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“Hunk,” a 10 year old Lance whispered into the silence of his bedroom.
“Mmm,” was the only response, near inaudible in the silence.
“Was that an ‘I’m awake’ mm, or an ‘I’m asleep’ mm.”
“Mmm,” Hunk repeated, a bit louder this time. Lance peered off the bed to where his friend was laying on a mattress on the floor. Hunk’s outline under the blankets was still. Too still? Lance wondered.
“Okay, and was that an ‘I heard you the first time what do you want’ mm, or a ‘leave me alone I’m trying to sleep’ mm?
“Mmm.”
Lance absolutely could not believe this. Just as he had decided it was a ‘leave me alone’ mm, the moon broke from behind some clouds and soft light shone through the curtains, illuminating what was almost certainly a smile on Hunk’s lips.
“You’re the worst ,” Lance groaned, lobbing his pillow right onto that smirking face.
“Hey!” Hunk’s reaction was immediate and drastic, body spasming in a way that forced Lance to fall back on his bed, hands clasped tight over his mouth to stop the giggles from waking up the rest of the house. A shadow loomed over him, and Lance was forced to curl up for protection as his own pillow was wielded against him by an angry Hunk.
“I was trying to sleep, but somebody won’t shut up !” Hunk whisper-shouted, but Lance could hear the smile from a mile away. If Hunk had truly been asleep, nothing on Heaven or Earth would have been able to wake him.
“ Lo siento, lo siento! ” Lance giggled, grabbing for the pillow to stop the onslaught. The two boys wrestled with it for a minute, until Hunk won out and Lance was pulled from his bed with a loud shriek.
Both boys froze instantly, Lance still dangling half off of the bed as they strained to listen for the telltale sound of rustling or creaking floorboards from another room. Thankfully, silence prevailed, and Lance slumped all the way off of his bed and onto Hunk’s mattress with another quiet giggle. Hunk finally relinquished the pillow with a sigh, plopping onto Lance’s bed with an unseen smile.
“Your parents are never going to let me come back over,” he accused, and Lance scoffed.
“As if, they love you!”
“As much as they love being able to sleep through the night?”
“More than,” Lance grinned, and Hunk shook his head.
“I’m pretty sure it’s just you who thinks that, man.”
Lance didn’t respond, gazing out the window to watch the stars twinkle in the sky like he did most nights. A peaceful silence fell over the boys, and Lance’s mind eventually wandered back to what he’d originally wanted to ask, and he bit his lip, glancing over at Hunk. He silently debated whether he should say anything at all, but ultimately reached the same conclusion he had the first time: Hunk wouldn’t care even if it was crazy. He was the best friend ever, after all.
“Hunk?” he whispered again, quieter than before.
“Yeah?”
“Have you ever wanted something so bad that it hurt?”
There was the sound of rustling as Hunk rolled over to look at Lance. “Like my mom’s world famous snickerdoodles?”
Lance smiled as the memory of sugary cinnamon goodness washed over his tongue, but shook his head. “No, not like a physical thing. I mean more like... an idea. A wish that you wish for so hard that you just know it’s true somehow. You know?”
“Uh..no. What do you mean?”
Lance hesitated again, but there was no judgment in Hunk’s voice, and Lance felt safe in this space. Lying in his room in the dark, his best friend just a few feet away and only the stars watching, Lance found courage.
“You know how much I like space, right?”
“Uh, yeah ,” Hunk snorted. “Your entire bedroom is a living NASA advertisement. I’m literally laying on your rocket ship blanket right now, looking up at your ceiling covered with glow in the dark stars.”
Lance laughed, realizing he had very much stated the obvious. Hunk laughed too at the idea that he could possibly forget such a simple fact, and they dissolved into giggles thinking about the obvious.
Hey Hunk, you like building things, right?
Hey Lance, you still like going to the beach, don’t you?
It was the kind of humor only to be found late at night when nothing made sense because it didn’t have to. Eventually, they composed themselves again, and Lance carried on, heart feeling much lighter.
“Well, I mean. Obviously I like space ,” he giggled. “But it’s more than just that. I’ve never told anyone this, but I want to go into space someday.”
He saw Hunk’s head tip from the corner of his eye. “Why?”
And there was the sticking point. “I don’t know,” Lance whispered. “But it’s like. I’m laying here, looking up at the stars, and it feels... it feels like I belong there. I think about what it would be like to float with the stars and there’s this... tugging, in my chest. Like it’s where I belong.” His hand reached up, as if to grasp them in his fingers. Beyond them was the universe, and he could feel how it called to him even now. Not that he didn't love Earth, some of Lance's favorite memories were of the beach, his family, his home. And yet something still drew his gaze upward.
“It feels like there’s something up there waiting for me,” he decided on, hand falling limp once more with a soft thump .
Hunk was silent for a few minutes, looking out the window at what he knew were giant burning balls of gas and fire, millions and millions of miles away. He thought about the rockets astronauts rode into space, his stomach twisting uncomfortably at the thought. He thought about floating in the vast nothingness of space, everything he knew so far away he could no longer even see them.
No, Hunk thought, he was definitely happy right on Earth. But looking at Lance, Hunk could see longing. And he understood.
“Who do you think it is?” Hunk asked, curious.
Lance shook his head, unable to put a finger on the feeling. “I don’t know. Do I sound crazy? I probably sound crazy, right?”
“I don’t think you’re crazy,” Hunk said simply. “I think you’ll just have to go up there some day and find whatever it is yourself.”
Lance’s breath caught in his throat, and he looked at Hunk. “Do you think I can? Space is so big , and so far away, and it must be so hard to get there...”
Hunk smiled. “I know you can.”