention. Turns out Peko did want to talk to him about something important– namely if he had seen her bamboo sword somewhere, worried if someone had taken it. He hadn’t, but he offered to help her find it, and so, on their search the girls had joined in also doing their best to help.
In the end, one of the Monokubs, Monosuke had taken it for ‘safekeeping’, whatever the hell that means. He probably snatched it away while she went for a swim because he thought it looked cool or something, he could never tell with the Monokubs. They finished the search by lunchtime, and Fuyuhiko became absorbed in the friendly atmosphere. The girls ran back to the beach and before the heir had a chance to wave them goodbye, Chiaki asked if he’d like to join them.
“ S-sure. Not like I’m doin’ anythin’, anyways… ”
Chiaki Nanami… how could I ever refuse you …?
And as luck would have it, now they were alone. Sitting side by side watching the sunset by the ocean. Nanami by now would probably have been absorbed in some game, and he couldn’t help but find it odd that she wasn’t; instead, she was staring at him, eagerly, giving the boy her undivided attention, and never in his life had he felt more unworthy.
He slurped some coconut juice that felt heavy in his throat before finally answering “Oh I was just… thinkin’, is all. We’re inside a virtual world but this all feels so real, y’know?”
Chiaki nodded “Mhm. I haven’t stopped to watch the sunset in so long… I think…”
“Heh, you’re probably too busy gaming.” he chuckled.
“Yeah, that’s definitely it.” she giggled and Fuyuhiko could physically feel his heart melt.
“That’s good, though. Y’gotta hone your talent… I envy you, Nanami.” he had let that last part slip. His heart began skipping much quicker now- that was careless.
“What do you mean, F–Kuzuryu?”
Did she almost call him by his first name? No, he must have misheard.
Well, now he had no choice but to spill his guts to the girl he had a crush on because it’s not like he could bullshit his way out of answering that question. At that moment Fuyuhiko thought himself pathetic, he couldn’t help it, it was almost instinct to think of himself as such at this point. Yet, something about Chiaki… made him want to open up willingly.
But the question lingering in his mind was: would she accept him even if she knew what lurks beneath? Uneasy, insecurity, uncertainty… would she still greet him every morning with a smile when seeing him? Would she still talk to him about her favorite games as sparkles shine brilliantly in her cotton candy eyes? Would she, at least, still can him a friend?
He took a deep breath “I just– I never asked for my Ultimate title, see. Sometimes I wish I was somethin’ more than an heir to a criminal organization. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful or some shit, but it feels like is all I’ve ever known– all I’m supposed to be is to be ruthless because I’m expected to.”
“... It’s like you didn’t have a choice, right?”
“Exactly. It’s so fuckin’ hard to connect to people, my old man even said I’d look weak if I let my guard down because of the way I look. And that people wouldn’t take me seriously.” he swallowed. Now that he mentioned his father there was no going back.
“Mmm” Chiaki gestured towards the back of her neck like she did when pulling the hood of her favorite navy jacket, the one with cat ears. She pinched her skin upwards unconsciously, but there was nothing to pull. It took her a while to find the right words, “If I couldn’t choose my talent, I’d be very confused about things too. It’d be weird if you weren’t.”
She sipped a bit of coconut juice and continued, “I mean… I can understand now why it was so hard for you to become friends with everyone at first… I think.”
Fuyuhiko’s face felt hot and he hoped it was because of the sun, but he knew it wasn’t. “Y-yeah. That’s exactly it.”
Chiaki smiled at him, the sun beaming directly in her direction, her hair now a beautiful shade of apricot instead of the usual pink. She held her palms close to her heart and looked at the yakuza directly in the eyes, a pair of rose quartz obfuscating his view of everything else around him.
“I’m happy that I can be your friend. Thank you for trusting me, Kuzuryu.”
She had said that so sincerely, Fuyuhiko had to take a moment to catch his breath and to reassure himself that he wasn’t in fact, dreaming.
He couldn’t contain his happiness. He also felt incredibly embarrassed but right now that didn’t matter so much. He didn’t dare look away from her, either. It could have been his imagination but he swore he saw a hint of flush in her cheeks as well, and even so, that didn’t stop her from smiling in his direction.
“Hey, Nanami… about that festival comin’ up. Do you want… to come with me and… maybe… watch the fireworks together?” The words began to fly out of his mouth in that moment of sudden euphoria, despite him fumbling a bit with the invite. Fuyuhiko couldn’t explain it, but at that moment he felt like he could do anything.
He spoke completely without thinking this through– what if she said no? What if she didn’t like him that way? Would he be able to take the blow?
He honestly wasn’t sure, but goddammit he had to try.
Three fuckin’ years, huh ?
She was taken aback by the spur-of-the-moment invite as well, Chiaki broke eye contact and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, but she didn’t stop smiling.
“I-I’d love to. I’m really glad you asked me, too… I wanted to but… I’m not as brave as you are.” she replied with a shy smile and cheeks flushed, hands doing their best to hide it, but to no avail, she was as pink as her hair. Just when Fuyuhiko thought she couldn’t get any more beautiful… he had never seen an embarrassed Chiaki before, a side of her that maybe few have seen before.
He needed a moment, he couldn’t believe that she said yes, or that she wanted to have asked him to the festival as well. Has he been dreaming this whole time? Was this virtual reality playing tricks on him? Were everything and everyone holograms alongside the scenery? Was she the real Chiaki Nanami?
Fuyuhiko felt dizzy, his heart was beating so fast, the girl finally locked eyes with him again, seemingly gathering up some courage of her own, looking at him with the most adoring expression anyone has ever looked at him before, and God, please don’t let any of this be just a dream.
And yet… Chiaki’s hand on his’ felt undeniably real. And even in the wildest of fantasies, he could never think they could be this soft.