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It was the first time in his life Egon was truly alone. There was no one in his house except him. He sat in his chair. One of the last things that reminded him he had a life with Ray. He was happy there. The chair reminded him he was pleased just sitting in the same room with Ray. Both were not paying attention to each other but the presence was good enough.
He got up out of his chair. He wanted to smash it but he needed someplace comfortable to sit. Comfortable sitting and reading or calling Ray. At least try to call ray either he chicken out or Ray was asleep. He left messages. Messages of angry. Messages of sadness. Messages of his love and messages of his loneliness. Ray would call him back he just watched the phone ring. He should have picked up at least once but his heart could not handle it.
This reality he lived in was the worst. He promised he’d be here for only a moment but a moment has turned into forever. That was just his luck.
He saw himself in his mirrors. The face of a man who left his partner. For what, to save the world. Sure he would save it but it wasn’t for him. His was gone he would do it for his daughter. He would do it for Winston and his family. He would do it for Louis Tully. He would do it for Dana, Peter and Oscar. Most of all he would do it for Ray. He would not do it for himself.
The mirror reflected a monster back at him. Without a thought, he put his fist through the image. Blood ran down his hand. It should have hurt but he was numb to the pain.
He punches every single mirror in his house. His hand at the end needed stitches. Usually, Ray would have stitched him up in situations like this.
Ray would have given him whiskey to numb the pain. He went in without any. He pulled the stitches through. It wasn’t the best job but it would do.
He saw his desk. Full of half-written letters to Ray. Letters of his love. Letters he should finish and send. He walked outside. Lighter in hand. He watched as his words burnt away. Maybe the wind would carry them to his lover.
He knew better than going to his lab in this state. It was one of the last places full of memories of Ray. Like his drill. The one drill that he almost used to do what he wanted to do now in college.
He ended up falling on the ground right before the ashes. Sleeping there. In the morning he would forget the emotions of the day. In the morning he would go back to work on saving the world. For now, he dreamt of a better life.