Chapter Text
***
"What is Lee Minhyuk doing? Why does it take so long for him to buy our drinks?" She plopped her body and straightened her back on the couch.
"Don't rest yet, Seokkyung-ah! Help me take this photo down." She saw her brother standing in front of her, pointing at the photo behind her.
"Can't you wait for Minhyuk to come back?"
"Let's finish this quickly before Jeni comes home."
She sighed before reluctantly standing up and facing the photo her brother was referring to. He then ordered her to stand on the other side of the photo and helped him take down the biggest photo in Rona's living room, a photo of Rona and her mother.
Photo of Rona and her mother …
She stared at their photo that she and Seokhoon had just taken down, a tight feeling in her chest.
"Oppa …"
"Hmm?" Her brother looked at her.
"Do you think Rona will forgive me?" She glanced back at their photo. The happy smiles on the faces of Rona and her mother seemed to pierce her chest. How presumptuous she was to take their happiness away.
"Seokkyung-ah …" He touched her shoulder.
Tears started to well up in her eyes. The guilt that filled her chest was now more unbearable.
"If Rona finds out that I was the one who told Ms. Jin about Eunbyeol at her house. If Rona finds out that I purposely bought time by coming to the restaurant that time. Will Rona forgive my actions?"
"I won't let her forgive you."
A voice she knew didn't come from her brother, nor Lee Minhyuk was heard behind her. Jeni stood staring at her angrily.
"Tsh, I already guessed it. When Rona blamed herself for not coming home that time because of meeting you, I thought you must have done that on purpose. And it turned out to be true. Wow, you really ..."
"Jeni-ya-"
"Get out of here!! Why did you come here?" Jeni shouted at them before pulling her hand away. And she could only let Jeni do that. She was too weak because of her guilt.
"How dare you enter Rona's house after what you did to Rona? Have you no shame?!" Pushing her out the door, Jeni said to her cruelly. Jeni's push, which was surprisingly stronger than what she thought, was able to knock her down.
"I know… and I'm sorry for not telling you. But we just wanted to help." Her brother helped her up.
"No, I don't need your help."
"Jeni-ya ..." She then approached Jeni, she sincerely wanted to apologize. But Jeni didn't let her say a word let alone an apology.
"You!! Take your brother and go away from here!" Jeni once again pushed her away.
"Jeni-ya!!!" Minhyuk ran to Jeni while carrying the package of drinks they ordered earlier.
"Minhyuk-ah, don't tell me you knew they were here and let them in?" Jeni looked at the package they were carrying before lashing out at him.
"I don't know either. Really! I was surprised when I entered Rona's house, they were already there."
"Minhyuk is honest, he doesn't know." She heard her brother defending Lee Minhyuk.
But instead of showing her annoyance, Jeni laughed. She, her brother, and even Minhyuk were surprised by Jeni's behavior.
"Whoaa, I feel deja vu. Don't you guys feel deja vu too?" Jeni asked sinisterly. Seokkyung could only stare at her brother, not understanding what Jeni was saying. Watching them fall silent Jeni folded her arms across her chest before continuing her words.
"Did you forget? Last year we stood in the same place. It's just that I and Minhyuk stood where you were before and you stood where I and Minhyuk were."
She then remembered the incident a year ago, when they helped Rona unpack her things. Jeni was right, now the position was reversed. Literally as well as implicitly.
"At that time, you were standing next to Rona … helping and protecting her from my and Minhyuk's anger. I thought you would continue like that, standing by her side. Helping her and protecting her. Who would have thought that things would turn out to be the other way around. Instead of protecting her, you just made her suffer more."
Jeni's statement immediately silenced them. A tight feeling of guilt filled her chest again. And she knew that Seokhoon also felt what she felt.
"Jeni-ya, stop it already." She could hear Minhyuk trying to help them. But instead of stopping, Jeni forcibly grabbed the package Minhyuk was holding and took out a drink before opening the lid. Without hesitation, Jeni doused her with the contents of the drink. And threw the empty glass to the wall behind them afterward.
