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he still gives his love

Summary:

an odyssey of a love story

Notes:

some notes:

- formatting is as such: odd number chapters are the “present day,” and even number chapters are flashbacks to various points in the jedleo (or jedleoabbey) backstory. if you want a more straightforward read, just skip the even chapters
- takes place circa the end of s3. jed has come forward about his ms, and they’ve had the hearings, but mrs. landingham is still alive (bc i wanted her to be)
- yes every chapter is named after a book of tanach (the jewish bible- contains more than the pentateuch) that’s because i’m pretentious
- this is the longest fic i’ve ever written, and i’m quite proud of it. doesn't entirely hold canon with my other fics, just ignore that

title is from pearl jam's "given to fly" - and he still gives his love, he just gives it away / the love he receives is the love that is saved

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: leviticus (or: one)

Chapter Text

Monday, January 15, 2001
Present Day

 

The January morning is bone-chillingly cold and blindingly bright. Josh had nearly slipped on a patch of black ice on his way into the building, which Leo had tried not to laugh at when Josh had brought it up as the reason for his dishevelment. The mood inside the Oval Office, however, is as warm as ever.

The Senior Staff have just finished going through their assorted briefings and concerns, and Leo is feeling like the day ahead of them might just be manageable, after all. Days like this are rare. Lately, the schedule has been fifty flavors of hell, all one after the other like repeated kicks to the teeth. Slow days are a blessing. A not-so-small part of Leo sighs in relief as the group finishes up their reports.

“Is that all?” Jed asks, leaning against his desk as he processes the entirety of what he’s just heard from his most trusted advisors.

Most people would not be able to absorb so much information so early in the morning, but Jed Bartlet is not most people. He has a mind like a sponge and a sieve; taking in everything, then filtering out the dreck. He’s also in a rather cheerful mood. That’s also a blessing. The past few weeks have seen Jed at his stormiest, and it’s nice to see him joking around, the way he used to.

The issues of the day are issues, of course, but nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing that will call the United Nations into an emergency session. Nothing with a death toll high enough to designate a national day of mourning. No scandal that will dominate the tabloids for weeks. No enormous blemish on the Bartlet Administration pages in future history textbooks.

C.J.’s report of a hurricane about to strike Louisiana had been grim, but FEMA is already on the ground, and for all his many talents, Jed can’t turn around a storm. Josh had mentioned something about setting up meetings to get a piece of healthcare legislation passed, but Jed knows the bill has bipartisan support, so that won’t be particularly difficult. Toby and Sam are pushing him to give more thought to his upcoming climate change speech in Helsinki, but Jed isn’t particularly concerned. The same can’t be said for Leo, who had listened to Sam talk about speech deadlines and rehearsals with increasingly worried eyes. No one misses the fond looks Josh casts in Sam’s direction as the Deputy Communication Director makes his points.

Josh and Sam have been somewhere between heaven on earth ever since they had begun dating, an unusual look on both of them. The two of them seem to walk a few inches off the ground at all times, moving with energy and purpose even during late nights and early hours of the morning. They only have eyes for each other, so much so that the President has to loudly clear his throat to tear Josh’s eyes off his boyfriend. C.J. has been teasing them incessantly, as has Leo, though it’s all with great affection. Toby seems annoyed, grumbling about how it’s bad for Sam to be distracted during such a crucial time, but the entire team knows he’s happy for the both of them. Curmudgeonly grousing is just Toby’s way of showing love.

“Yes, sir, that’s everything,” C.J. says, closing her briefing folder in one crisp motion.

Jed nods. He stops fixing his cufflinks for a moment to lift his eyes to survey them. They’re a team. His team. The most kind-hearted, hard-working, brilliant team in the history of politics, he thinks. Maybe even in the history of teams. He feels a swell of paternal pride rise within him. They’ve come so far, soldiered through so much. Leo had once said that they’d walk backwards through hell for him, and Jed knows in his bones that that’s true.

“Thank you, everyone, you’re free to go,” Jed says.

“Thank you, Mr. President,” Toby, Josh, Sam, and C.J. chorus, before walking out of the office in respectful silence.

Leo doesn’t need to be told not to follow them out or retreat into his office. He always stays with Jed immediately after the morning briefing, as a sounding board for the President’s thoughts as well as some company before the day begins in earnest. Often, he delivers his own briefing, either more classified or personal than the others are able to hear. Jed waits until the door is firmly shut before speaking.

“Slow day,” he comments.

“I’m not complaining,” Leo replies. “Do you want a fast day?”

Jed chuckles. The only “fast” day that could also be considered a good one is the day they’d gotten Roberto Mendoza on the bench, and that had been a lone victory in a sea of failures. The administration has been working at a much more productive clip since then, which is a double-edged sword. On the one hand, they’re getting a lot done. On the other, none of their days can be considered “slow.”

“No,” Jed says, “I really don’t.”

“Me neither.”

“It’s bad, about Louisiana.”

“Yeah,” Leo says, suddenly somber. “Yeah, it is.”

They stand in silence for a moment, thinking about the devastation about to hit the Southeastern coast of the country. Leo wonders if it would be premature to set up a trip to Baton Rouge after the storm hits, or at least, some kind of public address.

“The trip to Helsinki on the horizon is looking good,” Jed says, changing the topic.

“Yeah, it is. Are you excited?”

Jed turns to adjust one of the picture frames on the desk, and Leo smiles to himself. Jed’s tells have never been the most subtle. It’s why he’s such a godawful poker player, as well as the reason he’s such a genuine politician. He can’t lie if he knows people will pick up on it. And yet-

“Yes,” Jed says, with a facial expression that conveys the exact opposite.

Leo shakes his head in disbelief.

“If a reporter asks you that, can you try to lie a little more convincingly?”

“It’s an extremely important conference of world leaders, to address a very serious issue facing the community of nations as we head into the twenty-first century!”

“Yeah, but you’re not excited for it.”

Jed deflates like a popped balloon.

“I’m neither excited nor unexcited,” Jed says. “It’s a climate conference. It’s important for me to attend.”

“You don’t need to tell me that, sir.”

They exchange glances, then lull into a comfortable silence. Leo shuffles the folder in his hand and starts thinking about the phone calls he has to take today. Jed does the same, though his list contains more titles and fewer names. He’s never been good at remembering names. He has Leo to do that for him.

Jed thinks back to the Senior Staffers, who just minutes ago, had filled this room. Two of them stick out in particular, with wide eyes and beaming grins completely out of touch with the news they had delivered. Jed wonders what Leo had thought of them.

“So,” Jed says, shoving his hands into his pockets. “Josh and Sam.”

It’s not a question, nor does it hold any judgment. It’s the verbal equivalent of picking up an interesting pebble and turning it over in one’s palm.

“Yeah.”

“That’s something, huh?”

“As a wise man once said, sir, everything that’s not nothing is something.”

Jed pushes himself off the desk and begins a leisurely walk around the office, Leo’s eyes following his every step.

“A wise man?” Jed asks, humor dancing behind his blue eyes.

Leo offers him a tiny almost-smile.

“Yes, sir. One of the wisest I’ve ever met.”