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Heart And Blood
The prison was as cold and depressing as prisons always are, the clanging doors and buzzing of security locks echoed with a loneliness that mirrored most of the men in here. She had been coming here for five months now – one visit per month, in her free time. The warden knew her by reputation, and that got her a bit of leeway when it came to visiting. She never showed her FBI credentials here though, always visiting as a civilian as opposed a Federal Agent. There was something more… honest about coming here purely as herself. Besides, it wouldn’t do David much good if word got round that the Feds were visiting him.
Emily Prentiss sighed as she watched one set of steel bars slide open, only for another set to replace them. Prisons were there to punish, and that was fine with her – she’d sent her fair share of assholes to rot in institutions like this during her tenure in law enforcement… but she couldn’t help but wish young David Smith had escaped the gut wrenching sentence that he had received.
“He’s waiting for you.”
“Thanks Officer.” She nodded. She’d been given permission for private visitation and for that she was glad. She’d left some magazines for David at the front desk which would reach him once they’d been checked, and she had anonymously put a little money in his commissary account. It wasn’t much, but she hoped it would help.
The door to the little visiting room closed behind her and she regarded the blond teenager who sat sullenly handcuffed to the table.
“Hi.” She said, sitting down opposite him.
“Hi.” He mumbled back, not raising his eyes from the surface of the table.
David had been getting more withdrawn, and each time Emily visited it seemed harder to get through to him. “How have you been?” she asked.
A shrug.
She could see the fading bruises on his face and the fresher ones on his knuckles. “Looks like you’ve been fighting?”
Another shrug.
“David… that won’t help you.” This was met with silence, so she pressed “Do you hear what I’m saying?”
“You’re not in here, you don’t know what it’s like.” He said.
She was surprised by the anger in his tone. “That’s true, I guess. But everyone finds themselves in situations where… fighting seems like the only way – but in here it’ll just get you more time.”
“I’m never getting out anyway so what does it matter.”
“It matters because the more you fight the more you’ll lose yourself. I don’t want that to happen, David. I want you to be who you really are. I want you to see the person that I see.”
“I don’t know who that is.” He said, looking up at her.
Emily smiled. “Do you remember when we met? You were so little, but you had something special, David. You were smart and kind and sweet.” She saw in his eyes that he still had feelings for her, despite the angry tone to his voice.
“I remember.” He said.
“You know, you had two opportunities to shoot me, but you didn’t. You’re a young man who never had a chance to become the person he should have been. Your childhood was stolen, and your youth was stolen but you never wanted violence. If you did then I would be dead by now.”
“I wouldn’t have shot you.” He said.
“I know. I know because when you were seven you didn’t do it, no matter how hard your dad tried to make you. I know you, David, and I knew you wouldn’t shoot me at nineteen either - I could see it in your eyes. You had a lot of choices taken away from you, and… I can’t fix that for you, but I can listen to you, and I can be there for you as much as I am able.” She raised her brows and smiled again.
“You’re the only person who ever told me the truth.” He said.
“And I always will, for better or worse. I’m listening. Want to talk about it?”
He shook his head. “Talking won’t help.” His eyes returned to the table.
“You’d be surprised David. I used to think exactly like you, y’know. But I was wrong.”
Silence.
“Look at me David. Please? You owe me that, at least.”
He raised his eyes again and regarded her, the woman who still held his heart.
She smiled for him. “That’s better hmm? I can see you now.”
“I don’t want you to come anymore.”
“Why not?”
“It isn’t helping anymore.”
“It will if you let it.” she reached across the table and took his hand, rules be damned.
David flinched and started to pull away but she held onto his hand firmly.
“Talk to me David. I’m here for you just like I promised.“
She’d been coming once a month, setting the time aside from her schedule to make sure she didn’t let him down again. She imagined this was how a parent must feel dealing with a teenager and she wondered if she was as much a pain in the butt as this for her mom? No, she was much worse, she knew that. She tried a different tack to get him talking. “How are your sessions going?” She’d arranged for a psychiatrist friend of hers to take David on as a patient. “Do you like her?”
David nodded. “She’s nice.”
“Good. You need to keep on seeing her, David, and talking to her – even if you want me to stop coming, please don’t stop seeing her.”