"Jeni-ya!!" Minhyuk's surprised shout she didn't hear. Likewise with the words of her brother who asked if she was okay. She wiped the water off her face without getting annoyed because she felt she deserved it.
"Do you remember all the things you did to Rona and her mother, Joo Seokkyung? Do you remember when you poured water on Ms. Oh and humiliated her on your father's engagement day with Ms. Cheon? Do you remember when you threw red paint at Rona? Accusing Ms. Oh of killing your mother? DO YOU REMEMBER, JOO SEOKKYUNG?!?!!" Jeni shouted at her. Her voice shook her feeling, tightening her chest even more.
"You only did evil things to Rona, hurt her, hurt her mother. Still believing her mother killed your mother after the truth came out. You were always cruel to her. You even bullied me just for giving her bread. And now, coupled with your sin of helping Ms. Jin, you still asking if Rona will forgive you?" She heard Jenny laugh.
"You should have asked yourself first. If things were reversed and you were in her position, would you forgive her? Look at what you've done to her when her mother was accused of murdering your mother. Now you shamelessly expect Rona to forgive you? Don't make me laugh!"
"I know!" She couldn't stand the tightness in her chest anymore. She looked at Jenny.
"I know, Rona and you definitely won't forgive me. I know that!"
"Then why are you here? Go! We don't need you here!!" Jeni emphasized the word 'go' by keeping pushing her.
"You are a cruel woman ..." She said without thinking. The pain in her heart, the tears of guilt that had now flowed, made the words fall out of her mouth.
"Tch, do you need a magic mirror and ask it who's the worst between us?"
"Jeni-ya, stop this. We'd better get on with our pending work. And you two, can't you just leave?" Minhyuk pulled Jeni's hand and tried to get her inside. Jeni then looked at her before looking at her brother.
"As I said, I won't let Rona forgive you two because you don't deserve it."
"Okay, I understand. Let's go, Seokkyung-ah." The weak and heartbroken voice she heard from Seokhoon, awakened her to something. The guilt for Rona was added to her brother, making her kneel in front of Jeni.
"Seokkyung-ah…" Minhyuk and her brother simultaneously sounded surprised. But she didn't hear anything from Jeni.
"I know you won't forgive me. Even me kneeling probably won't bring you to convince Rona to forgive me. So I won't beg for forgiveness. But Jeni-ya ..." She then raised her head and looked at Jeni.
"Please, forgive my brother. Of all the people who hadn't a slight desire to hurt Rona, it was my brother. He loved Rona very much. What he did, everything he did to hurt Rona was because of me. I always forbade him to help Rona. Because he didn't want to hurt my feelings, he couldn't refuse my request. And in order to find my whereabouts, he broke up with Rona so he could convince my father to have him by his side. Please, Jeni-ya. Forgive my brother." She raised her hands, apologizing, tears welling up in her eyes along with her apologies for Seokhoon.
"Seokkyung-ah, what are you doing? Stand up!" Her brother pulled her arm to bring her to stand up.
"Please, Jeni-ya. Forgive my brother, let him accompany Rona later." She brushed off his hand.
"You think you kneel and beg like that, I'll soften? I won't. Neither you nor Joo Seokhoon deserves it. Both of you don't deserve to be by Rona's side." Jeni's answer drove her to be a little annoyed. She knew she didn't deserve it. But Seokhoon? Only Rona has the right to judge it. She then stood up and faced Jeni.
"You are not Rona. Only Rona has the right to say whether or not my brother deserves it. Only Rona has the right to decide whether to give him a second chance or not!" She wiped her tears before shouting at her.
"Stop it, Joo Seokkyung!!" Seokhoon warned her. She heard laughter come out of Jeni's mouth again.
"You think I'm saying this because I don't know what Rona wants?"
"What do you mean?"
Instead of answering her question, Jeni walked past her and into her apartment. She looked at her brother in confusion. Not long after, Jeni came out. She reached out and showed them an envelope with Seokhoon's name written on it. Her brother then took the envelope that was offered by Jeni.
