Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Teen Wolf. They belong to their creator. 

Finding My Way Back To You

Chris had been on strict bed rest for over a month, and in that time he hadn’t seen Peter’s human form once.  In fact, Peter’s wolf was currently curled up at Chris’ feet while he sat in the wheelchair that he’d finally been able to use.  Chris didn’t know why Peter hadn’t turned human again, and he really wanted his boyfriend to be helping him.  No one knew why Peter had evolved into a wolf in the first place, although Derek had an idea that it was because of Chris.  

Peter had found out about Chris being hurt, and started to blame himself and his inner-wolf had reacted by having Peter do a full shift. Once Peter had shifted he’d refused to turn human again, so Chris hadn’t even seen Peter’s human form since before he was hurt. Peter’s wolf was almost entirely dark brown save for some lighter brown and grey patches on his face and paws. His eyes were still a brilliant vibrant blue, in both wolf and human form. 

Chris looked down at Peter’s wolf and let out a sigh when he realised that the wolf had taken up residence on his feet. The reason that Chris was sitting in the chair in the first place was that his back had been injured, but he also had lost feeling from his knees down due to nerve damage.  They’d had him try to walk at the hospital but he hadn’t been able to, he’d fallen only to be caught by Derek as he’d brought wolf Peter into the hospital as a ‘support animal’ after explaining that it was Peter. 

“Peter, baby please,” Chris spoke softly hoping that he’d get some kind of response out of Peter. Peter just looked up at Chris and then continued to rest his head on his feet. “Peter, would you at least please take me to the bathroom?” Chris asked, Peter’s wolf form had for a few days pushed Chris with his nose to the bathroom and sat watching to make sure he didn’t get hurt. 

Peter whimpered as he pushed Chris to their bathroom door before he was pushing the door open with his front paw. Peter couldn’t tell Chris that he was blaming himself for what had happened, although Chris had a feeling that it was the case. Peter hadn’t even been in town when it had happened, he’d gotten back into Beacon Hills three days later. He hadn’t made it to the hospital until two days after being back in town, he hadn’t even made it inside before he’d shifted without warning. 

“Peter, I know you’re still in there,” Chris just wanted to be held by Peter and to know that he was safe. “Talk to me, please?” Peter just whimpered and nudged Chris into the bathroom with his nose.  “I can’t do this without you,” Chris spoke quietly, he didn’t want to wake Derek who he thought was asleep at the opposite end of the house. 

“Chris, are you okay?” Chris heard Derek’s voice from somewhere in the house, and knew that he needed to ask him for help. “Chris? Is everything okay?” Derek asked again, this time moving closer to the guest bedroom where Chris was currently with Peter at his feet again.

“In the bathroom, I was going to use the toilet but Peter is continuously resting on my feet,” Chris told him, once Derek was in his line of sight. Derek knew that Chris was still struggling with his new disability, and was doing his best to help him. 

Derek nodded and stepped into the bathroom, before he was picking up Peter and moving him out of the way, he was going to have words with the wolf.  Derek watched as Chris moved the wheelchair closer to the toilet before he was trying to get it at the right angle and failing. Chris looked at Derek and didn’t have to say anything before the younger man was moving the wheelchair and locking it. Chris hadn’t quite worked out how to use the toilet without assistance as he needed someone to hold him while he removed his pants. 

“He’ll come to his senses soon, I hope,” Derek said as he helped Chris by holding him up so that the older man could pull his pants down to use the toilet. Previously Chris had a catheter and adult diapers due to the complete bed rest.  “You know you don’t have to be ashamed to ask for help,”

“Not ashamed, just not used to it,” Chris admitted, it wasn’t the first time that they’d had the conversation and it usually resulted with Peter’s wolf making disgruntled sounds. “Doctor Geyer said that it could be permanent, that I won’t be able to feel them again,”

“I heard him, I couldn’t help listening to the diagnosis,” Derek told him as he helped lower him onto the toilet. “I’ll be out in the hall,” Chris nodded, he knew that Derek would be as he had been helping with most things that he couldn’t do on his own and taking him to the bathroom was the biggest thing. 

