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The floor creaked, uncomfortably loud in this supposedly calm night. Curtains closed, door locked and ready to depart to the bed, sink into the comfort of the warm sheets on the second floor.
"If you wish to stay the night, you are free to do so. As you should know, my residence is upstairs." Zhongli kissed the top of his lovers head, who had currently been occupying his office in the funeral parlor. He set the cup of tea he had made for him on the table, next to all the proof of frustration: crinkled papers and splattered ink. "It‘s very late dearest, please just…" he sank down, to get level with Childe, currently leaning back on his chair. He rested his head on the maroon shirt over his shoulders, which carried the scent of sweet jasmine and a hint of glaze lillies - for once, not blood. Yet the warmth would‘ve been comforting all the same.
"Just finish up what you absolutely need to. As I mentioned…you‘re free to join me for tonights rest."
Just as he had wanted to stand up, Childe turned to him and gave him a little kiss on his cheek. What a simple gesture, it filled Zhonglis heart with childish joy. That‘s what Childe was especially capable of. Charming Zhongli and wrapping him around his finger. "Thanks Xiansheng," he chuckled, "I can‘t promise anything, but I‘ll try not to disappoint you. Now you’re off to bed, you said it yourself its getting late, heh"
"Very well then" Zhongli was about to take his leave, he smiled just before stepping out of the doorframe and with a sigh he had wished his dearest a good night.
What the former Archon has deduced so far, is that this affair with countless letters and sighs of frustration have been going on for a few nights now.
What had been beyond his knowing, was Childe’s goal and whatever he needed to do this troublesome paperwork for. Now for consecutive nights.
What he maybe should not know, was that the young man was trying to postpone his return to the cold and harsh lands of Snezhnaya.
A month, a week, a day more. Celestia, even an hour would sate this harbinger more than an abrupt call into the Tsaritsas palace, that was so observantly looming over his head in the clouds. Just a little more time…a little more.
They couldn‘t have enough of that little time more. Not yet at least.
A little more time for this harbinger to stay with his mask taken off. Though not on the streets of the busy Harbour, at least in the arms of the one person who had finally taught him that there is so much more to every person and even a little bit of love in himself. Though maybe it shouldn‘t even have come this far.
The sun had not been shining brightly on this morning of the weekend, but the sun ray intolerably and rudely tickling Zhonglis eyes were just one reason more to tear him out of bed. The little glimmer of hope that his Ajax would’ve joined him and he could’ve gotten the chance to wrap his arms around him and bury his face in the crook of his neck…not supposed to happen tonight.
But all slight disappointment Zhongli felt flew out the window, once he entered his own office, seeing Childe who had fallen asleep on the table. His exhaustion was worrying, but Zhongli could only notice the little trail of drool on his chin, the long strand of hair that fell over his eyes and his very quiet snoring, all framed together by the gentle morning light making its way into the small room through gaps of the curtains.
He had only given him another little kiss on the head, not waking his boyfriend up, deeming it unnecessary this early on a weekend-day. Furthermore, the boy thoroughly needed his rest. He grabbed the empty teacup from yesterday and went to clean it in the shared kitchen of the funeral parlor, sighing when he met a certain director.
"Letter from Snezhnaya" Hu Tao said, dangling her legs from the counter, "Probably for the Fatui boy."
"Good morning to you too, director." Zhongli said with a tiniest bit of annoyance in his voice, though he could never get mad at this endearing young woman.
"Some woman dropped it off here a bit ago, wore a purple coat or something" She slid the letter over the counter towards sink, where the consultant was currently cleaning the dirty cup. "Funny how they already know he’s spending so much time here, no?" Zhongli only let out a chuckle, "You have my thanks for accepting this letter." He told her.
"Now, now, not a problem! Do you know why he was up so late yesterday though?"
Zhongli stood by the doorframe, trying to gather all his information to answer the question, while hiding his own worries. "I suspect it has something to do with the Tsaritsa…though I m not sure, as he is very discreet about this." He took the letter and put it on a little shelf next to him, not daring to inspect it further.