"This is-"
"I found this letter on the day of Rona's accident. I should apologize for reading it without your permission, but I don't regret it because I seem to have made the right decision. Read it, Joo Seokhoon. And you'll understand why I strongly forbade you to see Rona." Jeni said in her usual tone as if she was no longer angry with them.
And Jeni walked away from them, pulling Minhyuk into Rona's apartment. Silence fell shortly after the sound of the door closing. She turned to her brother, thinking that he was silent because he had read the letter Jeni had given him earlier. But apparently, he just stared at the letter in silence. She didn't know what he was thinking.
So it was with their return to the Penthouse. Her brother was very quiet, a blank look in his eyes. She didn't dare say anything to him. She truly did not know what she should do.
"Can you give me Rona's diary?" When her brother finally spoke, it was not long after they had entered the Penthouse. And she could only take Rona's diary from her bag without saying anything. Still didn't know what to say to comfort her brother.
"Please tell mom I'm not coming to dinner." Sadness could be heard in his voice.
"You're not going to have dinner?" She wanted to erase the sad look in his eyes.
Her brother shook his head before answering. "Just ask the maid to bring dinner to my room."
Without waiting for her answer, her brother walked away from her, exposing his frail back. The back looked limp as it is too heavy to withstand the weight that continues to increase.
And her efforts to lighten his burdens, seem to have only added to his burden.
"Joo Seokkyung, why are you so stupid?"
***
Seokkyung didn't know what she was doing, or what she wanted to do here. In front of the closed door of Rona's apartment. Everything was already cleared, what happened before here gave closure with a clear ending. Jeni won't forgive them. Jeni won't let Rona forgive her and her brother. Everything was clear. Jeni's reasons were also clear.
However, this was still unfair. Not for her but Seokhoon. She could accept any punishment. She could accept that Jeni and later Rona will not forgive her. She realized that her actions didn't deserve forgiveness. All of the things she had done to Jeni, Rona, and her mother were the perfect reasons for them to not forgive her. However, Seokhoon deserves better. Her brother is a good person, the best person who always wanted to protect the people he cares about. So, it's not fair if her brother got punished like her.
The bell rang as a result of the decision she had made. All of the time, it was her brother who always sacrificed for her. Did everything for her and protected her. Now maybe it's time for her to repay her brother. Seokkyung was determined to redeem all her sins. And the first thing she had to do was redeem her sin to her brother. The sad back of her brother that she saw earlier pulled something that hurt her chest. The back looked broken, tired of carrying everything. And she wanted to lighten it even if just a little.
The door opened revealing Minhyuk instead of Jeni, the person she wanted to meet.
"Seokkyung-ah, why are you here again?" Minhyuk said to her while occasionally looking back. She understood the worry in his tone. But she ignored it and shifted her head to the side while looking inside Rona's apartment.
"YOO JENI!" She shouted, calling her former school friend.
"Seokkyung-ah, what are you doing?" Minhyuk pulled her hand to get her attention. But she still ignored it and turned her eyes inside the house again.
"YOO JENI! I WANT TO TALK TO YOU. I KNOW YOU'RE INSIDE." She couldn't just stand at the door. She needed to find Jeni and talk to her. Her feet began to move to enter Rona's apartment.
"Stop it, Joo Seokkyung!" Minhyuk pulled her arm away from the door again before closing it.
"Are you crazy?"
She looked at Minhyuk, "I don't care if you think I'm crazy. But I need to meet Jeni."
"Jeni doesn't want to meet you, don't you get that from the treatment you just got from her?"
"I know, but Minhyuk-ah. I have to meet Jeni."
"But Jeni doesn't want to meet you! How many times do I need to say it? Wasn't it obvious what happened earlier?"
"I-" Before she could finish, the door swung open. Her eyes immediately turned in that direction. Jeni came out and glared at her.
"What is it again Joo Seokkyung?" Jeni folded her arms over her chest.