Peter’s wolf stood at the door of the bathroom and stared at Chris and then at the wheelchair and then back at Chris. Chris sighed before he watched as Derek was picking Peter up and carrying him over to the bed. Chris lost sight of Derek and Peter once they were on the bed as they were at the end of the bed. Peter’s wolf looked at Derek, who flashed his eyes bright blue at the older wolf. Peter growled at him, before Derek was simply shaking his head at him. 

“Peter, what happened to Chris, it isn’t your fault,” Derek sighed as he tried to get the older wolf to listen to him. “No one knew what was going to happen, we couldn’t have stopped it even if we wanted to,” Derek knew that his uncle didn’t know the full story as the wolf had run when he’d seen Chris laying in the hospital bed. “He was shot multiple times in the back, and hit by a car...the combination is what Melissa and Doctor Geyer said caused the paralysis in his knees and feet,” Peter whimpered at Derek and then shifted his body so that he could peer into the bathroom at Chris. “Uncle Peter, he needs you. Hell I need you,” Derek peered into the bathroom he’d had an ear out while he spoke to Peter and hadn’t heard any sound in minutes. “Chris, are you okay?” 

“I could use a little…assistance…” Chris said, as he’d managed to get his pants to his knees, but it was the motion of standing and staying upright that he couldn’t do without falling. 

“Give me one minute,” Derek called back and looked at his uncle, Peter’s wolf form looked at Derek and tilted his head to the side. “Peter, are you stuck?”  If Derek wasn’t mistaken, Peter looked a little sheepish. “You, you stay here,” Derek ran a hand over his face before he was going in to help Chris.

“Did you just ask him if he was stuck?” Chris raised his eyebrow at the younger man, Derek nodded as he walked over to Chris and was helping him to stand and pull his pants up. “I think it’s getting worse,” 

“Do you want to go back to the hospital and get checked out?” Derek asked once Chris was settled back into the wheelchair.  “Chris?”

“I don’t think so…honestly don’t think I get any further than back in bed,” Chris admitted, he didn’t want to go back to the hospital.  Chris wheeled himself over to the sink, washing his hands before he was wheeling himself back to the bed. “I…where did Peter go?

Peter had jumped off the bed, and was cowering under the end of the bed. Derek rolled his eyes as he crouched down and looked under the bed and saw Peter’s bright blue wolf eyes staring at him. Chris raised his eyebrow as he looked at Derek, if he could have he would have joined him in looking under the bed.  Peter let out a low growl to which Derek responded with his own and reached under the bed pulling the wolf out. Peter continued to growl at Derek who just shook his head and set him on the bed again. 

Chris was still sitting in his wheelchair, as he realised that it was getting much harder for him to transfer on his own and his back was starting to cause him a lot of pain. Derek turned to look at Chris and realised that the older man was radiating in pain so he was quickly at his side and putting his hand on his shoulder before he managed to scoop him up and put him back into bed. Chris lay on his back, before trying to roll over onto his right side. Peter saw what his boyfriend was doing and decided to give him a little nudge with his nose. 

“Peter, what are you doing?” Chris questioned, as he found the wolf climbing over him once he was on his side. Derek had put a pillow between his knees, and made sure there was one behind his back. “Derek, what’s your uncle doing?”

“I think…I think he wants to snuggle with you and take your pain,” Derek replied, he was starting to get the feeling that Peter might be able to shift back if he actually relaxed with Chris. 

“Peter?” Chris glanced down at the wolf who was starting to make himself comfortable in front of him. “You want my arm?” Chris questioned as the wolf nodded in response before nipping at the sleeve of Chris’ shirt and pulling it over him. “Derek, can you?” 

