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“It’s already late afternoon, huh..?“ Shiki uttered underneath her breath, staring out of the window of her club room, watching a few rain drops silently slide down the glass. Her vision of the world was blurry, mind fuzzy – filled with so many different thoughts. She still had a project to work on for hers and Eri’s fashion club, something she wanted to finish as soon as possible. Then, she had also wanted to meet up with Rhyme this weekend to go strolling through Shibuya, finally indulging in a normal life again. Simply taking a walk without having to tremble each step, not fearing there would be monsters attacking her.
Quickly, the brown-haired girl shook her head, a frown gracing her face, as she turned away to approach her bag that was on the big table in the middle of the room. This whole insane game had happened a few weeks ago and yet she was still chained to it. Her mind kept wandering back to all that had happened. So many moments that had left her frightened, angry, desperate, hopeless... Shiki couldn’t help but shiver upon being reminded of this experience. She told herself to stay strong and not get lost in the negative emotions, however, this proved much more difficult in reality.
“Come on, it’s all over. No need to get hung up over it…” She lightly slapped herself on both her cheeks with her hands, heaving a heavy sigh. After all, there were amazing things that had come out of the Reaper’s Game too. She was able to meet new friends; people who hadn’t been too far away before the game but whose presence she had only started to acknowledge afterwards. Rhyme and Beat had made her laugh so many times already and frankly, it really did help with coping with these traumatic events. Whenever their group spent time together, she couldn’t help but smile brightly, eyes reflecting the joy filling her whole being. Furthermore, Shiki had finally learned to accept herself as she was. She didn’t wish to be Eri’s shadow anymore.
She wanted to step onto a stage, made for only her, and shine as the brightest star of her night sky.
Sure, she was still very shy, that would probably stay that way for a long time, nevertheless, she had gained determination. The wish to stay true to who she was deep on the inside. For the first time in such a long while had she experienced what it meant to be comfortable in one’s own body. When she woke up at home after the game had ended and looked in the mirror after what had seemed like ages…
She had been shocked.
This was someone completely different she was looking at.
Yet it was her to her core.
This was Shiki in every way and in a far away corner of her heart, a wall broke, urging tears to her eyes, as she brimmed with relief.
Ever since that day, Shiki had stopped in front of her mirror several times a day – often worrying about her outfits, wondering what would look good on her since she was used to wearing Eri’s clothes or making different poses to try and get a better understanding of who she truly was. Many times, had she taken off her glasses, leaned in close to be able to see something, thought back to who she had been during the Reaper’s Game but then placed the vision help back on her nose, slightly smiling. It wasn’t always easy to be at ease with how things were now, however, Shiki wanted to love herself more. During difficult days she would hug Mr. Mew tightly, pacing back and forth in her room before falling onto her bed, mind getting lost in lands of her dreams.
Overall, she had done a great step forward to her goal and she was proud. Shiki realized how thankful she was for the Reaper’s Game on the one hand for helping her out with this disastrous struggle. But obviously she couldn’t just credit that odd game – it was rather the people who had been with her that had supported her journey. And especially one individual came to mind.
Her heart skipped a beat, as she quickly picked up her bag, rummaging around in it to distract herself. That boy with stupidly spiky hair and a pretty terrible fashion taste did not leave her mind. Honestly, Shiki found herself thinking about him very often – maybe more often than she would ever like to admit. He had had a gigantic impact on her life, aiding her in discovering who she was deep on the inside and, more precisely, encouraging her to finally be herself.
“I think you’re fine being you.”
“So, you’re pretty… Amazing.”
The brown-haired girl’s cheeks flushed bright red, as she shook her head with all her might. Just remembering the things he had said to her, full of genuine admiration despite his stoic tone while he had tried to act all cool… It made her heart race so much, she was afraid she’d feel dizzy from all this heat rushing through her body.
Returning back to reality, Shiki hummed to herself in disappointment, realizing she hadn’t brought an umbrella.
“Well, maybe if I run home I will get back before it starts raining too heavily…” She surmised quietly to herself, grasping the strap of her school bag and making her way down to the entrance to put on her shoes. After she had prepared everything to leave school, she was about to walk outside, when a familiar sight greeted her.
Neku was standing right next to the doors, eyes focused on the far away sky, as if he had disappeared into a completely different realm. He looked so lost in thought, it worried Shiki quite a bit, so she raised an eyebrow, before taking a deep breath and approaching the boy.
As she got closer, she realized how tense his posture was. Was he in pain? Shiki gripped her bag tighter, reaching out with her free hand and hesitantly placing it on the orange-haired boy’s shoulder. He did not react to the touch in any way, hence the girl cleared her throat and timidly called out to him.