"I want you to listen to me." She moved away from Minhyuk and stood in front of Jeni.
"I am busy." Jeni looked away.
"I know that, I won't be long."
Jeni just looked back at her but only for a moment before looking away again. But the girl didn't protest and didn't move from her spot. As if she wanted to hear what she wanted to say.
"Jeni-ya ..." She started in a tone she never used whenever she spoke to Jeni. The usual tone full of arrogance and superiority that she always used because she always saw Jeni as someone below her level, she threw away. Quite the opposite. She used the tone that Jeni used when she talked to her. A tone as if Jeni realized that she was below her level.
"You may have known me and Seokhoon for less than Lee Minhyuk, but you were always around us so you know how protective my brother is to me." She lowered her head, starting what she wanted to tell her.
"My brother acted like that to me because my father abused us. My father always tortured us when we didn't live up to his expectations. You two probably don't know that, right?" She raised her head to look at the surprised Minhyuk, before turning back to Jeni who gave her a look she couldn't read. Does she feel sorry for her or does she think it's a lie?
"I'm not a smart kid like my brother. All my achievements when I was in middle school were thanks to cheating, and yes … with my father's help. But not my brother. He's truly a smart person, a genius. Both in his study and his talent at playing piano. He had all of those because he didn't want to be tortured … because he didn't want me to be tortured. He studied and studied to reach my father's expectations. Not like this lazy and stupid me who only relied on his help." She chuckled.
"My brother was very protective of me because we only have each other. My mother was very busy taking care of the girl who she thought was her biological daughter in the hospital. And my father was only there when he wanted to abuse us. That stupid Joo Seokhoon even always followed all my wishes and sacrificed for me. "
"Jeni-ya… my brother wasn't a bad person. He became bad because of me. He joined Min Seola's bullying because of me. I'm the bad one, Jeni-ya. I'm the bad one." Her voice trembled slightly when she talked about what she did to her late sister.
"Jeni-ya… I know you won't forgive me. But I'll still apologize. I'm sorry for bullying you. I'm sorry for telling everyone about your father. I'm sorry for ruining your SNU test and making you fail. I'm sorry … very sorry..." She paused for a moment because her voice was muffled, holding back her emotions, suppressing the urge to cry even though tears were starting to well up.
"And I know I don't deserve Rona's forgiveness. I accept if you tell Rona not to forgive me. I can't even forgive myself. You know? When I saw the photo of Rona and her mother. It hurt me so much knowing my mistake in telling Ms. Jin about Eunbyeol's whereabouts leading to her death. I can't believe I took their happiness away. You were right when you said that if I were in Rona's position, I wouldn't forgive myself. Ever! I still can't forgive what I did to the person who found out that I was my mother's biological daughter. I truly regret it. So I can accept whatever Rona will do to me. If you or Rona never forgive me, I can accept it … but my brother …" Tears immediately fell as she recalled her brother's back. When she recalled her brother's puffy eyes. When she recalled how his hand never wanted to let Rona's hand go in the hospital.
"My brother … doesn't deserve all this. He always sacrifices for me. Trying to be the best brother for me. Even if it has to hurt his own feelings. When he can choose what is right and choose what he wants for himself. I broke him. And that's what's happening now … He's … he's broken inside."
"I … I realized I was the worst sister. Both for my brother and my biological sister. And I realized I couldn't redeem all my sins for my sister because it was too late. But, at least … at least I can redeem all my sins to the brother who always protects me, even after he knows I'm not his real sister, he still accepts me. He still treats me as his twin sister " Her tears couldn't stop falling.
"So Jeni-ya, I can't just stand by watching him suffer. I can no longer watch him torture himself. He's in so much pain, Jeni-ya … trust me." She then took Jeni's hand and held it with both hands. Jeni tried to pull her hand away, but she held it firmly.