“Yeah, I’ll leave you two alone and go call Melissa,” Derek replied, quickly pulling the blanket back over them and leaving the room. “And I’ll bring you in a wheatbag in a while,”

Once Peter was satisfied that Chris’ arm was over him and they were both under the covers the wolf got a little closer to Chris.  Chris wondered what Peter was planning before he realised that Peter was taking his pain.  As they lay Chris started to slowly drift off to sleep, while Peter kept making sure that Chris’ arm stayed on him. Peter’s wolf realised that he was laying on Chris’ right arm, and might have been squishing it. Peter went to move but found that Chris was pulling him closer to him. 

Derek contemplated calling Melissa about Chris, but decided to wait a little while to see if Peter would shift back or not. Peter’s wolf seemed to settle into Chris’ arms as Derek checked on them and saw that Chris was asleep. Peter let out a low growl at his nephew causing Chris’ eyes to open briefly before closing again.  Peter hadn’t slept in Chris’ arms in over a month, not since before he’d left for business.   Derek was starting to wonder if it was the human connection of being in his boyfriend’s arms that Peter needed to know that he was safe.

Chris kept his arms around Peter’s wolf as they slept, it was the first time he’d been able to sleep without being in an immense amount of pain. As Chris slept, his head slowly slid down the pillow until it was resting on Peter’s snout.  Peter’s eyes started to drift closed as they lay and soon enough the wolf had fallen asleep.  As the two of them slept, Peter’s wolf relaxed into Chris’ arms and the wolf slowly shifted back into his human. Chris opened his eyes as he felt the naked body of Peter in his arms as opposed to the fur from the wolf that he’d fallen asleep with.

Chris glanced down at the top of Peter’s head as the younger man continued to sleep. Peter slept soundly in Chris’ arms before he sensed that the older man was looking at him. Slowly Peter opened his eyes, and was met with Chris smiling athim. Peter was a little confused by Chris smiling, he didn’t know what had happened while they slept.  Peter raised his eyebrow, still not connecting that he wasn’t a wolf anymore.  Chris moved his left hand and ran it over Peter’s face, before he was cupping the younger man’s face with his hand.  Peter instinctively reached his own left hand for Chris’ before he realised it was a hand and not a paw. 

Peter blinked, not knowing what to do. He didn’t know whether he was dreaming or if he had really turned back into a human.  Chris held Peter’s hands in his and tried to keep the younger man close to him. Peter shook his head, he wasn’t sure what was going on. Chris smiled at him before he spoke. 

“Peter, you need to breathe,” Chris spoke quietly to the wolf, he didn’t want to scare his now human again boyfriend.  “Peter…”

Peter blinked and looked almost blankly at Chris, before he was trying to pull his hands away. ‘Hands…I have hands again…’ Peter thought to himself, he was having trouble remembering how to vocalise words instead of growls and grunts. 

“Shh, don’t try and talk,” Chris was still speaking quietly to him, he could tell that Peter was slightly terrified by being human again.  “Derek, I know you’re listening…do you maybe want to uh help me for a minute?” 

Derek was sitting in the living room, reading when he’d heard a soft cracking sound that he’d recognise anywhere.  A few seconds later he realised that Peter’s breathing had changed from  panting to a more regular human breathing pattern. Derek put the book he was reading down on the coffee table after realising that his uncle had turned human again, but he wasn’t sure why.  Chris held onto Peter trying to calm the younger man down as he started to freak out slightly.  Peter had started to hyperventilate not knowing what else to do. Chris ran his hands up and down Peter’s arms before he was kissing him on the forehead. 

“Peter, we need you to breathe, do you think you can do that?” Chris asked quietly as Derek walked into the room after having gotten Peter a pair of sweatpants and a shirt. 

“Uncle Peter, you’re okay. You’re human again, don’t try to speak yet it’ll take a bit for your voice to come back,” Derek explained as he set the clothes on the bed, and looked at Peter who had shut his eyes tightly. “Breathe for us,” Peter nodded a little and slowly opened his eyes again, this time blinking as he looked between Chris and Derek. 

“Do you think you can sit up for me and get dressed?” Chris asked, he was wondering if Peter would remember how to human after over a month as a wolf.  Peter half nodded and half shook his head, he could only remember to stand on all fours. “Let me sit up and then I’ll help you?” Chris slowly pushed himself until he was sitting up and leaning against the headboard.