“Hey Neku, are you alright..?”
It was only when her soft voice reached his ears, he flinched out of surprise and hastily whirled around on his feet, eyes wide open. Upon recognizing Shiki, he slightly sighed, awkwardly averting his gaze.
“It’s just you…”
Shiki wasn’t hurt by his statement or anything – this was Neku they were talking about, after all. He was always rather cold on the outside but just like her, he had grown immensely as a person ever since the Reaper’s Game. He was starting to be more open-minded and let the world in with all the joys it brought. She was glad he was changing alongside her. Together, she felt as if they could do almost everything.
“Is something wrong?” Shiki finally asked, unable to conceal the worry within her voice, as she drew back her hand from him and twirled a strand of her short brown hair with it.
“No, I was just thinking…” he simply replied, sounding indifferent than he had wished to but being back in reality and talking so casually to her was still weird for him, “I kind of forgot about the time, remembering a few things.”
“Oh, you mean… The game?” She inquired, very careful with her choice of words.
He hummed in agreement, adjusting the bag on his shoulder.
“Well, I actually think about it pretty often too… You know, how we had to go through so many difficult times… How Shibuya was completely different,” she started, realizing her words were very depressing, so she weakly chuckled, a sweat drop running down the side of her head, “So, uh, I think it’s completely normal to be reminded of that!”
Shiki wildly waved her arms around in the air, unable to cope with her nervousness otherwise, insecurely smiling at the boy. Meanwhile, Neku blinked a few times, hoping Shiki wasn’t swallowed by too many negative memories. He had been terrible to her at the beginning of the first week and frankly, he kind of wanted to erase that from her mind. He was ashamed he had treated her poorly when she deserved so much better. Ever since they had started talking more during the game, he had only ever thought that he wanted her to be happy. Neku prayed inside his mind she had a positive image of him. Otherwise… He’d be pretty down.
“Thanks.” A very faint smile danced on his lips for the blink of an eye and though it disappeared incredibly fast, Shiki didn’t miss it. How glad she was to have seen that rare expression since it always warmed her heart, filling her with pure bliss.
“Well, do you want to run home through the rain together?” She faintly snickered, guessing it would at least be more amusing that way. “If we leave now, we might just get back before the weather gets worse!”
Her cheerful proposal eased Neku’s mind in an instant and he nodded, unable to say no to such a beautiful smile. The two of them nodded at each other, determined like they had been back then as a team, before dashing outside, already feeling the rain drops patter on their heads. The ground beneath their feet was wet already and some of the dirt jumped up upon them running through it. As some mud hit Shiki’s legs, she winced, sighing disappointedly.
“Oh come on, that’s just gross…”
She unconsciously slowed down, wanting to use a tissue to remove the stains, however, the rain quickly got worse. Realizing that, Neku’s body moved on its own. He grabbed Shiki’s free hand, interlacing their fingers and tightly holding onto it as he continued sprinting down the street. Shiki almost froze, hadn’t it been for her moving feet, baffled by the boy’s gentle touch and the warmth traveling up her arm now, washing away all that surrounded them. Her face was bright red, as she blankly stared at their joined hands, forgetting about the mud on her legs.
At the same time, Neku turned around a corner and slowly came to realize what he was doing. His first instinct was to promptly let go of the girl’s hand due to his surprise, however, he only gripped it tighter, explaining to himself he was doing this so they’d get home without being completely soaked. His cheeks were dyed in a pinkish color too, a fire burning underneath his skin, making him ignore the cold from the weather. While his body was staying in reality, passing one house after another, his mind was stuck with thoughts about Shiki. How much he actually enjoyed going home together with her even though the situation was like this. How much his heart skipped beats whenever he was with her. But that was all it was, right? Surely, he felt that way because of how they had been together, all by themselves, during the game. He wasn’t quite certain what was going on with him but in that moment, it didn’t matter. The sounds of the rain, their shared warmth, the adrenaline rushing through his body because of all the running they were doing… This moment was perfect the way it was.
It didn’t take long and they arrived at Neku’s house, whereas the boy automatically slowed down. The simple rain had turned into quite the tempest, wind violently pushing them around, heavy water droplets hammering onto their heads, leaving behind an uncomfortable sensation. Technically, Shiki still had a little more running to do but for some reason, Neku refused to let her go on in this weather.
“You can come inside and wait here until the rain stops!” The boy yelled so his voice would overpower the loud breezes. Shiki did not have any time to hesitate, seeing how Neku already pulled her with him to the front door, letting go of her hand to open the entrance. She felt a heavy weight fall off her shoulders, though something nagged at her heart at the same time, drawing the corners of her lips downwards.