"Let him accompany Rona later. Give him one more chance to be by her side again-"
"I told you this wasn't just my wish, but-"
"Yeah, I understand. But let him prove it to Rona once again. Let him be by her side. I'm not asking you to convince Rona to forgive and give him a chance. I just want you to let him be by Rona's bedside. It hurt him so much to not see her, not be by her side. Please, Jeni-ya. Let him stay beside her."
Jeni looked at her, she could see her eyes were teary. She hoped that Jeni felt touched, and understood what her brother was feeling. But, instead of giving in to her, Jeni pulled her hand from her grip and glared at her.
"I don't care that Seokhoon had done everything for you, to protect you, and sacrificed his happiness for you. He still did all that even though it wasn't his want. You reap what you sow. He still decided to leave Rona and ignore her. If he feels hurt now, it's a consequence he has to accept." Jenny's words were true. But …
"Jeni-ya…" Minhyuk walked up to Jeni, looking at her for a while before continuing. "Among the three of us, the one who can see Seokhoon's sincerity towards Rona the most is you. Both you and Seokhoon are the two people who are by Rona's side, ready to pick her up when she falls. You and Seokhoon are the first to protect her. All of this time you witnessed the sincerity and love Seokhoon had for Rona." Minhyuk rubbed Jeni's arm. She saw Jeni lower her head before lifting it again and looking at Minhyuk. Tears were clearly welling up in Jeni's eyes, ready to fall along with what Jeni wanted to say.
"That's why I can't forgive him. Among all the people who shouldn't have hurt her is Seokhoon. But he still did it anyway. Leaving Rona and ignoring her. I understand ..." Jeni paused before wiping her tears that had fallen.
"... I understand that maybe he'd done that out of guilt for his father's actions because I also have those feelings. But ... I really can't forgive him for leaving her, Minhyuk-ah. Especially when everything that happened to Rona now is because Seokhoon ignored her request to meet. I can't forgive him … I can't …" Jeni cried, shedding tears that she knew were for her close friend. Minhyuk then hugged Jeni and rubbed her back.
"Jeni-ya..." She approached Jeni, wanting to do what Minhyuk did.
"So Seokkyung-ah ..." Jeni then let go of Minhyuk's embrace and looked at her.
"Don't ever beg like this again. Because it's useless. It's too late." With that, Jeni turned around and entered Rona's apartment.
"Jeni-ya ..." And she could only watch her disappear from behind the door while whispering her name.
"Don't worry about her, Joo Seokkyung." A hand touched her shoulder. She turned and saw Minhyuk looking at the closed door.
"Lee Minhyuk, can you-"
"Don't ask me to convince Jeni. Because compared to the two of us, Jeni has a stronger bond with Rona. Compared to the two of us, Jeni often hears Rona cry in the middle of the night. Just like Seokhoon, Jeni is also hurting when she sees Rona's current state. "
She nodded in understanding. Jeni is very close to Rona. The two of them even lived under the same roof. That's why she understood that Jeni won't forgive her. Not because of what she did to her but what she did to Rona.
"Give Jeni some time..." She heard Minhyuk as he wanted to comfort her. "Among all people, Jeni is probably the only one who understands you, especially Seokhoon because she also had feelings of regret towards Rona before and wanted to make up for it. Who knows Jeni will be the one to help you later."
"Minhyuk-ah, you are-" Before she could continue what she wanted to say, Minhyuk stood in front of her, raising his hand.
"Don't praise me. It's really weird to hear Seokhoon and you complimenting me."
"Tch."
"Okay, I'd better go back inside." Minhyuk gave a small smile before turning around and walking towards the door.
"Thank you, Minhyuk-ah." She saw Minhyuk turn and look at her before chuckling.
"It's really strange to hear you say such nice things without suspecting the real intentions behind it."
"Hey! I meant it."
"To be honest, Seokkyung-ah. I'm proud to see you now. You've really changed."
"Tch…" She sneered. Minhyuk shook his head at her reaction to his words. Then with a smile, she said to him, "I'm proud of you too Lee Minhyuk. You've indeed changed too."
"Right? We have to go through a lot of things to wake us up from our spoiled selves. Although we still have a long way to go to make up for it all."