“Melissa’s coming by after she finishes at the hospital,” Derek said, as he helped Chris to finish sitting up right. “She said that she doesn’t want you to move around too much either,”

“Peter, take my hands,” Chris held his hands out for Peter to take and waited until his boyfriend was holding them before he slowly pulled him upright. “Derek’s  going to help you, do you think you can let him?” Peter nodded a little and glanced at Derek before he was focussing on Chris again.

Derek picked up the shirt again and pulled it over Peter’s head before Chris was putting Peter's arms through the arm hole.  Peter almost looked terrified as Chris and Derek were sitting him up further before Chris went back to leaning against the bed frame. Derek put his hand on Peter’s shoulder to see if the family connection was there, that he would realise taht he wasn’t in any danger. Peter shrank back slightly before Derek was pulling away the blanket and helping Peter to pull the tracksuit pants on.  Chris smiled reassuringly at Peter as he knew that Derek had experience in helping someone get dressed after he’d been helping him since he’d been released from the hospital. 

“Derek, I don’t think I’m going to be able to move on my own for a while…” Chris trailed off, his back was starting to hurt even more than before, and he wasn’t sure if he could actually feel his legs or not.  “Peter, it’s not your fault, I promise. Okay?”  Peter nodded, he was beginning to slowly understand that it wasn’t anything he did or didn’t do.  

“Melissa’ll be here in I think half an hour to check both of you out,” Derek said, as he leant over Peter and put his hand on Chris’ leg and watched as black veins pulsed up his arm.  “Peter, do you think you can walk to the kitchen with me?” 

Peter nodded a little before Derek was helping him to his feet and letting the older man lean against him as he was a little unsteady after being a wolf for so long.  Derek kept his arm around Peter’s waist to keep him upright as they walked the shoty distance to the kitchen. Once they’d gotten to the kitchen Derek pulled a stool out for Peter. Peter looked at Derek and then at the stool causing Derek to sigh before he was helping his uncle to climb onto it.  Peter sat on the stool and watched his nephew, he was still confused over what had happened. 

“Peter, you’re scared about what happened aren’t you?” Derek asked, he was still listening to Chris and making sure that the older man was okay in the bedroom.  Peter opened his mouth to try and speak but wasn’t even sure if could remember how to speak. 

“Derek, can I come in?” Melissa called, Derek had been so preoccupied with his uncle and Chris that he hadn’t noticed the time. 

“Doors unlocked, I have Peter in the kitchen,” Derek answered, and listened as Melissa opened the front door and entered the building before shutting it and making her way to Derek and Peter.  

“Hi Peter, how are you feeling?” Melissa asked, Peter looked at Derek and then at Melissa, he still hadn’t said a word since he’d woken up.  “Has he spoken, Derek?” 

Peter shook his head, he wanted to speak but it was like his brain just wouldn’t co-operate with him.  Melissa smiled at Peter as she put her bag on the counter, she had a few things and she had told Doctor Geyer that she was making a house call after she finished at the hospital. Melissa gently took Peter’s hand and checked his pulse and found that it was racing so she decided to check his heart as well. 

“Peter, I’m just going to help Chris for a minute. Melissa is going to stay with you, okay?” Derek questioned, Peter nodded he liked Melissa and he wanted to know why he couldn’t speak. 

“I’ll come and check on Chris when I finish checking Peter,” Melissa told him, Derek smiled at her before he disappeared into the spare bedroom before she was back to checking on Peter. “Peter, this might be a little cold, but can you lift up your shirt for me?”  Peter nodded, he wasn’t entirely sure what Melissa was going to do to him. Melissa smiled at him as she pulled her stethoscope out and then put it on and put it to Peter’s chest and listened again. “Sweetheart, do you think you can take a deep breath for me?” Peter shook his head, he’d been trying and hadn’t been able to all morning. 

“Melissa’s checking on Peter, how are you feeling?” Derek questioned, as he moved Chris’ wheelchair back to the bed and put the brakes on. 