"Well, I’ll let you settle this all yourse-"
"What do we have here?" a voice pierced the room as Childe made his steps towards it, hugged Zhonglis waist with one arm, pulled him closer and kissed his cheeks with a wide grin on his face. "Good morning, Xiansheng!"
Hu Tao jumped down from the counter, hands on her hips she sighed: “There are the lovebirds.“ she chuckled. “I’ll leave you two alone then. Have fun doing whatever you need to do. I’ll come back this evening to finish up work concerning some clients."She walked towards the door, but before leaving, she gave Childe a menacing glare and an amused smirk. “And Fatui” she called out to him. “Behave yourself. Don’t create more work for me and my dear consultant here." He pulled Zhongli closer to him, unconsciously or not.
Childe stared at her with a disgusted yet amused look. "Yeah, yeah and who’re you calling lovebirds? I know you’re off to get with your pink…adeptus thing woman-"
As Hu Tao walked out she said one last thing. "Continue talking about Yanfei like that and you’ll be the next person getting a discount for your coffin. Just because I’m nice. <em>Bye now~</em>" she waved back, leaving the entrance to the funeral parlor. Silence filled the room until Childe broke it with a sigh.
"Sorry for not going to bed with you Xiansheng…" he said ashe pulled the man towards him, admiring everything he had to offer in this comfortable yet usually insignificant morning. "It’s fine, I was aware you had a lot to take of. Though I see you’ve already tidied up for today, haven’t you." As he spoke, a hand reached out towards the long strand of ginger hair almost covering Childe’s right eye, putting it behind his ear to smile fondly at the ocean blue eyes. They could only be admired for a moment before they looked away all flustered. Childe took his hands back to himself to tidy his collar, just to have something to do with his hands,
"A-Anyway…" not knowing where he actually wanted to take this conversation now. Entranced by the gloved hand he felt brush over his cheeks, the genuine smile, the warm eyes…as if it was his first day of looking upon this man. Meanwhile all the man in question was happy about, was that the bickering between these two distracted him of the letter worrying him. For a little longer it will stay as a weight in his heart, not on his mind.
Zhongli left Childes barely-existent-broken-up-by-embarassment-grasp to make himself some tea. “Would you like some as well? Oolong or Tieguanyin? They go very well in the morning because of their slightly bitter taste.”
"Uhh…the uh second one. Uh you know- I’ll go clean up your office desk real quick, I’ll be right back-"
"One quick question!" Zhongli said, awkwardly reaching out his hand to Childe looking back. "Would you like to have your breakfast here or go out today?"
After some quick thinking, Childe responded that he wanted to stay inside. After all, he remembered it would only be the two of them for the most part of the morning. Most employees come later and this kitchen is used mostly by only the consultant and director. He went back to the office, hearing the water boil quietly. How oddly serene, this moment nearing silence.
Childe threw away every concept he had made last night after seeing that a letter from Snezhnaya had arrived. There was no way of changing anything now. Instead of sulking on it, he distracted himself by cleaning up the place.
Conflictingly, Zhongli read the tea while waiting for the tea to be ready as he had prepared everything else on the table already.
"By the Tsaristas benelovent will, the 11th Fatui harbinger Tartaglia has not been called to regroup in the palace of Morepesok, but rather be dismissed in the nation of Inazuma, discerning the situation as well as notifying responsible authorities.
-Pulcinella"<
And this was only the most striking paragraph of the letter. So much more to uncover. So much more to ache, but only if you let it.
"Did you read when?"
"They want you to have arrived by the end of this week."
"But that‘d be-"
"in 2 days"
Zhongli didn’t turn around. He continued preparing the herbs for the tea, slowly inserting them, packed in a little bag of thin leaves.
Childe sat down, letter in his hand, though now crinkled.
"It’s what I’ve been trying to avoid, but this outcome is even worse."
Zhongli put the tray with tea on the table, seating himself as well while taking the lid off of the container of wontons.
"I apologize, they’re only leftovers from yesterday. I haven’t had time to cook."
