Chapter Text
When Dorian felt the hesitant nudge on his shoulder, waking him from a light sleep, he assumed that it was Dariax looking for reassurance after another nightmare. He opened his eyes, shifting to prop himself up, and was surprised to see Opal crouched next to him. Dariax was still snoring softly at his back.
"Are you alright?" Dorian whispered. At night, it was harder to see the dark streaks of ichor that lined Opal's hair, but the pure blacks of her eyes were still starkly visible in the dying firelight.
"No." Opal's voice shook.
Dorian sat up the rest of the way. "What's wrong?" He looked around the camp to see who was on watch. Orym, still. He hadn't been asleep for very long.
"I can't sleep." Opal sniffed and wiped her eyes. "Sorry to wake you."
"Don't apologize," he said automatically. "I don't mind, but...why me ? Orym is still up."
"I can't go near him, remember?" She shook with a sudden sob, and Dorian put his arm around her quickly.
"I'm sorry, I didn't think about that." Every time Orym had tried to touch Opal while she was wearing the vestige, he had recoiled and doubled over in pain, and had ended up coughing up black oil a couple of times. Dorian still wasn't sure why she had gone to him and not to Fearne or Dariax, but he wasn't going to try to make her explain when she was clearly upset. "Do you want to talk? Or just needed company?"
"Didn't want to be alone, mostly." She pressed closer to him, and he tried not to flinch as one of the thorns of the crown scraped against the fabric of his sleeve. "She's just...so loud. Even when she's not talking directly to me."
"Lolth?"
Opal nodded. "Yeah. And Ted is still quiet. Like, she's in there, she's fine, but she...I guess she hasn't recovered from what My'ratta did, or something. So the only voices in my head are my own and Evil Spider Bitch's. Sometimes it's hard to tell which is which."
"I know that feeling," Dorian said without thinking. He had never really told his friends about all of the ways that Lolth had tried to get to him, so he wasn't expecting Opal to nod again.
"I thought you might," she replied. "You...you get it."
Dorian let out an uncomfortable little laugh.
Opal grabbed his hand and gave it an understanding squeeze. "Anyway, thanks. I know we're all tired, you don't have to sit with me."
"It's alright, I don't mind," he repeated. "Do you want to…" He gestured at the ground next to him. "Lay down with us here, try to sleep?"
"Maybe. Not yet."
He let her just lean up against him for a few minutes. "What does she tell you now?" Dorian dared to ask after a while, and he was honestly surprised that she didn't pull away from him. "I mean, you already put it on."
"She says I'm not using it right," Opal said quietly. "I could have so much power, but I'm not using it. And like I keep telling her-- Her voice got harsher, angry now, but Dorian knew that wasn't directed at him so he just pulled her closer. "--I don't want her power. I already did the thing I needed it for, and I don't fucking want it anymore! Leave me alone!"
Dorian wrapped his other arm around her and let her hide her face in his shoulder. He couldn't actually keep her protected from Lolth like that, but maybe it would help her just a little. You told me you wouldn't hurt them, he thought harshly in the goddess's direction. Hey, Spider Bitch, I'm talking to you! He'd learned from the best how useful it could be to draw the enemy's attention away from the one they were targeting.
When Opal’s voice rose, Orym had whirled around in their direction. He gave Dorian a questioning look. Dorian returned a half-hearted thumbs-up. Orym crept a little closer.
What do you want? the Spider Queen sighed into his mind.
He flipped her the mental equivalent of a middle finger.
How nice. You know, I’m very busy with my reluctant champion right now.
Leave her alone, Dorian responded. You told me you wouldn’t hurt any of them.
I’m not hurting her! She’s fine! Besides, even if I was, I don’t have to hold up my end of that deal anymore. You broke your promise, Lolth reminded him.
Not necessarily! I could still get you Poska.
Lolth laughed loudly. Why would I want Poska now? Opal is a much better trophy. Two for the price of one! No, Dorian, you’re lucky I’m letting go of our deal gracefully. This could be going so much worse for you.
Dorian suppressed a shudder.
“Is she talking to you now?” Opal asked in a whisper.
“Yes.”
“I’m sorry!”
“Don’t be.”
You’re being so sweet, Lolth mocked. Does it hurt to know that you compromised your values, stopped being a good person, and it didn’t even matter in the end?
Dorian rolled his eyes. You’re running out of material.
Oh?
That one isn’t going to work on me. I don’t regret making that deal with you, and I didn’t compromise my values. My friends are my values.
Like I said, she replied. Sweet. Alright, I’ll leave poor Opal alone for a while. She does need to sleep, doesn’t she? She looks so tired. Heavy lies the head that wears the crown, and all that.
Dorian narrowed his eyes. What’s the catch?
No catch! Lolth chuckled. But I do need someone to talk to. I get lonely, after all.
You’re going to stay in my head?
I mean...I could go back to talking to the dwarf instead. His mind is just so delightfully open, even with his little kitty-cat deity watching over him.