“Why do you still bother with me? I don’t deserve it. There are better people you could see. You’re wasting your time.”
“It’s my time to waste, isn’t it? I made you a promise. I keep my word.”
She was the only constant in his life and David found his eyes filling with tears as her thumb stroked the bruises on his knuckles.
“Do you really want me to stop coming?” she asked softly.
He shook his head. “No.”
“Well then, let’s talk, huh? Tell me about the things you do in here - your classes. I hear you’re still creative – woodworking, right?”
“I…like to use my hands.” He said. “To make things and not destroy them.”
“That’s good.”
“Emily?”
“Uh-huh?”
“I…I do appreciate what you tried to do for me. In court.”
Emily nodded. “I…wish it was more.”
As arresting officer, she’d been called as a witness for the prosecution – but she made damn sure that she wasn’t remotely hostile. In fact, she’d been asked to testify against Elizabeth Rhodes at her trial, and that counted well for David’s own defence. It was an unusual situation, and as Emily had known David since he was a boy, she was given a little leeway in her testimony and she took what some might call carte blanche to offer her profile of the troubled boy. Everyone knew that comments struck from the record were still heard and remembered by the jury. It got her in a bit of hot water with the Judge, but Hell, hot water was pretty normal for her.
In the long run, David was still sentenced to multiple life terms, but he avoided a maximum security wing and was mandated psychiatric and rehabilitative help. Emily’s position as BAU Unit Chief, as well as her history with Interpol carried much weight - and her words in mitigation for David, and her conviction that he was put under coercive duress by Rhodes, went a long way in deciding what treatment David would receive once he was sentenced.
It was the best she could do, and she really did wish she could have done more – but maybe, maybe this was the best place for him to get the help he needed – so long as he took the opportunity to use that help.
“The things you said about me in court?” He blushed and looked coyly away. “No one’s ever stood up for me before.”
Emily smiled and gave his hand a tighter squeeze. “That’s why I’m here, that’s why I want to see you. I won’t let you down again. The things I said were true.”
“But you got in trouble over me.”
She shrugged. “Believe me, I’ve been in worse trouble in my life. Things like that pass. The way you’re feeling now will pass. If you keep seeing Dr Green, and being open with her, you’ll find you again.”
“I will keep seeing her.” He nodded. “And… please… don’t stop coming to see me, Emily?”
“I won’t. I’ll be here next month and I don’t wanna see those next time.” She said, tapping the bruises on his knuckles. “If someone’s giving you trouble, you tell me, okay, and I’ll get something done about it.”
He shrugged again. “It isn’t too bad, it just…it’s just a couple of the guys…”
Emily could feel a strange maternal instinct coming over her and she tensed her jaw as she asked “Have they hurt you David?”
He nodded and his shoulders started to shake s his tears came.
Emily rose from her chair, walked around the table and squatted down next to him. She took his hand again and whispered “I’ll make that stop, okay?”
“How? It’ll make it worse if they find out I’ve told.”
“Leave it to me, David. I think Dr Green will back me up when we tell the Warden that you should be re-assigned as Cat C. I’ll speak to your lawyer, and they can start the application. That should get you out of harm’s way. It might take a little while, but with the two of us pushing, it should happen.”
“Thank you.” He said, wiping at his eyes.
Emily pulled a tissue from her pocket and dabbed his eyes for him. “Better?”
He nodded. “I... I love you, Emily.”
She smiled. “I know you do, David.”
“I always have.”
“I know.” She leant her head against his arm, and he rested his chin on her hair.
David closed his eyes as he smelt her hair, picking out the underlying fragrance of her shampoo, the faint musk in her perfume. He could smell her lipstick.
“We’ll make things better for you, David.” She said, carefully standing and heading back around the table.
“Do you have to go? ” He asked, even though he knew damn well that she wouldn’t be staying in the men’s prison with him.
“Time’s nearly up – but I’ll be back next month. You be good, David, and keep seeing Dr Green.”
“I will.” He looked up at her sadly. “Bye.”
“Goodbye, David.” She took another look at him, sitting alone there, before heading back into the main body of the prison. She would have a few ‘phone calls to make tonight, that was for sure. She would get it done, she would make sure he was protected from now on.