No eye contact, why would there be. The man is sitting up straight, properly, gracefully handling the chopsticks and sipping his tea; Childe knows he’s hurt. He could use his stone-cold facade to convince everyone but Childe…that trick won’t work on him. He knows how Zhongli is, he’s experienced him in all its facets. His deep yet composed anger, his genuine joy and also his silent sorrow. They've gone through so much more than they could handle, on their own and together, yet somehow they got through. The water carried them through. If he knew all that, why could he not know what to say in the moment. The heat of the moment-nonono it wasn’t. It’s calm, there’s nothing happening yet the ocean his raging. The coast is silent but the waves are breaking.
"I’m sorry Xiansheng its- I didn’t want to go back to go Snezhnaya so soon, but this is even worse."
Zhongli took a frustrated sip from his cup.
"Now I can’t even do any good for the Tsaritsa directly. Gather information…as if they truly needed me on those lonely Inazuma islands…"
Zhongli stayed silent.
How pathetic, wasn’t it? Great job, Childe.
"I’m sorry Xiansheng."
You tried to comfort your partner about a message, and now you’re on the verge of breaking down about it yourself. Truly pathetic. Maybe it would be for the best if he really had to leave-
"It’s fine, Ajax. Your duties are an important aspect of your life. You need to serve your-"
he had to breathe in for a moment.
"Serve your archon, don’t you? Every task is an important one. I’m sure she appreciates your impeccable skills well enough."
He put some of the food on the plate in front of Childe.
"I suppose so but-"
"Furthermore, you’ve been in Liyue for a long…long time. Has it not been half a year since we first met?"
"But it’s only been a few weeks since we…you know…” the words were struggling to come out. "Since we made up."
Silence.
It contrast to Zhongli, Childes sorrow was a lot less…silent. While Zhongli was like gentle still waters that reached deep into the darkest depths, Childe was a tall wave just waiting to break, storing all of its force in its roots on the surface of the ocean.
"I just wish we could’ve spent more time together." The young man started raising his voice. Not with anger, just frustration. Not towards his partner, but towards fate that turned the whole world against them. "I’ve found the purest happiness I could fine for once in my pathetic life, wanted to cuddle with you every night, watch some of Liyues operas, battle some more. Wanted you to tell me stories and..." Childe sighed. He had this opportunity to experience a domestic life and now it was ending all too soon.
Many things did end to soon, that was not a foreign concept to Tartaglia. The way the light in the eyes of the prosperous young boy died out after his childhood ended too son, after Ajax was no more, too early in his lifespan. Just when Tartaglia could take off his mask, just when Tartaglia could be Ajax again he gets sent to a mission in Inazuma, where he should gather information about whatever mess of events had occurred there.
"But aren’t you happy, being able to serve your archon?" Zhongli asked him smiling with no humour decorating his lips.
"It might be one of the greatest things I have going for me. I’ll serve her majesty the Tsaritsa with no doubt-"
"Yet you’re doubting the decision."
after a little silence the man pouted and said "It’s because of you dumbass…"
Zhongli had to chuckle when he looked at him, this time with some amusement filling his mind and warmth in his heart. "Hey, what’re you laughing for!"
Zhongli took another sip from his cup. "You’re cute when you’re upset." he said as a provocative grin adorned his lips.
If Childes cheeks weren’t tinged pink before, they were now burning red for sure. "Are you underestimating the power of a harbinger?!" He declared jokingly…half-jokingly. His battle-lust always gets the best of him.<
"Oh my dearest," another sip as he looked away, covering his mouth. "I would never!"
The excitement in Childes voice rose. "Let’s spar, Xiansheng!"
"Once your plate is empty."
“But then we’ll-“
"I promise." He laughed.
"Oh my archons I’m totally beat…" Childe said slumping into Zhonglis bedroom, tossing off most of his clothes. "Me aswell…You put up a rather…fierce fight today." The elder said, changing into his nightgown clothes. "You don’t want to change into different clothes? The nights get cold around this time. I advise against sleeping without clothes."
"You’ll be enough warmth for me." The harbinger said while slipping beneath the sheets, patting the empty space besides him. Soon enough his boyfriend laid down next to him.
They got comfortable and Childe threw his arm around Zhongli's waist, he pulled him close and tight. He buried his face in the back of his neck, next to where Zhonglis open ponytail spread onto the pillow. But his body was stiff, more than usual.