A wave of fury hit Dorian, and he took it and hurled the full force of it at Lolth.
She was silent for a moment. Point taken. In any case, the faun confuses me and the halfling and I don’t get along, so I’ll just stay here then!
“Fine,” he muttered out loud.
“What?” Opal asked.
“Nothing, it’s alright.”
Opal sat up, no longer leaning against him. “She’s still talking to you, isn’t she? I don’t hear her in my head anymore.”
“You should try to sleep now,” Dorian said, avoiding the question.
Putting her hand up to the side of his face, Opal said, “Did you do something? Dorian, what happened? What did she tell you?”
“It’s nothing, I promise. We’re just having a conversation, you can go to sleep now.” He tried to smile at her.
Oh, now you’ve gone and worried her!
Shut up.
You just said I could stay here.
Dorian ignored that, and kept talking. “You need to rest, Opal.”
A look of uncharacteristic insight flashed across Opal’s face. “You’re distracting her so she’ll leave me alone.”
He hesitated just a little too long to be able to deny it.
Opal threw her arms around his waist and squeezed tightly. “I’d kiss you, but I’ve got all this gross black stuff on my face,” she mumbled.
Dorian laughed, returning the hug. “And now it’s on my shirt. But it’s alright. It’s not your fault.”
“You didn’t have to--”
“Come on,” he interrupted, extracting himself from the embrace. “Time for bed, alright? We want to make it to the base of the mountain tomorrow, and we’re going to need all the energy we can get.”
“What about you?” she asked.
“I’ll be fine.”
Sure you will be. We’ll have lots of fun.
Opal looked doubtful, but she let Dorian coax her to lay down. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes, I'm fine. I promise, Opal, it's alright." He took his cloak off and tucked it over her.
It's interesting how Orym keeps staring at you. He definitely doesn't trust you to talk to me, Lolth said. I don't think he trusts you at all. And you haven't even told him about our little deal, have you?
It's none of his business.
I bet he would disagree with that, she laughed. Imagine how angry he would be if he found out. Go on, imagine it.
Dorian chose not to, though she kept pushing the thought into his head like a piece of hot metal pressing against his skin. He looked over at Orym, who was only about ten feet away now.
"Everything okay?" Orym asked softly.
He nodded.
Orym narrowed his eyes, but didn't try to call him on the lie just yet.
Opal already seemed half-asleep, like she was so exhausted that the moment Lolth had left her mind, she couldn't stay awake any longer. "Thanks," she murmured again.
"Anytime. Shhh, go to sleep," Dorian said. He hesitated, then started humming a lullaby, quietly enough that it wouldn't wake Dariax who was still snoring behind him. (Though if Opal yelling at Lolth didn't wake him, there was no way that a song would.)
"Mm," Opal sighed. "You've got a pretty voice, you should sing more."
"Go to sleep," Dorian whispered again, and immediately went back to humming. He wove a little bit of magic into the music, ignoring Lolth mocking him, and Opal fell asleep even faster than she would have otherwise.
Now what? Lolth asked him.
Don't ask me. You're the one who wants to loiter in my mind. Doesn't mean I have to...entertain you.
Oh, but I do want to be entertained. And you're so entertaining. So much darkness in here that you're doing such a good job of hiding from your friends. But I think Orym sees it. It's only a matter of time before he gets tired of pretending he doesn't.
"Dorian?"
Dorian flinched, and hated himself for letting Lolth's words get to him even a little bit. "Yes, Orym?" Was his voice too tight? Was it obvious that he was hiding something?
You see what I mean?
Orym took a few more steps towards them, then winced and stepped back, putting a hand to his stomach. "Too close," he muttered. Louder, but not loudly enough to wake anyone, he added, "Did I hear right that the Spider Queen is talking to you?"
Ooh, are you going to lie to him? What will he think if you tell him I am? Then again, what will he think if you don't tell the truth? He doesn't trust you. He shouldn't trust you.
"Yes," Dorian replied, as calmly as he could.
His expression unreadable, Orym said, "Is there anything I can do?"
"You should go to sleep," Dorian said. "I'm not going to be able to, so you should get some rest. Let me take the watch."
Orym's head tilted slightly. "Absolutely not."
He doesn't trust you.
"Don't you trust me?" asked Dorian. He wished he could tell himself that Lolth had forced him to say it, but it wouldn't be true. The doubt was his own.
"I trust you . I don't trust her ." Once again, Orym tried to get closer and couldn't.
"I can handle it."
"I'm not saying you can't."
Of course he thinks you can't handle it. He thinks you're weak-willed, that you'll make a deal with me if you're left alone with me. And the best part is that he's right.
"Orym, I'm fine ," he said sharply.
"She's talking to you right now, isn't she?" Orym said.
Aren't I?
Dorian covered his ears.
Alright, now, you have to know that won't help , Lolth told him dryly.