“Like hell, Derek I can’t feel anything now,” Chris took a deep breath, he wasn’t sure what had changed or why the pain had become so unbearable that he now couldn’t feel anything below where he’d been shot. “You know they couldn’t get the bullet out closest to my spine?” Derek nodded, he knew everything about what had happened with Chris. “I’ve been feeling it move and now nothing…”

“Why didn’t you say anything before now?” Derek asked, he knew that Chris was stubborn but he didn’t think that he had been that stubborn. 

“I assumed it was just the back pain but after today I’m not so sure anymore,” Chris replied, as Derek began to realise why Chris had been asking him for more help in the last few days. “I’m stupid I know, but I didn’t want to go back again,” 

“We could have had Melissa here much earlier,” Derek told him before he was sitting on the bed next to Chris and putting his hand on his shoulder. “You know that she’s going to want you to go to the hospital again right?”

“I know, and I really don’t want to because they won’t be able to do anything,” Chris told him, Derek sighed and continued to drain his pain as he watched the older man’s eyes starting to close. “I’ll wear the back brace if I have to but I don’t want to go back,”

Forty-five minutes later Chris was in an ambulance going back to Beacon Hills Memorial Hospital to get an X-ray done on his spinal cord. That night Chris was being released with the news that he’d been expecting, the bullet had moved and lodged itself firmly into his spinal cord paralysing him further from the waist down giving him no feeling below the waist. 

After three weeks of being human again, Peter realised that it wasn’t his fault that Chris had been injured, and wouldn’t be able to walk again. He wanted to speak, to tell him that he was sorry that he had turned into a wolf but he couldn’t. He hadn’t been able to speak without getting scared that nothing would come out. He also hadn’t left Chris’ side and held him and helped him however he could. Derek had been showing and helping him to take care of Chris and it had become evident that neither of the older men were going to be leaving him any time soon. 

“Chris, I have to go out for a few hours. Do you think you and Peter will be okay?” Derek questioned as he stood in the bedroom door where Chris and Peter were laying in bed with Chris reading to Peter. “It’ll only be for a few hours,” 

“I think we’ll be okay, won’t we Peter?” Chris looked to Peter as he spoke and his boyfriend nodded, he had his head resting on Chris’ shoulder and his arms wrapped around him. “My shoulder’s a little sore and Peter’s helping,” 

“Alright, call me if you need anything,” Derek told them, before he was grabbing his keys and leaving the two older men alone for the first time since Peter had been human. 

Chris had to go back to wearing a back brace for upto 23 hours a day, the only time he wasn’t in it was when he was being showered or being dressed. Chris was told that he needed to wear it for the next ten weeks. Peter still had his head resting on Chris’ shoulder, he’d graduated from doing things with help to doing them on his own but he still hadn’t spoken a word. 

After Derek had left, Peter slowly helped Chris so that he was sitting up a little bit but still leaning against him. Chris turned his head to face Peter before he was brushing the younger man’s hair from his face. Peter looked at Chris before he was looking away from him, he was ashamed that he hadn’t been able to speak since he’d become human again.   Chris took Peter’s face in his hand and pulled it towards him before kissing him. 

“Peter, baby are you okay?” Chris asked, he wanted to hear his boyfriend's voice. He missed the younger man speaking and telling him exactly what he thought about everything.  “Peter, it’s just us,” 

Peter looked at Chris and opened his mouth to speak, he was a little afraid to actually speak still but if it was just them he’d be okay. “I…I’m sorry…” Peter muttered his voice rough from the lack of speaking. “You…pro…” Peter couldn’t get the words out before Chris was wrapping his arms around him.

“Peter, I don’t care as long as you’re safe,” Chris told him, he wished that he could do more than just lay in bed with him but that was all he was allowed to do being on bed-rest. “But please don’t ever think that you can’t speak with no voice,”

“Ass,” Peter looked away from Chris before he heard his boyfriend start to chuck causing him to chuckle. “What?” Peter whined, before he was taking Chris’ hand and drawing on his pain.

“I missed you, Peter,”