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“So.” Isu slides up to the rest of his team, where they gather around their stolen plate of cookies from the long table. That’s pretty much the only nice food at this office party. “There’s no way Hansung is sober, right?”
In the distance, there’s the sound of their boss cackling madly.
“Who knows,” Khun says vaguely. Eyes immediately turn to him. “What?”
“What did you do,” Endorsi says dryly.
“Nothing.”
“That’s the most blatant lie I’ve ever heard,” Hatz states. “He’s drinking eggnog. Why the hell would he ever drink anything besides coffee?”
Khun just smirks.
“It’s okay, I believe you,” Bam says cheerfully, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Of course he does,” Anak mutters.
“Thanks, Bam.” Khun snatches a cookie from the plate. “Ugh, these are so dry. Can someone get some coffee?”
“Get it yourself,” Endorsi snorts. “No one else has a problem with the cookies. Why don’t you go try the casserole or something?”
Even Bam winces. “The casserole is…really really soggy,” he says. “And everything in it is overcooked. I never thought it was possible to overcook a casserole.”
“You tried it? You poor thing.” Isu casts a glance at the dish. It’s hard to tell what it even is besides an off-putting gray sludge.
“I tried everything,” Bam shrugs. “I was hungry.”
They look at him with varying expressions of horror. “How are you alive ,” Anak stresses.
“I’ve eaten worse.”
“Like what? Khun’s cooking?”
“Hey!”
“I’m not sure if Khun’s cooking can even be called food,” Isu remarks. They had all been there to witness the spectacle of Bam’s kitchen being set on fire. Khun was attempting to make salmon, vegetables, and mashed potatoes. What they got was what looked like charcoal with a side of ash and cinders. They all ate takeout that day.
Khun promptly pulls out a knife. “Say one more word and you’re dead.”
“Whoa!” Isu jumps back. “Where did you even get that from?”
“It was for cutting the cake,” Bam says. He takes the knife from Khun. “Khun, stop attacking your friends.”
“They’re not my friends.”
“That’s harsh,” Hatz deadpans.
“Like you would know, Hara-kiri.”
“Like you would have friends, Ugly Earrings.”
“Guys!” Isu pulls them both back. “We’re at a Christmas party! We should have fun!”
“This is the saddest Christmas party I’ve ever been to,” Anak states bluntly. “I think Lauroe has the right idea here.”
Their coworker is rolled up in a blanket, sleeping soundly. There’s other people at the party, too, but they were more interested in their phones or in the decorations outside. Most left once they tasted the food. Since the party was hosted on their team’s floor, though, they were forced to stay. Their team had stolen the one edible plate of cookies, then ran off and gathered behind the giant Christmas tree to eat in peace. They’ve been hiding there ever since Hansung yelled something about gathering everyone to play a game.
“My mouth is so dry,” Khun mutters. “Maybe I will get a cup of coffee. I can’t believe I’m sinking to that degenerate’s level…”
“Um…” Bam interjects. “I wouldn’t do that.”
All eyes turn to him.
“I…may have…added salt to the coffee?”
“ You? ” Endorsi stares at him incredulously.
“It was supposed to be a prank,” Bam wrings his hands nervously. “Because Hansung was the only one drinking it.” He makes a face at the thought of instant coffee. “But then I heard Yuri might’ve spiked the eggnog…?”
“Yuri from upper management? When did she even—okay, whatever,” Khun grumbles. “I’ll just die of dehydration, I guess.”
“Isn’t there a water dispenser?” Isu points out.
“It’s empty. I guess everyone avoided the drinks,” Bam smiles sheepishly, before pulling out his own water bottle. “If you don’t mind, you can drink from mine, Khun.”
Khun slowly takes the bottle. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that?” But at Bam’s shrug, he sighs and takes a small sip. “Thanks.”
“Ew,” Anak whispers to Endorsi, who scoffs.
“Anyway,” Endorsi says as Khun returns Bam’s water bottle. “What are we going to do? Just hide for the entire day? Hansung made this stupid party mandatory, so we can’t even leave early unless we want to be suddenly swamped with work when we come back.”
“I see no problem with hiding.” Isu sits down under the Christmas tree, leaning back.