He tried to ignore her, but Orym was hissing his name and Lolth was laughing and he was realizing exactly how pathetic and childish he must look, so he lowered his hands. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be! Are you--" Orym broke off, looking extremely worried. "Come here," he said, backing off and sitting down next to the fire.
"What?"
"Come here !"
He can't even trust you to sit twenty feet away from him.
"Shut up!" Dorian said aloud. "Shit, that wasn't to you, Orym."
"I know it wasn't. So come here." Orym patted the ground next to him.
Dorian got up slowly, but Dariax still stirred when he was no longer sitting against his back.
"Wha's goin' on?" Dariax mumbled.
"Nothing, just...getting up for my watch. Stay asleep, I'll be back soon."
Liiiiaaaarrr…
"Mm-kay, g'nigh'..."
Dorian's footsteps seemed heavy as he walked towards Orym. Orym's gaze was piercing, his brown eyes staring directly into Dorian's soul. The way that Lolth was twisting his mind, it felt like Orym could see everything, every dark thought and every secret he tried to hide. He had to force himself not to turn around and run into the jungle.
"Sit down," Orym told him, reaching up and grabbing his hand to tug him down. Dorian half-expected him to pull away instantly, vomiting black oil, but he didn't.
Without a word, Dorian sat down next to him.
Orym put a hand on his back. More gently than Dorian would have anticipated, he said, "Can you talk to me about what she's saying? Or will she...I don't know how, but will she try to hurt you?"
What's it going to be? Lolth taunted. Are you going to tell him everything, cry to him that I'm trying to hurt your delicate feelings by saying he doesn't trust you? But then he'll have to look you in the eye and either lie or prove once and for all that--
"What's it going to be?" Dorian said quietly. "Are you going to tell him everything, cry to him that I'm trying to...to hurt your delicate feelings by saying he doesn't trust you?"
Oh...interesting.
You see, he might not trust me. But I trust him, Dorian stated. You cannot take that away from me. "But then he'll have to look you in the eye and either lie or prove once and for all that...oh, interesting."
Orym's breathing faltered as Dorian repeated Lolth's words. "Is that what she's telling you?" he whispered, sounding almost devastated.
"Mm. And worse."
Rude. This is a private conversation.
"She just told me that I'm being rude, that this is a private conversation," Dorian echoed.
Petulantly, Lolth went quiet.
"What else did she say?" Orym asked. "Earlier. Why...why did you tell her to shut up?"
"I…"
"It's okay, if you can't tell me. I don't want to do anything that might make her hurt you," Orym said.
Dorian tensed, expecting Lolth to chime in with a biting comment, but it seemed like she wasn't going to say anything if he was just going to repeat it out loud. "She told me you didn't even trust me to sit twenty feet away from you, and so I told her to shut up."
Orym's hand pressed harder against his back for a moment. "I hope I don't have to tell you that I didn't ask you to come closer because I don't trust you," he said. "I just don't think you should be alone right now."
Dorian was silent.
" Not because I don't trust you," clarified Orym. "Because I don't trust the Spider Queen not to hurt you, and I need my friends to stay close to me when I think they might get hurt. So I can protect them, if I can. I trust you, Dorian."
"You shouldn't." The words fell from Dorian's lips unbidden, like boulders. Heavy. Harmful. Unstoppable.
"Whatever she's telling you, she's lying ," Orym insisted.
Oh, no, I'm not. And you know it, Dorian.
"No, she isn't," Dorian managed through a painfully constricted throat. "I'm sorry, Orym."
Orym found his hand and held it tightly between both of his own, even as Dorian tried to pull away. "Stop--stop it, I'm not letting go. Just tell me what you mean."
Go ahead. Tell him.
"She wants me to tell you. She knows you're going to despise me if I do, and she'll be thrilled ." Dorian was close to tears now, and Lolth was laughing again.
Orym paused for a long time. "Alright," he said eventually. "That's alright. You don't have to tell me." He squeezed his hand. "I trust you. Whatever it is, if you don't think I should know about it...I'll accept that. But tell me if anything happens that puts one of us in danger, please."
Dorian hunched over, holding back a sob of relief.
But he doesn't know. He doesn't know what you're hiding. He doesn't know how close you came to letting the world rot under Poska's hands, Lolth reminded him.
Orym leaned against his arm, providing some silent support as if he knew that Lolth was trying to get to him again.
It doesn't matter, Dorian told her fiercely. It doesn't fucking matter, because he trusts me. Besides, I came close, but I didn't .
He could feel the deity's anger, boiling under his skin like it was his own. She hadn't intended for it to go like this, Dorian could tell. She had expected to make his life miserable for the night, just to have some fun with him, but that plan had failed.
Fine, she growled. Then have some consequences for your broken contract, and we'll see how far that trust takes you. Lolth left his mind with a snap that nearly made him cry out from the sheer force of her exit, and suddenly Dorian's entire body felt very, very wrong.
"Orym?" he said faintly.
"Yeah? I'm here, what is it?"
"I think I did something that put one of us in danger."