Both of them hurriedly jumped inside, leaving the storm outside and breathing more steadily again, relieved they were safe. Shiki awkwardly grasped the strap of her bag tighter, unsure of how to behave now that she was in his house. This was a first for her, after all.
Simultaneously, Neku removed his shoes, placing them next to the entrance, stepping into the corridor. After he had taken two steps, he noticed Shiki was still in place, so he raised an eyebrow.
“You’re not coming inside?”
“Uh, no no, I’ll be right there!” She yelped, mirroring his movements, carefully putting her shoes next to Neku’s, feeling on the edge. Was his family home? Were there any rules she had to watch out for? Though she was fully soaked and freezing a little, her mind was more occupied with how to behave now. To say she was a little overwhelmed probably was an understatement.
“My parents aren’t home yet so you don’t need to be so nervous. Actually, let’s get a change of clothes. I don’t think you want to stay in wet ones.”
Neku was already strolling upstairs to, what Shiki assumed, was his room, while she was continuously stepping from one foot onto the other in the corridor.
‘Come on, you can do this!’ She encouraged herself on the inside, slowly tracing the boy’s steps.
Before she was able to step into his room though, he hastily dashed out of it and closed the door behind him, cheeks tainted pink while he cleared his throat, obviously trying to act collected.
“Uhm, you can wear this for now.” He held out a black t-shirt with some graffiti design on it and a pair of grey sweatpants, his eyes everywhere but on Shiki.
The girl found his shy attitude to be kind of adorable, yet contagious, as she was already nervous in the first place. Wearing his clothes was a little too much, right..?
“It’s fine, I’m sure my own outfit will dry soon and I’ll probably leave in a few minutes anyway!” She laughed it off.
To that, Neku merely shook his head, finally meeting her line of sight.
“No they won’t. Also, you’re not dumb enough to really believe that storm will settle that fast.” He was pouting, unwilling to back down and though that cute expression made Shiki want to laugh, she swallowed that urge down. Admittedly, he was right. Judging from how the weather had been a moment ago, this would take a while. So, she really had to wear his clothes…
The embarrassment was too much to bear, hence she fake-pouted, replying, “Jeez, you could be nicer about it though…”
Finally, she accepted the change of clothes, entering the bathroom after Neku had told her where she could change. Once she had hung up her school uniform on the heating there, she looked at herself in the mirror. Even though Neku wasn’t much taller and definitely not broadly built, his clothes were too large for her delicate frame, making her look like she wore a sack.
“Good thing I don’t have to go outside in these.” She chuckled to herself to make light of the situation that still left her with reddened cheeks.
After she had left the bathroom, Neku joined her at the top of the stairs, coming out of his room in a new set of clothes too. He made sure to close the door behind him before Shiki could even spare as much of a glance inside, which only fueled her curiosity. Unable to hold back, she asked, “So, what are we supposed to do now? Do you want to show me your room?”
Just after she had said that, did she realize it could’ve come off as very intrusive and rude, so she gasped, once again gesturing with her hands all over the place.
“Ah, I didn’t mean anything weird by it! I just wanted to start a normal conversation, you know, so…”
Neku couldn’t help but smile a little as he watched her, overwhelmed by her bashfulness.
“We can just go down into the living room.”
“Uhm, if you don’t mind me asking: Why not use your room..? I’m really just curious…” Shiki admitted, trying to be as mindful as she usually was. Frankly, she wasn’t too sure why there was this sudden interest in checking out where he usually spent his time… She kind of wanted to know more about him but she wasn’t sure if she was approaching the topic well enough.
“It’s…” Neku averted his gaze, twisting a strand of hair between his fingers, now really missing the collar from his Reaper’s Game outfit to hide his face, “A mess…”
Understanding that, Shiki made no more attempts at invading his privacy like that, simply following him to the living room instead. They sat down on the couch, while Neku turned on the TV so there wouldn’t be an awkward silence.
He found his gaze drifting over to Shiki’s silhouette several times, drawn to this unusual sight of her wearing his clothes. It didn’t take long for her to notice, raising an eyebrow at him.
“What’s wrong?”
He fumbled with the right choice of words for a moment, his eyes landing on the screen in front of them.
“My shirt is way too big on you…” he mumbled, to which she dejectedly hummed in agreement, “But it’s cute.”
That last part was almost inaudible with the noise coming from the TV but Shiki caught it, her face immediately bright red. Maybe being in this strange outfit was worth it after all.
Moments like these really made reality such a brighter place.