Work Text:
"You know, Potter, I finally figured out what is wrong with you."
"Have you, now?"
"You do not know how to have fun. There. Somebody had to say it."
"Thank you, 'cause I figured out what your problem is too."
"Am I... too wonderful?"
"No, you're a posh, stuck-up, lazy bump on a log."
"Ha, ha. Killjoy."
"What did you say?"
"Nothing. Stick-in-the-mud."
"Listen here, Malfoy. This stick-in-the-mud has had to work like a house-elf his whole childhood while you've been sucking on a silver spoon chasing toy Snitches around your - your ivory tower!"
"Actually, it's polished marble."