The tree rocks, once, twice, and comes crashing down. Ornaments and tinsel go flying. The poor presents at the bottom—fake ones, at least, just cardboard boxes wrapped in paper—are crushed under the weight. All attention turns their way.
“There you are!” Hansung grins from the other side of the room. “I was wondering where you went.”
“Great job, Isu,” Khun mutters. He slides a knife out of his sleeve. Bam carefully tucks the blade back in.
“Would you like candy canes?” Hansung offers, and nope, this can not be their boss.
“Is this poison?” Hatz eyes the candy warily.
Isu takes one, breaking off a small piece and nibbling on it. “It seems safe.”
“It could be slow-acting poison,” Khun suggests. “I’m good, thank you.”
Hansung doesn’t seem too bothered by the rejection. He sets down his cup of eggnog at the table. Everyone peers at it suspiciously. “I have a game for you all.”
“A game?” Khun repeats skeptically.
“A scavenger hunt!” Hansung shouts cheerfully.
“No.”
“Nope.”
“No way.”
“The winners get to take an extended vacation for a month into January.”
Khun raises an eyebrow. “Are you even allowed to do that?”
“I’m your boss; I can do whatever I want.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works. You really are drunk. Do I need to call Evankhell?”
“I told Evankhell she could burn the place down if she came,” Hansung says far too happily. Isu slowly sets down his phone. “Anyway, here’s the list of things you need to find.” He sets down a few papers. “You can work with a partner. First one to bring all the items to me wins.”
Khun grabs Bam’s hand. “Come on. I’m looking forward to not seeing that bastard’s face for the next month. What’s the first thing on this list?”
“Instant coffee,” Bam reads out loud.
“Okay, we’ll get back to that. What’s the second thing?”
“A coffee machine.”
“Skip that too. What’s after that?”
“Uhh…a pink Post-It?”
Khun makes a thoughtful sound. “Endorsi might have some of those.”
“I’m not sure if she would like us going through her desk, though…”
Khun pauses in his steps. “Come on,” he encourages. “Don’t you want a month-long vacation, though? Just imagine. We can go traveling, or just stay at home and relax…”
“I guess,” Bam says. “I don’t really mind working, but if it makes you happy, we might as well have fun with this.” He smiles.
Three minutes later, as an angry Endorsi chases them around the office, Bam decides he probably needs to rework his definition of “fun”.
“Are you literally going to just steal the office coffee machine?” Hatz watches Isu tug the machine into his arms.
“Why not? It’s not like we’ll be able to find another one anytime soon,” Isu shrugs. “Well, Khun has a small one at his desk, but do you really want to deal with him?”
Hatz’s silence says enough.
“Now, is there anything else on the list that we can grab while we’re in here—why does Hansung want an entire refrigerator ?”
“Glasses,” Endorsi reads aloud. Huh, come to think of it, does anyone in our team wear glasses?
She vaguely recalls Khun having a pair of reading glasses. But that was only once, and she highly doubts he keeps them in his desk.
But this month-long vacation is really tempting…besides, what’s the blue bastard going to do?
“Want to raid Khun’s desk?” she asks Anak, already knowing the answer.
They grin and head towards the desk in the corner.
“Good job everyone!” Hansung cheers as they come back. Khun doesn’t even see him at first, since their boss is so short, hidden under four refrigerators. Why did he even want refrigerators in the first place? Where did the other teams get theirs?
Hansung rips open a packet of new instant coffee that one of them had brought, sipping it with a satisfied hum. They all watch him with varying expressions of anticipation. Khun has no idea who came first, when all of them lugged various heavy objects into their office at the same time.
“And the winner is…” Hansung takes another sip of his coffee, ignoring the glares directed at him. “Laure!”
“LAURE?!” Six flabbergasted voices ring out at the same time. All eyes snap towards their sleeping coworker, who opens one eye, yawns, and rolls back up in his blanket.
“We didn’t even see him moving around…” Isu muttered.
Khun takes out a knife. Bam pushes his hand down.
“Anyway, you guys can put everything back now,” Hansung waves dismissively. “Merry Christmas, happy holidays, whatever.” He takes all the instant coffee with him.
Khun pulls out his phone. “I’m calling Evankhell.”