"Yeah, it's true. Okay then. I'd better go back."
"You're right. I also have to go back in to help Jeni."
She nodded before walking away.
"Joo Seokkyung!" Minhyuk called her when she was near the elevator. She turned, Minhyuk was still standing in front of Rona's apartment door.
"Don't give up! Even if Jeni says it's too late, don't give up. Keep trying to make up for everything and become a worthy sister to Joo Seokhoon."
"You don't have to tell me. I know I shouldn't give up."
"Well done then." Minhyuk gave a thumbs up before opening the door and going inside.
Seokkyung was now alone in the hallway. Waiting for the elevator to open the door and bring her back to Penthouse.
Yes, without Minhyuk telling her. Seokkyung was determined not to give up. She was determined to now be a proper sister for Joo Seokhoon. Even though he wasn't her biological brother, he was still her brother. And she will do anything for his happiness.
***
Seokhoon looked at the envelope in his hand. An envelope with his name written on it. An envelope containing a letter from Rona to him. Taking a deep breath, he opened the envelope and took out its contents. Bae Rona's beautiful handwriting decorated the paper.
Seokhoon-ah,
If you're reading this letter it means you didn't come to meet me. Or you didn't try to explain the reason why you couldn't meet me, couldn't even reply to my messages. Anyway, if you receive this letter, it means I'm sure of my decision.
The first paragraph already made him feel uneasy.
Ichigo ichie,
Have you ever heard that word, Seokhoon-ah?
I just learned the word today, the day I decided to ask you to meet me.
The word has the meaning of "one opportunity, one encounter" or it can also mean
"Once in a lifetime."
I sat in this room, musing on the meaning of the word. For some reason, my memory came back to when fate brought me to be late for school on the first day I entered school. And I met you who helped me jump over the school walls. It wasn't our first meeting, but I already felt that was the moment fate brought us together. Although you probably helped me back then because of the bet you made with Seokkyung so maybe that time couldn't be said to be fate or mere coincidence.
However, Seokhoon-ah. Still, for me … that day is our fate. Ichigo ichie for me. You are still my once in a lifetime.
Seokhoon's tears began to flow, and feelings of emotion, joy, and regret were mixed.
That's why Seokhoon-ah. I asked you to meet me. I want to feel that once in a lifetime again … with you. I want the ichigo ichie moment that I felt back then. One chance for us to be together again.
But … with you reading this letter.
It seems that hope is just hope.
It seems we are not meant to be together.
And the ichigo ichie moment doesn't happen again.
Seokhoon started to sob, and the tears that came out of his eyes started to fall non-stop. Truthfully, he didn't want to continue reading Rona's letter because he knew what Rona was going to write to him.
And with this, I say goodbye to you.
After this, I can no longer lower my pride to give you one more chance. I won't give you another chance. No more 'one opportunity, one encounter'. Because that moment has passed. Because in the end, you're just a wind that blows past me, not the air that I need. Or maybe, I should make you the wind instead of the air I can't live without.
Even so, thank you for everything, Seokhoon-ah. And I want us to stay friends.
Goodbye, Joo Seokhoon.
I wish the best for you.
And please be happy.
~Rona~
Seokhoon cried, letting out all his sorrow. He wept bitterly, wailing full of regret. The study table lamp that lit up in the darkness of his room could not take off the darkness he felt. He felt dark, his heart felt dark, empty like he lost all hope. Rona's words in her letter seemed to make his life now meaningless.
He wept, without saying another word. Without being able to say another word. Even the words 'I'm sorry' couldn't come out of his mouth. He also couldn't say the words asking Rona to give him another chance. He could only cry.
He couldn't help but cry, because he knew it was over. His hope was gone. His fate to be with the person he loves the most is over. There will be no other chance.
It's all really over…
It's all too late …
And he couldn't blame anyone. He couldn't even blame fate. He could only blame himself.
He kept crying, wailing, screaming in his silent room, until who knows how long.
***