"Hey Xiansheng...let me see you" Zhongli turned around, hesitantly, though he looked away with his eyes. Childe brushed a brown strand of hair behind his beloveds ear, cupping his cheek. "What is it? Went too hard on you?" he said with a grin, though there were a lot more emotions behind that than he would like to admit. Zhongli chuckled; nonetheless his eyes were red and wet, and his mind anything but peace. He threw his arms around Childes shoulder, hugging him tight. His fingers felt the muscles on his boyfriends back, the ginger hair on his neck and buried his face in the crook of his neck. Ah.
Childe was disappointed in his lack of being able to comfort his lover in this very moment. He pressed a kiss onto his forehead, but everything else he returned was a pressuring silence and an exchange of quiet, shaky breaths while the hug tightened from both sides. "I'm sorry Ajax, I didn't mean to get this emotional." he whispered, no way he would get this weak...still he felt safe, as if he could let his feelings out, tell Ajax how he feels. He knew Ajax would not judge him. He knew Ajax would love him during his weakest moments. Another kiss. "It's okay. There's no need to be sorry." Silence. What a predicament.
"Hey now, I promise when I get back, I'll spend all the time in the world with you. And I'll never stop thinking about you while I'm gone, mark my words!" he said overly enthusiastically. "I promise, Xiansheng. Once this is all over, we can return to what we had." But when would that once be. After he has finished his current mission, his duty as harbinger will forever claw at his back and tear him back into the cold lands of her majesty. And Childe will oblige, because neither Tartaglia nor Ajax would ever give up their loyalty for their archon, but how could he ever give up his love for the one before him. Though what they had and what they will have, should that not be enough? No time like the present.
"We're gonna go out and eat in fancy restaurants, I'll buy you everything you could ever want, I swear I'll give you everything I can-."
"No." Zhongli responded with his baritone voice to which Childe was a bit startled and scared, almost in shock, but before he could worry his mind over unnecessary overthinking, Zhongli followed up and told him "You're enough. As long as I know you're with me, It'll be enough." admiring the way his deep blue eyes seemed to light up for a moment, the way his long lashes fluttered and his soft cheeks got tainted in a light shade of red. How good it must feel when one gets told something as simple as you're enough. Ajax was enough. The very same Ajax felt like crying. the waves on his ocean were rising and immediatley on the verge of breaking. How could he have landed the perfect jackpot with this man. How could he have found someone so indescribably perfect for him. Someone who made him feel loved and appreciated, someone he would choose to spend the rest of his puny little lifespan with, someone who made his ocean rage so overwhelmingly.
Zhongli made him smile, grin, chuckle, feel this deep warmth in his heart that once bloomed and kept growing ever since.
"You're beautiful."
"Pardon?"
"Said you're beautiful. The most attractive man I've ever seen. Inside and out."
Zhongli looked away, unusually flustered. "Now what would this be for...?"
"Nothing. It's just the truth. The ships leaving the day after tomorrow. Wanted to tell you about all the things you are such as breathtaking, stunning...," he brushed a strand of hair away from Zhongli's face and caressed his cheek gently. "perfect..."
"I'm going to miss you..." Zhongli mumbled, snuggled into the crook of Childes neck.
"What, can't live a day without some compliments?" Childe said jokingly, letting out a chuckle with a hint of desperation.
"Can't live a day without you." and maybe its true. This strong-willed, independent god got so charmed by this harbinger, the one who was just a weapon in a contract he once settled.
And now he will leave for an undefined duration. The only thing he can hope for is not to loose this bond what made the both of them so utterly vulnerable yet so strong in a way none other could have achieved.
"Love you, Zhongli." Childe mumbled before drifting into sleep, hugging his partner tightly while feeling his warm breath on his body. The waves have broken, the air is calm, the night cold and the waters still..
"Did Zhongli seriously not finish the work I told him to do? Oh my..." Hu Tao said slightly aggravated, but once she peeked through the door to Zhonglis office, she only sighed, seeing them sleep together in this serene silence and a warm embrace. Yanfei tugged at her hand. "C'mon, let's leave them alone. There's enough time for everything tomorrow." Hu Tao nodded and got dragged up to her room. Tomorrow would be another day. Only one more day.